tuscl

Epic Fail: Taking a Civie Girl to a Strip Club

shailynn
They never tell you what you need to know.
Sunday, September 18, 2016 5:41 PM
Sometimes things seem like such a good idea, and then you get there... I have been seeing a divorced MILF for several months. We live several hours apart and meet one weekend night once a month and have wall to wall sex in a hotel somewhere between her home and mine. We have really crossed a lot of sexual boundaries and crossed off several sexual fantasies on our "sex bucket list." There's really nothing too taboo and on top of that we really get along well. I had to go away to a large city I don't get to visit often and invited her. I brought up the idea to her and she had already booked her flight before I even booked mine. We met up Friday night, and since we go so hard sexually and this time had 2 nights together I suggested we go out on Friday night and party. We needed it since we both had a really stressful week at work. We went out for a nice dinner, and had a bottle of wine and a drink, so when we left the restaurant we were pretty toasty. Instead of going back to the hotel or going to a nearby club that seemed like a nice spot, I had the bright idea that I would take her to a strip club and not tell her about it. After all, she had talked about going to strip clubs several times with male co-workers in her town because they were nice places with great lunch buffets. Walking in, she still didn't even know where I was taking while I was paying the cover and she didn't realize it until we walked in the main room. We sat down and I could see the look in her eye, my coolness cred went down 10 points immediately. It was a somewhat divey place (to her) but most PLs on here (including me) would be fine with it. It stunk of smoke (both of us are non-smokers) and there were about 15 dancers running around. 3 stunners (which none were near us) and a bunch of 5's near us. The one time I needed a waitress more than ever to keep feeding us shots, and we only got served once in the 30 minutes we were there. I wanted to go to the bar to grab more drinks but didn't want to leave her. She finally saw an attractive stripper and said 'man she's hot' but by then I could tell the magic was gone and I needed to get her out of there ASAP. If the waitress would have serviced us more it may have salvaged the trip but that's a big "if." I didn't have high expectations but I was thinking she would have some laughs and we would buy each other a few table dances and that's it. I think with my civvie friend, going in there she immediately started feeling a little intimidated by girls running around naked. She said if it were a more upscale club we probably would have had a better time. I doubt it! She asked me "why did you think I'd want to come to a strip club?" and I said "well I thought it would make both of us horny and you mentioned you've been to them before," and then she asked "you never talk about them, do you regularly go to them?" I responded "Uh no, I don't." Live and learn, she is one of the only two women I have been around (that has not been a stripper) that I would think I would have a chance at taking to a club and her enjoying or tolerating it. I was wrong! Luckily it was a running joke the rest of the weekend and she wasn't mad.

50 comments

  • rockstar666
    8 years ago
    Lesson learned. IMHO only dancers are good dates to a club. Civvies just aren't up for it most of the time.
  • MrDeuce
    8 years ago
    Later this fall I hope to spend *two* days and nights (about 40 hours straight) with my ATF. We had no trouble whatsoever occupying ourselves for a single overnight date lasting 16 hours: dinner, making out, round #1 of adult fun, sleep, round #2, and brunch filled the time nicely. However, I'm looking for activities to fill *another* 24 hours, especially that afternoon between our first brunch and our second dinner. Since she's a stripper currently taking a few weeks off, I think she'll be down with hitting the day shifts at a couple of strip clubs. Furthermore, she's bisexual, so I suspect she'll want to do some lappers -- with or without me :)
  • lopaw
    8 years ago
    Oy! If there is one thing that you NEVER do, its bringing an uninitiated straight civvie chick to a stripclub without telling her first! I'm soooooooo disappointed in you, shailynn. *smh*
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Yep, a bottle of wine and 2 shots of bourbon and Shailynn will start making bad decisions! lol
  • seaboardrr
    8 years ago
    Well, all you can do now is just shake it off and go back to your boring wall to wall sex meetings. If she likes going to upscale SC's with co-workers and now she knows you'll take her to one just give her time. If she really likes them then never bring it up and eventually she'll say something about finding one she likes and y'all can go have fun.
  • seaboardrr
    8 years ago
    Oh, I forgot. It's not that she doesn't like them since she said she goes. The problem I see is you didn't discuss it with her beforehand so she wasn't prepared. A woman going to a SC knows she's going to see hot naked chicks running around so she'll want to get out her best sexy slutty attire and do her hair and makeup just right so she feels just as sexy. Taking her there in just her normal hair, makeup and street attire made her feel bad about the way she looked and what she was wearing.
  • rh48hr
    8 years ago
    Have to agree, not telling her didn't help your situation.
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Seaboardrr you're exactly right. I told her before hand to bring something "slutty" to wear out. She did, but when we went to eat at a nice restaurant she dressed nice. She mentioned "should I go back and change?" And I said "no you're fine" yet another mistake on my part. This is something I probably won't revisit with her again. Next time I'll have her dress slutty and go to a normal club.
  • jester214
    8 years ago
    Yeah, might have been a different outcome if you had tossed it out beforehand. Though personally I would only take a civvie if they asked and even then I'm not sure I would do it.
  • seaboardrr
    8 years ago
    Yep, after y'all go out dressed nice and she asks if she should change go back so she can put on her sexy slutty clubbing clothes and do her hair and makeup and eventually she'll bring up going to a SC again. Just do plenty of homework so when she asks if there are any "upscale" SC's you already have a prepared answer.
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    ^^^ lol yep, we have had so many sexual trysts that this seemed like the next logical step. We agreed we weren't wild enough to do a swingers club and we had talked about strip clubs and she mentioned she had gone with guys at work for lunch before and loved it. To me that translated to "oh she'd be fine in a strip club," man was I wrong! I need to translate that better like "I love going out to eat with my boss, because I get some personal time with him and he picks up the tab," but that doesn't mean I'm calling him on a Saturday night asking if he'd like to go out to eat with me.
  • larryfisherman
    8 years ago
    There goes 15 year old Shailynn making up stories again! Did your mommy let you out of the house this weekend? Or did you have too many four lokos and chicken fangas and your retarded ass was grounded? Rock on Juice!
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Larry you do realize I have been a member here for 13 FUCKING YEARS don't you? If I was 15 that would mean I started posting when I was 2. Several members have physically met me on here, how many member have met you?
  • JamesSD
    8 years ago
    Yeah, I don't think I'd take a chick on a surprise Strip Club trip. Dream Civvy wants to go to a club with me sometime (I'll take her at night probably). Even though the idea has come up, I can't imagine just bringing her to one without making a plan first. Minimally, women like to plan their outfits and makeup.
  • shadowcat
    8 years ago
    I took a civie once. My wife at her request. She wanted to see what it was all about. This was back in the early 80's at a club near LAX. There were no lap dances. Purely stage shows. She was ready to leave after 15 minutes. I'd never seen her finish a drink so fast. She was the only female customer in the place. I did not have a good time.
  • Ch3ll
    8 years ago
    Well shai you did good by just taking her there and not asking. I think that would have got her more into questioning you. I've taken two civies to the SC. The first seemed cool about it at first, but wanted to be dressed up before she went. The visit was okay, but short. The second civie I took was tonight and she was all for it. She wanted me to get dances so she could watch. That threw me for a loop, so I just played it cool and kept my hands to myself. Also, luckily her choice of girls existed at a club I'm not known as a regular at so even better for me. After we left, I could see she genuinely had a good time when she told me she had a good time.
  • Papi_Chulo
    8 years ago
    Hindsight is 20/20 - I could see how you thought she'd be into-it her being a bit of sexual-freak & the fact she had been to them b/f could make one think she was alright w/ it & accustomed to them to some extent. There's been posts b/f about taking newbs to SCs & how that's backfired even though they were guys - I guess something as unconventional as a SC is something that one does not spring on someone w/o asking first - I guess yiu sorta rolled the dice & u were hoping she'd really be into it but it was a pretty-big gamble the way hou went about it - SCs are a niche taste for most people and even more-so for a straight female - in a case like this one needs to make sure they go to the most-upscale SC possible that almost looks like a glorified nightclub.
  • Papi_Chulo
    8 years ago
    Next time surprise her by taking her to a male-review
  • TravelingGolfer
    8 years ago
    Great thread. This gives me the idea to take my SB, a former stripper, to an SC for one of our "dates". I'll tell her in advance and I'm pretty sure she'll be down for it, but it might double the cost of our date, since she likes to drink. I think it will be worth the expense though, for the entertainment value. There's a pretty good chance my SB might be the hottest girl in the club, so I'll be curious to see the attention we get from the dancers and whethet or not any of the dancers want to play with us. Curious to try this now. Thanks for sharing Shailynn.
  • 4got2wipe
    8 years ago
    Just reflect on this shailynn: a non-brilliant decision led to a brilliant story! So it's all ace! :)
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Thanks 4got - hey I wouldn't be doing this board a good service if I only talked about my successes - I need to mention my failures as well.
  • rickdugan
    8 years ago
    That was equal parts stupid and unkind. She only sees you once a month and, in this instance, she made an extra effort to fly out and see you for a whole weekend. It never occurred to you that she is hoping to be the center of your attention during these brief visits? It sounds like she made the best of it after, but you're being naive if you think that it will all blow over that easy. She's not going to forget this and it will likely color how she thinks of you moving forward.
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Ricky I can see where you'd be quick to judge since you haven't had sex where money hasn't exchanged hands since your college days. Let me explain. This woman is a freak. Since I met her, I've tied her up, light torture, golden showers, public sex, outfits, toy play, squirting, video taped, etc etc etc. she wants to do a threesome, so I wasnt out of line taking her to a club as she has talked about them in the past. Where I fucked up was not telling her where we were going in advance and not taking her to a high end club. I chose this club because it was known for being couples friendly and because it was close to our hotel. Live and learn.
  • DoctorPhil.
    8 years ago
    my advice would be to hypmotize her with laser eyes. any woman will do anything after getting the laser eyes. even allow you to chase her around manically while the yakity saxity plays
  • stripfighter
    8 years ago
    ",,,She asked me "why did you think I'd want to come to a strip club?"..." Oh no that's the kiss of death. Never thought about surprising someone with a strip club visit, but thanks for the story and reinforce never to do it. Women are always competing with each other more so than for the attention of males and she'd want to prepare appropriately. The night was over before it begun, and the waitresses were avoiding you two because they wanted you to leave most likely. Good to hear she took it in stride the next day and good luck with her she seems awesome.
  • Mate27
    8 years ago
    Good story and good stuff to share. I did the same thing a couple times with different results however I did explain ahead of time where we were going. First girl loved it and got a rush from it ending the night with wild sex. Second girl hid out in the bathroom and wouldn't come out even after agreeing to go with me. She didn't respond to my texts or phone calls so I left her after an hour. Never heard from the 2nd girl again besides the text she left me two hours later asking "where are you?"
  • rickdugan
    8 years ago
    Shailynn, you'd be a lucky SOB if you fucked the girls that I did through my 20s and up to my mid 30s, right up until I met my hot ass wife and started pumping out beautiful children. There were plenty of freaky types included in that mix, but even they wouldn't have wanted to feel like they are competing or being compared - they wanted to be the center of the event. ;) You've got to broach something like including other girls carefully, even if it is just a strip club format. Now maybe the battle ax that you are fucking is needy enough that she'll keep coming back. But that doesn't mean that you didn't fuck up, just that she's desperate enough to keep fucking you anyway. :)
  • trickystick
    8 years ago
    Shailynn, based on everything you've said, if it had been *her* idea I think it would've gone much differently. If you'd paged through the names of nearby clubs on your phone at dinner, and let her "notice" that there was a strip club nearby, you could have had playful conversation around it and she might've even suggested it. And then you might have had the night of your life. Live and learn!
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    That's a good angle trickystick - thanks for the advice. Ricky I'm so sorry for suggesting I may be an inkling as cool and savvy as you. After all I don't wear suits to the club so I should know better that I don't come anywhere close to you nor do my experience par up.
  • san_jose_guy
    8 years ago
    So many of the reviews on yelp are written by couples and females. I have no idea why anyone would take any kind of a girl to a strip club. 1. Strip clubs are very expensive. You are paying for female attention, so it can be worth it, but only if you are alone. 2. A dance from another club will expect you to be generous with the local club's dancers. Expensive, and totally wasteful. 3. Civilians will find so much of it offensive. Why does anyone do it? Do they want their GF to become more stripper like for them? Other ways to achieve this. SJG Belly Dance Makeup Pics [view link] [view link] [view link]
  • Mate27
    8 years ago
    Good retort, Shailyn. U can tell "tricky stick" I stated so, since he has me on ignore. Such a fag stick when he has to edify himself "hot ass wife pumping out beautiful children." He's got that psychosis that can never be cured. Multiple psychosis that is...
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Thank Meat72, Yeah, greasing bouncers, bragging about driving drunk, Ricky is a true fucking winner.
  • Dougster
    8 years ago
    RickyBoy: "Shailynn, you'd be a lucky SOB if you fucked the girls that I did through my 20s and up to my mid 30" I don't know given how intimidated Rick gets around strippers and how he has to pay them to talk to him, I have a bit of a hard time he is (was) the stud he wants all to believe he was. Probably married the first girl who had sex with him (even though she had to be drunk at the time).
  • Dougster
    8 years ago
    I still remember the story RickyBoy posted to stripperweb about how he had to avoid his favorite club for months on end on nights when his #1 and #2 favorites were working, because his "real manly" self could not figure how to deal with such a situation other than to stay home. Yep, real player he must have been.
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Lol Doug that's a classic - Ricky on stripperweb? Was his original intention trying to tell women that any man that comes into the club with a three piece suit should get sex for free? Or was he asking how to seduce a bouncer?
  • Dougster
    8 years ago
    People will just have to read and decide for themselves. Are these the writings of a guy who was the stud he claims on he was on here in his 20s to mid 30s: [view link] or is it a guy who has no idea how to deal with them?
  • rentz2
    8 years ago
    It all depends on what type of girl you take to the club.
  • Mate27
    8 years ago
    Rickyboy and SJGuy have the same thing in common, attention seeking spamming posts filled with idealistic lies.
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    Meat, are you saying you don't believe that SJG is connected politically and that Ricky doesn't have beautiful kids!?!?!? Lmao!!!!!
  • jbdsm
    8 years ago
    Agree with everyone that the surprise visit is what did you in. Best to bring up the idea of what you want to do but let them be the one to suggest actually doing it. My wife loves visiting clubs but only if it is her idea.
  • shailynn
    8 years ago
    ^^^ lol I think your suggestion goes for everything in life involving a woman. As long as it's their idea it's an awesome idea. Shame on me for forgetting that Cardinal room but I'm a guy, I forget everything - it's in my dna!
  • Jascoi
    8 years ago
    the only way i would take a civie girl to a strip club would be if she suggested it herself. and i would insist on topless. and i would have to play dumb.
  • Dominic77
    8 years ago
    Yeah. A lot of good advice and feedback has already been given, especially jbdsm. Here are my suggestions. FIRST, she needs to be mentally prepared for it. You can't just spring it on her. And even, then tread lightly. Women have feelings, emotions, hormones, and sensitivities that men don't have. You just can't spring shit like that on them. Women *DO* like surprises, just not that kind. Chances are she will bring it up. But even if you are out-and-about, offer, at least offer, to take her home first to change & freshen up. SECOND, the trip needs to be about her, her enjoyment, and her comfort level. Think that she's the customer and your are just a semi-invisible customer. The dancers pay attention to her, and to her FIRST and you SECOND. And only if she's feeling it and okay with it. See a civvie girl can go from "edgy and slutty and feelin' it" aka 60 mph, to "not feeling it, awkward, bad, let's leave NOW" aka 0 mph in the span of minutes or seconds. Do you need to be constantly aware of how she's doing and how she's holding up. I'd had civvie dates to strip clubs before and they've all gone smoothly. The trick it to watch this. In my case, all of my dates "have gotten off on watching me get dances with other dancers." It's probably rare, bordering on some type of unicorn civvie species or something, but they do exist. But the minute she's no longer feeling it, you need to bag it and head home for the night. Also, do avoid catty female-hating dancers. They will kill your woman's confidence and feelings in no time flat. All that does it make the trip end prematurely. Seek out female-friendly dancers. Usually about half of the club's dancers fit that mold, IME. THIRD, women have a different time scale for strip clubs than men do. To civvie women, it's like dogs years or something. Figure a heterosexual women will only want to spend 40-60 minutes in the club, AND THAT IS IT. I once took a woman out to 90 minutes ITC, and that was a huge mistake. So when you get there, get some drinks for her, and DO NOT WASTE ANY TIME. Find some dancers. Find WOMAN FRIENDLY DANCERS. Seek them out in corners, or on stage or at the bar, wherever. Once you find one or two she clicks with, get one super quickly for yourself. Don't approach this like a normal guys' visit where you take you time to scout out or feel out a dancer for VIP. Nope. I figure a 40-60 minute trip is broken down into 2 parts. The first part where the two of you are getting drinks and scoping / talking to dancers. This might take 20 minutes. The second part of the trip, for me, is where you (and maybe her) start to get dances or VIP. Hopefully the dancer you jointly picked for your girl, she and your GF get along. If so. Leave them some money to entertain themselves (get something to eat, singles for stage tipping, or just drinks and more convo). Most of my dates get 1-2 lap dances, if that, and that's it. The rest of the time is either she is eating a meal with the dancer, or the two of them sit at stage and stage tip together. See, the dancer is like her temporary GF or BFF for the night. In fact, I pull the dancer aside and tell her discreetly and straight-up, if you keep her entertained and happy, I will make it up to you when it's time to go. A "woman-friendly dancer" understands this. If they're stage tipping, together, while I get dances, I give them a stack one $1s, and split it between the two of them. That keeps them occupied for the 20 minutes while I get dances and they watch. Though, keep a watch on your women. The minute she goes from fine to not-fine, start packing it up. You need to bail. You will hit this around the 40-60 minute mark. FOURTH, you can't just expect her to feel comfortable wearing whatever she is currently wearing. To visit a strip club or a gentleman's club, she is GOING TO WANT TO CHANGE HER CLOTHES. Also make sure she's wearing underwear and that her pussy is fresh. She definitely will want to change her shoes/heels. She likely will change her perfume and makeup into something more SLUTTY for the club. Let her. This is part of her confidence. You need that confidence and mental preparation for the trip to be a success. Do not underestimate this!
  • skibum609
    8 years ago
    My favorite time ever in a strip club was with my wife at the Inner Room Cabaret. The gay bartender loved her and made us killer drinks. The dancers liked her. She got dances. The dancers took her top off (if you know the inner room at all you know every single person in the club saw), she had orgasms with 2 dancers which she told me about during sex, but best of all when this large breasted Blonde stripper asked her if she wanted me to come a with her when she got a dance she looked at the stripper and said "why the fuck would I want him there"? Oh yeah, having my dancer pull out my junk and start stroking it while wife had her top off was also pretty fun.
  • lopaw
    8 years ago
    Awesome writeup, Dominic77! That ought to be a sticky note here for that topic (which seems to come up often).
  • Mate27
    8 years ago
    Sticky note...lol
  • magicrat
    8 years ago
    I have taken a few civies to clubs but we discussed it first and they were more than ready to go. A couple times were great, the others just meh. The 40-60 minute time limit is right on. I hadn't thought about it before, but they were all shorter visits than my trips alone. Good topic and comments!
  • tacklebox
    8 years ago
    A few weeks ago I was out of town with a friend who used to dance. I met her when she was bartending at a club and we became pretty good friends and have gone out and enjoyed ourselves in a variety of settings. We went on an out of town trip and while we were out drinking, she suggested going to a club. Seems like a slam dunk, no? This chill as fuck girl stiffened up like a board as soon as we went in. Had a drink at the bar while she ignored the dancer trying to talk to her. Gave her a fistful of dollars to tip the girl on stage (My friend is bi also) She basically walked up, dropped the money, and walked away. I suggested we leave and she was so relieved. It put an odd twist on the rest of our trip. I don't know if I will ever understand bitches.
  • JohnSmith69
    8 years ago
    I really want to take the DC to a strip club. But I'm afraid it wood turn out just like it did for Shailynn. Or worse.
  • Dominic77
    8 years ago
    Thanks for the props, lopaw! I mean that :) I think part of the takeway is to wait for the civvie to ask to go to a SC. Then be mindful how she's doing while you're there. And remember, you can always take a separate trip, later, by yourself to get your rocks off. So don't be selfish on the trip with the civvie. But don't just sit there like a lump either. If she senses you're not at least *enjoying yourself,* she wonder *WTF* why you're both here. (Fair question on her part.) For Tusclers, at least for the night, assuming your date is NOT OKAY with extras, just for the night, once, act and pretend that, "ooh, yes, clean dances are so sexual, sensual, and satisfying." Clubbing with a civvie not for everyone. One needs to understand and how to read women pretty well. The easiest female companion, by a huge margin, is a legit bisexual (or a lesbian). But more often than not you are taking a heterosexual female. Quite frankly, she'll get bored of naked women pretty fast. Hence you need to take control and keep the momentum rolling.
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