Jobs you would never ever do

I agree, I dump a load on da bums

Why does the councilman even care, Jesus Christ

I couldn’t be a police officer. I think there are all kinds of people in every job, good people and bad people. Police, it doesn’t matter what they do, they are never doing the right thing according to someone. Pretty stupid time to be living.

^ Ever notice how Arizona Turd Blossom always brings the conversation -- any conversation -- around to homosexual acts? Interesting obsession for someone on a website devoted to strip clubs.

I remember driving home late one night from the Penthouse Club in Detroit. I felt hungry and so I stopped at a Popeye's on Telegraph Road. The workers were behind bullet proof glass, and there was a turn table on which you placed your money and received your food. No way you could shoot the staff. The bullet proof glass was there for a reason.

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Do you know IceeLoco Doesn’t like blow jobs?

Answer: he doesn’t like any job.

I would not want to have the job of Jen Psaki. She has to spend her time defending a president who has dropped to a 37% approval rating in the latest polls.

“ I remember driving home late one night from the Penthouse Club in Detroit. I felt hungry and so I stopped at a Popeye's on Telegraph Road. The workers were behind bullet proof glass, and there was a turn table on which you placed your money and received your food. No way you could shoot the staff. The bullet proof glass was there for a reason.”

• yep I’ve been in that very Popeyes for the same reason. Amazing, they have to hand you dipping sauce packets through a bulletproof turn style.

For me it would probably be a nurse. I actually would t mind being a nurse or a nurse anesthetist (they make excellent money) but there’s no way because I’d pass out every time I’d have to draw someone’s blood.

I knew a good ol farm boy who grew up jacking off horses and pigs for breeding.

Meat processing plant American military aka killer for hire Gay porn star

I’d never be a maintenance worker at McDonalds after CrazyJoe uses the shitter.

I’d never get into politics either.

A male turkey's reproductive organ is on its chest. In the US, food turkeys' breasts have gotten so big that this organ isn't long enough to reach the female's apparatus.

The job I don't want is to be the guy jerking off turkeys so that the females can be inseminated.

I’ll never be an airline attendant. Because they have a height requirement to be at least 5’5

^Neither could I; not only am I 5'2", but I need xanax to fly. 🤷‍♀️

I actually wouldn't do 90% (or more) of the jobs out there. I have learned that I require a job where I not only make very good money, but I can more or less make my own schedule.

Men's room attendant.

Great now I have this song stuck in my head m.youtube.com

Money sweeper in a strip club might as well be castrated

@heaving

“Unpaid tuscl troll.

Luckily demand for this position is high enough that I would never have to do it.”

I think you mean ‘supply.’ There is very little demand, and then only for the few trolls who are clever and can resist board bombing.

I forgot one - Librarian in the San Jose library.

I’ve heard the keyboard on the free internet access computer is very sticky - and the internet cookies are all goat porn sites.

As a kid, I had to work in a grocery store. One day I had to fill in for the cat who worked the salad bar. Miserable experience for me. I had to spend the day with a thick coat on, standing on two feet all day in the freezer, chopping salad, stacking fruit. Lonely gig. Nobody really talks to you. Depressing for a kid like me at that time...

And although I've done it a handful of times already: wedding DJ. I quickly realized I don't care enough for absolute strangers to DJ their wedding. Too many headaches. Too unpredictable: like the wedding cake and food is stuck in traffic, they won't make it now I gotta improvise? I gotta entertain a room where 85% of the room NEVER goes out or goes clubbing and every line dance is the first time they've ever seen it? I gotta hold their hand thru the whole wedding? I'll pass...

^^^ not to mention there’s probably a guy who always talks about starting an organization that attempts to take a shower in the drinking water fountain everyday and eats all the cookies during kids story time.

Cop. I support the police but I could never be one. For a lot of reason but especially now when every politician and even police brass will fuck the cop on the beat over to cover their ass and appease the radicals.

Plus I could never enforce laws I don’t believe in. Cops have to enforce whatever lame law the lawmaker/politicians come up with.

Driver of one of those pumping vacuum trucks. Whether pumping out septic tanks or rancid fats from restaurant grease traps, that's some foul shit that is going to linger in your sinuses long after your day is done.

One no one thought of. A fluff boy on gay porn sets 😂😂😂😭

There's a lot. Most of them require a level of patience or self-restraint that I have no desire to develop. Police officer. Teacher (K-12). Psychiatrist/psychologist (we refer out to those, wouldn't even want those patients in my waiting rooms).

Politics. If you lived in or followed Illinois politics in 2004, you may remember how the Chicago Tribune sued for Jim Ryan's divorce records so they could destroy his Senate bid and get Barry Hussein elected. After Ryan dropped out, there was a lot of talk about former Bears coach Mike Ditka taking over the Republican ticket. Ultimately, he decided against, saying he was too likely to punch out another Senator during a disagreement. The rest is history, but I agree. My principles are too strong and my bullshit tolerance too low to enter politics.

With all respect to MackTruck... (I'm sure his shit truck is a lot more sanitary and probably automated to some extent than this):

Every year we go on a camping trip to the Adirondacks. The camp sites are all on islands, only accessible by boat, and every one has an old fashioned wooden shithouse where the crap goes into a deep hole in the ground.

They have this special boat that looks something like a rowboat but at least 5 times bigger and has a motor. There's a big shit-sucking machine and long hose that a guy has to drag by hand, shove down the outhouse hole and suck out all the human waste. Most of the shit-shacks are about 50 - 100 feet away from the water and sometimes up a steep hill, and the hose is about 4" diameter, so the job isn't only disgusting, it looks like genuinely hard work. When that boat is nearby, you can smell the stink from halfway across the lake.

Plus, there's obviously a second part of the job, which is emptying out that big shit machine - I never saw that part of the process. On top of all that, every shithouse gets moved every couple years, I assume for environmental reasons? So somebody has to dig a new hole and move the shitter to the new spot. It ain't like a parking lot... it's all hills, woods and rocks. No way he does that without getting shit all over himself.

Hand and Blow. Scrub and I think alike from time to time!

@nicespice: Where do you get that 5'5" minimum height requirement for flt. attendants from ? Not every airline has published minimum height for FA's. Those that don't have reach test requirements.(must demonstrate ability to reach overhead compartment which can be anywhere from 72" to 82" high depending on aircraft). A sampling of height requirements show 5'2" for major airlines American and Southwest, and 5'0" for low cost airlines Spirit and Frontier. I suspect that regional jet operators such as Mesa Airlines, Air Wisconsin, etal would be more lenient on height minimums.

One factor that could be a problem for some dancers is that flight attendants are 1 of the employee groups subject to DOT drug testing regulations to include initial hire screening, and ongoing random drug tests.

Strip club staff, I would never want to do this.

Owner would be okay, but not any staff because staff could be fired and so they have no real power. Girls will look down on you.

SJG