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Did You Ever Have a Wife or Girlfriend Who Was a Stripper?

reverendhornibastard

Depraved Deacon of Degeneracy

I never had any “serious” emotional involvement with a stripper, but my first wife went through a phase during which she wanted to be a stripper.

One day after work my wife and I found ourselves trapped in unusually horrendous Houston traffic. After 45 minutes during which we only progressed about 30 yards down the road my wife pleaded that we just pull over ANYWHERE and do ANYTHING else other than sit in traffic.

I pulled into a parking lot at the first opportunity. There was a club at that location called “La Bare.” They featured male strippers.

My wife insisted we go inside. I was less than enthused but agreed anyway. Anything would be better than sitting in gridlock memorizing the license plate of the car in front of us.

We walked up to the club’s front door where we were met by an enormous man who looked like a linebacker in a tuxedo. Pointing a meaty finger at my forehead he boomed, “You can’t come in here!”

“Why not?” I demanded. I was already a lawyer and was not (easily) intimidated by enormous linebackers wearing tuxedos.

His tone became more pleasant, “That’s just the policy around here. No men are allowed. I think they’re trying to keep out the gay crowd,”

“Well, I’m not gay!” I explained. “This is my wife and she wants to go in and see the show. I’d like to accompany her.”

The 350 pound tuxedo gave me two options, “You can enter with your wife if you pay a $50 cover charge or ...”

“Or what? What’s plan B? I’m not paying a $50 cover charge!”

I had just graduated from law school and $50 was a lot of money to me.

“ ... or you can come in if you’re planning to audition.”

My young wife hopped up and down excitedly, “Thar would be great! You should audition! You’ll be a big hit with the women!”

I was very young and very fit in those days but I knew I had no business stripping and shaking my cock on a stage for the benefit of a bunch of horny women. First of all, I had worked hard to earn my law degree and had just recently received my license to practice law. I was not anxious to be disbarred for engaging in public lewdness. Beyond that, I was no dancer and I certainly wasn’t an exhibitionist.

I expressed all my reservations to my wife adding that I didn’t own suitable stripper attire. “I don’t think the women inside will be satisfied seeing me onstage stripping down to my wingtips, black socks and pinstriped boxers! Isn’t a male stripper supposed to end up wearing only a hot dog bun or some whipped cream on his penis? As you well know, I didn’t bring any hot dog buns or any whipped cream.”

I suggested she go inside anyway and enjoy herself. I would go have a drink at a hole in the wall bar located in the same strip mall a few doors down from La Bare and wait for her to come back out.

But my wife was reluctant to enter La Bare alone. So we hopped back into our car and rejoined the gridlock. Twenty minutes and about a block down the road she again insisted we pull over and do anything else.

I pulled into another parking lot and we found ourselves in front of Sugar’s. At the time, Sugar’s was one of Houston’s premier titty bars offering lap dances. It operated near the corner of Westheimer and Winrock. The club closed down ages ago.

“So now I suppose you want to go in there and see some naked dancing girls!” my wife teased.

“We don’t have to.” I said. “Look, there is a KFC right over there. We can just go eat some fried chicken and kill some time before we rejoin the traffic. Maybe the traffic will have thinned out some by then.”

But my wife didn’t want any KFC and said she’d go sit with me in “this Sugar’s place” as my reward for at least trying to accompany her into La Bare.

My wife had never seen a place like Sugar’s! She was amazed at how hot the dancers were, how tiny their G-strings were and how lewd the lap dances were.

We sat in the club for about an hour, maybe a little more. We did not buy any lap dances but my wife did tip a dancer on the stage.

When we left the club the traffic was still horrible but now at least it was moving. During the next hour as we made our way home all she talked about was what she had seen in Sugar’s. In fact, her experience at Sugar’s was a frequent topic of conversation in our home for the next several days.

“It must be quite a turn on for the dancers to be up on stage, practically naked and having every man in the club staring at her, wanting so desperately to fuck her!”

My wife seemed to be voicing a new sexual fantasy.

A few days later she announced her desire to be a stripper - “just a few times, just for the thrill of it.”

She asked if I would mind.

Despite my deep reservations I went along with the idea. It was her sexual fantasy and, as her husband, I felt I was well placed to reap the sexual rewards of allowing her to pursue this cockamamie idea.

“You will have to buy some suitable clothes first,” I told her. You can’t just prance onto the stage in your panties and Birkenstocks!”

The following weekend we went to some shops that sold dildos, massage oils, raunchy DVDs, minuscule G-strings and stilettos. She found what she needed.

When we got home she put on her new stripper outfit. I was enormously impressed. She truly looked the part! She had the figure, the youth, a pretty face and a tight, athletic body! All she needed now were some over-sized hoop earrings and about two pounds of industrial strength mascara!

I had never fucked a stripper at that point in my life so I took the opportunity to ask her for a lap dance right there in our living room. Afterwards I fucked her good and hard on the couch.

My wife’s new sexual fantasy was paying off already!

Next we had to decide where she wanted to debut. She didn’t want to debut in a club as big as Sugar’s. She thought she’d be less intimidated in a smaller, less glitzy place with fewer dancers who looked like international underwear models. So we drove around and scoped out some smaller clubs until she found one she was comfortable with.

Once inside, I told her she was going to have to approach the management about auditioning. “Don’t tell them you just want to dance once or twice for grins,” I cautioned her. “Tell them you’d like to added to their roster of regular strippers.”

I was confident the manager would sign her up. My wife still had all her clothes on but was already the hottest woman in this small, neighborhood strip club.

My wife was out of sight with the manager for quite a while. I became a bit concerned about her safety.

She eventually returned - all smiles. The manager agreed to let her dance! She kissed me and headed for the dressing room.

About 30-40 minutes later the DJ introduced a “ ... hot new dancer fresh in from Austin who is making her first appearance our stage! Please put your hands together for Candide Yammz!”

I was the one who had come up with her stripper name so I knew damn good and well who was about to take the stage.

When she stepped onto the stage my tongue fell out of my mouth! My wife was barely recognizable. In her tiny G-string and thin, sequined tank top, strutting and shaking her fine ass under the multicolored flashing lights, she teased the audience by pulling her G-string down as far as the rules allowed. Then she fell to her knees and peeled off her tank top before rolling onto her back. Splaying her athletic legs widely in the air, she pretended to manually please herself like the dancers she had seen at Sugar’s.

She was now a smoking hot stripper!

She did, however, wisely stay off the pole.

During the second several older men and a kid who looked too young to be in the club approached the stage and tipped her. She got on her hands and knees and rocked provocatively as if daring them to touch her sexy ass that was fully revealed by her spaghetti thin G-sting back.

I also approached the stage and tucked two $20s into my wife’s flimsy G-string.

My wife got up on stage twice more that evening. She was clearly having the time of her life.

When we got home, I fucked her twice on the carpet in our living room as soon as we had closed the front door.

I had never fucked a stripper before!

My wife never got on stage again, but I’ve been fucking strippers ever since.