Strippers aren't regular women. Regular rules of engagement don't apply. I don't write anyone off but if we make plans, I have expectation that they won't show up so I plan to be somewhere I enjoy so my night isn't wasted.
Also I believe there is an alternate universe where even though my phone says sent....they don't get the message for days later....or even at all.
I never just completely cut them off unless I feel OTC will never happen between us for a first time. So in regards to waiting, I'll wait up to an hour if we're going to be meeting OTC whether first time or if we have before. Other than that if I'm texting them it's just to say hi and/or my attempt of keeping myself in their memory. In that case I don't too much care if they respond.
Generally strippers don't reply in a timely manner or don't at all. You could be texting one and all of a sudden she drops off and you might not hear from her again til you see her in the club.
Only text with 2 or 3 now, and I've learned not to "blow them off". I text and wait for a reply...I never take it personal and if I like them, I don't give up on an slow answered text. So far all have circled back, apologized and explained what happened.
I try not to put all my PL-eggs in one-basket - i.e. don't text them expecting to set something up that day or within an hour or two - I set low-expectations so I won't be disappointed/distressed - if they get back to me, then we'll set something up; else on to plan B, C , or D - but then again I'm a variety guy and rarely get hung-up on any one chick to the point "I have to have her or else I'll go mad"
It's Wednesday the 4th. I text a stripper "hey Sparkles, this is Shailynn and I'll be in town next week on Wednesday 11th and I'd like to see you. I can see you on Wednesday or Thursday. I'll txt you next week to remind you."
nothing....
nothing....
nothing....
Tuesday the 24th... txt by Sparkles "Hey babe I'm working tonight can you stop by?"
yeah that's what I deal with, so like Jedi Papi said, spread it out txt multiple babes.
I'm seeing one stripper OTC and cultivating possible OTC with three others, who work at three different clubs and don't know about each other. (It's safer that way!) Three of these four women usually answer my texts (or, in one case, Facebook PMs) the same day or maybe the next day, whereas the fourth seldom answers. However, she is so wonderful when I see her ITC -- she kisses me when I arrive, sits with me for a long time with lots of touchy-feely in both directions, and always gets me off in the VIP room in a variety of ways (BBBJ, HJ, TF) without expecting a huge tip -- that I would be an idiot not to keep her in the rotation, regardless of her poor communication.
We have to remember that these girls receive dozens of texts from customers every day and we're seldom as important to them as they are to us.
As has been said above - I understand that dancers operate on different levels of lateness and text replies. However - some can be surprisingly good with text replies. Most aren't very good when answering texts - so I keep my expectations low - and I hope to be surprised.
My ex atf taught me not to expect a quick return on texts. I can't tell you how many times I texted her and didn't get a reply for weeks. It chapped my ass at the start, holding her to civilian standards. Once I realized it was unrealistic to expect quick returns, it made things easier.
They will wait until they see you in the strip club and say they saw your texts but decided to wait until they saw you again. In other words she still wants your club money.
While it changes based on situation, my basic process is to send her the initial text, and if I don't hear back, text her again in a day or two at the very most; no more replies after that, I'm switching to other plans. I don't blacklist her or anything, but if she doesn't get back to me, I'm not going to re-text more than once and not waiting around too terribly long
I wait a year. maybe 18 months. A lot of jails don't let strippers use their cell phones, LOL!
When I used to give out a number several times I have run into the girl months later. You get the story about taking a break, etc. I almost always get the "I was in jail for my 5th DUI" vibe.
i've heard the " i never look at my text messages" excuse. "sometimes I forget to press send"
most strippers can't even keep the damn phone in service. they even lose them.
the one thing you will know for sure is that if they really want to stay in touch with you, they will text back.
I've heard the SS about wanting to see me outside the club for drinks or a movie, and they might text back, but never can keep appointments.
Depending on the time frame, I'll text "If I don't hear from you in X time, I'll need to make other plans." If they text me after that deadline, I always say "Sorry. Made other plans." After a few of those, their responsiveness usually improves.
@ call me Ishmael that is how I am trying to handle things anymore. I am usually too patient and that encourages the lack of response. I find it annoying when she initiates the the contact. With something like "hey babe, let me know the next time you will be in town and staying in a hotel" So I text the info she wants and try to set the time.
Nothing...
Nothing
Nothing...
Then hey babe when you coming to see me? Things that make you say arrrrgh
-->"i've heard the " i never look at my text messages" excuse. "sometimes I forget to press send"
most strippers can't even keep the damn phone in service. they even lose them"
For sure. I do think, though, that it's difficult for many of us older guys, to even remotely comprehend what's going on, on a young stripper's phone. These girls often have a wide circle of ... well, if not friends, at least acquaintances, and they keep in touch with a circle of scores of people through text. They get and receive many thousands of texts per month. Now add into that, the stripper/client relationship is far less important to her, than it is to us, in most cases.
In any case, many of these girls treat their friends and family the way they treat you -- missing texts completely, or sometimes not responding at all. We are at the bottom of the hierarchy, but only their BFFs and current fuck buddies are guaranteed timely responses, and even that's inconsistent.
A stripper I"m really close to has told me many times: if you text me at night and I don't text you back, make sure you text me again. If I'm out partying and drunk, I always check my texts as they come in, but usually won't respond when I'm drunk and always forget the next day. And by the time I wake up the next day, your text will be waaaay down on the text list (she'll have gotten a dozen texts from other people by then) AND since the text was already read, it won't show up as new. Then she showed me her phone, and sure enough it was true. She gets a LOT of texts.
Anyway, just some fun insight into what's going on, in many cases
If you want a significantly higher level of reliability, then switch to escorts. Dealing with *most* strippers is like herding rabid cats on crack, even if you don't put up with their SS.
Papi's method of have rock bottom expectations is the best way to go.
Not sure if you mean blow her off as in make other plans, or blow her off as in write her off and not bother with her again.
I guess in either case, the answer is highly variable on the circumstances and past experience and really isn't much different than interactions with others. If I want to hang out today and don't hear back soon I'll move on pretty quick. I won't get all butthurt about it or hold it against her, though I do notice those tendencies and will quickly stop thinking of her in those situations. If I'm planning a few days ahead, I don't mind waiting a day or two. Again, I don't get too upset about it but after a few instances I'll stop trying.
Experience plays a role too. Some girls respond back quickly when the answer is yes, but don't respond at all when the answer is no. So when a girl with that history doesn't get back to me quickly, I move on quickly. Those are also typically girls who can't/don't plan ahead. I text and we're hanging out in a few hours. Other girls never respond back the same day. They almost always get back to me the next day or the day after though. These are girls who do generally make and keep appointments. For some of them, its like clockwork. I can text noon or midnight and I'll get a text back the next day at 10am. If they break that pattern, all bets are off.
Like I said, its not really different than others. I have friends/family that respond quickly without fail, and others who take days if they ever get back to me. I guess looking at my own habbits, I do the same. There are people I'll text back as soon as I can and some I have on silent and will get back to if/when I feel like it.
There's a pecking order to a stripper's text contact list. That order varies by how well she knows the person, how much a friend she considers them, how mad she is at them, how much money they've spent on her, how much money she needs right now, what the texter is going to want from her in terms of sex, how much sex she's willing to give up to that person, and a host of other factors.
Any given PL's place in that pecking order can change day by day, even hour by hour, based on changes in those factors, and even the stripper wouldn't have a clear notion of where any individual PL falls in that pecking order if she were to actually think about it. Instead, it's a gestalt moment for her, when all those factors coalesce at the moment a PL texts or calls, and she decides "yeah, I'll respond right now," or "in a minute," or "maybe later if I think of it."
My ATF will still, to this day, sometimes respond back a day or two later as if no time at all has passed since I texted.
It is not just us, go to a club during shift change and listen to the aggravation of the floor manager trying to text strippers, and figure out which ones are really going to show up!
Most people prefer not to deal with "work stuff" when they are not at work (unless they have to) - IMO, outside the club these girls rather focus on their personal lives (kids/family/SO, or hanging/partying w/ their friends)
It varies a lot, but most seem to be as Papi mentioned, preferring not to text PLs outside of work. I had one which would only answer while at work, incredibly frustrating as I'd need a bit of notice to make plans to see her. Took me a longer time than I'd like to admit to realize that's what was happening. Once I knew it made sense why sometimes she'd respond in minutes, other times not for days or weeks.
Anyway, now I'm at the point where I know any text may go unanswered. Two (or three max) unanswered in a row over the course of a week (maybe two) is my cue to move on.
-->"If you want a significantly higher level of reliability, then switch to escorts. Dealing with *most* strippers is like herding rabid cats on crack, even if you don't put up with their SS. "
Right. To me, the level of unprofessionalism is precisely what makes OTC 1000x better than an escort. Strippers are 10x hotter than comparably priced escorts, and most will add in dinner, drinking, and even overnights for free -- that are not professionals, so they do not charge by the minute. If I think about the hottest stripper I've done an overnight with, the price for a comparably-hot escort would be 10x as much -- and that is not an exaggeration.
Of course, there's two sides to the unprofessional coin -- in order to get our hot stripper who doesn't bother charging extra for hours of her time, we have to deal with flakiness, lack of return texts, etc. Worth it!
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Also I believe there is an alternate universe where even though my phone says sent....they don't get the message for days later....or even at all.
Generally strippers don't reply in a timely manner or don't at all. You could be texting one and all of a sudden she drops off and you might not hear from her again til you see her in the club.
It's Wednesday the 4th. I text a stripper "hey Sparkles, this is Shailynn and I'll be in town next week on Wednesday 11th and I'd like to see you. I can see you on Wednesday or Thursday. I'll txt you next week to remind you."
nothing....
nothing....
nothing....
Tuesday the 24th... txt by Sparkles "Hey babe I'm working tonight can you stop by?"
yeah that's what I deal with, so like Jedi Papi said, spread it out txt multiple babes.
We have to remember that these girls receive dozens of texts from customers every day and we're seldom as important to them as they are to us.
When I used to give out a number several times I have run into the girl months later. You get the story about taking a break, etc. I almost always get the "I was in jail for my 5th DUI" vibe.
most strippers can't even keep the damn phone in service. they even lose them.
the one thing you will know for sure is that if they really want to stay in touch with you, they will text back.
I've heard the SS about wanting to see me outside the club for drinks or a movie, and they might text back, but never can keep appointments.
It's like Pavlov's stripper.
Nothing...
Nothing
Nothing...
Then hey babe when you coming to see me? Things that make you say arrrrgh
most strippers can't even keep the damn phone in service. they even lose them"
For sure. I do think, though, that it's difficult for many of us older guys, to even remotely comprehend what's going on, on a young stripper's phone. These girls often have a wide circle of ... well, if not friends, at least acquaintances, and they keep in touch with a circle of scores of people through text. They get and receive many thousands of texts per month. Now add into that, the stripper/client relationship is far less important to her, than it is to us, in most cases.
In any case, many of these girls treat their friends and family the way they treat you -- missing texts completely, or sometimes not responding at all. We are at the bottom of the hierarchy, but only their BFFs and current fuck buddies are guaranteed timely responses, and even that's inconsistent.
A stripper I"m really close to has told me many times: if you text me at night and I don't text you back, make sure you text me again. If I'm out partying and drunk, I always check my texts as they come in, but usually won't respond when I'm drunk and always forget the next day. And by the time I wake up the next day, your text will be waaaay down on the text list (she'll have gotten a dozen texts from other people by then) AND since the text was already read, it won't show up as new. Then she showed me her phone, and sure enough it was true. She gets a LOT of texts.
Anyway, just some fun insight into what's going on, in many cases
Papi's method of have rock bottom expectations is the best way to go.
I guess in either case, the answer is highly variable on the circumstances and past experience and really isn't much different than interactions with others. If I want to hang out today and don't hear back soon I'll move on pretty quick. I won't get all butthurt about it or hold it against her, though I do notice those tendencies and will quickly stop thinking of her in those situations. If I'm planning a few days ahead, I don't mind waiting a day or two. Again, I don't get too upset about it but after a few instances I'll stop trying.
Experience plays a role too. Some girls respond back quickly when the answer is yes, but don't respond at all when the answer is no. So when a girl with that history doesn't get back to me quickly, I move on quickly. Those are also typically girls who can't/don't plan ahead. I text and we're hanging out in a few hours. Other girls never respond back the same day. They almost always get back to me the next day or the day after though. These are girls who do generally make and keep appointments. For some of them, its like clockwork. I can text noon or midnight and I'll get a text back the next day at 10am. If they break that pattern, all bets are off.
Like I said, its not really different than others. I have friends/family that respond quickly without fail, and others who take days if they ever get back to me. I guess looking at my own habbits, I do the same. There are people I'll text back as soon as I can and some I have on silent and will get back to if/when I feel like it.
Any given PL's place in that pecking order can change day by day, even hour by hour, based on changes in those factors, and even the stripper wouldn't have a clear notion of where any individual PL falls in that pecking order if she were to actually think about it. Instead, it's a gestalt moment for her, when all those factors coalesce at the moment a PL texts or calls, and she decides "yeah, I'll respond right now," or "in a minute," or "maybe later if I think of it."
My ATF will still, to this day, sometimes respond back a day or two later as if no time at all has passed since I texted.
Texting and snapchats, etc are the ways of communication - and hot girls must get lots of dick pics texted to them daily!
Anyway, now I'm at the point where I know any text may go unanswered. Two (or three max) unanswered in a row over the course of a week (maybe two) is my cue to move on.
Right. To me, the level of unprofessionalism is precisely what makes OTC 1000x better than an escort. Strippers are 10x hotter than comparably priced escorts, and most will add in dinner, drinking, and even overnights for free -- that are not professionals, so they do not charge by the minute. If I think about the hottest stripper I've done an overnight with, the price for a comparably-hot escort would be 10x as much -- and that is not an exaggeration.
Of course, there's two sides to the unprofessional coin -- in order to get our hot stripper who doesn't bother charging extra for hours of her time, we have to deal with flakiness, lack of return texts, etc. Worth it!