Better Reviews

Techman
Ohio
Lets start rejecting reviews that do not include: date of visit and costs of basic services. Things are happening too fast to relay on a review of a visit two months ago. Past visits are acceptable as long as there is a date to judge their worth.

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skibum609
4 years ago
Tough to give great reviews when there is so little going on.
Tetradon
4 years ago
@Techman, Amen. And at least some description of the dancers.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
This has been an on-going argument on TUSCL - many agree that those details should be given, while others believe they are not important.

For various reasons, I believe a club's basic details should be given and it only takes a 2 or 3 sentences to state those details - and by details no one is talking about where the bathrooms are (costs, dancer looks, dance-mileage).

Giving club details help the reader get the gist of the club and know what to expect if they are unfamiliar w/ the club - there are good reviews that can still give you a good feel for a club w/o getting into the basic details, so I don't necessarily down-vote a review b/c it doesn't contain basic club details, but including makes it a better a review IMO - part of the problem is some PLs have been going to the same club for years and already know all the details thus feel they are not important to be given; problem is that's leaving out a big chunk of PLs that are not as familiar w/ the club.
misterorange
4 years ago
I had been a little more forgiving as things started opening up because anything was better than nothing. We're well past that now. If you want a free month of VIP, put some effort into it. And I'll decline anything that starts out, "This was my last visit before the Covid..." The sun set on that a long time ago.

Also, would love to know who's the fuck sack that's been putting up "articles" like this one:

Lola-Club Synn
For a long time I would go see this young, black dancer named Lola but never could catch her. I’ve always heard good things about her and her skills and I’ve always been intrigued. I heard through the grapevine that she’s out the game now, which sucks l. Would love to hear stories about her if anyone cares to share!
MrEddyG
4 years ago
I’ve been asking a lot more about when these visits are
wallanon
4 years ago
Having general information on when a visit happened is helpful. I've downvoted or passed on voting for reviews that are pre-COVID lockdowns or too vague on the timing of a visit. I'm not that concerned with exact dates because I don't put exact dates on all of my reviews.
Hannathedog79
4 years ago
Honestly, in terms of club details, the only thing I care about is whether or not the club is in an awful area or has a thug-vibe inside. I'm not worried about whether a beer is 6 or 7 dollars. where the stage/bar is or if the bathroom has an attendant. Lap dances are universally about $20 on the floor, and I'm not gonna get picky about an extra $5 bucks higher or lower.

What I'm really concerned about is the qualify of dancers(young spinners are the best), mileage and possible extra's. Since I'm only in clubs about 5-8 times a year, during vacations, I don't want to waste my time and money in a place with ugly, big or old dancers. I also don't want to waste my time in a club where nothing is going to happen except a little grinding. I understand that there's always the possibility that you might run into the One Dancer in an otherwise tame club, that is willing to have more fun than the usual, but it's like the needle in the haystack. Although it would be awesome to know which dancers are the really fun ones, I understand the need for discretion. But as a non-regular who loves to have fun when I do go out, it would be nice to know, with some degree of reliability, where to go and who to look for.

Back in 16-17, I had 3 of the best 4 experiences of my life, (pretty much the ultimate experiences) at a place called Cheetah's in Phoenix. Since then, my standards are probably way too high. Unfortunately, that place has gone completely downhill in terms of attractive dancers, 3 straight springs, and not a single attractive dancer to be found.

When I look at a review, I'm looking for information that indicates I might find my standards met by a dancer I find attractive, with a ballpark idea of VIP price points. I appreciate the reviews that can do that with-out necessarily naming names.
Hank Moody
4 years ago
That’s a fuck ton of words to say “what people want from reviews is subjective so good thing Founder gave us the jury system to approve reviews.” Period.
wallanon
4 years ago
Is that a metric fuck ton or just a plain ol' Merican fuck ton? You gotta be more specific, McNulty. lol
docsavage
4 years ago
I had one review that passed but was down voted by a single person saying I didn't list cost of basic services. I said the club only had one type of lap dance and listed the price and said there was no entrance fee. The only thing I could think of I didn't include was drink prices. I would never consider drink prices a factor in picking clubs to go to so would never include it in a review unless in a rare case where the prices were set absurdly high. Is this something that is a major factor for most strip club customers?
whodey
4 years ago
Doc to me drink prices aren't necessary in a review. When I am looking for prices it is more about dance costs being included since they can vary so much from location to location. The clubs I go to are typically in the $20/song range but I have been in clubs that were $5/song and a club that I just laughed and left when I was quoted $50/song.

That said, I do find drink and cover charge pricing helpful in trying to figure out the general mood/type of club. A club with no cover charge and $3 Budweisers is probably going to be a more laid back blue collar bar than one with a $25 cover and $9 Budweisers for example. It is nice to have but not necessary imho.
Eve
4 years ago
@doc, considering that most if not all clubs have a minimum drink requirement, the mongers here would like a general idea on how much they're going to spend just at the initial entry of the club. I don't think it's the highest priority at a club stop, but it is appreciated information.
busta_nut
4 years ago
@everybody ..MINNOW says not enough details...
loper
4 years ago
Drink prices are important as is the availability, quality and price of food. I will generally approve a review that says: "drove by and it is clear club is closed for good." because it's useful information and all of the other parameters are moot. Otherwise, please give all of the basic info. on quantity and quality of girls, admission, dance, and other prices and covid-19 accommodations. Editorializing in a review is also grounds for refusal.
shadowcat
4 years ago
If you know a club is closed you should submit an "Update club details" message so that Founder can update the club page.
rickdugan
4 years ago
I am not in favor of a rigid one-size-fits-all view of reviews, for many of the reasons covered here. Each person values different things and as long as I come away with some specific intel I am happy.

The one thing I hate is a drive by review. There is simply no way that you can accurately assess the state of affairs in a club by using the club as a bathroom stop or sitting there for ten minutes. There could be girls in the VIP, on their way in or even in the DR - how would you know if you just breeze through?

I will just add though that if someone doesn't mention costs, especially drink prices and cover, then he has a much higher hurdle to clear with me on the other stuff. Most club visitors are not like the day shift teetotalers that are normal fare around here. Instead they are nightshift visitors who often buy drinks for themselves and sometimes the girls as well, so bar costs are a material expense for them.

Also, not only does drink price intel let a guy know his cash burn needs, but bar practices (prices, pour, other gimmicks) is very telling about how management views and treats its customers.
goldmongerATL
4 years ago
Reviews serve a couple of purposes. They tell a new person whether they should go and update those that know the club about the recent situation.

For newbies these make a difference:
Area
Club Vibe (crowd, type of music, make it rain club, etc.)
in the door costs (parking, cover and general drink prices)
Number of dancers (is this 5 dancer club or 50 dancer club?)
Mix and quality of dancers
Price and Quality of dances plus options (dance room, individual VIP's, hotel rooms upstairs, etc.)
Extras level

What does not matter in deciding whether to visit:
Exact drink prices
How many stages and bars and where they are.
Where the shitter is (although should mention if is a pig sty).

If the review is mainly to update current customers, the above should at least be briefly mentioned. If I'm writing a review for a heavily reviewed club, I focus on the visit itself not the club.
loper
4 years ago
I agree with 90% of your points, goldmonger, but the drink bill can really add up, especially if you're buying drinks for dancers as well as yourself. Also, see my other points above. Some of us enjoy the Gentlemen's club aspect of a strip club, and want a nice evening out in addition to dancer contact.
loper
4 years ago
(I hate that I can't remove a comma to fix a punctuation error. Damn your no-edit-button stance, founder!)
minnow
4 years ago
"1pm Tuesday afternoon, no cover charge. Grabbed a $3 beer, didn't see any dancers that interested me, so I left after 20 minutes."
If I had a dollar for every submission I've seen like that, I'd have enough money to pay cash for a new Rolls Royce. This submission is deficient on so many levels. First being that it is so generic, it could apply to at least 2/5 of clubs in USA open in the afternoon.
It's not just a matter of checking off the checklist items, I need to be convinced that author actually visited club. So, the more details, the better. Dancer attractiveness, mileage, and staff attitude can be bullshitted to a certain degree, but lack of experience with club costs/services can't be BS'd out of. Does listing the costs really take that much effort.
I know that only so much lemonade can be squeezed out of a lemon, but the lack of effort to do so is appallingly obvious. Instead of just saying the dancers were unattractive, give reader an idea of how they're unattractive. Say something like, "After seeing only 2 dancers in club, 1 AA who looked like female version of Refrigerator Perry, and 1 Caucasian whose pockmarked face reminded me of Mrs. Bates corpse, the lack of visual relief killed my motivation to stay beyond 20 minutes. I'm talking a frigging review, people, not a quick tweet.

Taking a step back, lapdances/VIP's are a major reason many go to stripclubs. For me, failure to provide details about lapdance cost or mileage is a significant omission. Unless other items are very strong, my willingness to approve such a submission would be like asking me to purchase an automotive magazine with "reviews' that said " car looks sleek, interior is reasonably comfortable, exhaust note is adrenaline inducing, but we declined to do road test due to rain." Well, people who buy cars want to know how it handles on the road, would you buy magazine lacking this critical info? Same goes for lapdances/VIP's.

I know founders review guidelines aren't rigid specs, but the more closely it completely meets guidelines, the more likely I will approve it. Give enough to convince a complete newcomer whether or not they should visit club. REVIEW, not a tweet to insiders. Those who won't meet review standards are still free to post in club comments section.
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