tuscl

The worst thing to say to a stripper??!!

Specialj
Born in NYC, conceived at Woodstock.
I’ll go first. “I just won the lottery…I have so much money I don’t know what to do with it…can you give me any advice?!”

32 comments

  • Tetradon
    a year ago
    I'm almost certain I can't give you herpes.
  • etsutwigg222
    a year ago
    I got all this inheritance money but I still can't find a woman that likes me for me.
  • skibum609
    a year ago
    Sometimes, when I get very excited, I lose control of my bowels......
  • shadowcat
    a year ago
    When a stripper told me that she was pregnant I actually asked her "Do you know who the father is?" She was quick to reply "My husband".
  • shailynn
    a year ago
    Here’s the keys to my new car.
  • Mate27
    a year ago
    I’m emotionally available…..
  • rattdog
    a year ago
    saying nothing
  • whodey
    a year ago
    It's my first time in a strip club so I'm not sure what I'm supposed to do or how much to tip.
  • twentyfive
    a year ago
    You look just like your mother did at your age
  • Dolfan
    a year ago
    I love you.
  • Dolfan
    a year ago
    or will you marry me
  • Dolfan
    a year ago
    My PIN# is...

    hold my wallet while I go to the bathroom
  • booty_lover92
    a year ago
    I want you to be my girlfriend
  • funonthaside
    a year ago
    No thanks...I'm waiting for Ashley.
  • Electronman
    a year ago
    Any idea what this rash is on my cock?
  • gobstopper007
    a year ago
    Can we split the cost of the VIP?
  • nicespice
    a year ago
    “You look like my daughter”

    “There is no way you’re older than 15/16/17/18. Drink that (alcoholic beverage)”

    “Your car is (insert whatever detail that indicates he was watching you earlier)”
  • Huntsman
    a year ago
    “Is that you or me that stinks so bad?”

    Also, any unsolicited advice probably ranks near the top of things not to say.
  • Call.Me.Ishmael
    a year ago
    Things I've heard from nearby at the bar...

    "It's been a while. Are you fatter?"
    (I actually had to step outside zone of collateral damage for that one.)

    Guy: "Did you get a breast reduction?"
    Dancer: "Yes."
    Guy: "Shit, that's too bad. They don't look as good."
    (The dancer walked immediately to the dressing room without saying a word.)

    Some guys like strip clubs, while others depend on strip clubs.
  • mark94
    a year ago
    I overheard a long conversation where an Uber driver/PL described his day, fare by fare, and complained about his job. The dancer feigned interest. It was painful.
  • dha
    a year ago
    Come back after I've had a few drinks.
  • ilbbaicnl
    a year ago
    Are you pregnant?
  • Specialj
    a year ago
    I don’t get paid until tomorrow…can I write you an IOU on my napkin?
  • Papi_Chulo
    a year ago
    I’m very active on TUSCL
  • Manuellabore
    a year ago
    Maybe you should be paying me
  • Papi_Chulo
    a year ago
    It’s my birthday – can I get a free-dance?
    [LOL I actually read this somewhere a few years back about some broke mofo in a club; can’t recall if I read it on TUSCL or StripperWeb]
  • bang69
    a year ago
    I herd a person at a table next to me say . I just shit my self.
  • rickthelion
    a year ago
    ^
    We all believe you bang-ape. The person at the table next to you was Skifredo. Just read what he said above and believe him. ROAR!!!
  • datinman
    a year ago
    The ATM just declined my card.
  • boomer79
    a year ago
    A dancer told me the other day that she looked like his dream for the mother of his babies and that if she wasn’t on birth control he’d pay 50 dollars to put his babies inside of her. Needless to say she was mega creeped after she realized he was serious.
  • georgmicrodong
    a year ago
    @twentyfive:"You look just like your mother did at your age"

    There are two locals that I know of (probably more, but...) that are daughters of former dancers. For one of them, it's a really good damned thing she doesn't look like her mother. Even when she was dancing, she wasn't above a 5. Daughter apparently takes after dad, because I don't see a resemblance. When mom told me that she was her daughter, I had to resist saying exactly that.

    The other one is a dead ringer for her mom at that age, and she knows it, and is thankful, because mom is an absolute smoke show. The first time I saw her, she was on stage, and I had to stop and stare for a minute. After she came off stage, she came over and said "you knew my mom, didn't you?" I had to laugh and say yeah.
  • dha
    a year ago
    Do you smell something funky like fish or provolone?
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