Leading a Dual Life

Well then we are both unstable lol! I feel pretty much the same way. Clubbing and OTC activities are generally far from home. It's much easier to relax without the fear of running into someone when I'm out OTC with my fav dancer or escort. Yes, I have gotten the "escort vibe" from restaurant folks a few times. I can't understand why they would find it unusual that a 50 year old fat guy with thinning gray hair would be having dinner with a hot young Asian woman...ah well, f' em if they can't take a joke...

Living another life is what I always liked best about clubbing. It was a pleasant escape from the usual.

I don't feel like it's a dual life. However it's not everyday I see a bunch of naked or half naked ladies parading around and eager to get my attention whenever they spot me. Usually most people have more clothes on. I suspect most girls wouldn't so easily flash me for a dollar either. Many wouldn't do it, some might want something else or more money.

I guess my alternative is to become a muli-millionare day trader and establish a playboy type mansion and have all the pretty girls want to come over to visit. I'm not there yet.

I live a dual life in that nobody except my son and daughter know about my strip club activities. None of my co workers or friends know. Its a nice feeling that my kids know and that I do not lie to them.

Clubbing is fantasy not reality...in my case anyway. Where else are you gonna go and develop an intimate relationship with a woman that quickly. For strippers this is a volume business, so it makes sense to be as friendly and outgoing as possible. I've talked to family members and friends about the occasional trip, but I've never told them the actual frequency of my visits or everything that happens. They simply wouldn't understand. Luckily they've never asked so I guess I've never lied about it either.

When I was living with my parents, it was always difficult to explain being out so late. I always made up friends from work. It was helpful that during one of my earlier jobs, one of the people I went clubbing with occasionally was someone from work. As far as they're concerned, I only went to a club three times, once each with two different cousins, and a bachelor party I went to with my brother.

Being single and self-employed, I've never really needed to keep my strip club life secret. Still, I've done so from the start, largely because I get a rush from the intrigue of leading a dual life. It's liberating to feel free to behave in ways I usually cannot in my normal life. Sort of like what a stage name does for strippers.

However, for me that definitely does NOT carry over to OTC dates. They're more like a real date than an extension of the fantasy of a strip club. Pleasurable, for sure, but all very real.

Been going to stip clubs in vegas for years. Just for yucks I sometimes make up a completely fake identity for the dancers who constantly ask who I am am and where I'm from. I'm going out this Thursday, and I may go to a sh*t club and tell 'em I'm from the IRS and I'm investigating tax evasion among dancers, then see how long before management tries to kick me out...

Yoda, I feel you. My ATF is a 25-year old hottie half my age, and do we get the looks when we go to dinner! We just laugh about it and depending on the venue, will hug, kiss and carry on just to see 'em react.

Imnumnutz, my ATF is 38 years younger than me, but I think most people just assume that we're father-daughter, we look enough alike to be so. The only times I recall funny looks are when I buy her something at a store, especially when she tries on some clothing, models them for me, then I pay for them. I think it's funny. And best of all, I'll get to do it again in a couple weeks.

I keep it secret, more because it seems like an easier path than being all up-front about it. I go out "on my own" a lot and people can infer whatever they want, I won't confirm or deny.

So yeah, I DO live a secret and kind-of-double life. Especially when it comes to mongering of the more high-service variety, I won't be chiming in about it at any dinner parties in the near future. Part of the fun, is escaping reality for a while.

Like shadowcat, I DO lead a double life, as my son and daughter are the only ones that know I regularly frequent strip clubs.

Generally, I think all of us (gentlemen & ladies), lead dual lives, as clubbers. I can't ever recall thinking of "home or work" while clubbing, unless I'm limited on time and have to go to one of those two places.

I guess it is sort of a double life. I certainly don't tell co-workers, family or friends about my visits. Nor do I discuss much about my life with the dancers. I'd say the thing that I consider most "double life" about my clubbing is thart it is something I do alone for myself, not as a social thing with friends. So I have "club friends" (stripers, bouncers, waitresses and a few other regulars I've met in the clubs) and I have my regular circle of friends. So yeah, it is sort of two worlds. For me however there is always a danger of thhem mixing since my regular clubs are so close to work. I've met someone from work in the club more than once, but then they aren't likely to talk about their club visits at work either.

I try not to talk about visiting strip clubs while at work but a few guys have spotted me. They were there too so it's no big deal. I sometimes will hear, hey we spotted you at the club. I remember when I was in my 20's I temporarily moved back to a room in my parents house to save some money. I had a dancer occasionally calling me and asking to speak to me. I never told my parents she was a hot young strip club dancer. The dancer once threatened to tell. At work the secret that I visited strip clubs was out. One guy who seemed to think of nothing but sex seemed to be spreading rumors. I remember one girl at work asked me if I thought she would make a good stripper. At a different time another girl propositioned me and said she wanted to have a one night stand with me. I don't know what led up to all that but I believe people talk a lot. I prefer to keep things quiet.

I guess none of that was as big a surprise as when I had an unknown girl call me up while I was in High School, tell me she was a lesbian, but then say she wanted to try me out and go out with me. I didn't go out with her because she got upset by some little misunderstanding. Then the nightmares started. I was thinking what would I do if I was surrounded by a bunch of lesbian girls and they wanted to try being bi for a change. I didn't think about that for too long.

I did keep quiet about going to the beach with another dancer and her female friend. Well I thought no one at work would believe me so when someone asked what did you do for the weekend, I told him I took a couple of strippers to the beach. Just as I expected, he didn't believe me. He just said yeah right.

Where I used to work, the boss of my boss actually took me to my first strip club. I think he wanted someone to go with. Then on another occasion, we returned and a vendor ordered and paid for some pizza from Domino's. I never saw anyone order out pizza in a strip club before or after. I believe he had connections with the manager of the strip club. Where I work at now, I have never mentioned anything to my boss or immediate coworkers.

Chandler: In one post you state that "all those posts about having something more going on with their ATFs must be grounded in hard-nosed reality after all." Then a little later you write "OTCs are "more like a real date than an extension of the fantasy of a strip club. Pleasurable, for sure, but all very real."

You can't have it both ways. Either there is nothing but PLs being misled by dancers and their stripper shit, or there can be more to a relationship with an ATF than business transactions.

Just a few nights ago, I had a "double life" experience. I had my smoking pipe (tobacco! not that other stuff!) churning away in front of my face, and I boldly strode out the front door of one of our finer gentlemen's burlesques onto Bourbon Street at about 1:30 am. There before me were people from my high school class, about whom I would prefer both (a) they didn't know I smoke and (b) they didn't know I attend strip clubs. Lucky for me, they either didn't see me as I darted back in the door, or the ones who DID see and recognize me were circumspect enough to know that they had found out a secret about me which I would wish them to keep. In any case, I laid low. In fact, I later found out that just around the corner, several relatives were having dinner at a restaurant, and their seating might have overlooked me smoking and exiting.

Smoking and exiting. Dastardly! Must keep it under wraps!

:P

Doug: What, you expect me to be consistent?? I thought it was obvious I was joking around in that other thread. Not to say I back away from the point behind it.

I've been having it both ways for years. ITC, I'm a paying customer who enjoys the fantasy role strippers play for me. Quite often, it seems that there's "something more" between us, which I chalk up to having a good customer relationship. I don't feel a crying need to explain away that part of it, and I feel it's pointless to speculate on what relationship there would be if I eliminated the part I'm enjoying so much.

OTC, anything I do with a stripper has to be for real, never as a customer. It's the only way I'd want it, which girls always understand. I don't pay for their time, and I don't usually date strippers I've spent more than a token amount on ITC for dances, let alone anybody resembling an ATF. We relate in a markedly different way than ITC, as though a veil has been lifted the instant she punches out from work. That's what I mean when I say it's all very real.

Its definitely two lives, with the strip club portion only understood by a very small minority in the outside world.

The alternate reality presented to a strip club patron at times can be equated with that of the Alpha male tribal leaders 100's of thousands of years back - as they selected from the most recent crop of newly fertile females. So there is likely a primordial basis to that sort of high one sometimes feels, (particularly when having sufficient cash resources on hand), upon entering a strip club, one for example with few customers yet a large amount of attractive females walking around in skimpy outfits

The Alpha tribal leader over a period of weeks will of course be having sex with every female he desires, whereas in strip clubs its more about touching or other limited acts etc - however in any case its not an everyday occurence.

That "alpha" feeling comes to me most often in the "in between" moments in strip clubbing. I'll be walking over towards the bar from my table; or just a few moments after I come in, before my eyes have adjusted to the light and I haven't yet selected a chair to sit in; or while I'm ambling toward or from the tip rail. In these times, I can encounter a hot little thang -- a dancer I've met before, or one who's totally new to me -- and the fact that we can stand hip-to-hip, make intense eye-contact, just chat about something stupid ("hey, YOUR TITS ARE SHOWING! wahooo!" tweak tweak or anything like that) makes me "king of the world." I just lean in, she leans on me, my arm goes around her waist, my hand cups her ass, it's all SO NORMAL AND NATURAL. It's what should happen in all human interactions, the hot women should just ... LET ME FONDLE THEM.

Instinctively, that's what I feel like. There's some kind of "blockage" in society at large, a type of "hysterical Puritanical bullshit" that gives women ulcers and men DSB and probably also prostate cancer, and in a strip club you can get a FEW of the necessary endorphins to combat that disease for just a little while. It's like doing without vitamin C on a long sea voyage, almost coming down with scurvy, then hitting shore and getting that first taste of scurvy-weed or citrus. Your body NEEDS it and sends signals, the whole time you aren't getting it, that you're somehow living in the wrong universe, according to the wrong assumptions. Everything's akilter, your vision and interpretations as much as your thoughts, actions, muscles, coordination, health; until you get the needed vitamin again.

Here's a real conversation that could probably only occur in a strip club, and it would probably be your last conversation in a business setting.

Dancer A has a very very nice ass Dancer B has an incredible ass

Patron, Dancer A, and Dancer B are all having a conversation where Patron and Dancer B are telling Dancer A, that both Patron and Dancer B a few days early (sitting at the bar) were talking about and admiring Dancer B's outfit and most importantly her nice ass, when she was about 7 or 8 ft from the bar near the dancer floor

Patron says to Dancer A "You know its really not about the ass per se"

Dancer A then says "I know, its about the personality too"

Patron "not exactly, that's not what I meant"

Patron then w/o asking permission paws Dancer B (who is standing next to him at the bar) and turns her around (so back her back is now facing Patron and Dancer A), he then presses on the top of her back to cause her to lean forward into the standing doggy position

Patron while pointing to her pussy area, now says

"THIS is what's its all about"

Dancer A "oh I see"

CORRECTION

was

"Patron, Dancer A, and Dancer B are all having a conversation where Patron and Dancer B are telling Dancer A, that both Patron and Dancer B a few days early (sitting at the bar) were talking about and admiring Dancer B's outfit and most importantly her nice ass, when she was about 7 or 8 ft from the bar near the dance floor"

s/b

Patron, Dancer A, and Dancer B are all having a conversation where Patron and Dancer B are telling Dancer A, that both Patron and Dancer B a few days early (sitting at the bar) were talking about and admiring DANCER A's outfit and most importantly her nice ass, when she was about 7 or 8 ft from the bar near the dancer floor

"he Alpha tribal leader over a period of weeks will of course be having sex with every female he desires"

David9999, I think you read too many Gor novels as a kid.

Isn't that kind of an insult to the scientific accuracy of Gor novels?