Comments by iknowbetter (page 7)

As if there’s something wrong with being over 40, or a portly senior citizen?

When she swings by the bar and grabs a handful of napkins on the way to the lap dance.

I tend to agree with Dolfan - there’s usually a reason why clubs don’t get reviewed often. They’re not popular because they’re a waste of time. However, there are notable exceptions. Deans Gold in North Miami comes to mind. Deans is under-reviewed, but in my opinion, a top tier club with top tier talent.

You gotta be careful getting that drunk and looking for sex in Pattaya. You might just end up with a hot girl who’s better hung than you are - not that there’s anything wrong with that, just saying.

Definitely not a legit review. Too many inconsistencies. “Not much goes on in lap dance” is definitely not accurate for DD.

She’s a beautiful young athlete, but I feel really creepy rating her out of context. I’d need to see her on a pole.

$175 / 15 min could be the quoted day shift rate, but expect that you’ll end up spending $250+ all in. I’ve come to expect to spend $350 for top performers.

Thanks for the review. No fluke. This has been exactly my experience at this club on afternoon / early evening visits. I can’t understand how this club remains open.

Impressive.

@JsmesSD - with those expectations?

I have to agree with Hank. I’m not a fan of the genre, but Billie Eilish is a transformative artist, and having heard her on interviews, she just might be a genius. To Muddy’s point, Eilish started intentionally wearing oversized, baggy clothes once people started noticing the fact that she was growing into a couple of DD’s. She wants people to notice her musical talent, not her boobs.

On the plus side, not having bookmarks forces me to look at reviews from other cities and clubs that I otherwise wouldn’t give a shit about.

Sorry you got ROBbed, but this one’s on you. Just because the first girl was willing to give you a HJ for the price of a dance doesn’t mean they all will. I have written about this exact situation happening to me at Cheetah Hallandale. It’s been said too many times on this forum - it is essential that you agree to expectations and total cost before going to the room. Especially if you’re negotiating through Google Translate. Also it’s not necessary to throw ones at a dancer. It makes you look petty.

If I have my shirt off or completely opened, I would actually prefer full torso to torso contact. Instead of licking my nips, I love it when she presses her nips to mine.

Have gotten this occasionally in the Miami market. Cost wise it’s on par with a HJ. Actually quite enjoyable since it’s uncovered, compared to CBJ or CFS.

B)

Thanks for the review. Deans is an often overlooked Miami club with quality talent. Your review was kind of rambling and incoherent but fun to read. I can relate to the 5%.

I assume costs quoted in CAD? Also do dancers speak English or only French?

@artie- you’re not alone with a wife tracking your every move. I think it’s pretty typical. You can only use the “phone ran out of charge” excuse so many times. Yes, life was a lot simpler before all this wonderful technology. Whenever I complain to my wife about not wanting to be tracked, she responds with “why? Are you going somewhere you’re not supposed to be?” Or “I’m only doing this because I’m concerned about your safety”. So yeah, I use the client meeting excuse too. I just wish they put strip clubs in office buildings downtown. I don’t have too many clients working out of a grimy industrial park near the airport.

Clearly Blah is asking for a friend. “I just found out about women getting turned on by male strippers” sounds a lot like when someone says “l heard about this new website called only friends or only fans, or something like that where girls sell naked pictures of themselves”, as if they know nothing about it.

Now that you’ve solved the smell dilemma, what do you do about the Find My Friends (or find my device) app, or a car that reports its location through an app?

Some of us actually lived through - and survived Miami in the ‘80’s - and have the stories (some true, most embellished) to tell about it. My parents sent me “up north” for college and graduate school for most of the decade, but Miami was really wild in those days, and yes I still have a few Sonny Crockett outfits, although I’d never fit into them these days.

Hallandale has one of the more reliable day shifts in the So Fla market, but talent can be hit or miss. OP obviously was there on a good day. The $100 HJ in the $25 non-private room has become the norm, but it’s important to discuss the “all in” cost beforehand to avoid a dispute after-the-fact.

Welcome to south Florida. I have never understood the appeal of cartoonish implants, but this does seem to be the norm these days at DD. I have not experienced the heckling by DD staff, but I agree that this would be annoying.

Thanks for the review. Porthole had completely fallen of my radar - and you just reminded me why.