Ever been accused of being a racist based on what type of girl you prefer?
BurlingtonHoFactory
New Jersey, near the Shore
When I was a very young man, I loved Eastern European women. I liked the look, the accent, the attitude. I eventually grew out of that. Then for a while I kind of fetishized British women, but that didn't last either. Then I got into Latin girls, big time. Cuban, Mexican, Brazilian, Argentinean, etc. I practically blew a load in my pants every time Jennifer Lopez or Salma Hayek appeared on screen, and I got led around by the dick by every hot Puerto Rican chick I met. But then I grew out of that, too. Then I got into Middle Eastern girls: Arabic, Israeli, Turkish, Persian, Armenian, etc. It's a bit harder to indulge in that particular habit because they're kinda rare, and so I quickly grew out of that, as well. Finally, around 7 or 8 years ago, I started getting into white American girls, and this current preference has lasted the longest. I don't care what part of the country they're from, what their accent sounds like, or what their specific ethnic background is, I just prefer white American women.
I'm not a racist now, and I wasnt a racist back in the day when I preferred Latinas, etc. But the thing is, I get a somewhat different reaction from women when I admit my current preference. I guess the title of this post is a little misleading, because no one has ever actually called me a racist to my face. But once in a while, I get funny looks from girls when I admit to what I'm looking for. Oddly, it's usually a white American girl who I'm admitting this to in the first place. You would think they would just be happy to have me as a potential customer. Does anyone else have a racial/ethnic preference, and have you ever encountered negativity in a club (or elsewhere) as a result of it?
I'm not a racist now, and I wasnt a racist back in the day when I preferred Latinas, etc. But the thing is, I get a somewhat different reaction from women when I admit my current preference. I guess the title of this post is a little misleading, because no one has ever actually called me a racist to my face. But once in a while, I get funny looks from girls when I admit to what I'm looking for. Oddly, it's usually a white American girl who I'm admitting this to in the first place. You would think they would just be happy to have me as a potential customer. Does anyone else have a racial/ethnic preference, and have you ever encountered negativity in a club (or elsewhere) as a result of it?
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Does that make me a racism?
I'm an equal opportunity tits and ass guy.
I like women of all races and nationalities, though I developed an affinity for latinas when I visited Club Hong Kong in Tijuana a couple months ago. And, for some reason, I prefer Japanese women when I'm surfing porn at home (they're so beautiful and alluring and, oddly enough, I love the way many of them act -- submissive).
Anyway, I have felt your concern of being viewed as racially biased. I don't club often, but was at a place a year ago where there was a mix of white and black women. It just so happened a couple of the white women were more attractive than the rest and I was determined to wait for one of them for a dance. In the process I turned down three black women who approached me. They were nice and didn't make a fuss, but I sat there thinking "Gee, I hope she doesn't think I'm turning her down because she's black" because I have gotten services (dances, couple blow-jobs, a hand-job) from black women back in the day.
"But I wonder why you need to tell anybody what your preference is, if nobody asks."
Sure, it isn't something I would go around telling anyone who'll listen. But it seems that lots of girls will actually ask me specifically what my type is. I don't know if they're trying to break the ice, trying to get a feel for whether I'm worth their time, or just trying to make conversation. But what's weird is how sometimes they'll ask me, I'll answer truthfully, and then they'll give me a funny look. You would think instead they would be like "Oh, cool, I'm a white American girl. So let's go have some fun with my vagina!" But surprisingly that's not always the reaction I get.
If a dancer happens to mention race when I turn her down, it's usually from either an ugly or obnoxious dancer. Years ago I had very funny encounter with a very mediocre dancer light skinned black dancer, who kept insisting I had to get a dance with her. I told her three times I was waiting on another dancer, but she kept insisting. I finally saw the dancer I was waiting on, a hot tight bodies and dark skinned black dancer come out of the dressing room.
She usually won't stop by if another dancer is with me, but I mouth for her to stop by. So I said and here she comes now. She immediately sarcastically replies, "let me guess some skinny small-titted blonde." By this time the dancer I was waiting on, named Bryce was right behind her and Bryce says ready for our dance. The dumb founded shocked look on the other dancers face was priceless.
A similar thing happened with a Latin dancer at Mons Venus about twenty years ago who accused me of not liking Hispanic dancers, when the dancer who I was waiting on this very hot looking Cuban dancer stops by and says, "Still on for our time together?" I nod and she says, "let me freshen up and I'll be right." Her response was not as rude but she mumbled under her breath, "white guys also always go for her."
What I want to say is " only the good looking ones". But, I never do. I play along, then tell her " not now". I usually get a dirty look before she walks away.
An answer that might be better-received could be something like "I don't really have a set type. It varies over time. Right now, you look like you could be my type, though!"
Me? I looooove Latinas, and they'll always be my favorite. But it's mostly about who I find the hottest on a given night, not about race
Anyway, it's not just white girls that aren't impressed if for some reason they think you're mostly into their race rather than how her neck looks when her hair is pulled back or how it feels when she sits next to you.
To answer the OP question, yes, I have been called racist in the club but never anywhere else. I've also been called sexist at work for not hiring women who can't perform the job duties. I've certainly not hired more men then women but never based on sex or race. I need people who can do the f^^^^^^^ job.
"Maybe she looked at you funny because she asked you what type, which could be thick, thin, princess, bad girl, etc, and you answered with a race. ;)"
I think you're right, honesty isn't always the best policy, especially in the emotionally charged environment of a strip club. Plus I think the majority of dancers are millennials now, and they've been conditioned to be very sensitive about race, so you have to tread lightly even if you clearly don't mean any offense.
Whether it is a protest of people saying Jew stay home or a dancer or some person saying someone is racist , they are both name calling and acting the same in my opinion.
For the most part, I do not ever get into these discussions. As documented in my article, this falls under "don't be a little bitch". If I've turned down a stripper, 0% chance I'm answering any of her questions, much less one about my preferences.
this seems to be true in most cases. the majority of people date/marry someone within their own race.
but me? i prefer women outside of my race. i'm black, and i'm open to ANY race, but like everyone else, i have preferences. i mostly like latinas and white women. asians and black women don't appeal to me nearly as often as latinas and white women do.
1 of the Indian girls
5 of the black girls
8 of the Asian girls
13 of the latin girls
13 of the white girls
Just a matter of who I'm more likely to find attractive. Which doesn't mean I don't occasionally run into a super hot Indian girl, and fuck yeah I'll get dances from her, especially if her family is skilled at packing and shifting
HOT.
that IS all that matters.
.
So after the girl was sitting with me. We talked. I said, "Did they try to paw you?" ( Touching was not allowed.) But no, she said, "They were racists." And she explained that she knew this because she could feel it.
Apparently they were not tipping, just sitting there, and this is what the staff talked with them about.
I have found, and have read things to support this, that blacks are quicker to define problems as being caused by racism. I have found that black girls are smart and interesting, but it is easier to get wires crossed with them than it is with others.
SJG
I think it's cause I'm black. Told you black people can't be racist lmao :-P
I, too, agree that mixed race women are often really gorgeous. In particular, Eurasian features are a fave of mine
i like 'em ALL.
Maybe just don't use the term 'white'. Dancers have their radar up to detect any guy who might be a problem. Using the term specifically in that context isn't racist, but it may be hitting some tripwires.
Also, white supremacy is all over the news, TV, and radio right now. This may be a good time to practice subtlety.
Agree with everything you said. But the thing is, even when I avoid race and just say something like "I prefer thick, curvy girls," sometimes, not always, but sometimes, they actually think I'm making a comment about their weight. As if I just said "I prefer fat chicks, like you." Seriously, this has happened. I can't win. The next time a dancer asks me what my type is, I'm just going to say "you are."
Thanks for all the advice, guys
Not all, but many dancers have self-esteem issues and are very self-conscious about their appearance. Ironically, I don't think that there's as much body confidence amongst strippers as most people think.
So, yeah, any time you make a specific comment about appearance, you're wandering into a minefield that has more mines than field.
Or maybe it's an even better time to grow a sack. That way you can stop worrying about how you are perceived by strippers.
Well if they think you're a racist then you're probably not going to get the best hands-on treatment during a LD. It's the same reason why I apply a little cologne before I head to the club. I don't really care that much what they think of me.
OOOoooOOOooohhhh... guy I don't know on the Internet is being mean to me. Whatever will I do?
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My sack is fully grown. Thanks for checking in. The reality is that white supremacy is top-of-mind right now (whether or not you think it should be) and mentioning race can make people wary, depending on the context or lack thereof.
I don't worry about what strippers think of me, but I do try to be proactive in how they perceive me, i.e. not creepy, a jerk, dangerous, cheap, or even not a (potential) bigot.
Enjoy your day.
"Well if they think you're a racist then you're probably not going to get the best hands-on treatment during a LD."
I think you are both projecting your own delicate sensitivities by assuming that your dancers share them. Frankly, I don't think most of the white dancers give a shit and the darker ones won't either if you are dancing with them. No "subtlety" - aka verbal tapdancing - needed.
I have no idea whether a dancer might share my opinion on race, or disagree, or not give a shit. That said, it seems smarter to not test those waters and sour a fun night. The OP stated that his phrasing for his 'type' got him some awkward reactions from dancers, possibly because he might be perceived as bigoted. The feedback from myself (and others) has been "change your phrasing a bit and see if that helps."
If there's any projecting going on, it might be you projecting your own worldview into a thread where a guy just wants less awkward when he's shooting the shit with a dancer.
I don't have to sit there and choose my words. If I am asked a direct question about my preferences, I give a direct answer. This is my entertainment, pure and simple. I am always nice about it, but I don't mince words.
Of course, I send girls away quickly when I don't like them, so I'm not usually sitting with one who will likely take offense to my preferences anyway. Another thing you might consider.
Oh yeah, and the black girl I mentioned above re: OTC knows that I don't normally find black girls attractive, but that she is one of the rare exceptions. This didn't stop her from taking my money after she took what I put inside two of her three orifices.
I should also mention that plenty of white strippers are racist in their own rights. Two girls I've taken OTC in recent months made it a point of pride to let me know that they have never had black dicks inside them. I had never asked in the first place, but I guess they thought that this was a selling point with their white customers. I found these comments to be a little crass, but it didn't stop me from doing xyz with either of them.
Just a few random thoughts fwiw.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_V-5p3fM…
Fast forward to 1:30 in the clip.
I'm black.
I will say that I feel bad sometimes for black girls in white/mixed clubs - I admit, if I'm in the mood for black women in particular I'll just go to a black club - but it is what it is. It also could just be that girl in particular. There's only one black girl at my now-local spot that I would even consider getting a dance from...but she might be my favorite dancer there. Girls have got to learn they can't take things personally...and then try to project...at the club.
SS.
Okay, back to the story. My buddy is one of those guys who often gets enfatuated with teh waitress. In this club, the waitress was a HHHHOOOTTT Asian girl, bad girl in a fun way. And she dug him back, she talked the manager into letting my buddy take her in the back for a VIP, and agreed to go OTC with him as long as it was a double-date with me and her BFF at the club. I have to tell you, I think PLs who like the waitress are dingbats of the highest order, but my buddy was about to score the unicorn. THEN for some reason the knucklehead starts talking to her about politics, I told him to stop but he kept pressing his luck, then he hit on the topic of police (some police brutality story or other was in the news at the time) and it turns out she's super super anti-police and actively protests. You know what happens next: they have words. He is disgusted with her and wants no part of OTC.
In short: don't talk about politics. 22 year olds who have never been to college, do not have the same political views as successful educated middle-aged men. That's just what it is.