Paying a stripper for a teenage romance simulation?
CC99
Say yes to the sex industry!
So my junior year of college is only about 5 or 6 days from being over which means I only have 1 more year left here. At this point I'm starting to think I'll probably never be able to organically have that sweet, teenage romance where the girl actually likes me back, I've had several lifetimes worth of unrequited crushes but I still haven't gone out with a girl to the movies, shared popcorn together, sat in the park holding hands, or any of that stuff. The way I lost my virginity was truly bizarre and uncharacteristic for my age. I still want to have that teenage romance experience though and an instinct inside of me says I will regret it for the rest of my life if I don't have that experience. I'm 21 right now but can easily pass for someone who's 16 or 17 which will make it feel way more authentic than if I didn't do this until I was 30 for example. There's also the fact that if I do it relatively soon, the potential for other people to find it "creepy" is dramatically reduced from a 35 year old guy paying a girl to do this so I essentially need to do this before people find it creepy. If I don't still have a baby face or feel young it also might not feel the same. But I also know my brain and I know that my brain enjoys fantasy simulations just as much as the real thing if it comes close enough.
So I was thinking about writing out a long simulation that details "encounters" in an episodic format from first meeting to the end and then finding a cute girl at a strip club preferably in the 18-20 range to meet me at various locations and pretend to be a high school sweetheart. Most of the actual conversations would be impromptu but I'll just write like guidelines for what to do and where to move the conversation to and stuff like that. Adults can't just stand around in high school hallways flirting so I figure that a community college hallway can serve as a good substitute for anything taking place in a "school" setting. I'm thinking that I'll write it out well ahead of time so that I have a chance to forget a lot of it before I actually go about doing it. For the girl I was thinking I'd meet her in the strip club, buy a few dances, tell her what I'm trying to do and then hand her a piece of paper with all the instructions and episodes on it as well as the payment amount for each episode.
My question though is that if I'm going to do this, quite a few of the "episodes" on the simulation would not include any intimate encounters. It has to go from start to end so we're not going to be fucking right off the bat. But some episodes absolutely will involve intimate encounters. How should I go about putting in the different payment amounts per episode though? I don't think I should give like $300 for "the first encounter" for example if its just going to be talking for a little bit in a hallway. I suppose I can try combining episodes in the same day but at the same time, I don't think a non-intimate encounter should have the same payment as an "intimate encounter" episode.
So I guess my question is, how should I go about structuring the payment for each episode? A two hour episode ending in sex obviously deserves a higher payment than a two hour episode that just features meeting in a hallway and getting coffee? We all know that local markets are different so instead of giving a hard dollar amount like "give her $300 for this and $150 for that," give me ratios. Like should the payment for a non-intimate encounter be approximately half the payment for an intimate encounter or 1/4 of one? Does an encounter that just involves a little kissing count as an "intimate encounter?" Should I create an intimacy scale that determines different payment amounts by the level of intimacy that happens during the episode?
So I was thinking about writing out a long simulation that details "encounters" in an episodic format from first meeting to the end and then finding a cute girl at a strip club preferably in the 18-20 range to meet me at various locations and pretend to be a high school sweetheart. Most of the actual conversations would be impromptu but I'll just write like guidelines for what to do and where to move the conversation to and stuff like that. Adults can't just stand around in high school hallways flirting so I figure that a community college hallway can serve as a good substitute for anything taking place in a "school" setting. I'm thinking that I'll write it out well ahead of time so that I have a chance to forget a lot of it before I actually go about doing it. For the girl I was thinking I'd meet her in the strip club, buy a few dances, tell her what I'm trying to do and then hand her a piece of paper with all the instructions and episodes on it as well as the payment amount for each episode.
My question though is that if I'm going to do this, quite a few of the "episodes" on the simulation would not include any intimate encounters. It has to go from start to end so we're not going to be fucking right off the bat. But some episodes absolutely will involve intimate encounters. How should I go about putting in the different payment amounts per episode though? I don't think I should give like $300 for "the first encounter" for example if its just going to be talking for a little bit in a hallway. I suppose I can try combining episodes in the same day but at the same time, I don't think a non-intimate encounter should have the same payment as an "intimate encounter" episode.
So I guess my question is, how should I go about structuring the payment for each episode? A two hour episode ending in sex obviously deserves a higher payment than a two hour episode that just features meeting in a hallway and getting coffee? We all know that local markets are different so instead of giving a hard dollar amount like "give her $300 for this and $150 for that," give me ratios. Like should the payment for a non-intimate encounter be approximately half the payment for an intimate encounter or 1/4 of one? Does an encounter that just involves a little kissing count as an "intimate encounter?" Should I create an intimacy scale that determines different payment amounts by the level of intimacy that happens during the episode?
152 comments
But why do you even pay? Haven't you learned from your buddy SJG you just need to hold a stripper down, stick your tongue in her mouth to hypnotize her into doing whatever you ask?
CC99, Ha Ha Ha
If you find an inexperienced girl, you can have lots and lots of long makeout sessions with her, before she yields.
They say that at the LA Hostess Dancing Clubs, it is all much more romantic than strip clubs. And the TV room is the makeout room.
But CC, you are not a teenager anymore. If you just learn how to play it some, you can have good makeout sessions with whatever women you know. Strip Club ITC will have its limits, but respected posters have related good ITC makeout sessions. But once you have your girl out side, you just have to learn how to play it some, lead her along, and you can make it real nice.
SJG
You're not a teenage though and you should just take this energy and focus on having the real thing. Just date a girl with downs syndrome or autism or someone who can relate to you on your level.
You're just hurting yourself and stunting your personal growth with this crap
An escort would likely be an easier way to go. They are more used to fulfilling these type of fantasies. But I suspect that attractive 18-21 yo escorts are probably hard to find, and also very expensive if you find them. I have no experience with non-stripper escorts so I don’t know how to address these issues.
My advice is to lower your standards a little bit and find a regular girl at school to fulfill your fantasies with. Address your fears, whatever they may be, and conquer them to get the pussy. Or try finding a stripper to fuck you for free. I’ve had one fuck me for free at my advanced age, so for a guy who is 21 that should be a lot easier to do.
Hey @icey..you trying to contribute to what leads to suicide ? Not saying DC might be affected by this severely negatively ..but u just engaged in a common behavior that leads to suicide ...
If you connect up with a girl at a very loosely run strip club, and that usually will be a dive, then you can probably get a front room makeout session going with a girl you select and approach. You don't need to have a discussion about it with her, or negotiate with her. Just start handing her money, that gets her to accept that in lieu of dances.
Best if you have just met her.
Then when it is time for your own pants to come down, just invite her into the back room.
With a girl you are seeing regularly, you still should be able to get good makeout sessions, though this will not always be guaranteed.
SJG
But that kind of statistical analysis is merely muggle stuff. They are showing us how social conformity works.
Social conformity is what restricts our evolution.
SJG
I think to make a sexual relationship which includes extensive makeout session keep on going, you have to figure out ways to further orchestrate the encounters. This is where my organization will come in, teaching people about ritualized sex magic.
Our local women, like the ones I call "The Beloved Latina Escorts", they are makeout session specialists.
SJG
The teen romance fantasy is not just for teenagers, I would say it is more about young love.
Rather than pay for the experience, try to cultivate friendships with multiple "in your league", relatively age appropriate women.
If you are not a total creep and show interest in the women and respect her boundaries, she may show you the type of affection you craze.
But I would also add that there are built in negative dimensions of college, in my opinion. One should not however let this slow them down. But I do believe that many men do end up selecting Voluntary Celibacy, as they want to maximize their learning experience and avoid negative dynamics.
My organization will resolve all these issues.
SJG
Face to face first meetings always better than calling escort ads.
SJG
idk if I like cc but I was just saying.Lol.
Too late.
Regardless, he's just hurting his personal development. Going for girls on his level would do wonders for him though.
"At this point I'm starting to think I'll probably never be able to organically have that sweet, teenage romance where the girl actually likes me back, I've had several lifetimes worth of unrequited crushes but I still haven't gone out with a girl to the movies, shared popcorn together, sat in the park holding hands, or any of that stuff. The way I lost my virginity was truly bizarre and uncharacteristic for my age. I still want to have that teenage romance experience though and an instinct inside of me says I will regret it for the rest of my life if I don't have that experience. I'm 21 right now but can easily pass for someone who's 16 or 17 which will make it feel way more authentic than if I didn't do this until I was 30 for example. There's also the fact that if I do it relatively soon, the potential for other people to find it "creepy" is dramatically reduced from a 35 year old guy paying a girl to do this so I essentially need to do this before people find it creepy. If I don't still have a baby face or feel young it also might not feel the same. But I also know my brain and I know that my brain enjoys fantasy simulations just as much as the real thing if it comes close enough.
"
The college situation is just not always conducive to romance and dating. I you want to take a girl to the movies, you just ask her.
You are worrying 100x too much. No time is running out for you. People or something is messing with your head.
If you start taking a girl out you will get all the romance and makeout sessions anyone could ever want. College though may have made that hard.
As far as being older, you can also take young women out.
As far as with escorts, they are specialists in GFE. Though I would suggest doing it with a strip club girl, as that means you have had a face to face first meeting.
I feel for you, as somehow someone or something is giving you anxieties which you should not have to feel.
When I was I college I did not really run on car keys and wallet dating. That came much earlier. I instead went to parties, which were everywhere. Not always that good for getting girls, but it still works.
People go for the car keys and wallet strip more as they get a bit older. If you use that, from a state of being in the work place, the success rate is near 100%. Girls out of college live for car keys and wallet dates, and they are horny as hell.
In college it can still happen. Just most people do not have the time.
I feel for you, being made to feel these anxieties, and taking the situation so personally, and being made to believe that you are somehow different from other people.
It is not like this in the work place. You will have girls hunting you down.
In college, well it can be tough. But like especially in the start of a term or the start of a school year, things are not as bad.
Also, if you have time and money, you can go after town girls. Sometimes such will even be at college parties.
Please, don't let these times get to you!
SJG
"If you just learn how to play it some, you can have good makeout sessions with whatever women you know. Strip Club ITC will have its limits, but respected posters have related good ITC makeout sessions. But once you have your girl out side, you just have to learn how to play it some, lead her along, and you can make it real nice."
That's not what I'm trying to do though. That's the strip club experience, I'm trying to get something a lot more advanced than that.
Its never going to happen at my college. All these girls just wanna hit it and quit it. They wouldn't be willing to do something like this. If I pay for it I can specify everything so that it plays out like a dream.
Its not really a pre-written script as in word for word what to say. I don't even want that. Its more like just general guidelines for what happens.
And you're very wrong about women.....especially young girls. They love romantic shit and want to experience the whole fairy tale thing. You need to realize its not them, its you...But you refuse to work on yourself. That's the reality of it.
I'm not saying this to be mean, I'm giving you honest advice. I don't see the problem in trying to connect with someone on the spectrum.
And its beyond unhealthy to try to script a romance. What makes it romantic is the unexpected and the way you end up feeling, the little moments ... Its about how you make each other feel. Not about role playing scenarios and scripted reactions. But you've convinced yourself you can't do anything and won't go after the type of woman you can go for. And if the strippers you meet really thought it was all so cute, they wouldn't just be there for P4P and a GFE....
Forget about hookers and join this
http://www.spectrumsingles.com/
I need to do this because my youth is incomplete. I can't move on yet. Instead of continuing to wage your crusade against prostitution you can tell me what the best way is do this?
Its not a "dating simulation" its role playing.....
You can't recreate your past but you can live the situations you missed out on with someone who likes you.
The best way is to hire a hooker who specializes in role playing. But she'll most likely be an older, hardened whore type....
I think a really young girl will think its creepy unless she's really into you. If you pay her the odds of flaking out before the role playing scenarios are completed, is pretty high.
Maybe you can hire 2 girls.... a wannnabe actress or acting student for the non sex parts and then a hooker for the sex parts. It would be cheaper....
One piece of advice: stop focusing on what can't do and concentrate on what you can do.
You believe a FWB relationship won't give you what you want, but if you try it may.
My point is there is no full proof plan to getting what you want, all you can do is go out there and try.
You may strike out or you might hit a home run, but only if you get up to bat.
DC there are definitely girls weird enough out there to do shit like this. They may not be a 10 but they are definitely out there. How many of those weird anime girls that go comic con wouldn't sign up for some weird shit like this.
I can't go out in public with her, I'm already at somewhat cringey lonely weeb levels but that's too far even for me. But yes I do do some of that in my room.
@Muddy
You could have a point. I might have a shot there. She doesn't need to be a 10 but I am looking for a cute girl to do it with.
You actually gave me a good idea. I think filming a man and his Daku pillow would make a great art film... Chapters like taking it to a strip club, on a date. A picnic... reliving his youth at his old high school....It would be really interesting.
It would be an interesting art film. Part of the challenge with owning one is that training your imagination takes mental effort for sure. I also think you have to prevent yourself from thinking about what you don't have and learn to appreciate all her positive qualities and what she provides for your life. Daki pillows are surprisingly soft and cuddly, I do feel a sense of affection whenever I look at and hug her. The simple feeling of having someone in bed with me when I sleep also makes me feel better. I occasionally relapse and start thinking about other things though which puts me in a bad mood but whenever I think about her or start hugging her I do feel better. I wish I had more privacy so I could actually watch TV with her but I'm still too inhibited to be open about it with my roommates. I've only told one friend about her because he is an autistic weeb who struggles with girls too. His reaction was pretty funny when he saw her he was just like "not surprised."
Five or six days left.
Objectively true but its also not good to dwell on that fact when you can't really do anything about it. Its kind of like if you had previously been working minimum wage, making $15,000 a year and barely scraped by on life, then suddenly received a promotion to manager and now you're making $35,000 a year. You might not be where you really want to be at yet but you can't dwell on that fact. You just have to just appreciate how much better things are now than they used to be, and you have to find contentment in that. You can work towards finding what you really want but in the moment, you have to appreciate what you have and all the little moments that give you happiness.
She is perfect, its just my mindset that needs to be adjusted.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ewqKdEuZ…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pzhxm-bT…
"We go to get coffee, you start getting a little more flirty and interested but don’t have a crush yet."
This is what I meant by "guidelines." I think some of you thought I was wanting a play by play script kind of thing.
My suggestion would be to pay a dancer from a club where you might expect to find OTC “dates”. Pay her well enough and often enough that she knows you, knows you’re not a creep, and make some initial acts of intimacy either OTC or in VIP. If that goes well find a setting where you can talk uninterrupted and explain your desire. Negotiate a total price ( I wouldn’t try to break down individual acts by price) and kind of low ball it in order to give in to some of her requests. Ask her for suggestion from the woman’ perspective.
I know a woman who’s looking into a web site for fetishes and there are some quirky ones out there. She and her BF were paid $500 to go to a customer’s house and insult and demean him with an emphasis on telling him his dick was small. If some guy can find a willing service provider for that an extended GFE should be a piece of cake.
But maybe chapters like....
The first meeting
Realizing you love each other on your first real date
Having sex
More sex
Breaking up
Are you including breaking up in the scenario to let the relationship run its course?
And speaking of movies, sort of reminds me of one of my favorites...
Dickie Roberts Former Child Star
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u51-0sIY…
Yeah I kind of see this as taking the GFE and actually making it official but with the added element of essentially rewinding the clock on my life just for a little bit. To me, this doesn't feel anywhere near as "creepy" as I'm sure some other requests a stripper gets. Weird perhaps in the sense that few people would ask for this but not really as creepy as some people seem to think it is. I think to a young girl it could even be exciting to play a character or role especially since everything is pretty tame and vanilla. A no kiss provider would be a serious problem but my club doesn't seem to have those types. My club has a lot more providers that are definitely no extras girls but seem to be fine with kissing. No kissing would absolutely be a deal breaker. If I come across a girl who's perfect for this scenario in every way but won't do the actual sex part I might just ask if she can do a more intimate lap dance that would cause an LDK. I think your idea of giving a block payment actually sounds better because if it comes out to $4,000 for the whole thing then all she's going to hear is "I could make $4,000 if I do this." I definitely agree that I shouldn't ask her right off the bat though.
@IceyLoco
Yeah I was figuring that I should have a a few episodes where the relationship runs its course and we breakup. I think I still want to have some guidelines for the whole thing though.
What about a petite Asian from a massage parlor?
@FLF
No I won't. I'm sick of running away from my dreams. I'm making this happen one way or another.
There once was a dancer at my favorite club whose looks captivated me. The first time I saw her I paid her $200 for 10 lap dances. The second time we did a one hour VIP. As well as some great conversation I got a HJ, FIV, and ended with her sitting on my face. As we walked out of VIP she was winded and turned to me and said, “I don’t do that.”
For several weeks she wouldn’t go to VIP with me but gave great lap dances with more hands on activities.
Finally I wrote to her on FB Messenger and made it clear that I had to have sex with her. Name a price! If it’s not going to happen tell me now. She wrote back saying she enjoyed time with me, felt we could work something out. She needed some extensive dental work, had an estimate of $2000, and if I paid the dentist she’d be my sex slave for 24 hours - no holes barred [sic]. I just happened to know a monger from the club who had his own dental practice. I talked with him and she saw him for evaluation. He told me he’d do it for $800.
Sex with her was better than I had hoped for. She was passionate, rolled our blunts real tight, and did her damnedest to fulfill every act I wanted.
I didn’t tell her of the cut rate, but did “tip” her by buying a $450 couch for her apartment. For later visits to her apartment I bought her more furniture. She also beat me at chess, 2 out of 3. I think I was distracted.
"I need to do this because my youth is incomplete. I can't move on yet."
I suspect that if you successfully navigate this scenario... somehow... then you'll still feel incomplete. Because you didn't have the genuine experience you crave. It'll be paid for and not real. And you'll know it.
But that's for you to sort out on your own.
The scripting you describe is similar to how story producers direct reality TV series participants. They know that they aren't dealing with actors who can recite lines. So, they direct in broad strokes based on the "actor's" ability.
Bottom line... this is going to be expensive. Finding a young woman who'll show up consistently, stay in character, and feed you the scenarios you want is a tall order.
You're probably going to have a bunch of false starts with different girls because they'll no-show, or just look at you and say "Can't I just suck you off?"
This will also be expensive because you're asking the woman to express deep intimacy and emotionalism toward you. You may find that a lot of women will place a higher premium on *that* than inserting tab A into slot B.
But to your original question on payment structure. You can pitch whatever you want, but the girl will likely have other ideas. Still...
I'd go with a base hourly rate that can be broken into 15-minute increments. That's just for showing up. Add extra individual payments for increased levels of intimacy (physical and emotional) as well as "episode" complexity.
What should those dollar amounts be? No idea. It'll vary wildly based on the girl, her professionalism, and her bills (quite frankly).
All that being said, I think that this will be an expensive way to not scratch the itch you want scratched. Because the fact is that you don't get to have all the life experiences you want. That's how life works.
But I'm not going to tell you you're having fun wrong. You need to figure it out on your own.
Good luck.
I think finding someone would be easier if you place an add online. That will weed out a lot of women right from the start.
Being in college is just a compromised situation.
I can speak from my own experience of spending time at a college when I was in my early 30's. Early 20's girls were coming on to me anywhere I went. Totally different from when I was their age. Girls can just tell if you have more live experience, and that is extremely attractive to them.
You have your fun with your strippers and all, and that is fine.
But you should not let yourself be forced into having to have P4P women as your primary source of relationships.
I guess some people find college to be good, but many do not. When you can draw more on an identity built on an outside career, you will find young women being more open to you, likely sometimes even too much so.
And this idea of Autism - Aspergers is nonsense.
SJG
So get out there young man and make some genuine experiences rather than asking a bunch of old fucking men how to pay for fake ones. There'll be plenty if time for that when you get old yourself.
Btw, anyone else notice how so many of these ridiculous stories are written in the same voice? We really need some better creative writing around here - sheesh.
SJG
That said, not everyone goes through their youth the same. Not everyone wants to party, carouse, join a boxing gym, do MMA, start bodybuilding, or join a wacky-pants fictional sex cult that exists entirely within the noggin of a Northern California shut-in that hasn't seen a vagina...
As I mentioned to Reverendhornibastard in another thread, you don't have to understand why people like the things they do. People want a variety of things. It's fine.
But I'm still highly skeptical of this thing panning out.
Think about your future career too, any initial moves there will help you with the ladies.
SJG
How the date simulation will turn out :p
... but here we are.
Thanks, nicespice.
If this fantasy does come to fruition it won't change anything but at least it will make for a good story....
SJG
@RickDugan why is it so confusing to you that a 21 year old guy might want to do this? Not all 21 year old guys are bar hopping studs. I went to enough parties freshman and sophomore year of college that the novelty has worn off and I'm not really interested in pursuing a "party lifestyle" anymore. I tried that for two years and it didn't work for me. I still go to them, but I don't really care much for them anymore. All parties are pretty much the same, you drink a little, you dance a little, maybe you dance with a girl or two if you're feeling good that night, you have small talk with a few people, you come home having nothing but questions. If no girl danced with you, why? If girls did dance with you, why so short? If she was comfortable enough to grind on me or kiss me then why doesn't she want my number? Why didn't she want to get coffee or dinner with me? Why would she do that and just walk away?
@SJG
I don't just want "pussy," I want this. I want to create a dream and live through it.
But...
1. Speculation from laypeople doesn’t beat a real diagnosis from a medically trained professional.
2. There are resources out there for autistic individuals if a particular aspect or two of the condition is causing disruption in life.
https://www.verywellhealth.com/treatment…
CC, I beg you to use the time and money to pursue actual medical help. A future girlfriend would be a symptom of improvement later on, not the solution itself.
These are the problem, not the solution.
"resources out there for autistic individuals"
The purpose of these is to make the targeted individual submit and exonerate perpetrators.
"actual medical help"
Again, the last thing he needs, to medicalize his life experience.
"A future girlfriend would be a symptom of improvement later on, not the solution itself."
One of the darkest things I have ever seen posted on this forum.
I suggest starting here, the evidence is quite compelling:
https://www.amazon.com/Myth-Autism-Medic…
SJG
:)
SJG
Eventually CC you will see this. Hard though when you are still in it.
But don't let this lead you into believing in Autism, as it really is total bullshit.
https://www.amazon.com/Constructing-Auti…
SJG
I finally sent an email to my mom actually two nights ago about going into therapy. For some reason it was really difficult to tell her exactly how I've been feeling this whole time. For some reason I try so hard to protect my parents from the truth. I don't tell them if I got into an accident, I censored the worst aspects of my alcohol poisoning last November, I keep trying to tell them things are mostly ok. They know I'm depressed but I try to make it seem like its not too bad. But your not the only one who has told me to go see a therapist.
We're looking into counselors for me to go see when my semester is finished and I return home.
Make your comrades on the barricades, fighting shoulder to shoulder, not in opposing arm chairs in the therapist's office.
Sorry you have had some bad situations.
SJG
You must be referring to any of your numerous threats of violence and/or death when someone starts asking that you be responsible for your bullshit. Or, perhaps to the creepy-as-fuck Sleepy Time Rapist stuff you post.
Luckily (or unluckily) for them, not having having a significant other is of no concern to either of them. They are happy guys and all their medical needs and basic life functions are covered by the state, with me as a backup in the future if for whatever reason funding becomes an in issue in the far off future. One of them recently turned 36 but if you looked at him, you would think he is 20.
Because of my personal life experiences, I wouldn’t say autism is inherently a “problem” as far as being a human with worth. But because CC has personal goals, and his brain chemistry is inhibiting him, then yes he needs the extra help from those who could help him best.
Sami Timimi and he two co-authors do an excellent job of demolishing the idea that autism could be real.
CC has goals, and they will be harder to reach if he starts accepting nonsense, the sort which wants to label people. It does after all come from the eugenics movement. Today it is propagated as part of neo-liberalism.
SJG
Finding someone to talk to on a clinical / therapy level sounds like a good idea. I know people who have gotten a lot of good out of it. Be picky, though. Find someone who is right for you.
And, not for nothing, but this teen sweetheart fantasy might be a good launching point with whoever you select.
I actually find your rants about various topics and propensity to take the most unusual stances as one of the most endearing aspects of your personality. Even if I don't agree with you, I still read it and go "yup that's SJG." But you haven't been around me in person, I don't know if you quite understand how difficult this year really was for me. I've had chronic depression for nearly three years now, I have to do something about it or it could kill me someday. My grades have already been permanently affected by this and I will never get those back, but I'm not at the point yet where I can't recover from this. But if I continue to choose inaction, that might not be the case for much longer.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBJTeNTZ…
SJG
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BBJTeNTZ…
SJG
I am paraphrasing what it says in Peter Breggin's "Toxic Psychaitry
https://www.amazon.com/Toxic-Psychiatry-…
Sorry to hear that things have been so tough for you.
SJG
I don't want to discourage you in your studies. But you are not a machine. And college really can suck.
SJG
My parents have suspected it for a long time because of the symptoms I've displayed and the fact that I end up forming a special kind of bond with every autistic person I've ever met but have refrained from getting an actual diagnosis because they didn't want people to treat me differently. My dad is kind of old fashioned and thinks that if you get diagnosed, people will forever not think of you as "CC99" but rather as "that autistic kid," and he didn't want me to have to live with a label. But, actually extremely recently, we've talked about actually getting me diagnosed, my mom wants to do it and I'm thinking that I should too. It could help with job interviews and explain why I might be a little awkward. I'm not far enough on the spectrum that its obvious I'm on it, but I'm enough on it that people have always thought I was weird.
That said, if you get a positive diagnosis, it's not like you're suddenly obligated to wear a "Autistic Guy" hat and t-shirt. You can share it (or not) however you want.
I think you should get tested so that you know what you're dealing with. But I'm a guy you don't know on the internet. Take that for what it's worth.
That too, that's another big reason I've thought getting a diagnosis would be good. If I figure out exactly which perceptions are different I can learn what exactly I can do about it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzL9sAJm…
"No such thing as autism at a biological level"
Is it clinically useful? Timimi argues convincingly that the answer to this is no.
CC99 I feel for you wanting answers. But look at the situation, you are in a very high pressure environment, an effective delay of adulthood, and you look for understanding by finding something about yourself?
Why not get some other kind of outside life experience, different environment, not age or socio economic segregated?
What does an autism-aspergers assessment really mean?
That you accept it means that you have been manipulated and beaten down, and that now you are trying to get through in life by placating abusers, living as an Uncle Tom, living by making appeals to Pity.
If you have been marginalized, then the way you get back a legitimated socio-public identity is by engaging with abusers and with the sources of injustice, and kicking ass.
"fantasy that there is an explanation now", Sami Timimi
SJG
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzL9sAJm…
SJG
In the above Sami Timimi video, he says to the effect that more important than diagnosing them with a particular condition, look at what it is that made them want to seek help, why are they seeking answers about some condition? Does a diagnosis actually help them get the changes they want? What actually brought them to services?
SJG
No clinical use to it.
Simply a sociological meaning to it, part of the neo-liberal project, what Foucault calls BioPolitics.
Ask, what is one really looking for, what brings them seeking the acessment? What is going on for this person which they are concerned about, and then how is that best addressed?
Such assessments, just totally off base, a violation of your personhood at all levels. Encouraging you to live by seeking pity, rather than by punishing perpetrators.
SJG
Typically, at somewhere between 3 and 100 responses, the train derails entirely.
But I agree it's a bad idea.
Sami Timimi is extremely good:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EzL9sAJm…
CC99, you do understand that teenagers and adolescence are the creation of advertisers? In prior times adulthood started at age 14, and high school was only for the certainly college bound. Everyone else could just go into the work force.
There is a great cost for being dubbed college bound.
Book too conservative for me, but well worth reading nevertheless, any edition will do:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/125956…
And you understand that these Adolescent Romances are head trips, largely based on the fact that adolescents don't have many places for privacy, are being supported by their parents, and based on the maintenance of virginity.
I encourage you CC to find real relationships with women you can know, strippers, college girls, town girls, and not to try and simulate anything and not to subject yourself to our version of the resurgent eugenics movement.
This eugenics movement is very compatible with neo-liberalism, and with the political fraud known as Libertarianism.
Good Luck
SJG
Mankind had evolved in small bands as homopoliticus.
But now they want everyone to be working the Financial Literacy program, passively doing what is expected of them, being homoeconomicus.
So anyone who offers any tendency towards resistance, is to get a ~neurological difference~ label.
SJG
Adulthood didn't start at 14 because people in the past went through puberty a lot later than they do today. 14 year olds in 1800 would have actually looked like children. Guys didn't even start going through puberty until 16 back then whereas today they start going through puberty in the 11-13 range. Developmentally, people in the early industrial age would've physically been four years behind people today. Not in terms of muscle strength, people back then were strong, but in terms of hormonal development. The difference was though that once you were done with puberty, you were considered a fully grown adult. There was no adolescence, or young adulthood stages, it was just, you're a child, you're becoming a man, you are a man.
So in 1800, a 14 year old boy would've looked like what we think of a 10 year old looking like today. Take a look at this photo for example of a Hitler's youth member getting a medal...
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hitler_You…
If you were to take a guess you'd probably think this kid was 12 or 13...
This kid is 16 years old.
At every age I've always looked significantly younger than I really was but even I didn't look that young when I was 16.
And it doesn't matter how young you look. Its about how old you are and where you should be at and strive to be at.
Sure I was envious.
But I didn't hold it against him.
This was senior year. Then a stuffed shirt of a high school teacher, always talking about his four daughters, started going on about how there's "always a guy trying to corrupt the girl". Coming from this stuffed shirt teacher, I was not surprised. But what blew me away was that this girl was vigorously nodding in agreement with him.
That someone of my generation would go along with that virginity centered gender war interpretation really shocked me. Feminists had long rejected that.
I didn't hold it against her if she wanted to keep her virginity. That was her business. But there was a broader political context. As I saw it, she was a traitor in what had been a long war.
As senior year ended, I know that this girl dumped that guy, she had bigger college and career plans than he.
Really in retrospect, me getting rejected hard and he getting her as a senior year GF, I think I still may have been the one who got the better deal.
Adolescence did not used to exist. Produced by 20th century advertisers, as a market segment. Used to be that adulthood started at age 14. Except for the college bound, 14yo's would enter the work force. They were eligible to marry. Voting age of 21 meant that you had been an adult for 7 years, hence were qualified to vote.
Well worth reading most carefully, any edition will do, used in colleges for decades:
https://www.amazon.com/Adolescence-Laure…
High School used to be only for the college bound, "College Prep". For others, 8th grade was it. Like this for my grandparents.
Then later, reformers and the starting labor union movement, joined forces and unions decided that they did not want to compete with child labor. So the vocational high school and universal grades up to 12 were instituted, along with truancy and child labor laws.
So today, most high schools have a college track and a non-college track, and people can cross over as they like.
My point in this though is to show that adolescence is a 20th century manufactured phenomenon. And it is not always pleasant, as it denies you adult status.
Adolescent romance usually involves several factors:
1. Preservation of virginity.
2. People in that adolescent world so they are kept on short leashes and don't get much privacy
3. People being supported by their parents and living with their parents.
4. People functioning in an age segregated world, often class and race segregated too.
So my point here again is just to show you how contrived this all is.
It can happen. I have had two virgins. With one she gave it up quite quickly. Mostly it was just that she was not in an age, gender, and class segregated private college anymore.
With the other, she was real slow. No pressure from me at all though. Again, just that she was no longer in the environment which had subjected her to lots of scrutiny. She wanted to move into the dynamics of adult life.
Loosing it always changes the girl and the relationship though. It is no longer carefree and easy. Now there are all sorts of externally produced expectations.
These things happen, but once someone has more experience and is getting their pay check and keeping their own place, usually things happen much more quickly. Many guys see virgins as head cases, and thus put them off limits. Personally I am inclined to agree. I have no interest in them.
Lots work in the Viet Coffee shops. Its the conservatism of Vietnamese culture which produces 18yo virgins. These virgins are actually more flirty than other girls, because they have less insights into the ramifications and into how guys see them.
Highly recommended. When he wants to be, Bertolucci can be really sweet. Lots of insights in this, in my opinion:
https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0117737/
GF and BF are really adolescent terms, again, created in the 20th Century, and part of the ongoing conflict about adolescent sexuality.
Having an adult SO is probably not very far off for you. Its just that as I see it, college can be a very negative environment. If you looked to town girls, probably no problem. But it does take time and money, and there are emotional demands.
I explained before how in college I had to let my town GF go. Actually she was two years older than me and had graduated from the college and was now employed as administrative staff. But she lived 10 miles away and she no longer operated on school schedules. She wanted to be fucked every night, and for largely emotional reasons. No way I could do that and keep up with school demands.
In many ways she was a very pleasant breath of fresh air. We talked and she explained that at a certain age women stopped playing games. Mostly I think it is just a matter of being out of college.
But there were other emotional demands in her though, things I was not ready for. I still respect her, much more so than some of those I dealt with in the college environment.
Anyway, clearly you are feeling pressure and frustrations. You might want to make some life style changes. But I say it would be wrong for you to let such frustrations press you into reckless interpretations, like this Autism-Asperger's assessment, or into trying to do something strange via P4P.
Yes puberty comes earlier today. People say it is because of better nutrition. But you see my point then, there was no adolescence as puberty meant adulthood. Just like it is in primitive societies.
Adolescence and the conflicts about adolescent sexuality are something invented in the 20th century, really by capitalism.
In the 50's and earlier it was "heavy petting". And clearly this is a very slippery situation. In traditional societies young people are chaperoned, and adulthood comes much earlier. So such situations do no occur.
But a lot depended upon socio-economic status, and that is often highly influenced by race. Over time sexual freedom has advanced, but this is far from universal, and then college seems to be a detriment.
I remember a TV news spot, something about condom samples being given out, like 2 of them. Guy at Stanford said, "In a school like this, that's a full year's supply."
And then I read Nicole's posts, and the situation does not sound like it would be pleasant for anyone.
Adolescent sexuality is still a very controversial issue.
So you say that you look young for your age, and that you always have. Could well be. I've known lots of people like that. Really not a big deal. Roommate in college, people used to call him Howdy Dowdy. I got him his first job.
His younger brother in college, people used to call him Wonder Bread.
Some of it is just what a guy looks like. Not an issue.
Other, its just the situation and how one is dressed.
And then a huge factor is just what sorts of life experience a guy has. Real work experience, where power, money, and politics are in play, that really changes a guy. And people start to react to him differently.
Single young women really throw themselves at older married men.
Same women shun recently divorced men, as it really shows in them.
Not sure where you are going with this apparent age issue. I hope this is not another part of the Autism-Asperger's interpretation.
I hope you have got to watch the above Sami Timimi video. No biological basis for even the concept. No clinical usefulness in the assessment. Far more important to talk about what is going on in that person's life which would move them to seek such an assessment.
Hans Asperger signed to send thousands of children to be euthanized. He avoided the hangman's noose though by being able to cover up his involvement with the Nazi's.
Assessment rates have exploded today, like 100x what they once were. This is the effect of Neo-liberalism. They see everyone as a cog in an economic machine, and so they need these special categories available.
I worry CC99 that you are being influenced by a female who is strongly committed to this reactionary movement known as neo-liberalism / libertarianism. She is attached to it, but really is is just a kind of judgementalism. And in a very similar manner, she is committed to Autism-Aspergers. It is a core part of her reality. And her understanding of any of this is extremely limited.
You want an assessment, okay:
CC99, a highly intelligent young man, applying himself in college right now, and with seeming definite plans. Much more intelligent than most of the people he meets, and even so in the college.
Coming out of an affluent environment, and as such sheltered from much of life.
Principled and thoughtful, not really interested in flowing with the herd.
Facing a certain amount of risk of being pressured into seeing something wrong with himself, in that conformist environment of elite colleges. Age, socio-economically, and racially segregated to a large degree. People's compete for the claim that they are the representatives of their age set. Not a nice environment, not good at all.
Today Autism-Aspergers is a huge industry. No actual evidence behind it. Assessment serves no purpose.
Another book very critical of it, written by lots and lots of people, view points run from critical to radical, click on Look Inside:
https://www.amazon.com/Re-Thinking-Autis…
SJG
David Harvey on post-neoliberalism, Trump, infrastructure, sharing economy, smart city
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wb6rhHyJ…
Kabbalah, Magic & the Great Work of Self Transformation: A Complete Course
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B001JE…
A Brief History of Neoliberalism by David Harvey 1/5
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PkWWMOzN…
Sammy Hagar - Standing Hampton - 1981
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eZqC1z87…
Robin Trower - Bridge Of Sighs (Full Album) HQ Sound 480p/HQ
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q2afD0B0…
People must have been really fucking sexually frustrated because pre-marital sex was pretty taboo back then. Most people didn't do it unless they were fairly certain they were going to marry that person. This was the basis for shotgun weddings, since a lot of younger people back then put off actually getting married until it became an "emergency" to cover up pre-marital sex.
If you look at historical literature used as "evidence" for how young women got married back then, you actually discover when you read about the context surrounding it that it was intentionally done to stir up controversy or to give a message to young audiences. For example, Romeo and Juliet.
William Shakespeare's drama Romeo and Juliet puts Juliet's age at just short of fourteen years; the idea of a woman marrying in secret at a very early age would have scandalized Elizabethans. The common belief in Elizabethan England was that motherhood before 16 was dangerous; popular manuals of health, as well as observations of married life, led Elizabethans to believe that early marriage and its consummation permanently damaged a young woman's health, impaired a young man's physical and mental development, and produced sickly or stunted children. Therefore, 18 came to be considered the earliest reasonable age for motherhood and 20 and 30 the ideal ages for women and men, respectively, to marry. Shakespeare might also have reduced Juliet's age from sixteen to fourteen to demonstrate the dangers of marriage at too young of an age; that Shakespeare himself married Anne Hathaway when he was just eighteen (very unusual for an Englishman of the time) might hold some significance.
Now it should be noted that from Medieval Times to the 18th and 19th century, the average age of marriage got higher. I'm convinced that people in Medieval Times specifically may have actually reached puberty earlier than people later did due to various examples of teenagers having adult roles in Medieval Times. Why this is the case I'm not sure yet though. One thing they have in common however is that neither medieval times nor the 19th century really recognized adolescence as a stage of life.
I think though that we should consider adolescence and young adulthood as a stage of life. It gives people a chance to experiment with the "fun" parts of adulthood without having serious consequences possibly unfold on them if they make a mistake. Some people are also just not quite ready to grow up yet.
None of this will help you get laid.
Hitting the gym or dating autistic girls will.
Get a diagnosis (negative or positive) and work with clinical professionals who aren't anonymous guys on a strip club message board. My 2 cents.
If you want to stop being awkward then just learn how not to be. Even sociopaths learn how to mimic normal human behavior in order to blend in.
Honestly, I'm tied of hearing your whiny excuses about why you can't do or have xyz. Maybe the real problem here is that your father didn't teach you to man up and take personal responsibility. My diagnosis is the same - you need to hit the gym and maybe the occasional bar. Getting more physically attractive and being forced to learn to mingle with others will both help you on the female front. Who knows, maybe you'll get more self confidence after taking home a few bar pigs resulting from beer goggles. It's time to stop sitting here on the computer over-analyzing your lack of social skills and instead get out there and start to fix it.
Sociopaths are literal experts at looking normal, having social skills, and blending in, they are sociopaths because they are freakishly good at lying to people and presenting a socially acceptable image of themselves. One of the most common traits of autism is that autistic people rarely lie and if they do lie are very bad at it. So don't give me that bullshit insinuating that if sociopaths can act normal I should be able to as well. I have tried to "act normal" before, it is emotionally exhausting, I can only do it for so long before it becomes really frustrating.
And don't fucking come at my father, unlike you my father doesn't feel a constant need to prove his masculinity by acting like an overgrown version of an early 20s dudebro bragging about how many girls he fucks and insulting anything resembling feminine traits in other guys. Yeah he does go to the gym, and he watches and loves sports, but for him, providing my mom and his kids with the best life possible is his most important goal. As far as I'm concerned, all he's said about that is "well not everybody's meant to be a tough guy." The last thing my dad or my mom wants though is for me to turn into some fuckboy who goes around acting cocky and douchey towards girls, even if it would make me more successful. All of the people in my life who I've respected the most told me "don't ever change yourself for other people, don't ever become one of those guys who's cocky and arrogant around girls. There's way too many of them, the world needs people like you."
What was the original topic?
Oh yeah. On a question like this perhaps it would be better to ask, get a few responses, and then when it goes off the rails or gets negative, let it go.
My humble 2 cents.
Though, I'm not holding my breath.
CC has his HS GFE
Or
SJG visits TJ
So you think it's about the laptop?
Lol.
Nice straw man argument. Nobody suggested that you swing from one extreme to the other, just that you toughen up a bit and force yourself to do things that make you uncomfortable until they get easier. And as far as those people who you respect, did it ever occur to you that some of them were patronizing you? If they truly believed that the world needs more people like you then why aren't they living the way you are? ;)
But again, if there is one thing I've learned in this life, it is that someone who is determined to be a victim will always be one.
CC99,
I'm not going to waste time arguing about statistics. The book I suggested has been a standard college text for decades now. Yes, I guess it does vary from country to country, and from class to class. They are mostly talking about the US and people of middle income ranges. Before the 20th Century, the vast majority of people did not go to school beyond the 8th grade. High school back then was just College Prep, and only for the wealthy who were college bound.
So with later puberty, and with no high school, that leaves little room for adolescence.
And then the book also echos what is widely written everywhere, go back far enough and 14yo was the age of majority. 21yo for voting meant that you had been an adult for 7 years. And Article 2 specifies 35yo for POTUS.
So 14yo's went into the work force, and they were allowed to marry. The US has never had much child betrothal.
And consider how this would look to the parents of a girl, for obvious reasons they would want to get her married ASAP.
Romeo and Juliette is difficult to stage because of how young the parties are presumed to be. More likely that only those so young would disregard the operative social conflicts. So it makes for an interesting story.
My point in saying all of this is simply to impress upon you that adolescence is a very contrived situation, as even more so is adolescent romance. And then adolescent sexuality is still a very controversial area.
It might interest you to know that long long ago, in college, I had for a brief time an autistic GF. Or I should say now, she had been convinced that she had autism.
But at that time I knew nothing about this and would not have made this distinction. Still though, I did think it unwise to get too involved with her. More than anything it was because she lived in this special residential school.
She was as communicative as anyone else. She was very engaging, very real. But she would not have lasted long in adolescent girl culture, no tight clothes, no make up, no bombshell hair. No guile. She was just who she was, always. She would probably have been a target. This may be why she ended up in that school.
There was one other thing about her though which I think does explain some. She had strabismus in one eye. So particularly with a girl, that will be the first thing people notice about her, and this fact I believe would deeply influence her.
Not too many years back, a girl at a public computer turned and asked me to help her. Clearly she was trying to flirt. First sight of her full face and I saw the same one eye strabismus. It put me off. The girl saw how I reacted. I was going to help her, but she angered and sent me away.
This kind of thing really does influence one's experience of life.
With my sort term autistic GF, I could see that she lived in a strange disability world, and as such was at a huge social disadvantage. I knew that that was wrong, and I was greatly bothered by it.
Today the concept of Autism - Aspergers is propagated by these creepy doctors, and by Munchhausen's By Proxy parents. As far as I can see, there is no punishment too server for dealing with such people.
Dr. Lynn Kern Koegel, UC Santa Barbara
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYQ0R6pS…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5n9vlBtb…
In France and Latin America they refuse to have anything whatsoever to do with the above sort of stuff.
Its not that far back that Arizona removed 5 children over this idea that they had autism and needed all these treatments. Pediatricians with the Phoenix Children's Hospital ended up testifying in court against their own doctors who had made the assessments. The parents had fooled dozens of doctors to even get to where they were, and this was the reason that the head of Pediatrics got involved to remove the children, before they could just go to another state and start over.
Autism is an industry, it is very controversial. Read the materials I have suggested.
This idea of Applied Behavioral Analysis, and electrical shocks and other "aversives" started with Ole Ivar Lovaas, at UC Los Angeles. And he had started his work trying to use the same methods to convert children away from homosexuality. Today in CA, this would be unlawful. But it still goes on in various forms with Autism. If left up to me, even back then, Lovaas would not even get a trial. He is our own version of Josef Mengele.
In Silicon Valley, I guess starting with this Wired Magazine, and coming from one idiot of an author, autism - aspergers has been made into a kind of chic, based on the idea that it gives one special abilities with computers. This is refuted by Sami Timimi and his co-authors.
It is also dealt with at length here.
Clearly you have an interest in demographics and history. Well this book does an outstanding job of tracing all of this out.
https://www.amazon.com/Constructing-Auti…
Are we going to have special category labels for those who are left handed, have red hair, or have green eyes?
Autism-Aspergers is a concept none of us should ever reinforce. The only purpose it serves is to legitimate the abuse of children and adults.
Also an outstanding and now widely referenced book:
https://www.amazon.com/War-Autism-Corpor…
Meeting intimate partners is always best done face to face, not by online referral systems, or by escort ads either.
You know from personal experience that one meets all sorts of people, people of all different temperaments and communications styles.
Invariably you will form impressions about people, and about who it is you would most likely get along with. Follow these feelings and impressions about people you meet. These will lead to good results.
SJG
Mary J. Blige, U2 - One
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpDQJnI4…
There was one other thing about her though which I think does explain some. She had strabismus in one eye. So particularly with a girl, that will be the first thing people notice about her, and this fact I believe would deeply influence her.
Does stabismus mean that her one eye was between her titties.... cause I would notice that first
Did she have a dead eye or were they crossed like she had been sucking too many big dicks
If you're not on the spectrum, you have to work on yourself. That's the only viable solution. Work on yourself physically... it'll help build confidence, and start fucking whatever you can to build some experience and get comfortable with girls.
SJG
I'm not sure why you read it to begin with.
"I look forward to the day when CC posts about how enjoyed his HS GFE.
Though, I'm not holding my breath."
Even I don't expect this to be possible until after graduation. The reason being that I have a $3,000 debt that I gotta pay off right now and after that I will need to build up the funds to finance this. I suspect a year from now though that I will still have a very youthful appearance. My appearance has barely changed at all since I was 17.
"We should have a TUSCL pool going of which happens first:
CC has his HS GFE
Or
SJG visits TJ"
That would actually be really funny.
"Nobody suggested that you swing from one extreme to the other, just that you toughen up a bit and force yourself to do things that make you uncomfortable until they get easier. And as far as those people who you respect, did it ever occur to you that some of them were patronizing you? If they truly believed that the world needs more people like you then why aren't they living the way you are? ;)"
They are living this way, their outcomes were different but their actions support their words. A couple of those people were my parents, they support semi old fashioned ideas of chivalry and romance but mix it with modern parenting styles. One of them was a stripper who was a favorite of mine, I'm friends with her on Facebook, the guy she's married to looks like a pretty nice guy. Another one was a friend of mine. He can't really get girls either.
"Beta Cuck you’ve been in college 3 years and haven’t learned shit! Get money, get girls drunk, find the one that will sleep with you, distract her from the she-herd, take home, cum on her face. It’s that simple."
I have learned that money is important. As for the rest of that stuff, I'm aware that that lifestyle exists. I just don't want to be a part of it. I don't really like a lot of the personality traits and general behavior that go along with most of the girls engaged in that lifestyle. A lot of them act so fucking trashy that they're not attractive to me anymore even if their bodies are objectively attractive. I mean, this is actually how most of them act...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8qZHw60d…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eKkmKq5P…
Can you see why I'm not exactly eager to be all over that? Most of them act like they're on Jersey Shore or some shit. They don't all act like that, but the majority absolutely do. I like for a girl to be girly and sweet with a cute vibe that inspires me to feel protective towards her. I enjoy the personalities and behavior of strippers way more than the typical college aged party girls. There are trashy strippers sure but there's also lots of young cute strippers, motherly strippers, and classy stripper girls. If I'm going to have a casual sexual relationship with a girl, I want it to be with a stripper or perhaps a party girl who doesn't act like a typical one. A romantic relationship can be with any girl who's cute and sweet.
That's fine. So, go find women who aren't that. They're out there. It's similar to when guys come on here because they are wrapped around the axle with a particular stripper or a particular club. The standard (good) advice is 'go find another stripper' or 'go to another club'.
It seems like a good chunk of your struggles is you going down this deep rabbit hole of analysis paralysis. Do less of that and take more active, incremental steps to improve your situation.
And don't take this place so seriously or personally.
But the guy looks like an emaciated albino elf. I think he gave them money or drinks to kiss him coz he's that fugly and annoying AF. If he can do it, anyone can....LMFAO
I think you're just digging for any excuse to legitimate inaction now. You want girls to approach you and take the lead like hookers or strippers do, and that's just not going to happen. They're performing a service, a hookup or relationship isn't a service .....and even those hoes and strippers like men to act like men, in their personal lives.
If its the shyness, work on it....
Its so fucking trashy. I can't believe you don't see it. I see them walking around everywhere during the daytime hours and they pretty much still act like that, they still have that attitude. Its not alcohol. Furthermore, I've seen nice girls get drunk, they don't start acting that way just because they got drunk. Alcohol just releases what is already inside you that you're afraid to be truthful about its not like it actually changes you.
If you don't like em, go for different types. You had one girl you liked but won't try with her either.
It has the effect of feeling like it can last for all eternity.
A lot of times it is just triggered by external circumstances. Like cases I know of, a girl just graduating from college, traveling thousands of miles to live with her sister for a while. Another, a girls who was out of college for a while, but still lived with her parents, traveling even further to spend some months living with her GF to attend her wedding.
In both cases you have girls who have no real responsibilities, they are just like tourists. So things happen and it feels like it can last forever, but it does not, it just fucks people up.
CC99, bullying, ostracizing, terrorizing, othering, these have been around for the longest of times. It runs highest when you have these age segregated schools, not in one room school houses.
In its current form it is all a product of capitalism and the middle-class family, and then radicalized by neo-liberalism.
Maybe in preschool through grade K, the bullies seemed to be at the top of the social hierarchy. But as the kids get older, the bullies are themselves marginalized, and it is another contingent, one which is better at managing the impressions of the adults, who emerge at the top of the hierarchy. The bullying is still there, its just that different kids are doing it, and it is done in more subtle ways.
And then in college, you have this social hierarchy headed by the fraternities and sororities. They are the new bullies, they just do it in a completely different way.
And then so now as we have this idea of this Autism- Aspergers Spectrum. That does not cause bullying or ostracizing. Rather, is because some want to bully and ostracize and place themselves over others, that we have this Autism-Apserger's Spectrum. The bullies can be kids, but more often than not they are teachers, doctors, and parents. So it is important not to cooperate with those who promote this in any manner or at any time.
SJG
Deep Purple - Anya (from Come Hell or High Water)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fvPtsSFE…
And all he really needs is to just get some life experiences....
I agree that autism spectrum diagnoses are troubling and often made for the sole purpose of selling meds... when the real problem is just poor socialization and the subsequent lack of social skills. But full blown autism is a problem...although he doesn't have it.
And no one needs and remedial socialization instruction.
And college can suck.. I want to read how it was for Michel Foucault.
SJG
Deep Purple
Knocking At Your Back Door (Live)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OU8TZ00k….
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JH1c02aM…
Smoke on the Water
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y5y7vCTB…
That sounds wonderful.
Someone can enter your life like they walked out of your dreams and make you feel like you never knew you could. You build a life with them, then like a dream..... you wake up and they're gone. Everything you had disappears... That's the reality of love. Its a never ending cycle of pain.
CC99, Thing is, it does not last forever.
Sure, Romantic Comedy movies usually end in marriage. But those movies are neurotic.
My ex-wife, by the time I met her, all her her high school GF's had been married and had it totally disintegrate and end in divorce.
It is always like this for women, they want marriage, to them this is still their main determinant of social status. But even as they are pushing for this, they know people who are as young as they are and in the middle of a marriage disintegration. They are willing to destroy their own lives and the life of someone else, just for a fantasy.
Teenage Romance might be good if it were quick and could be then ended easily with no lasting harm.
My organization will have a provision for something like this.
SJG
SJG
SJG