Why I never worry about ROBs

rickdugan
Verified and Certifiable Super-Reviewer
When I go to any club, worrying about a ROB is the last thing on my mind. The club may be her workplace, but it's my playground. I'm one of the most relaxed people you'll see in any club. I don't feel remotely defensive because I don't have to.

Why do I feel this way? Simple. Because I am so naturally in control of my own space and experiences.

There is one commonality to pretty much every ROB story - it required the guy to willingly cough up the money. Sure maybe she pressured him, or made promises that she didn't keep, or she overcounted, or led him on, etc., but in the end, he lost the money because he made the choice to actively handed it over to her.

Now one might throw a pickpocket into the mix as an example of a ROB who doesn't need active customer acquiescence, but how often does that truly happen? In the easily 1,000+ nights I've spent in strip clubs over two decades, I've encountered this a grand total of once. I don't think it's terribly common for any number of reasons.

Maybe it comes so easy for me since I'm long past the point of being fazed by dramatic noises from females, IDK. I'm nice to everyone until it's time not to be, but I'm not afraid of conflict, including negative reactions to rejection. IMHO any guy who is intimidated by, or resentful of, girls in their underwear (thanks to 25 for the gift that keeps on giving with that phrase) should seek another source of entertainment.

Now this all may sound a bit self-congratulatory and maybe it is, but the takeaway from this is simple: Be in control of yourself and you never have to worry about ROBs. This obviously includes things like not handing over large sums of money upfront, but perhaps even more important is the emotional self-control necessary to use sound judgment and calmly weather manufactured female drama.

18 comments

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RockAllNight
2 years ago
In many years and probably over a thousand encounters, the only times I felt I paid for more than I received, I was far too drunk to know better. Who’s fault was that?

Mine, of course.
Jimmybigtits
2 years ago
Rick I agree with that. Early on I got taken by ROBs from time to time. But back then I was just out of a divorce, acting like a pussy, wanting to be liked, and thought if I was just a sweet man I'd get laid. I was playing more by civvie rules. It was MY fault. A real man admits his mistakes and learns from them.

A woman at a club a couple months ago offered myle a blow job for $500 OTC. I laughed. She said "What's wrong you are too poor to afford the best blow job of your life?". ROBs will often think you are a sucker and overcharge or assault your manhood by challenging the size of your wallet.

The going rate for OTC here is $200. She was a decent looking MILF.

I told her "No I can pay you $500/month. But I want full sex for a couple hours twice per month.". She laughed. Later that night she came back and accepted. Then I took control and told her exactly what I wanted in the first session to make her my regular.

What I learned long ago is that to smoke out a ROB you have to end the negotiation on your terms with you in control. And if she is a bad fuck or does something other than promised on the first date she's not getting a second
rickdugan
2 years ago
@Rock: +1. Shit happens. I'm not saying that I never over-tip a girl, or that my instincts don't fail me once in a while and I end up spending a bit of money on a girl who is less than I hoped, etc. But the occasional misfire comes with the turf. And in many cases she spent time entertaining me while she built up to the sale, so there was some value to it in any event.

What I do avoid is becoming some girl's big payday unless I'm happy with how things went. This is a function of everything I posted above, most notably self control. For example, knowing when to walk away instead of throwing good money after bad can be tough for some, but as many of us know it's critical in keeping small losses from becoming big ones.
rickdugan
2 years ago
@Jimmy: IMHO you highlighted one of the truest realities of dealing with strippers in almost any club anywhere: Almost any stripper can exhibit so-called ROB tendencies when she smells weakness. They take their clothes off and rub on guys for a living - very few are going to have qualms about trying to relieve a foolish guy of a wallet full of cash.

Another truth in your comments is that we all pay some tuition. I'll readily admit that I did, champagne bottles and credit cards included. Thankfully my education ramped up quickly enough that I didn't do too much damage.
psycho_trick
2 years ago
great thread. i don't worry about robs either despite it being an integral part of clubbing life. vigilance is second nature by now.
i do feel a responsiblity to pay the expensive acquired wisdom forward to cut the learning curve for all unsuspecting baby-pls.

Hank Moody
2 years ago
I was going to use the ‘tuition’ analogy as well. I wrote about my education in a Vegas CH3 review some years ago. Cost me several hundred dollars in unfulfilled promises but I learned. I’ll still sometimes overtip or be left feeling that the option I chose wasn’t the best, but I can take that occasionally. I don’t consider that a ROB just someone I won’t spend money on again. I also agree that the mantra to ‘not be afraid of girls in their underwear’ is good (and very funny) advice. 👍🏼
Tetradon
2 years ago
"There is one commonality to pretty much every ROB story - it required the guy to willingly cough up the money."

YES. So much this.
Muddy
2 years ago
Not everyone does strip clubs like you do though. I've become more averse to VIP's over time just because of the risk involved. Hey just read some of those Manhattan VIP horror stories I cringe, that Rick you yourself been through. But some guys on here don't have the take home option it's VIP or bust and a ROB can really make it shitty for them. I do agree on a lot other stuff in the OP.
shailynn
2 years ago
Is this all about nicespice trying to take all the leftover breadsticks at Olive Garden home instead of dividing them equally Rick?
rickdugan
2 years ago
@Muddy: I hear you on Manhattan VIPs, but that's it's own unique animal. The only way to avoid being ripped off in a Manhattan VIP room is to never go into a Manhattan VIP room. Even if you get what you want, you're going to pay a fortune for it.

I'm not sure that this is representative of what most people are dealing with here on this nationwide board. A more customary example is a place with some minimum timed amount for $150-250 or so plus a negotiated tip. In that situation, IMHO the answer is to shop as carefully as you can, but be willing to walk if it's not going well. It sucks to have a misfire and lose the room fee, but it also sucks for her as she's usually only getting a small % of the cut on the fee itself. If, however you paid her the full tip upfront because she insisted on it, then that's on you as much as her.

Dolfan
2 years ago
I don't worry about ROB's per se, and I don't fear the conflict or being bullied by a girl in her underwear (again hat tip to 25), but I don't enjoy or crave it either. I'm not out front sweating bullets, or trying to interrogate a potential dance partner to determine how to avoid her as some other thread was about. I accept that occasionally I'm going to run into an unscrupulous dancer, bartender, waitress or something who is going to mistake me for an easy mark and try to get over on me in some way. When it happens, I address it. I don't let it ruin my night, but it does at least to some extent taint the experience. Certainly when clubs develop a reputation for having lots of this, I avoid them.
twentyfive
2 years ago
I don’t worry about things that don’t affect me, I paid my tuition and learned my lessons well, is she’s capable of pulling one over on me or some of you more experienced guys, I’d say well done
Papi_Chulo
2 years ago
As I’ve posted in the past, strip-club are places of vice and lots of fast-$$$ flowing around – there will often be a certain amount of shady-people from staff to dancers to custies so the potential for getting ROBed will often be there, in some clubs more than others. Add to this that many SCers are often inexperienced SCers and that SCs function differently that just about any other business the avg person is used to dealing with on day-to-day basis, this adds to the ROBish environment in many clubs (analogous to tourists that get ripped-off in tourist-areas b/c they don’t know the environment).

Most experienced SCers have gotten burned at some point and usually take steps to mitigate that from happening in the future – but at the end of the day part of the SC model is based on the “honor system” for lack of a better word; i.e. based on the custy getting what he paid for or the dancer getting paid for what she provided.

One can mitigate getting ripped-off but not eliminate it 100% - there are times where one has to eat a room-fee etc – and their at times one will be in a position where it’s a “he-said she-said” and depending on the club one either has to pay the ROB or just have to leave the club and potentially never return (often times the club/staff is not purview to what was agreed-to/not-agreed-to and it can be a crapshoot whether the club takes her side or stays neutral).

IMO it’s a bit disingenuous to state one doesn’t worry about ROBs if one rarely does ITC things like VIP or get dances – if one avoids these things then of course very-little to worry-about – but if one routinely partakes in ITC VIPs and/or dances, then it can be an issue especially in certain types of clubs.

SCing while worrying about getting ROBed of course can take away from the fun – but in certain clubs the ROB-factor is def warranted especially if one partakes in a lot of ITC activity – at the very-least one needs to be aware of the potential and adjust accordingly based on the type of club one is hitting and the type/level of “ITCing” one is partaking in.
Icee Loco (asshole)
2 years ago
I don't consider any girl a rob unless she outright pics your pocket or steals something.

Most on here just talk about buyers remorse and their own lack of common sense coupled with social retardation.
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
^ I agree.

Personally I have never brought any girl through a preliminary makeout session and not had her totally crazy for my cock.

SJG
georgmicrodong
2 years ago
@rick: "I hear you on Manhattan VIPs, but that's it's own unique animal. The only way to avoid being ripped off in a Manhattan VIP room is to never go into a Manhattan VIP room. Even if you get what you want, you're going to pay a fortune for it."

This is almost exactly the case with PT's here in Louisville. Yes, there are some guys who "get their money's worth" (except that it costs insane money, so not really "worth" it at all) in VIP there, but the vast majority of girls will take your $1,500 per hour fee, and delay, excuse, delay, excuse, delay, excuse, delay, excuse until time is up.
rickmacrodong
2 years ago
Icee you have a pro dancer bias and have admitted you think its fine for dancers to rob clients.
If you promise someone a service for money and take the money but don’t deliver the service, that’s scamming And fraud. Robs only get away with it cause prostitution is illegal so customers cant take legal action or any action against a lapdance scammer.
Actually its likely that robs can even get away with something like telling you you can touch their ass ir boobs, and then not let you do it once you pay.
This is all considered scam, fraud, something people with no morals do.
An honest john and honest hooker are superior to a scammer. It doesnt matter who’s more desperate, needs more money etc.
san_jose_guy
2 years ago
BTE, you can't deal with the women that way. It never really is P4P and it never really could be. You have to get personal with them and let the money be just a good will and care gesture and get her to want to engage with you sexually.

SJG
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