The worst thing to say to a stripper??!!

avatar for Specialj
Specialj
Born in NYC, conceived at Woodstock.
I’ll go first. “I just won the lottery…I have so much money I don’t know what to do with it…can you give me any advice?!”

32 comments

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avatar for Tetradon
Tetradon
2 years ago
I'm almost certain I can't give you herpes.
avatar for etsutwigg222
etsutwigg222
2 years ago
I got all this inheritance money but I still can't find a woman that likes me for me.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
2 years ago
Sometimes, when I get very excited, I lose control of my bowels......
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
2 years ago
When a stripper told me that she was pregnant I actually asked her "Do you know who the father is?" She was quick to reply "My husband".
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
2 years ago
Here’s the keys to my new car.
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
2 years ago
I’m emotionally available…..
avatar for rattdog
rattdog
2 years ago
saying nothing
avatar for whodey
whodey
2 years ago
It's my first time in a strip club so I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do or how much to tip.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
2 years ago
You look just like your mother did at your age
avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan
2 years ago
I love you.
avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan
2 years ago
or will you marry me
avatar for Dolfan
Dolfan
2 years ago
My PIN# is...

hold my wallet while I go to the bathroom
avatar for booty_lover92
booty_lover92
2 years ago
I want you to be my girlfriend
avatar for funonthaside
funonthaside
2 years ago
No thanks...I'm waiting for Ashley.
avatar for Electronman
Electronman
2 years ago
Any idea what this rash is on my cock?
avatar for gobstopper007
gobstopper007
2 years ago
Can we split the cost of the VIP?
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
2 years ago
“You look like my daughter”

“There is no way you’re older than 15/16/17/18. Drink that (alcoholic beverage)”

“Your car is (insert whatever detail that indicates he was watching you earlier)”
avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman
2 years ago
“Is that you or me that stinks so bad?”

Also, any unsolicited advice probably ranks near the top of things not to say.
avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
2 years ago
Things I've heard from nearby at the bar...

"It's been a while. Are you fatter?"
(I actually had to step outside zone of collateral damage for that one.)

Guy: "Did you get a breast reduction?"
Dancer: "Yes."
Guy: "Shit, that's too bad. They don't look as good."
(The dancer walked immediately to the dressing room without saying a word.)

Some guys like strip clubs, while others depend on strip clubs.
avatar for mark94
mark94
2 years ago
I overheard a long conversation where an Uber driver/PL described his day, fare by fare, and complained about his job. The dancer feigned interest. It was painful.
avatar for dha
dha
2 years ago
Come back after I've had a few drinks.
avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl
2 years ago
Are you pregnant?
avatar for Specialj
Specialj
2 years ago
I don’t get paid until tomorrow…can I write you an IOU on my napkin?
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
2 years ago
I’m very active on TUSCL
avatar for Manuellabore
Manuellabore
2 years ago
Maybe you should be paying me
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
2 years ago
It’s my birthday – can I get a free-dance?
[LOL I actually read this somewhere a few years back about some broke mofo in a club; can’t recall if I read it on TUSCL or StripperWeb]
avatar for bang69
bang69
2 years ago
I herd a person at a table next to me say . I just shit my self.
avatar for rickthelion
rickthelion
2 years ago
^
We all believe you bang-ape. The person at the table next to you was Skifredo. Just read what he said above and believe him. ROAR!!!
avatar for datinman
datinman
2 years ago
The ATM just declined my card.
avatar for boomer79
boomer79
2 years ago
A dancer told me the other day that she looked like his dream for the mother of his babies and that if she wasn’t on birth control he’d pay 50 dollars to put his babies inside of her. Needless to say she was mega creeped after she realized he was serious.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
2 years ago
@twentyfive:"You look just like your mother did at your age"

There are two locals that I know of (probably more, but...) that are daughters of former dancers. For one of them, it's a really good damned thing she doesn't look like her mother. Even when she was dancing, she wasn't above a 5. Daughter apparently takes after dad, because I don't see a resemblance. When mom told me that she was her daughter, I had to resist saying exactly that.

The other one is a dead ringer for her mom at that age, and she knows it, and is thankful, because mom is an absolute smoke show. The first time I saw her, she was on stage, and I had to stop and stare for a minute. After she came off stage, she came over and said "you knew my mom, didn't you?" I had to laugh and say yeah.
avatar for dha
dha
2 years ago
Do you smell something funky like fish or provolone?
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