You might be a pathetic loser if?

Countryman5434
I entered the dragon and was never the same
You open up a separate bank account just for mongering.

101 comments

Latest

  • pistola
    6 years ago
    If you're married this is smart.
  • reverendhornibastard
    6 years ago
    ... you think strippers like you because you’re a nice guy

    ... you think you and your stripper friend are simpatico just because you have matching misspelt tattoos

    ... you have ever financed a lap dance (putting it on a credit card counts)

    ... you paid more for a 30 minute OTC escapade than you paid for your education

    ... you get lap dances at the club from a relative because she gives you a family discount
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    you let girls sell you dances, and you try to cum in your pants.

    SJG
  • Nidan111
    6 years ago
    Fall in love with a stripper.
    Purchase anything of real value for your stripper (car, rings, coats, boobs).
    Believe anything they tell you regarding their affection for you other than their true affection for the bulge in your pants (aka, WALLET).
  • Cristobal
    6 years ago
    Buy lapdances/VIP from a known ROB
  • Book Guy
    6 years ago
    ... if you get a separate "burner" non-traceable cell phone strictly for stripper mongering-oriented contacts.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    The bouncer who met you for the first time two years ago greets you at the door by saying "you're still not 21 yet?"
  • JackScott
    6 years ago
    OK. My name is Jack and I'm a PL. (crowd says, "Hi Jack!") I've done everything on this list. Well... almost everything except the "family discount".
  • pistola
    6 years ago
    If you're in college surrounded by hot trim fit young tail everywhere ripe for unprotected sex and instead you spend your life posting on TUSCL...
  • JAprufrock
    6 years ago
    You dream of front-room makeout sessions and building imaginary organizations and need to inflate your date after several uses.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    As if Pistola could do any better lmao. You're on here paying strippers and sugar hookers same as I am. Funny how none of you guys who brag so much seem to acknowledge that. RickDugan once said "if I wasn't married, I'd be sucking and fucking civie women all the time."

    About the most pathetic excuse I've ever heard. Being married doesn't seem to be stopping Dugan from fucking all these strippers across the country. Why doesn't he try going into a college bar with a white suit and pretend to be a chemical engineer? Worked for Barney Stinson right?
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    If you hang out on sites like TUSCL and in clubs when you routinely have hot chicks drop off food and gifts as well as text and leave notes on your door begging you to hang out, have fun and hookup.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    ^Our next troll profile.
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    ...women ask “What’s a guy like you doing in a place like this?” Uh, what’s a girl like you doing in a place like this? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

    ...strippers ask if you’re going to visit them at the club everyday.

    ...strippers routinely fight over the bulge in your pocket aka your wallet.

    ...your direct deposit goes to your CF/club instead of your own bank account.

    You might be a cheap bastard, pathetic loser if...

    ...you walk into the club and peacock with a hundred dollar bills hanging halfway out your pocket like you’re the man instead of a hundred Benjamin’s.

    ..you walk into the club and peacock with a hundred dollar bills hanging halfway out your pocket like you’re the man and you walk out the club with a hundred dollar bills before tour woman finds money missing and you used a coupon to get into the club free during happy hour.
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    You might be a stupid rich, pathetic loser if...

    ...you have to hire a assistants, accountants, lawyers, and tax specialists to coordinate your mongering.

    ...your chauffeur drives you to a spa, you pay $79 for an hour long amp visit, get charged with two misdemeanors as part of an eight month long, sex trafficking sting, own an NFL team, are reportedly worth more than $6B and get off with a slap on the wrist.
  • flagooner
    6 years ago
    @pistola. LMFAO
  • doctorevil
    6 years ago
    If your name is rickdugan aka Ricky Boy aka Ricky Douchebag, in which case you’re just a plain ole pathetic loser instead of a Pathetic Loser.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @pistola LMAO you are mistaking this thread as the "you just might be a beta cuck if..." one. But still, well played. CC99 was obviously triggered LOL.
  • Hank Moody
    6 years ago
    CC, with every post you scream out how naive you are. Stop declaring truth re things about which you know nothing.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    ^You actually think that anybody who makes going to strip clubs and paying hookers into a lifestyle is a casanova type guy who can pickup a hot girl whenever he feels like it? That screams naivety way more than anything I say.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    You're a married man paying hookers for sex

    You save up your social security checks for a trip to Tijuana

    You spend your social security check paying strippers to make you cum in your pants

    You associate the word sex with P4P
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    Being a conservative/Republican who cheats on his wife with hookers but preaches values and ethics
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    ^ LMAO what screams naivete the most is CC blaming society for his own inability to get laid in civie life. It's as simple as that but he deflects on this issue. LOL nobody is saying they are a Casanova. The real issue is that CC is a pathetic loser with no game but blames society for this. Talk about pathetic excuses!
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    LMAO @IceyLoco what about all this that you admittedly spent on your stripper ho "GF"? LMAO you spent more than most tricks. All this makes you pretty pathetic:

    "Yeah, Im fine with the sugar daddy aspect. Im not naive to think she'd be with me if I were broke."

    "Don't care where I met her and have no problem spending the money, its not an issue."

    "And I agree, its really weird that she would cut off the $$$. You'd think she'd want to push it. And at this stage while I know itll hurt in the long run, Id be down with it. She knows I'll spend it on her.It was pretty much like we were living in a hip hop video...materialistically, it was there for her. Designer shoes, bags, clothes, the best weed, expensive restaurants. She grew up poor and likes fast money..."

    "Im hoping if nothing else, she misses the money. She won't find this elsewhere...it was a lot. A few hundred a day, some days over a thousand."

    "... I'd even be fine with it just being about money if she just stays and acts normal."
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    Being a geriatric troll on TUSCL
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    Thinking hookers and strippers love their jobs
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    You might be an ugly, pathetic loser if..,

    ...girls tip you to leave.

    ...you meet a hot, young geriatric nurse who cleans dirty, sticky, stinky, sweaty balls of every man she meets but she won’t touch your Johnston.
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    You might be a pathetic loser if?
    You’re a douchebag in a three piece white polyester suit......... oops that’d just make you a loser

    You might be a pathetic loser if?
    You’re a woman posting as a pimp........... oops again that just makes you a loser
  • flagooner
    6 years ago
    LOL
  • Hank Moody
    6 years ago
    CC, stated more directly, don’t question why married people do what they do until you’ve been married ten years. Or at least go on a second date. You have no perspective.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    You think his wife if she heard about it would breathe a sigh of relief and go like "oh thank god he is fucking strippers and not floozies from a college bar."

    He is fucking strippers specifically because he needs to pay a girl in order to have sex just like all of us do.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    No one needs to pay for it. 1s to 3s need sex too.
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    You might be a sack of meat, pathetic loser if...

    ...your motto is more motion in the ocean.

    ...you use flour to find the wet spot.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    CC99 posted -> "...he needs to pay a girl in order to have sex just like all of us do."

    ^ an excellent example of you talking out of your ass because you are still naive as fuck.

    Some of "us" don't pay strippers for sex and go home and fuck our wives or significant others.

    But you wouldn't know about either of these things. LOL as stated, get some perspective before you start speaking for "us".
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    You might be a redneck, pathetic loser if...

    ...your girls bleat, moo, or oink/squeal.
  • Cristobal
    6 years ago
    @JimmyMcNulty

    "... don’t question why married people do what they do until you’ve been married ten years. Or at least go on a second date..."

    LMAO.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    So you're acknowledging that for a huge percentage of guys. Perhaps around 40%, Their choices are basically...

    Obese civie women.
    Prostitutes
    Sex dolls/robots
    A combination of the above
    Or celibacy?

    Otherwise they cannot get laid unless they got very lucky? Choosing one of these choices over the other is more an indication of personality and preference rather than being more of a loser than the other choices.

    If this is the case. I think prostitutes are easily the best choice. It might not be for someone with less money though, someone who doesn't particularly care if their sexual partner is an actual woman, or for someone who isn't all that horny. Furthermore, can we really blame a guy for being in a similar position as 40% of the male population is?
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    That was directed to IceyLoco.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    LMAO CC99 really needs to start chubby chasin'
  • Cristobal
    6 years ago
    @SirLapdancealot

    And go on a 2nd date
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @Cristobal LMAO the "truth" about CC99 is finally coming out. He claims he's emotionally suffering and can't get laid but yet now in this thread he admits to having the option of being with an obese woman. He also claims that he wants an emotionally meaningful relationship and not one just for sex but yet in this thread he admits to choosing a prostitute over an obese woman.

    So LMAO by his own logic he could easily get laid AND possibly have an emotional relationship with an obese woman. But he chooses prostitutes as if it is the only "logical" path for a pathetically pathetic loser such as himself.
  • Cristobal
    6 years ago
    @SirLapdancealot

    Nothing wrong with chubby chasing, chubby girls need love too.

    And some can be quite grateful.

    My opinion only, not every lay has to be a trophy lay.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    @Cristobal

    Nothing wrong with chubby chasing. I've certainly considered it, but then realized that if we had sex, that it was going to be an extremely embarrassing thing for both of us. My performance would be so bad that she would know that its because I don't find her attractive, in which case its going to be extremely embarrassing for both of us because she's going to realize she just fucked a guy who had no attraction to her and god knows what will happen as a result of that. Its better that I not put us in that position to begin with.

    My point is that this fantasy world that many TUSCLers have created in their minds, that we live in a world where guys can just go out and have sex with whoever they want whenever they want without paying for it is just that, a fantasy, for the vast majority of guys. Only 20% of the male population can really live like that easily. Another 40% have moderate difficulty getting laid but can usually manage. The bottom 40% has extreme difficulty and has to choose between the 5 options I presented. For them, having sex with even an average looking civie girl is not a realistic option to pursue most of the time. If it does happen, its because they got very lucky.
  • Countryman5434
    6 years ago
    You got to a strip club get dances and then go across the street to a latina mp and get laid lol
  • Cristobal
    6 years ago
    @cc99

    I respect your opinion and observations.

    I personally don't worry about statistics, about what could happen, I just go out and try to make things happen for me.

    The only way to hit a homerun is to swing for fences, not to worry about your batting average or OBP.

    If you want to fuck a chubby girl, fuck a chubby girl, enjoy her company, don't sell yourself short before you even try, that's pathetic.

    If you fail to achieve your goal, learn from it, adjust your method, and most of all:

    Enjoy this experience we call life.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    CC99, once one is out of college, most of what girls seem to judge guys buy is how they are dressed, the nature of their employment, and their general attitude and demeanor. Once one learns this, getting girls becomes rather easy.

    SJG
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    ^^^^ Most women want to be married. So they don't play too hard to get.

    SJG
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    @CC99 I'm saying that men should stay within their league to find most of their sex partners. I still think its very much an unmerited sense of entitlement when men expect women they know are out of their league. If a man wants them, he should transform himself to attract them.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    and SJG is right
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    Well here's the thing.

    I know for a fact I am not physically repulsive. I am not ugly. I am actually slightly above average looking in the face even though I'm pretty thin. I can say with a lot of confidence that I am a 6. There have been a lot of girls who grind on me at parties or make out with me but I soon realized I am essentially a party prop, I was there, they wanted to grind on somebody and the hot guys were already taken. None of them were enthusiastic enough to see me again though.

    Basically I feel that I inspire indifference from girls. They aren't enthusiastic about fucking me but it's not like the idea repulses them. That's why prostitution actually works pretty well for me because it eliminates the shyness factor but also exposes girls to my personality in a way that nightclubs don't. After knowing more about me, I feel like they'll have a good idea of me.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @CC99 posted -> "we live in a world where guys can just go out and have sex with whoever they want whenever they want without paying for it is just that, a fantasy, for the vast majority of guys."

    ^ It appears that only you live with this fantasy understanding, again probably due to your ignorance and naivete. I don't see any guy on TUSCL except you blathering on and on about it.

    Most guys can get laid in college every now and then. That is all. It's not anything more like what you are ASSUMING.

    Maybe you have to just realize that you are as unattractive to the women that you want to fuck, just like the unattractive obese woman that you don't want. It doesn't need to be any more complicated than this.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    ^^^^^ Again, I think what you are describing is just a college phenomenon. The women don't want relationships, not at that stage. And they see a guy who is not yet established in a high powered professional career as still not eligible.

    Outside of college they are completely different. But this can mean hell for a young man, and it can mean his education being cut short.

    SJG
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    "Well here's the thing.

    I know for a fact I am not physically repulsive. I am not ugly. I am actually slightly above average looking in the face even though I'm pretty thin. I can say with a lot of confidence that I am a 6."

    ^ Well here's the thing.

    Your rating of yourself doesn't count at all. What counts is how attractive women find you on all levels.

    So maybe to other women you're really not a "6"...jes sayin'...
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    ^^^^^^ You find any girl, retail or office job, paying her own rent, not living with her parents, and inside you can know that she is about to explode.

    SJG
  • TheeOSU
    6 years ago
    You might be a pathetic loser if?
    You let your inner self AKA san_jose_gay escape, revealing your true inner desires before you're able to gain control of them and revert back to your manufactured persona. Lol
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    @CC I’m going to clue you in and I know this to be a fact, people in general don’t care for whiners. If y’all come across as a whiney little boy, girls are going to treat you that way, OTH cool comfortable people are attractive to both men and women, when you see someone comfortable in their own skin you naturally gravitate towards them, it’s not looks, it’s almost always personality, the best looking people that have a shitty personality get no better than the average looking people with no personality. Yet you can be average looking and shine through the force of your personality. I don’t care what anyone tells you this is reality.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    LMAO CC doesn't realize his whiny, insecure, and passive-aggressive personality is why he can't get laid. It's much easier for him to blame society instead. It goes with his personality.
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    ^ there’s more than few like that, difference is CC is really just a kid, the others are hopeless whiney fuckers. Always been always will be.
    Most of the good guys here are not, but you have that subset, that doesn’t know any better.
  • Nidan111
    6 years ago
    @CC99. As far as the guys having sex in college. I’m a guy. I am not a hunk of a guy. I was not a college athlete. I had the opportunity to get laid every day and I took the opportunity to do so when I had the time. Most (actually all) who did fuck me, wanted to over and over for months on end. I actually had to break off the fucking to make them quit. The reason that they wanted to fuck me was because I was able to TEACH THEM SOMETHING. I was able to get them to understand difficult academic concepts or I could teach them difficult self defense concepts; two completely different types of women/college girls, but ONE COMMON THEME. Brains and the ability to connect with them in ways that THEY needed me to connect. The EXACT same method applied to my after college days. The HOT women wanted to fuck simply because I was either Smart in their estimate or I was good at teaching them to defend themselves. Has worked for me since age 17 and still works for me today with all ages from 22 to 55 years old. Trust me, it’s all good in different ways. As far as being a PL, that is just one more way for me to CONNECT with a hot chick that I only want to play with for a short time, then move on with ease and no damn heart break drama.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    You're around women your age all day. They're all over campus. Parties are the least of it.

    Being with a hooker is nothing like being with a girl who is attracted to you.

    If you feel you inspire indifference in women, work on making yourself better... work on what you feel would inspire more in them.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Stay cool 25, Mamisan will be at your door any minute now.

    https://www.walmart.com/ip/Original-Diap…

    SJG
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Replying to Nidan111 and to IceyLoco,

    I think you will find a variety of situations in college. One thing which can make it difficult for a young man is just repression from the environment he is coming from. And college may not be the best place to redress that from, or to break out of it.

    Overall though I would still say that the Sexual Revolution is a fraud. Most people, and I think significatantly young women, will have sex before marriage. But very rarely is it a free love orgy. The rules typically followed are much more complex.

    For a young man, it seems to come down to social status, and there are many things which contribute to this. But it is not an issue of "Social Skills", as that is just a mind fuck.

    SJG
  • reverendhornibastard
    6 years ago
    @IceyLoco:

    “If you feel you inspire indifference in women, work on making yourself better... work on what you feel would inspire more in them.”

    1) put some great big tires on your pickup truck!

    2) get a couple of new inscrutable Japanese tattoos on your neck!

    3) take her to the local Waffle House for dinner and tell her she can order ANYTHING she wants this time!

    4) tell her the doctor says your gonorrhea has almost cleared up.

    5) learn to breathe through your ears!
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    ^ I’m guessing #5 is the winner ;)
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    CC99, I think it does come down to attitude, and that from experience. But as I see it, college is a horrible hindrance.

    And I know that that sucks.

    SJG
  • pistola
    6 years ago
    Nisan said it well. Beta Cuck you ain’t gonna get any if your idea of fun is sitting around smoking weed and pontificating on random shit, ideas, topics. Girls want to have fun and LIVE. That’s why their with dudes in college that drink, because at least those people are enjoying life. They hang around frats because there is social action, events, etc. Your theories are bullshit. Since you don’t have a pappy talking any sense into you, here it goes: ‘Son, get your beta cuck ass into the gym and go to some music shows and vacations and start inviting some women to join you. You’ll be amazed at the pussy you get.’
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    I rarely see girls who are attracted to guys because of his intelligence. If anything, I've noticed a strong correlation between intelligence and struggling with girls. My brother is really smart, he hasn't had a girlfriend in six or seven years and became suicidal over it. My cousin is really smart, he's been relying on an anime girl body pillow for over a year to feel sexual intimacy. SJG is intelligent and has also struggled. I'm intelligent and have also struggled. In-fact, I'd say its actually uncommon for me to meet a smart guy that doesn't struggle with girls. Some of them figure out how to overcome it, but they pretty much all have experience struggling in that area of life. Many of them considered learning how to attract girls to be the hardest thing they've ever done and so far that's been true of my life as well.

    Nidan I'm pretty sure you have very high levels of facial attractiveness and probably a normal body weight if you say you weren't athletic. I've also had girls ask to study with me and send them my notes and stuff like that, it never once lead to sex. They might be using "helping them with their homework" as an excuse to get closer to you, but its not like they really desperately needed help and became attracted to you upon helping them with their work.
  • pistola
    6 years ago
    ^Girls can smell that lack of self confidence a mile away. Go to the gym, it’s not just for muscles. It builds confidence.
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    "Son, get your beta cuck ass into the gym and go to some music shows and vacations and start inviting some women to join you. You’ll be amazed at the pussy you get."

    Again, you and IceyLoco and many others here continuously act like I've never done any of those things. I have not only done them but tried multiple times. It didn't work. What about that is so hard to understand. I've been to exactly 17 raves in my life and several other concerts, I've done almost every drug you can name besides meth and heroin, I used to party every weekend. I used to "live," I stopped living because it didn't get me anywhere. The only thing it got me was one cop's turned back away from a felony drug possession charge. At this point I'd rather just not expend the energy and watch TV and post on internet forums.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    LMAO 'Beta Cuck' is an understatement.
  • pistola
    6 years ago
    ^Right?

    Since I don’t want CC to kill himself, Betaboy try browsing through this: https://www.goodlookingloser.com/. There are plenty of places to look and learn versus complain.
  • Kajohnston
    6 years ago
    @C99 May I provide you some unsolicited advice?
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    I agree with the gym suggestion. A personal trainer can help you bulk up, get muscles. It builds confidence and that combo of confidence and a nicer body will get you laid.

    Women love smart men and intelligence in a man, but won't fuck you just coz you're smart or intelligent. Its what you do with it. Women want you to teach them things, make them feel taken care of, be told what to do. Its a major way of flirting for them.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    CC is no different than any other guy here in that he wants women that are out of his league.

    The difference is that he wallows in his misery about it and blames society like a beta cuck little bitch.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    funny site: https://www.goodlookingloser.com/

    Icey and Pistola,

    I think college is a big part of the issue here. Some types of college really do work against having any employment. And it would be that employment which gives a guy worldly experience.

    So body building may have some effect, but one cannot really do that when their life does not yet belong to them. For me in college it was bicycle riding. But that was more of a counter culture movement, than Self-Improvement.

    some types of college, they really are all encompassing.

    SJG
  • pistola
    6 years ago
    @Sjg, not sure I agree. I skated thru high school barely opening a book and getting high SAT scores. 1st year in college I was lost, 2nd year I joined a frat, got into the gym, and put myself out there and took risks. Had college friends like CC jealous of the fun I was having. Sure I gained lots of muscle at the gym, but it more about self confidence and a regimen than anything. That said, I was lucky that I had family help pay for college, but I worked a job 20-30 hrs a week to pay for everything else and had a full load of classes. You know who are DTF, waitresses and hostesses you work with. Lol. Cc just needs to drop the woe is me routine and change it up. And yeah that site actually does have some great advice.

    Gonna go back to calling him Beta Cuck tomorrow tho lol
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Many people do find college to be extremely demanding. There have been posts and PM's about this, guys feeling that college is not compatible with part time employment.

    Yes, it depends on the individual, but also on the school and on the program. Some programs are impacted, as many people on the outside wanting to get in, as there are on the inside trying to stay in.

    Can create a money problem, but it also creates a narrowness of experience problem too.

    SJG
  • Jascoi
    6 years ago
    I am a pl.

    pussy lover is my preferred definition.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    But colleges offer free events for students. You can go to sports events, university sponsored tailgating events, concerts, lectures, student group activities, etc. And if you live on campus there is always something going on in the dorms.

    Its not hard to go to those or ask a girl to go with you.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    Also, talking about geeky skinny white boys.... Very few men have more swag than....

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LWdJ7Dy-…
  • Book Guy
    6 years ago
    ... if you read ALL the comments on this thread before adding your own.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    "Its not hard to go to those or ask a girl to go with you."

    Some guys would never do that though, because those events and those people are not their events and their people. I certainly wouldn't. Maybe go by myself, try to hit on girls, but not invite a girl to go with me, no way!

    SJG
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    When I was in college there were always dance parties. The best ones were at the start of each term, and at the start of the school year. Easy to connect with girls. People more open minded and relaxed. Would not be like that as the term went on.

    SJG
  • Countryman5434
    6 years ago
    @ mister wonderful +100000000000
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    It would be easy though. You're both at school, may not know many people so you ask someone to go and hang out with you there. But okay, going by yourself and trying to meet someone is good too.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Well, going to the event alone shows pluck, because it is not my venue, not my people, but I can still go and steel one of their women.

    But I would not take a woman there, because it is not my people, not my venue, not a place where I have standing. So nothing to gain by taking her there. Better to take her someplace else, or just to stay home.

    SJG
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    I don't know, I know guys in college who have luck taking girls to different events on campus. Then afterwords they just hook up.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Totally different inviting a girl you know to an event, versus going alone and hoping to hook up with a girl.

    The second way is fine, enter enemy territory, requisition one woman.

    But after, that you take her other kinds of places.

    SJG

    Steely Dan @ Sony Music Center, NYC - Band & Crew Rehearsal
    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GAZ_TELK…
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    But its wrong to think of it as enemy territory when you're a part of the campus community too
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Icey, I think this is where you and I disagree, and this also gets into what CC99 has called homogeneous monoculture. It is the problem with many types of colleges, they are trying to force a kind of identity, and force participation in things where some are members, and some are not.

    As such it can most definitely be classified as enemy territory. And recognizing this is the first step in being able to defend ones self against it.

    SJG
  • CC99
    6 years ago
    @IceyLoco

    Its not like the whole school is some big happy family that all care about each other. Make no mistake about it, many of them are very competitive with you in a social and academic way. The way that party schools are, every single social thing you do is considered a "resource" that gives you social capital. Being able to drink a lot without vomiting or blacking out gets you social capital, going to the most parties gets you social capital, having more friends and acquaintances gets you more social capital, hooking up with more people gets you more social capital, having a vagina automatically gives you three or four times more social capital to start off with than having a penis.

    I tried "playing the game" in freshman and sophomore year, then got fed up with the artificiality of it all and decided to drop out of it and do my own thing.
  • 3131
    6 years ago
    @IceyLoco. Your first few posts this topic.... harsh! ( but lots of truths)
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    I have a very close friend who went to pretty competitive schools. Its like a game.... You have to make acquaintances in different groups, get people from different walks of life to sort of be your guide.

    For example, join an ethnic or religious group, meet a frat member who is part of student gov there, buddy up to them and let him show you around those groups. Use him to meet more people. Try to relate to them on their level. You get some notoriety/popularity. People may not like you but they'll acknowledge your presence which in turn makes them look like they know people and makes you look popular too.

    You can't stay in your comfort zone. College is like a gateway to adulthood or at least should be.... branch out, try to put yourself out there. But you have to work on your presence and confidence. You have to stand out, people have to notice you. You need confidence for that and have to work on yourself.

    In life, most people aren't your enemies...people you compete with are more partners than they are enemies. And if they are your enemies, outdo them.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    3131 thanks
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    CC99, but in reality, you can choose to make changes you want to make, or keep making excuses to legitimate your inaction.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    If you seriously want some advice on these thinks, ask me in private if you want.
  • MackTruck
    6 years ago
    If you can't afford the $5 lapperz
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    Icey, I cannot endorse your POV. These colleges and their social environments are places where power is deployed and manipulated. One must not be blind to this.

    Going with the flow amounts to keeping up with the jone's. It is all encompassing, and generally at odds with the real reasons one is in college in the first place.

    Now consider though that Community Colleges and CSU's are generally considered "Commuter Colleges", most don't live in on site dorms, and most have some employment. So under such conditions, the school is less totally encompassing. In my opinion, things could have gone better for Elliot Rodger if it were like that for him.

    But UC and most of the private schools, and the elite schools across the country are very much different. I feel that the social environments can be very negative.

    Now for me, I had one great room mate and I got into the bicycle club and did some bicycle racing at other schools. But I could not continue that into my later years.

    Overall, I would say that the social environment is a negative. What it comes down to is just an extension of adolescence, and then just eventually not being able to stand it any longer.

    SJG

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  • Icey
    6 years ago
    With any situation, you have to make the best of it and carve your niche out so you can function. If a person doesn't do that, they'll end up with a life long pattern of doing the same thing in any environment and situation.

    I don't believe people like Elliot Rodger are victims. He was a misogynistic murderer...motivated by his hatred of women and perceived social and sexual rejection.
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    ^^^^^^ Yes, but he was not born that way. I say he went with misogyny, cause it was presented to him, as was the idea of violent retribution. So in terms of how he must have been manipulated and used at some earlier time, I do see him as a victim.

    SJG
  • san_jose_guy
    6 years ago
    His primary motive was not hatred of women. That was just a view he learned via on line misogynist sources and came to accept. That was his major error, and error of interpretation. He blamed young women, but he failed to see that his social and civil standing had been already badly compromised.

    SJG

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