Is it me?
RustyLlewellyn
Tagline? Um ... You're it?
This could be lengthy, so apologies in advance.
At the outset, let me confess that I struggle with mental illness, with particular regard to self-esteem. (That is, I don't have any.) I won't turn y'all into my therapist or anything, but it's an important detail here. (And yes, I'm open about it. If it helps someone understand me, or someone come to grips with their own struggles, great!) But please, as open as I am about it, it's a sensitive issue for me, so ... maybe no trolling on this one? I'd appreciate it.
Okay. I've been to (and been a regular at) SCs across this great country, from nice places in the South to grungy places in the Midwest to high end clubs here in the City of Angels. And never has any dancer even hinted at the prospect of "extras". Not once.
So ... Is it me? I know I'm not much to look at (see above self-esteem issues), so is that it? Do I not know how to broach the subject and invite those conversations? Am I going at the wrong time, or to the wrong clubs? Do I give off the wrong vibe (and, if so, how do I present the right vibe)? Ladies, how do you read a customer and know he's open to suggestion?
I don't know if knowing an answer will change my behavior, but I would prefer to know why, if that makes sense. Thanks.
At the outset, let me confess that I struggle with mental illness, with particular regard to self-esteem. (That is, I don't have any.) I won't turn y'all into my therapist or anything, but it's an important detail here. (And yes, I'm open about it. If it helps someone understand me, or someone come to grips with their own struggles, great!) But please, as open as I am about it, it's a sensitive issue for me, so ... maybe no trolling on this one? I'd appreciate it.
Okay. I've been to (and been a regular at) SCs across this great country, from nice places in the South to grungy places in the Midwest to high end clubs here in the City of Angels. And never has any dancer even hinted at the prospect of "extras". Not once.
So ... Is it me? I know I'm not much to look at (see above self-esteem issues), so is that it? Do I not know how to broach the subject and invite those conversations? Am I going at the wrong time, or to the wrong clubs? Do I give off the wrong vibe (and, if so, how do I present the right vibe)? Ladies, how do you read a customer and know he's open to suggestion?
I don't know if knowing an answer will change my behavior, but I would prefer to know why, if that makes sense. Thanks.
53 comments
I travel a lot and have found that, the more you act like you've been in the situation before, the more comfortable the dancers are, and you get offered extras. If you act nervous, they may thing you are wearing a wire or something.
So, bottom line, some level of personal confidence helps make dancers open up a bit more. I think that is a general life trick. I have worked in hospitals for a very long time and always found that if you act like you know where you are going, nobody stops to question you. Act like you've been in the situation and I think you will have better luck.
RustyLlewellyn
January 29, 2022
I'm taking the GF to Vegas in a few weeks, and I'd love to find a club where some dancers would show us a good time (meant literally and possibly euphemistically, depending on how into it the GF would find herself).
Suggestions for a SC that's couple-friendly?
Even w/ clubs “that have extras”; not all extras-clubs are the same – some are more-subtle about-it; and a few are kinda brothels.
Thru my years on TUSCL, there have been many comments of guys that had clubbed for years and didn’t know about extras or thought they couldn’t be had.
The easiest way is to go to certain clubs/areas – e.g. Detroit-suburbs and South Florida are pretty-much sure things.
In clubs/areas where it’s more subtle; sometimes one has to be the one to ask and be proactive about it.
If you really wanna experience extras, then take a trip to where they are pretty-much a sure thing; and this is where TUSCL comes in w.r.t. finding the right clubs – once you get some experience under your belt you’ll be able to do better in the extras-department – but even then, strip-clubbing is not an exact science and it’s often more of an art than a science that one learns w/ time and IMO especially thru TUSCL since there are a good # of guys on here w/ a lot of SCing experience.
It rarely has to do w/ the custy – as a custy one’s success is usually linearly-proportional to one’s ability and willingness to spend – that is by far the #1 thing almost all dancers look for - you just need to zero-in on the right-clubs via some TUSCL research and read some reviews to get familiarized w/ those clubs.
Cops don't spend weeks to months infiltrating every back woods strip club for a BJ bust. Plus most undercover cops are arrogant pricks.
If you're in a legit extras club and you come off as nervous or shy, trust me, there are girls who will make it their mission to walk you down the path of empty wallets. (As long as you're polite and respectful to them, which it seems you are.)
And forget about your looks. If that was a factor, most of these clubs would go out of business.
I say spend some time reading reviews for your area. Look for the small privately owned dive joints where extras are discussed or implied in the reviews. Avoid the high-end glitzy spots because while extras may be available, they will come at a very high price. And the fast-paced environment might cause girls to target what they perceive to be quick, easy money rather than spend a little time sort of helping you along at first.
I've been propositioned a lot. I don't really think of it as anything to be happy about. Uts not what I'm into.
In my view, there are several items necessary for extras to be had. You must research to determine if extras are common in the club. You must ask before going for a dance. You must have a relaxed regular guy vibe - not a stiff cop type of vibe.
If you go to a club that is known to allow extras, then you chat with a dancer before you go to get dances, to learn if she will do extras with you. You also get prices before going to the back room.
Remember, if you are paying for dances, then the dancer is making money. Why would she offer up extras - unless she’s in a bad economic situation? Asking politely about extras won’t offend the dancer.
Not sure I agree with this one. I don’t know how many times I’ve been asked if I’m a cop. My response is always the same: “Why? Do I look like a cop? And their response is always the same too: “Yes.” And every time I’ve had this discussion, I’ve been getting my dick sucked 10 minutes later.
The biggest factor, besides have the money to spend, which isn’t necessarily a lot, is having the balls to ask for extras. Even most extras girls won’t ask you first. You have to bring it up. When you do, you may be surprised at how many girls are down for it, even at supposedly “clean” clubs. But you also have to be prepared for “no”. Even in some of the most extras heavy clubs I have been to, their are non-extrasolar girls.
Your post says you're in LA and hitting the high end clubs there. If the high end clubs you're talking are 4Play and similar, those aren't extras clubs. If you hit BELAX then you'll have some extras opportunities and it's hit and miss whether you'll be offered versus need to ask. COI is a whole different story and if you wanna get asked, then multiple COI clubs are the ones to hit - I've only been to SRCOI, and at that only a few times (not an extras seeker and don't inquire), but the offer rate there is 50+% and likely higher at other COI clubs.
With you being in LA, you can also head 100 miles south to TJ and eliminate the line of inquiry.
rdig (the prophet of doom)
As far as how many strippers are up for extras, I'd say it's by club. Either a minority are up for it or almost all are up for it. Once there are enough strippers in a club that are up for extras, most of the ones who are not will go to a different club. "Up for it" is not cut and dried either, they're more likely to be up for it if you're under 40, their type, and are ready to drop several grand. Also common that you have to be a stripper's ITC regular for a while, if you're wanting OTC, as OTC has safety issues.
They know of what they speak 😊🔆😘
SJG
"Extras clubs" range from half the girls to all the girls. Below that you can't call it an extras club, more like a club where occasional extras happen.
Read reviews and don't be afraid to ask. I've heard "no" many times, in which case you don't push, you just move on. If you're too nervous, she might think you're a cop (mistakenly, but still). Have a drink or two.
I don't know how to ask about extras for a girlfriend, though a civvie date of mine went to a club once (not with me) and said a dancer grabbed my date's finger and inserted it into her (dancer's) vagina.
Oh, and if you have self-esteem issues, see a psychologist or psychiatrist. And don't partake of too many extras, it can be an expensive habit. I've taken a break because of that, and wanting to devote my masculine energy to civvies.
https://www.audible.com/pd/The-Myth-of-M…
SJG
https://www.nami.org/About-Mental-Illnes….
SJG
My views are consistent with Michel Foucault and R. D. Laing.
SJG
Lots of money is made from the idea of Mental Illness, and from the sham of Psychotherapy.
SJG
*ignore*
The reason the concept of mental illness exists is simply to delegitimate people who are not breaking any law. The whole thing is Josef Mengele territory. And those drugs and treatments should not even exist.
A quite moderate work:
https://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Psychiatry-…
SJG
The population of this site is extremely slanted toward men who live in a handful of extras hotspots.
Now if you were to go to, say, Diamond Dolls in South Florida and NOT get offered extras, that would be quite an accomplishment.
"extremely slanted toward men who live in a handful of extras hotspots"
No shit? Next you will probably be saying that we are all perverts.
:) :) :)
SJG
OMS 4 of 5
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZaZ1Uqvd…
He's battier than any five of us.
Keep up the good fight.
The 2 people here affecting me on this are drewcary...the processional aspect and tetradon about the thrill aspect. You can learn from anyone I guess
My rickvice: find you inner rick. How do you find your inner rick? First, you have to get yourself a stylin’ suit. Without my suit I’d just be a goofy lion. Well, given that lions are cooler than apes I’d still be cooler than most TUSCL posters but I digress…
Anyhoo…you have to find some bouncers to grease and some managers to stroke. Or maybe it is the other way round. Who the fuck knows? Well…rick knows and you can take that shit to the damn bank! Soon as the manager points out a likely candidate and the bouncer is looking the other way due to all the greasing (or stroking, as the case may be) you make your move.
Be sure to drink a nice gin rickey on your drive home with the stripper revealed by the stroked manager. If a cop stops you just look him in the eye and say “you got a problem, wildebeest? ROAR!!!”
Works every time! ROAR!!!
It's also unwise to take life advice from a guy who has aspired unsuccessfully for almost a decade to launch a rapey sex slave cult, but (thankfully) never will because he spends as much time as possible using a titty bar website as a platform for his desperate confirmation bias disguised as performance intellectualism.
Sadly, on TUSCL, all of those guys are one creepy-as-fuck guy (who won't respond to this until tomorrow when the library opens...).
Regardless, it's very rare for a dancer to offer extras unprompted on the floor even in known extras clubs. Over 90% of the time, you have to bring it up. On occasion, a dancer might bring it up after several basic lap dances to get you into VIP. Even that isn't very common.
It's on you to raise the topic.
"Right Clubs" in the US? - Basically, Inkster MI (outside Detroit), South FL (Pompano), North FL (Tampa/Pasco County), Atlanta (few clubs), suburban NJ (eg., Burlington), Texas maybe...
Start with taking your own advice and then take an elementary spelling course.
I also wouldn't take advice from someone who exists to stir shit for attention-seeking purposes.
Don't be so hasty. I'll chalk up all of the fluffy responses you have received thus far to a thread genuinely full of unicorns. But if you have not received so much as an offer of a handjob (even if hinted or she just grabbed) in all of those visits to the the dance areas of all of those venues, then there's probably a reason. As DE said, sometimes you have to speak up.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EPfKc-Tk…
A very responsible writer:
Robert Whitaker | Psychiatric Drugs & Mental Disorders | PI Podcast 5
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xX3HsiY8…
Why Psychiatric Drugs Are Killing Your Brain And How To Get Out Of The Bind With Dr. Peter Breggin
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rb2jTlgj…
SJG
Ah, I see. So you're referring to the idea of SW's being professionals, us paying them for services rendered as one would with a mechanic, etc.? How is your thinking evolving on this?
SJG
It would require addressing the underlying social problems that lead to women choosing prostitution as a career. Undiagnosed mental illness is a huge thing that leads to women being desperate enough. Addictions. Human trafficking. The myth of the happy hooker is just that.
Making it legal regulating it setting up red light districts where women have access to social workers health care...security to screen customers... would do a lot to normalize it.
Also address why many men resort to p4p. Addictions mental illness etc also plays a role. Men who go on drug binges and seek prostitutes are pretty common. Relationship problems. Social retardation...
There are a lot of factors.