Official TUSCL Pets Thread

avatar for shailynn
shailynn
They never tell you what you need to know.
Any of you fuckers have any pets?

I got my wife a declawed, neutered Maine Coon male cat about 6 years ago, from what Jackie has told me about Juice, this cat snores worse than him.

I also have a saltwater fishtank, about 75% of the time there's a live fish or two in there, my record was 2 years and 3 months on one single fish surviving, my shortest record is about 48 minutes from putting in tank to death.

60 comments

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avatar for mmdv26
mmdv26
7 years ago
4.5yo Goldendoodle girl and 13mo old Golden Retriever boy. Fabulous dogs!
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
7 years ago
Shadow was my cat for 18 years. Before him Morris, another cat, made it to 20. At the present time I am raising guppies in a 20 gallon aquarium. Over crowding is my biggest problem. They are worse than rabbits. :)
avatar for chessmaster
chessmaster
7 years ago
I have a dog that's it. I had a parakeet when i was a kid that died the day I got it.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
I remember dozens of pets as a kid. I have no desire to take care of one now. However I do have lizards roaming my yard and I don't kill them. 2 different species. I've even spotted a rabbit at times in my backyard and I don't kill it either. I figure I can hunt it in a shtf scenario unless one of my neighbors gets to it first.

I do take exception to the lizards coming inside my house. I don't want them inside. One snuck inside twice. I'm hoping I don't find a dried up lizard corpse one day.
avatar for DrunkPraetorian
DrunkPraetorian
7 years ago
I have a fern plant and a sock puppet.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
I once thought about building a bat house in my back yard but never did. I did see a bat flying around above my yard the other night so maybe it lives in the trees in my backyard. They make high pitched chirping noises some times.

My back yard trees have like a zoo of animals living in them. I spotted some Doves back there. They would make a nice meal in a shtf scenario. Trying to think of what animals I could hunt and eat in a crisis. Birds would be hard to catch.

Where I used to live we had Rocky the flying squirrel. He would sneak inside the house but while outside, he would steal big red tomatoes and run up the trees with them occasionally dropping them on the unsuspecting neighbor. When he ran out of tomatoes to steal from the neighbors garden and went to ours, a hit order was issued and my older brother and I smoked him out and neutralized him.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
There was a bat that slept on our carport when I lived in NC. It was like a cave always in shadow but it slept on the brick wall only 4 feet off the ground. There were dozens of bats eating bugs every night across the whole neighborhood. I used to bicycle as late as dusk or later and they would swoop near me scooping up insects. They came within a few inches of my head but they never hit me. They were just getting insects I was disturbing with my wind. I used to see them flying near street lights since the bugs would fly near the lights. There were hundreds of bats across the whole neighborhood.

We also had a stray cat we ended up adopting. It liked to hunt even though my relatives gave it food. We would see it catching mice or rats in the grass near the road on occasion. Of course it liked to play with its food often bringing back a small mouse to show us what it found.
avatar for rh48hr
rh48hr
7 years ago
I have a cat. My kids love cats. He's easy maintenance. And pretty chill.
avatar for ButterMan
ButterMan
7 years ago
I have a 14 year old female cat and a 4 year old tortie cat.
avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
7 years ago
I used to have a pet snake
avatar for UGK.22
UGK.22
7 years ago
Two dogs, one eyed cat and two wild rabbit's
avatar for wildbourbon
wildbourbon
7 years ago
Last year I went to shut off my underground sprinklers for the year and found a skunk at the bottom of the hole, from which it could not climb out on it's own. I wasn't going to bring it up myself and shooting it would have probably led to me putting a hole in my main irrigation pipe. I called and it was going to be a minimum of $60 to have animal control come get it.

I left it while trying to figure out a solution. The next day I realized I could drop my folded newspaper in the hole and create a ramp (the pipe is 6 inches in diameter and about 30 inches deep). Sure enough, the next day the skunk was gone. Didn't have to kill it and didn't have to get sprayed...that was my pet.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
Do alligators in the lake in back of my house count, one of them is at least 8 feet long and half a dozen 4-6 footers.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
Yikes, twentyfive, and to think you invited me to a BBQ at your place. You never said what was on the menu. US !!
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
I've got a cat. We've always had cats as I was growing up. There's nothing like pussy next to you. :)
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
^^^You mean you've never eaten gator tail tidbits, tastes just like chicken.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
I bet we taste just like chicken to them. (:
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
You are probably right ;)
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
7 years ago
Little 4got is the most brilliant kind of dog there is: a dachshund!

I also have 3 frog buddies and two lizard (gecko) buds!

My animal buds inspired me to invent the dachshund-frog-lizard system! :)
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
7 years ago
I have a cat Exxstasy. I believe she was a stripper in a past life because she is beautiful and graceful, cares only about herself, and sits on my lap without being asked,
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
^^^ my pet alligators think frogs are delicious and prefer dachshunds to poodles ; )
avatar for 4got2wipe
4got2wipe
7 years ago
I think little 4got could take down an alligator. He's scrappy! ;)
avatar for Doces300
Doces300
7 years ago
I have two rescue dogs and a trouser snake. Strippers seem to love the dogs.
avatar for BrotherFogHorn
BrotherFogHorn
7 years ago
I have a pet octopus
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
7 years ago
3 dogs.

1 cat.

And a back yard full of deer.
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
7 years ago
Hey Jack, yeah, but does your cat ask for money or a tip after sitting on your lap?
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
No, warhawks, she demands some of Jack's world-famous lasagna.
avatar for flagooner
flagooner
7 years ago
2 Havanese dogs. About 12 and 10 years old.

^^ "You mean you've never eaten gator tail tidbits, tastes just like chicken."

Why not just eat chicken then? Probably quite a bit cheaper.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
7 years ago
^^^So true and I really don't care for gator.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
7 years ago
What did one lesbian frog say to the other?
They're right. We do taste like chicken. :)
avatar for TheeOSU
TheeOSU
7 years ago
I'm actively searching for a Penthouse pet. :D
avatar for Trish_Club_Lust
Trish_Club_Lust
7 years ago
I have lots of friends with pet monkeys that I spank
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
7 years ago
Let's see, I have a sizable boat that is high maintenance and swallows large amounts of cash - nope, no need for a living, breathing pet for that......

And at home, I have a table saw, bandsaw, miter saw, jointer, planer, and assorted other hand tools. All have very sharp edges and are fully capable of sucking me in and doing a great amount of damage. That's why I've never needed to date strippers either. ;-)
avatar for Tiredtraveler
Tiredtraveler
7 years ago
Had a dog when I was a kid. Does that count? I travel to much to keep a pet.
avatar for NinaBambina
NinaBambina
7 years ago
My cat (greyish brownish tabby) sadly passed away a few months ago. He was my boy. I'm getting a new one soon, another boy. This time I will get an orange tabby. I will never get a cat declawed.

I also want to get a pet snake. Nothing dangerous or venomous. This one will be a female.
avatar for dallas702
dallas702
7 years ago
Dog, small (30lbs) but doesn't know it, demanding, self centered, attention seeking, and always wanting to "mark" everything as hers. Struts through the middle of any space like she owns it and always insists on having all of my attention. Oh' wait - - that was the wife. The dog is nice.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
7 years ago
I had a snake when I was in grade school. It was really a riot when it got loose and ended up in my sisters chest of drawers. :)
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
7 years ago
Two cats. I can't imagine declawing them, i.e. cutting their fingertips off.
avatar for NinaBambina
NinaBambina
7 years ago
Dallas, your wife is 30 pounds? Get her to a hospital.
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
7 years ago
Two dogs, one 50lb female bulldog/catahoula and an 80lb male husky/staffordshire, and three ferrets. It's hilarious to watch a two-pound weasel stalk and harass an 80lb pit mix.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
7 years ago
Went from 4 pets, 2 dogs, 2 cats down to 2 pets, one of each, over the last month. Wasn't a good time.
avatar for Book Guy
Book Guy
7 years ago
Dogs now and or in the past. They are best.
Also, many others. A squirrel once. A raccoon sort of, back when. Had a cat once in a while too, twice, but I'm more a dog person. Parakeet, also another type of budgie when I was really small. There's an almost-tame armadillo in the neighborhood where I live, it snoops around at dusk and will approach for carrots sometimes, but I haven't managed to get it to take food directly from my hand yet. Plenty of lizards, anoles brown and green, and geckos, and those chameleon things. Opossums in the parking lot across the street. Gators at the park, with Northerner idiots volunteering their doggies or kiddies for their dinner daily. And the house was infested with termites, I guess that counts as animals I was 'keeping' too.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
7 years ago
@Clubber, sorry to hear that. Been there often enough myself. It's just something we have to deal with.
avatar for LecherousMonk
LecherousMonk
7 years ago
Got a couple dogs.
avatar for Stognasty
Stognasty
7 years ago
Do the maggots in my coconut count?
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
7 years ago
gmd,

True, but my wife doesn't deal with it very well, and of course, that affects me also.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
I remember my family once had a pet duck. Unfortunately one day it escaped.

When I lived in Lousiana, I almost stepped on an alligator in the back yard one day. It was big. We had tarantulas that got swept off the roof pretty routinely, a few dogs, and lots of snakes that got chopped up on an almost daily basis. I'm glad we moved away from there. The dogs probably saved me from snake bites on a few occasions.

I once thought about getting a pet snake before I thought, I don't want to handle mice, rats, etc during the feeding process. Outdoor lizards do just fine. It seems strange like the lizards know I'm not going to hurt them. They don't run away that much. I remember a neighbor had what he called a guard dog. I couldn't get within 50 feet of it without it running away in fear. It had like a sixth sense and could tell when I was approaching. The way the dog acted, it must have thought I was possessed or something. I never saw a dog so afraid. It did live next door to me. I didn't do anything to it to make it fearful. Weird dog.
avatar for JuiceBox69
JuiceBox69
7 years ago
I used to have a dog that would try to get in bed with me and the wife during love making

Weird dog
avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen
7 years ago
Two rescue cats. They do l kinda act like strippers....they sleep all day and in general are lazy, love their drugs (catnip), they love being the center of attention, one moment act like they love me then the next ignore me, only obey my requests when I have something they want.
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
7 years ago
I have 2 shelter dogs and a cat. Lost one of my dogs a few months ago and just got a puppy so I have a 10 year old 85 pound dog and a 3 month old puppy. Never a dull moment.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
7 years ago
magic,

Beware those puppies! Last one I found wandering the streets turned out to be about a 130 lb. black lab!
avatar for warhawks
warhawks
7 years ago
Yep. The last "black lab" I got turned out to be a pit bull.

Great dog though. Pit bulls, when treated right, can be great dogs.
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
7 years ago
The puppy is "supposed" to be a lab/chow mix...the shelter estimated her to get to be 65-70 pounds.
avatar for Cashman1234
Cashman1234
7 years ago
I have a male neutered dog. On the small side - but a great dog.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
My cat will be happy to meet all your buddy pets. She's a snoopy old lady.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
I had a large panther run out in front of my car a few miles from my house. I even braced for impact and must have just barely missed it. I didn't realize until later I would have made news across the state becoming the first person to kill a panther with their car in South Carolina. It looked dark or black but it was night time and it jumped out in front of my car. Fortunately it ran across the road lightning fast. It would have wrecked my car maybe even damaging the windshield. It was as wide as my car with its tail included.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
Sometimes I look in my back yard to make sure there are no legendary cats in my back yard. I'd probably call 911 and then try to take pics if I spotted it in daylight. I never realized they were legendary and not proven to exist here.
avatar for sharkhunter
sharkhunter
7 years ago
Could have been a large cougar too. At the time I thought it was a black panther. I heard there are some in Florida. At the rate it moved, it could get there in a couple days easy. No one hit one because they are fast and don't stand in the road like a cow.

I saw a deer one day in my front yard. It almost hit my car. It was scared to death and running. It must have ran across a busy 5 lane highway to reach my house. I have no idea what it was running from. :). A really big predator cat?
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
Big cats are awesome. My parents were up in Michigan's Upper Peninsula visiting my sister who lives up there. Dad looked out the window one night and remarked about the large cat outside. My sister froze and told him to stay inside, it was a bobcat.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
7 years ago
Big cats are awesome. My parents were up in Michigan's Upper Peninsula visiting my sister who lives up there. Dad looked out the window one night and remarked about the large cat outside. My sister froze and told him to stay inside, it was a bobcat.
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