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Things I Do & Don’t Do Well ...

Avatar for reverendhornibastard
reverendhornibastardDepraved Deacon of Degeneracy

I’m Good at:

  1. Structuring, drafting & negotiating complex, business transactions

  2. Feigning sincerity

  3. Talking women out of their panties

  4. Hiding my considerable conceit with self-deprecatory humor

  5. Downhill skiing

  6. Eating pussy

  7. Procrastination (there’s no time like tomorrow!)

  8. Driving in snow & ice

  9. Beating dead horses

  10. Personal bubble bursting

I’m Lousy At:

  1. Singing (I couldn’t carry a tune to save my life)

  2. Hiding my contempt for bullshit

  3. Hiding my contempt for religion

  4. Any kind of mechanical repairs

  5. Cooking (I can manage to burn water)

  6. Ignoring a crying child (or a crying woman)

  7. Keeping my pants zipped even when I really know I should

  8. Tolerating stupidity in anyone (other than me)

  9. Fashion sense

  10. Differential equations

Comments

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Avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive•

Don’t number 8 is my biggest weakness as well

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Avatar for minnow
minnow•

rhb, did you accidentally post your Linked In profile here on tuscl ? If so, a parting shot: Prior to going to an interview, a gentleman's wife said: "I hope the interview isn't more than 20 minutes because that's the longest that you can hide the inner asshole in yourself."

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Avatar for wallanon
wallanon•

Do you want us to share or comment on your list?

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Avatar for shailynn
shailynn•

Can relate with not zipping pants. Happens at least once a week - on a good week.

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Avatar for gSteph
gSteph•

Differential equations are difficult.

And singing on key?

I'll try the differential equation again.

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Avatar for Longball300
Longball300•

Ugh, Diffy Q as we called it; awful, the only "C" I ever got.

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Avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi•

what’s a differential equation?

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Avatar for shailynn
shailynn•

Things I’m good at:

Breaking stuff

Burning food

Things I’m bad at:

Remembering any important date

Holding in farts

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Avatar for BBBC
BBBC•

^ if you are bad at holding farts, i bet you can take me like a champ 😉

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Avatar for rickthelion
rickthelion•

Things I’m good at: frickin’ everything. I’m a rick after all!!

‘cept typing on my iPad. I’m still a frickin’ lion 🦁 and it is frickin’ hard to use an iPad when you have lion claws. You damn dirty apes better make internet devices that are easier for lion to use! ROAR!! ROAR!!! ROOOAAAAAARRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Avatar for Studme53
Studme53•

Ha ha - great list Rev. Gotta have self awareness. But work in the mechanical repairs. It’s an essential part of being a man. Having the right tools and knowing what their for is 3/4 of it.

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Avatar for skibum609
skibum609•

Downhill skiing is what I am third best right after smoking weed and drunk driving ....

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Avatar for Icee Loco (asshole)
Icee Loco (asshole)•

Good at.... Putting bitches on a winning team. Career management. Putting bad guys in their place. Cooking. Surfing. Rolling blunts.

Bad at.... Saving money. Getting hard with a condom on.

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Avatar for Tetradon
Tetradon•

GOOD AT

Picking stocks (though I'm no Juice)

Saving money

Online dating

Microsoft Excel

Writing

Bench press

Empathy

Confronting authority figures

Dominance in bed

Troll busting

BAD AT

Art

Running

Patience

Hiding my contempt for idiots and assholes

Kissing ass

Fashion

Neat handwriting

Sitting still

Not being hard on myself

Being diplomatic

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