OT: How Toxic is Too Toxic? Is TUSCL There Yet?

37 comments

• twentyfive

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  2 years ago

  It’s fixable but founder doesn’t seem to give a shit, so it just continues.
• Hank Moody

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  2 years ago

  Wall, I think your observation is correct. I think the cause is the lifecycle. Ordinarily, a forum that’s been around for 20+ years and has members who have been around nearly that long and are still participating, along with a constantly growing subscriber base, would be considered something of a marvel. When I look at the wealth of information on these pages I cannot help but appreciate its significance. That it is regarding a topic of a taboo nature makes it all the more impressive. Unfortunately, a lot of that specialness gets lost in the familiarity of friends and enemies. We’ve been here so long and post so frequently on so many topics that just the sight of someone’s avatar or screen name causes a visceral reaction without even reading the content of what was posted. “_______ made me mad one time so I’m gonna shit on him whenever he posts” happens all too often.
• psycho_trick

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  2 years ago

  Too many cucked/woke responses now. 'those poor strippers' 'strippers are peeple tooooo' No, they're not. They're con artists. Always. The Tuscl I used to know armed PLs and noobs with solid defenses and precautions, not riding the fence with sensitivity. Go put on a g-string and post with the girls at reddit ffs. Personal attacks are still counter-productive. Voice your pro-PL opinion and move on. Stand and monger together.
• twentyfive

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  2 years ago

  @Jimmy I don’t think that’s a very good analogy there are three common posters that post for the express purpose of riling everyone, my opinion is founder likes the drama and thinks it’s good for him, I disagree with that, there was a perfect tool the two way block, for the short time it was available there was very little flaming going on, the second it was removed everything went to hell in a handbasket.
• Muddy

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  2 years ago

  IDK I would like to everyone on here hold the line and ignore certain trolls. I don't plan on having those members who respond on ignore but it turns threads in to spam when they get into these long back and forths. They are just getting what they want when you respond be it positive or negative. Once nobody talks to them anymore it won't be as fun for them. I know some say that won't work but you know why don't we try it, definitely haven't done that yet.
• twentyfive

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  2 years ago

  ^ got to tell you Muddy I tried that for a month but it didn’t work, I could give you corroboration from two other members it wouldn’t matter it doesn’t work here.
• wallanon

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  2 years ago

  Thanks for weighing in. Some of the TUSCLers I thought had VIP status actually don't, so I might also send this around as a PM. Some of the other issues over years got talked out via the forums (voting on reviews, bring back the top lists, etc) so maybe there's a middle ground here that the board regulars can agree on. Splitting out the politics got a lot of the negativity off the main forum, but like McNulty said the contempt is starting to bleed into even the most mundane topics. Take a thread like can-you-tell-me-everyplace-I-can-get-laid-in-orange-county-but-only-with-white-chicks. That should be an easy no thanks (or maybe even a sorry officer) that fades away quickly but instead spirals into a flame war. It had the TJ angle because of San Diego, but otherwise is the same kind of stuff we used to routinely shrug off. I've half jokingly put out the idea of yet another splinter board, but what kind of forum are we going to have if asking about the weather turns into an argument?
• shadowcat

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  2 years ago

  After 20+ years on here, I have pretty much burned out. I now read what interests me and just ignore the rest. Many others that have felt the same way have just dropped out completely.
• Muddy

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  2 years ago

  I’d like to see a test run to see how this site works if we knighted a PL like a PaulDrake or a Subra who have moderating experience just for a month and see how it goes. Trial run kind of thing.
• Tetradon

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  2 years ago

  This place is what it is. I've given up trying to change it. In the end it's an obscure message board for what I wouldn't even call one of my top hobbies, and has little impact on the rest of my life.
• wallanon

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  2 years ago

  "it's still for <50 people" founder and maybe a handful of other people know what the actual traffic is for the site. There's probably more people lurking than it seems, just like there's probably a reason most of the new faces are just people looking for an easy button to get off at their local clubs. This wasn't a thread to ask anyone to fix the forums. It was really just to ask how you all thought things were going. A lot of people posting here on the boards sound angry and miserable, so considering this is a hobby site it seemed worth putting a question out there about it.
• Jb1212

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  2 years ago

  This site is toxic for new members, certain members gatekeep and roast those of us that want to belong and can contribute as well. Community based sites should welcome new members and show them how the community works. Just being a troll on each thread or review doesn’t help. Corrective criticism is what will work. But without mods to facilitate toxic comments, the community will remain the same if not worsen.
• docsavage

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  2 years ago

  It could be worse than it is. I visit unmoderated political discussion websites and you see a lot of racial or religious slurs, neo-Nazi types talking about how the Holocaust never happened, calls for a race war and so on. I think the owner of this website may do something to keep them off of here in the political section, but I also think that the type of guys who go to strip clubs tend to be more the live and let live type of guys. Someone who does something that many people consider socially unacceptable, going to strip clubs, tends to be more understanding and tolerant of other nonconformist types.
• wallanon

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  2 years ago

  Hi Jb1212. Before this gets out of hand, thanks for speaking up. Other longtime board members can speak for themselves, and you got your answer about why people who lead off with certain types of questions don't always get the answer they're looking for. I suggested that you contact TUSCLers one on one to see if you get a different response, and that's still my take on it. I also saw your comment about constructive criticism, and when I have a minute I'll send you a couple of thoughts as a PM. Your posts probably would've been skipped over, but I clicked into one of them because it looked like a duplicate of another you'd just posted. Then I clicked on the other one. Then I clicked on some others to see what else was going on. And then I posted a thread about it. Welcome to TUSCL. Hope you get something out of being here. And that you choose to contribute regularly. A review is a good start, because a lot of new faces don't even do that before posting a bunch of questions.
• wallanon

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  2 years ago

  But just so it's clear, I didn't start a thread about how you (Jb1212) were treated. Or really any of the new people. That's its own issue, and two TUSCLers went over to Reddit to create another forum where the expectations are a little different. People who take the time to read over the TUSCL boards before posting should already have an idea of how their post is going to land. This thread was put here to talk about why the core TUSCLers keep attacking each other day in and day out.
• Hank Moody

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  2 years ago

  @25 - My comment was less about SKG Icee or cjkent or whoever you meant. There’s a much broader base of regular posters who can’t help but chime in to shit on a post or name call without stopping for a minute to respond thoughtfully to the substance of a post. Or people who inject trigger words or politics into strip club topics. It’s a fact of life for the board at this point. Icee for example used to post interesting topics that would get derailed just because of his adversarial history. I think that’s what wall was asking about. Crap on someone if they post something crappy, not because of their history. Otherwise it’s just tiresome.
• twentyfive

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  2 years ago

  Fair enough, I have been guilty of crapping on crappy posters, in my defense I don't look to start a flame war but there are some people that are so easily triggered it's damn near impossible not to, ie: I have the littl dry shrub on ignore, but occasionally I'll respond, just for shits and giggles.
• Hank Moody

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  2 years ago

  Yeah, I get it. There are people I don’t like who I either have on ignore or just ignore by skipping over their posts. There are also posters who when I see their names I expect to read something I find stupid or objectionable and to your point, my expectations are often accurate and I respond. I’ve stayed out of the political forum and that’s helped but the main forum has its share of flame wars.
• ilbbaicnl

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  2 years ago

  Yes, I often find others to be boring and annoying. And others often find me to be boring and annoying. Just how it is. The ignore feature on TUSCL discussions is the best way I've seen to minimize the problem. What forum has anyone been on where things are better? I got banned from stripperweb for disrespecting the moderator. The PL moderator, not the stripper moderator. Kindof like when people get arrested for resisting arrest. You may say we could have better moderation. But it never works. It's like when people say they want Communism, 'cept the good kind, not like how it's every been done before.
• Jb1212

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  2 years ago

  @wallanon I posted if I should go to OC or San Diego, I’m in between. Everyone said go tj or OC. So I read reviews for OC clubs and they seemed to be mostly Latina girls from what I read. I’m not really into Latina girls. So the post are similar but I never got an answer. So if I have to go to sc on my own to find out, this site won’t be of much use to me. Maybe I’ll stay on as just a reviewer.
• wallanon

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  2 years ago

  You got an answer, which was to reach out to locals who'd posted reviews. I haven't been to an OC club in years and don't remember them, but why you seem to think the only way to receive an answer of value is on the open board is coming across as picky. When I want to know something about a club or town, unless I want to make it a big discussion I send a PM. For example, I randomly noticed a TUSCLer posted something about twins at his local club. Twins are on my hobby bucket list (I've already had sisters and I'm not a freak like someone I won't name who's had mother-daughter strippers lol) so you bet I sent a question about that off board.
• twentyfive

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  2 years ago

  ^ Or you could develop a thicker skin and participate, it's not necessary to pay attention to the loudest voices.
• twentyfive

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  2 years ago

  ^^^Personally I don't respond to PMs from unknowns asking for information, but depending on the tone and type I do occasionally respond in the open forum, I don't however give information about any individual I might know, or divulge anything that in my opinion might cause some sort of problem for dancers or anyone else for that matter.
• Jb1212

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  2 years ago

  Pm might work for active and recent reviews. I just was asking a clubs in particular not just an area. I’ll try PMs and just try a few clubs out and try to leave my own reviews to help.
• nicespice

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  2 years ago

  My vantage point is now vs 2018, which was when I first noticed the discussion board. It seems like there has always been personal attacks since then? But I guess maybe there is a bit more anxiety in people’s writing styles now vs then. Just imo
• gammanu95

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  2 years ago

  No disrespect to Founder, but the most toxic people are those who have the strongest ties to it. For fuck's sake, it's a bunch of perverts and degenerates trying to find the best mileage, cheapest extras, and/or achieve the fastest ejaculation into their pants. Use it for that, have fun with it, but don't think that anyone offline truly gives a fuck that someone got called a porch monkey, accused of being a pedophile, or is planning a new counterculture pseudo-cult.
• wallanon

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  2 years ago

  "Use it for that" That's the point. It's probably a little more useful when the threads can breathe a little and not spiral into in-fighting on unrelated topics. Whatever value gets taken from that (or not) is obviously up to each of you.
• MackTruck

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  2 years ago

  Why da hate on trolls? Troll lives matter! I da Kang of da trolls
• gammanu95

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  2 years ago

  This is professional level flame war: [view link]
• BumHip

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  2 years ago

  As long as SCRUB is allowed to post, it is clear FOUNDER could not care less about the content on UTSCL.
• PinkSugarDoll

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  2 years ago

  I don’t understand how some people can be blocked from the site, then make a new profile and we all know it’s them, but it’s ok for the new profile to stay around…. I left this site for about a year because of jerks. 🤷🏼‍♀️ I hope to not be part of the drama. I ignored someone today for my own sanity and it feels good already, yayyy. 🎉
• drewcareypnw

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  2 years ago

  @psd: I agree with Scrub, good for you. I blocked a couple of members (Icey, SJG) and it improved my experience as well. Though it is a bit weird to watch folks piling on to someone who I can't see in the room... makes me think of ghosts at a séance.
• nicespice

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  2 years ago

  I’m okay with toxicity (a lot of the internet is like that anyways). But a lot of recent posts have just been so inane. But it fluctuates. Sometimes posts are interesting, and sometimes not.
• ilbbaicnl

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  2 years ago

  Yeah well someday you'll be old and senile like us, and inane will be all you have left too.
• drewcareypnw

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  2 years ago

  @nice: there is indeed a lot of inanity here on tuscl. At times I find myself compelled to challenge it and at other times I just ignore, thinking "what's the point of debating that?" There are a lot of fringe lines of thinking here that wouldn't be tolerated in any other corner of the internet. This is good in a way, bc without that tolerance, where would we be allowed to talk about ldk, extras, the precise definition of sex work, etc. On the other hand... the tone here is very unproductive at times. I also think that some people find themselves marginalized even here (mostly for their behavior) and lash out accordingly.
• skibum609

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  2 years ago

  The inane stupidity, the anger, the rigid beliefs, hostility, the unreasonableness, seems to bother a lot of people here. This is the internet. It only means something if you want it to mean something. Stupid interpersonal bullshit like this is what I do for a living. Be happy to buy at least 90% of the people here a cold one.
• Tetradon

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  2 years ago

  @Skibum, I don't know why people expect differently here. I told someone in a PM who got their dander up that this is the fucking internet, where we're all 275 pounds of solid muscle with a 10 inch cock, and no one faces consequences for their actions, so grow a thicker skin.