During a breather between a couple lap dances the other night, from a nice looking woman probably around 30ish, she started talking about her two teenaged children. This ruined it for me after that I just wasn't quite as interested in having her grind all over me.
Any major mood killers for you guys?
Yea, talking about kids during a LD can be a real buzz kill. Another one that's happened to me from a dancer is something like, "So, how's yer Mom?".
Another funny one that I just thought of (but that's never happened to me) is a dancer saying, "Damn, I just can't seem to get rid of this itch!"
I like it very much to be about the fantasy. Real life can creep back into the conversation once the lap-dancing is done. If the girl starts to talk about bullshit I do not wish to hear I end the dance right there and find someone else.
Nothing turns me off quicker than a girl reaking of BO. I ran into a hot dancer at a club after waiting patiently for her and as soon as her "aura" drifted my way, I couldn't get away fast enough. Ruined the whole night for me. I left shortly afterwards.
Sometimes the conversation can be a mood kiler. I don't mind talking between dances about kids, hobbies, unusual sexual prcolivities. But for me the worst turnoff is getting an air dance in a club where I know mileage is available. And having the girl thinking her dance was great is bewildering.
Well the word was "proclivities" until I typed it.
About 3 years ago, in my favorite club, I was watching a beautiful young black dancer on stage. I would rate her a 9+. As soon as she came off stage they announced a 2 for 1 lap dance and she came right to me and asked if I was up for it. Of course I was. The dance started and she was like a greased pig. Sweating so badly that we just kept slipping and sliding. My pants were soaked. Because she was so beautiful and doing the right moves, I stuck it out. Normally I would have asked for more but instead I told her the truth. "You need to go towel down and cool off after getting off stage". She did not smell bad and apologized. I saw her again a month later and she apologized again and we did some sweet lap dances. Never have seen her again. Damn!
Sweaty, smelling bad, asking or talking about your mother, or her kids, I agree can all be a mood killer when you're getting ready to get a lap dance from her and if you're a guy who thinks like me, you want to think sexy thoughts to get in the mood rather than something else. She can talk or ask about that stuff later if she wants to talk in my opinion. Asking about someone's mother or relatives can be a real quick mood killer as well if one of your relatives was recently in the hospital but you did not want to talk about that during your strip club visit. I often like to enjoy my time in strip clubs and don't want to be reminded about reality unless of course I'm the one who brought it up.
I don't even like to tip a dancer on stage if I see she is all sweaty if I think there is a chance she is going to get me all wet.
Ok this is gross but a girl was tellin me last nite that when she was pregnant and still dancing she'd have to say" dont stimulate my clit it can cause preterm labor" Hows that for a mood killer?
Wow...now there's an "extra" that I don't want in my lap...
I think wondergirl just won the prize! The upsell does it for me every time. "if you want to touch there, it's another $20"...hate that schiet.
Razor stubble anywhere.
How about stubble AND an Adams Apple?
How about the true story that a fav told me about. Her 10yo got stuck in the eye with an electric drill. 3rd surgery coming up, Not much else came up.
Careful wondergrl...you might start exciting certain people on here with that kind of talk...lol...
Agree with many of those listed (talking about their kids, bills, crazy boyfriends... razor stubble around--and below--the bikini line, upselling, drink hustling, etc).
One that hasn't been mentioned is one I hate. When I get an LD and the girl is just going through the motions. When she's staring off into space, rotating between the same 3 positions, or just getting on and grinding the same spot with no change for the entire song or more (chaffing!), and when girls seem to be bouncing off the walls and just climbing all over you, bouncing up and down going way to fast with everything... even during a slow song. I know she's probably doing it unconsciously because she wants to get it over asap and get her $. I hate that. Go slow, take your time, don't bounce, the song is the same length no matter what happens... but if you do it this way, I'll be paying you for more songs, not thinking about whether someones taken my seat at the bar.
You're heading for the LD room and the girl asks for a tip in advance saying, "The bigger the tip, the better the dance." Goodby.
Now I can't help but wonder how many "girls" with Adams Apples work at Wondergirl's club. I might not be too surprised by that in New Orleans or Key West, but New Jersey? And here I was planning to visit.
While one patron was trying to entice me to have a dance, she bent over in front of me and i noticed a string dangling out... waving back and forth like a pendulum. That pretty much killed the mood.
Yeah, that string thing will ruin it every time. The smart dancers know to tuck it inside the kitty. I once was doing a two for one lap dance with one of my favs. I was about to let my hand go under the thong. Witch I had done many times before without objection. Then she says "I don't care but you are going to find a string down there". Oh shit and I still had another song coming.
Where else have you seen that practice FONDL? I'm seeing more and more clubs where that kind of upfront tipping is possible...it's very odd indeed.
I think my favorite might be Shadows about the kid with the drill in their eye...
mr. g., I have seen "advance tipping" in Vegas at Deja Vu. As far as turnoffs, do NOT under any circumstances sing, this is not American Idol, and do not chew gum.
Hows this cause I had to do it at work. Big dude goes in the LD area with me but wont sit down just pushes against me up against the wall. Im like have a seat he ignores me and Ilook down and see he is wearin the work out shorts with the pocket cut out (ala Shadowcat. But of course lacked shadowcats finesse) Anyway there he is pokin out im pinned against the wall and hes like grab it. Now I had one of 2 choices push the panic button or grab it.And now Im kinda pissed. So I grab it give it a good twist hey yelps and I say now listen have a seat and Ill give you a dance but you pull that shit again and Ill twist it like a ballon animal. He bought 4 dances and bought me a bottle of wine. The damn dominatrix in me cant stay quiet.
But in my head that would be a turn offf what do you guys think?
You put him in his place wondergrl...as long as you don't fart on him, it's OK...lol...
Wondergrl, maybe you should do the dominatrix as stage presence.
I did that im retired.
Yes that would be a turn off but I D
I'll try again. Yes that would be a turn off but I do have finesse. They are always considerate and gentle.
well shadowcat from how you describe your "tehcniques" your coy about. This guy was like a flasher on the subway.
"Any major mood killers for you guys?"
Yup. Young guys complaining in a club! LOL
Mood killers:
Dancer scolds you for not buying her a drink, or for not tipping her, or for any other reason.
Dancer starts asking serious questions about your background, for which you have to make up mindless shit because that's none of her damn business and you don't give a damn about discussing your or her life story, you're there to get laps with hot chicks and have some fun.
Air dance.
A dancer who starts psycho-analyzing you. I actually had that before. Black chick, asks me my sign (people still do that???), starts analyzing me, and decides "oh, you're one of THEM" and storms off. Geezus, are you freakin' kidding me?
A chick who starts out the lap telling you she just started working there, and can't believe that some of the dancers there actually have sexual contact with the customers. EEEWWWWWW !!!!!!!!
A chick who starts discussing your wedding ring, and gives you this holier than thou "oh, you're married..." BS.
Dishonest dancer.
Black chick with a huge butt who thinks that what guys really want in a lap dance is for her to back it up to you, and pile-drive your crotch into submission until it gets welts.
Dancer who has no clue how to give a decent HJ, and dry-rubs your dick until it's raw and painful.
Clueless lap dancer who does weird shit that she thinks is sexy but is in fact either just stupid or downright painful, but certainly not sexy, just annoying. Like pinching/tweaking your nipples (BTW ladies, only chicks like nipple play).
Who digs up a 5 year old post? The guy battling for 2nd biggest asshole on the forum.
The SC is a sexual environment and convos should be limited to that area IMO.
Mood killers:
ROBs
dancers that don’t like being touched – I don’t mean the kitty – but boobs and such – makes for a boring LD that I want to be over sooner than later
Mostly just girls who can't, or won't, do a lap dance. Some girls just don't have the skills while others just sit there without any real interaction taking place.