Jimmybigtits

Those long fake eyelashes that look like a caterpillar taking a shit on their face. I just have a visceral reaction. I can't stand it.

Not the bartender with the gun slinging bounty hunter BF but another.

So I'm frequenting this club a couple times per week and she asks me out. I jokingly asks if she wants money and…

I don't like to slow down or pull out so when I'm close and I need to distract myself here are things I've filled my brain with to delay the money shot.

1. UFOs. I…