How not to smell like a french whore when you get home
I work M-F 9-5 and like to sneak out on the DL for lunch. Problem is, I worry about the smell from all the perfume and lotions. What can I keep in the office to clean up before going home to the wife?I went to the thrift store and grabbed some slacks, shirt and longsleeve light sweater I can wear to avoid skin contact. But I still get paranoid I smell. I try to wash off the stink in the sink, but I still don't feel 100% sure it's gone. Maybe just guilt and paranoia. Any tips from you degenerates would be greatly appreciated.
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Other stuff:
- A travel steamer can help you with that, but it's better to have other clothes if you're into grinding with perfumy dancers.
- If you use a bar soap at home stop that immediately and use body wash. Keep the same body wash you use in a small travel container somewhere you can access it whereever you are. Half an ounce should do. If you have a stripper scent emergency it's better to smell like you than her. Just learn how long it takes or how much wiping you need to do to "age" it so it doesn't smell like you just took a shower.
- Pick girls who don't smell like a Macy's perfume counter lol.
- Scentless wipes can help, but that's more like break glass in case if emergency.
- Smelly takeout food or a slip up at the gas pump are your options of last resort.
Back when I cared if I could smell the girl before she got close to me she was sent away immediately. Others I would invite to sit beside me and casually check for perfume before I decided to let them on me. If I cared about speaking with them ever again I'd tell them they had on too much perfume for my tastes when I asked them to go. The ones who understood their market would seek me out the next time sans perfume.
A few years later if she's still there remind her of that when she wipes the perfume off before your vip trip.
Tell that bitch no? I don't need a woman badly enough to put up with that shit. Plus anyone I'd get with now has to be okay with "wallanon" because it's too much of a hassle to keep it all separate. At least with how I've handled things since the pandemic.
One of the girls I've started seeing is dropping hints like she wants off the market and (most likely stupidly) I'm not 100% opposed to the idea. Aside from being hot she's kidless, educated, and the right age. And I'm also not entirely convinced she's isn't more gay than bi lol. It's totally arbitrary, but the thing I'm most on the fence about is a well done but very large tattoo that's unhideable in a nice gown.
Lol. A dancer plopped down next to me last night who smelled like 50 Shades of Sluts all by her damn self. We didn't get dances.
I'm in a bad situation with a wife who'd I'd say is pretty prude and clinically depressed so I need to play it VERY careful or all hell will break loose for me and my kids.
So, yes she tracks my every move on FindMy.
I try to schedule it when I know she'll be busy at work or with a friend. I time out the drive so I'm back quick enough it won't arouse suspicion. I normally say "I have a client coming in at noon" or something like that and I'm in and out like a hitman.
Just trying to get more tips I haven't thought of.
Whenever I complain to my wife about not wanting to be tracked, she responds with “why? Are you going somewhere you’re not supposed to be?” Or “I’m only doing this because I’m concerned about your safety”. So yeah, I use the client meeting excuse too. I just wish they put strip clubs in office buildings downtown. I don’t have too many clients working out of a grimy industrial park near the airport.
Glad to hear others suffer like I. I fucking h8 this tracking nonsense. hatehatehate.
Also @twentyfive, no. I can't say I vounteer anywhere. It would lead to: "which girls are you working with" "why" "we should both do it on the weekend".
I'm screwed for the unforeseeable future.
Until she leaves town for a few days this summer.
Until she leaves town for a few days this summer."
That's not how geolocation works. It doesn't matter at all where she is it matters where your device is. She can track you from the moon. Fucking hell why ask a question that's completely not about the problem you're trying to solve? Rick Dugan is MIA but if he was around he'd tell you to grow some balls. Even so I digress.
To solve your track my balls problem, make a friend you can actually trust to keep your phone while you're off fucking around. Tell them never to answer it, but if you're future ex-wife is blowing up your phone to send a text message that you're in a meeting and to fuck off.
I'm half joking by the way, but the half that's typing is dead fucking serious lol.
On the phone thing, you’re kinda fucked. Does Find My work across platforms? Maybe find a reason to upgrade your phone to Android? Break your phone, give it to a kid and get yourself a new one, or just upgrade.
Also, I'm not sure that the tracking situation is "pretty typical". On the other hand, skibum has carved out a nice income for himself from people being tracked. So, who knows?
If she does a drive-by to confirm your whereabouts, schedule an appointment with skibum or equivalent to rid yourself of her.
Wallanon, I don’t know you but I can’t help but suggest that you pass on committing to a woman who you think prefers women. Unless of course you see an endless supply of threesomes as a realistic possibility
I'm wallanon. Of course I see an endless supply of threesomes as a realistic possibility...
“ Pick girls who don't smell like a Macy's perfume counter lol.” …Yes!!!
Also, I like to take a dump and then a post dump shower upon arrival. So, I smell like dove soap by the time I climb into bed.
Reading this reminds me of being in a relationship like f that. Every man wants to destroy a woman's freedom. Over it.
If it were me no matter how painful financially I’d cut the ties and walk, but many guys can’t do it for a number of reasons. Pride, the kids, financially, etc.
It’s guys like this that remind you why cam girls and porn are such big industries, because it’s the only relief some of these guys have access to.
Another advantage of the "second wardrobe" is that the change of clothes back from SC clothes to real-world clothes gives a chance to take stock and secure things like condoms and large denomination bills that you don't want to make a spontaneous appearance at home.
Not one person on this thread told the OP to leave his wife. That marriage doesn't sound like it's going through make it because of the age we live in, but he's a grown man and can decide what he wants. Dude asked half a question about smelling like another woman, somebody brought up something from their own situation about tracking which got a response, and then the OP came back and said he had the same problem. It's easier to have a conversation when the story isn't changing with every new post.
To generalize this, when you've got an unreasonable partner who's constantly on you and accusing you of being unfaithful you should consider what's going on inside their heads.
It's ok for men to advocate for their needs even though society teaches us we shouldn't. Either work out an agreement, move on from your marriage, or don't sneak.
If she starts monitoring after marriage, then that really sucks; as there was no warning.
Regarding shailynn's friend....it seems the wife sees things as opposite of what is logical. If she wants/needs a luxiourious lifestyle, it would seem she should be more accommodating, to avoid him leaving. Depends how wealthy he is....some guys have a lot of money, but not so much that alimony and child support would degrade their lifestyle. For others, though, 50% of wealth is still plenty. It's the guys in the former situation that are trapped.
Restaurants are good suggestions. Kinda tough to Uber without taking your phone with you.
A lot of families share locations with parents and kids at all times, especially once the kids learn to drive. I believe in order to see location of kids, you have to share your own location but my family doesn’t do this. Sometimes tracking is a sign of insecurity or control issues, other times it’s just a family thing to keep tabs on the kids, but where one person “opting out” might send up a red flag.
I power off the phone or turn off gps before I leave the hotel or other legitimate restaurant etc and we don’t share location data anyway, I’m just extra paranoid. I track my kids phones, I don’t really watch them but have it turned on in case of emergency and more often because they always lose their devices but I don’t think they can see my location.
Getting a job with some travel requirements has been a good move for my hobby. I can forestall the itch knowing I’ve got a trip coming in the next month or two.
I agree 100% with the advice not to start into deceiving if possible, but there are ways to get by and not embarrass yourself or your family.
For me, I club with low expectations and find the girls who are comfortable getting to know me a little and comfortable in trying to get me off w/out exchanging bodily fluids. It’s my little rule that helps me deal with the hobby w/out too much guilt. Everyone rationalizes their behavior, and for me it’s like getting a massage for relaxation when I get dances from a stripper. Keep it in my budget and leave my feelings at the door, and if any perfume gets in me change into a new shirt or avoid others, including loved ones, until I clean up. To each their own. There’s even a demented dude on here that goes to clubs and is a cuck, letting his wife fuck other dudes. That’s how he deals with life. Quite strange but it’s his life, not one I’d recommend for a real man.
Atm I don't mind them using but I get that most clubs have high ATM fees
Also at a lot of clubs that shit gets 1099'd meaning u must pay taxes on it after the fact. Some clubs will w2 cc transactions so at least they handle the tax paying for ya.
Either way between club taking their cut for cc transactions and taxes, this can effectively cut ur profits in half on a room sale.
you guys crack me up.
do what I did.
DIVORCE... (or stop cheating on her.)
I don't want to make this about Jascoi, but it's known for this type of behavior to be a clumsy and fucking annoying cover up for the accuser's cheating (or desire to cheat, get out of the relationship, etc). Truly miserable people tend to have an external locus of control, which means even if you help them out of their mental rut for a time eventually you'll be needing to constantly reaffirm them (or become the one they blame when they find the next thing to catastrophize about and you're tired of carrying their shit around).
Sorry to divert the topic - but that’s true for any business. You’re just a poor business person if you’re criticizing the use of cards. I’m sure Wal-Mart won’t divulge what they are paying for credit card transactions and they’ve probably negotiated the best possible rates but if Wal-Mart had your attitude they would be out of business in a few months.
** disclaimer - I learned long ago not to use credit card cards in clubs but those businesses who refuse to take cards or charge a fee sre shortsighted and do not understand the finances of modern society
Some businesses are now going the opposite direction, and ONLY accepting cards.
Sorry dude but you walked right into that one.
Please don’t stab me I’m just asking a question.
So ,no, that clearly isn't just taxes or cc fees boys.
So these clubs straight rob us when dudes run cards.
And even someplace else that wasn't so extreme, they still stole another 20% for cc transactions. I know that business do not pay 20% for cc transactions otherwise costco wouldn't have a credit card would they? Lmao
I’d look into filing a complaint
It is more like if the guy insists on cc after I whisper in his ear to do cash I grit my teeth and pretend not to be angry.