I'm comfortable in the silence. I focus more on pulling her close to me so I can get my hands all over her curves. Kissing her neck. If she is game she will usually rub my dick and kiss me back. No real need for conversation
Whether she spits or swallows. How deep she can go without gagging. Whether or not she can handle me pushing her head all the way down when I nut. If she has any "interesting" piercings I can play with. How much pain she likes. How she feels about OTC. Whether she has a girlfriend who likes to play.
You're paying for the experience so talk (or don't talk) as you wish. You don't need to feel intimidated because this isn't a civilian interaction where what you say will matter. You can't win them over with words. If you are at the club for conversation, just talk to them like your buddy. If you are at the club for private dances, keep the conversation transactional.
I talk to them like I'm on a date with them or any other casual setting. The thing I like about dancers is (1) they're non-judgemental and (2) pretty much what you say to them goes no farther than them. Both aspects are a welcome change from civilian women.
I agree with the others. Don't get too caught up in what you're doing with dancers or what you're not doing with dancers. Tip and reward behavior you like and what you find enjoyment with.
If you do want to practice convo (because for some reason you want to get better at it) go to a neighborhood club on a weekday afternoon when it's dead. Get some drinks and talk to the dancers. You'll get lots of practice that way and the weekday girls appreciate the business (tips and/or dances).
Meursault --> "You can't win them over with words." --> end quote Meursault
^LOL. I had a dance once say that to me. I think I was 19 or 20 at the time. She said, "Umm, sweetie that's great but you don't need to try to impress me. I kind of a sure thing!"
At home I get teased about my "stripper dates" or "going to see my topless therapists." I can laugh about it too.
usually the convo starts about why I'm in the club and what I looking to get out of tonight. that gives her something to work with and helps her tailor her approach to me. some dancers are better conversationalists than others. Some can lead the convo and we can go back and forth. Others like young blondes, just stare at you, touch your arm, and wait for you to lead aren't really good at convo, and are just good for dances or play time in the back.
It really gets derailed when the bad ones build up walls. "Ooh, you're drinking jack daniels. My Dad like to drink that." or "ooh, that's a nice watch (nice cologne) by Dad also wears one that that!" rather than building rapport or a connection.
I don't know how old you are, but if you are closer to the dancers' ages, then it is really easy to find common ground to build a conversation. It gets harder if you 2-3X the dancers' ages and if you don't have much in common. If that's the case, try talking about cities or travel to see if something clicks between the two of you.
i talk to her about what is the city like, what is there to do for fun, what dies she like to do outside teh club, her sexii body, tats piercings make it all about her make her feel special and maybe she will return the favor. worked for me soo far
I had a dancer that had an interesting scar at the base of her back. She didn't mind telling me all about it. I just hope when I bring up things like that the story isn't about some kind of domestic violence.
I start out by asking how long she has been working at the club, as a stripper, etc. I want to find out her experience. That gives me a clue as what to expect from her dances.
Start out by talking about the shit that's happening in the club right in front of you. How many girls are in. If it is slow or packed. Are the custies spending. Music selection. Than talk about her outfit and where she bought it. Notice her hair and nails. They put a lot of thought into this stuff. Stay away from the boring "where are you from?" shit. Just remember, beyond determining how much money you have, a dancer could really give a shit about you or your life at first. It is all white noise to them leading to revenue opportunity. Of course I only put this much effort in to OTC targets. Otherwise, its whatever.
I assume dancers usually don't like to talk abouf personal things unless they've known you for a while & feel comfortable talking w/ you - as others have stated talking about the club & dancing is something she would feel comfortable talking about.
Movies, music, TV, travel, dirty jokes -- I try to find something more original than "Where are you from?" and "How long have you worked here?" In real life I love discussing politics and religion; in the club I avoid them assiduously. I really don't give a fuck what a stripper thinks about Brexit or transubstantiation :)
There's no formula. Like Dominic said, just talk to them like you're on a date with them or in any other casual setting. And if you aren't very good at talking to women, strippers will give you a chance to practice in a setting that should be low pressure. I know that when I started online dating a while back, I was a much better conversationalist (both in person and in writing) as a result of my vast experience talking to gorgeous young women in strip clubs.
Don't think what you say doesn't go beyond them. Strippers tell me what other customers say to them all the time. Often times they're pretty explicit about it. As in, "see that dude over there, he said blah." I've also had strippers and or waitresses say things to me that clearly demonstrate that they've been talking to another stripper. Luckily, I've never had it be anything of concern, but I wouldn't tell a stripper anything you don't want everyone in the entire building to know you said. Obviously, its a whole different ballgame when compared to talking to a blind date a friend/co-worker set you up on though. Don't get me wrong, I'm still in the camp of talking to strippers like I would any other girl. But, I do consider anything I say will probably repeated. There's probably a lot of shit that gets totally ignored, or forgotten before she leaves, but not all of it.
I'm not sure about the judgmental part. On one hand, I doubt many care enough to be judgemental. On the other, I think they've made some considerable judgements about me before they walked over. It probably doesn't matter, since I don't really care what they think of me for the most part.
To add to what dolfan said, this carries over to text message as well. A couple times, my ATF has given me her phone to show me some of the more ridiculous convos she's had with other PLs. Yeah, another PL may have had access to your name / number and knows the weird shit you text strippers.
Anyways, if you're with a good dancer who wants to work you over rather than score a quick dance, she'll bring the conversation topics. A few easy topics, are music (what does she like to dance to vs. Listen), tv/movies, their background (just avoid white knight shit like "why are you stripping" etc...), sports (some will educate themselves on it), and in some cases, relationships.
Of course, you don't have to talk to them at all if you don't want. If you struggle to come up with with things to talk to them about, then don't talk to them and just get down to business.
Yeah, it goes to other PLs, sure. I've heard some stories too. I mean if you talk to a dancer about shit someone in your life is doing, it doesn't get back to that person. Like if a talk to a civilian woman about someone else, that civvie will either go tell that person directly, or someone else who will (gossip). That's what I meant. Not that is was a protected or privileged conversation, like a spouse, lawyer, clergy, shrink, etc.
I pretty much figure we're sharing dirty gossip on each other. I know I heard my fair share from dancers, too. Especially in my younger days (RE: older perverts).
RE: judgemental
No, I think they keep an open mind. At least to my face. That's all I'm paying her for.
Dancers also say some crazy shit. That's part of why I like talking with dancers so much. Some of the crazier things share with my SO. That's part of why she has no problems with me going to the clubs. She's likes their stories as much I as do.
My 21-yr-old Asian 9+ SB econ major from Seeking Arrangements came over this morning and we did in fact discuss Brexit. She made the point that this sell-off will not be nearly as bad as Lehman and that the fall of the pound sterling will make her upcoming trip to London cheaper. She also described why she liked calculus more than statistics in high school. Yes, really.
Went clubbing at my favorite nude club in the early afternoon. Met a dancer with 3 kids and -- following Shailynn's excellent advice -- we talked about her kids. Shailynn has a keen understanding of human nature and single-mom dancers *love* to talk about their kids.
Ran into a petite dancer I've been trying to do take-out with, and it looks like I will succeed this time. My system: I take a shower and ask politely and honestly about going OTC.
Like most of the others, I just let it flow, almost as if I were scoring with a girl I just met at a bar. ALMOST ... because with a girl I just met at a bar, the conversation would not likely be turning to sex or strip clubs or crazy stories of partying and drugs.
One of the advantages of being a long-time PL is that I:
1. Have an idea of what kinds of things either always interest strippers, or get them giggling, or otherwise engaged and participating in the conversation
2. Have funny stories about all the strip clubs that I've gone to with any regularity -- and stories about the club they're in always meet item #1 above
3. Always do shots with the girls, and that gives us both a sense of comraderie, and generates some funny conversation itself (about last time she did that kind of shot, or what her favorite shot is, or why she doesn't drink tequila anymore, or how my buddy got the waitress drunk on the very type of shot we're drinking now, or ...)
In short, be mindful enough to take note of what kinds of conversations strippers love, have some backup stories, build up some stories about the club you're in, and for heaven's sake, buy the bitch some vokka. Once you loosen her up a bit and she's not in "oh no, another guy who has nothing to say" mode, the majority of strippers are good conversationalists and have great stories to tell, you just have to get her having enough fun with you to get going
1st it depends on what do you want/looking for and whether it's a new dancer or a fave.
Personally, if she's hot and I'm attracted/thinking about getting dances, it automatically makes me interested in her and her life. If not I'll get general info about her and/or the club to be polite, but after approx 2 topics let her know I don't want to waste anymore of her time.
As far as topics, I flow with whatever she offers. I can pretty find a way to get interested in any topic as long as she has a sense of humor and able to have fun with it.
I usually come in acting like a undercover cop. I start off asking them how much for ejaculate services. Then I ask her to answer by speaking into my shirt pocket
"Whether she spits or swallows. How deep she can go without gagging. Whether or not she can handle me pushing her head all the way down when I nut. If she has any "interesting" piercings I can play with. How much pain she likes. How she feels about OTC. Whether she has a girlfriend who likes to play."
No disrespect, but stuff like this is why I often wonder if georgmicrodong is fucking with us! Especially the BDSM stuff.
I mean really, if a new guy started posting and he bragged about having a small dick and talking about BDSM what would you think?
I know that most people would think it was juicebox69 (or maybe the DoctorPhil guy) if there were spelling errors. But what if his spelling was acceptable? I'd still be suspicious.
To be honest, I'd respect georgmicrodong more if he was fucking with us. That would be kind of ace! ;)
To answer the original question, I just make small talk. I try to avoid anything too heavy. I did talk with one stripper about aliens and (no disrespect to sharkhunter who apparently communicates with aliens) it was clear that she had no clue of the distance scale in space. She couldn't believe that it took almost 10 years to get a spacecraft to Pluto and clearly though the stars could be reached in no time.
She brought it up. The conversation was non-brilliant and I just nodded.
I do refrain from using "brilliant!" or "ace!" I save those for TUSCL! ;)
Mine typically start with how's their night going since I usually go at night. Sometimes that'll open up to unforeseen topics, and sometimes it dries out or gets the one word "good."
If the girl is a chatty one or good hustler she'll usually keep the convo going and bringing up subjects to talk about. It just varies. Last two strippers I encountered we talked about music and exercising.
Girls like to know about a guy. They like to be able to judge him.
But in P4P venues they know that they should not ask. So if you want to make a good impression on a girl, anticipate what she would want to ask, and then tell her yourself without her having to ask. You figure ways to let her know what she wants to know.
1. Employment
2. Marital Status
3. What area you live in.
4. Why you are in town and how often you will be there.
5. Things you are working on or that are important to you.
6. Why you are at the strip club, and why that particular club.
You find ways just to talk to her that are completely ordinary, but still give her all the answers.
Also, having done that you gently start asking her questions. Be gentle, but it lets her see that you are screening her.
It all comes down to talking to her just like you would any other girl, not as a sex worker.
I told a dancer I was thinking about telling her a joke. That I had a case of Brexit but the doctor said I wasn't contagious. Then I asked her if she knew what Brexit was. She had no idea. I noticed she didn't stay on my lap for too long, haha. I guess she might have been worried about catching a case of Brexit even though she didn't know what that was. I can imagine the conversation among strippers in the back. Have you ever heard of someone having Brexit? No? What's that? Never heard of it. Then one pipes up, is that like a bad cold?
Be careful. If you get one talking, they might talk and talk and talk.
It can be like a negotiation. Find a topic or topics that you are both interested in talking about. Most people stay away from certain topics like religion, politics, etc, if they want to avoid potential disagreements over something they wished they never mentioned. What do you talk to your friends about?
Dougster writes, "The less you talk with them the better."
This is because in his Master-Slave society of the future, strippers won't really count for much. But know what, most of us will count for even less than they do in Dougster's vision of the future.
38 comments
I agree with the others. Don't get too caught up in what you're doing with dancers or what you're not doing with dancers. Tip and reward behavior you like and what you find enjoyment with.
If you do want to practice convo (because for some reason you want to get better at it) go to a neighborhood club on a weekday afternoon when it's dead. Get some drinks and talk to the dancers. You'll get lots of practice that way and the weekday girls appreciate the business (tips and/or dances).
Meursault --> "You can't win them over with words." --> end quote Meursault
^LOL. I had a dance once say that to me. I think I was 19 or 20 at the time. She said, "Umm, sweetie that's great but you don't need to try to impress me. I kind of a sure thing!"
usually the convo starts about why I'm in the club and what I looking to get out of tonight. that gives her something to work with and helps her tailor her approach to me. some dancers are better conversationalists than others. Some can lead the convo and we can go back and forth. Others like young blondes, just stare at you, touch your arm, and wait for you to lead aren't really good at convo, and are just good for dances or play time in the back.
It really gets derailed when the bad ones build up walls. "Ooh, you're drinking jack daniels. My Dad like to drink that." or "ooh, that's a nice watch (nice cologne) by Dad also wears one that that!" rather than building rapport or a connection.
I don't know how old you are, but if you are closer to the dancers' ages, then it is really easy to find common ground to build a conversation. It gets harder if you 2-3X the dancers' ages and if you don't have much in common. If that's the case, try talking about cities or travel to see if something clicks between the two of you.
I'm not sure about the judgmental part. On one hand, I doubt many care enough to be judgemental. On the other, I think they've made some considerable judgements about me before they walked over. It probably doesn't matter, since I don't really care what they think of me for the most part.
Anyways, if you're with a good dancer who wants to work you over rather than score a quick dance, she'll bring the conversation topics. A few easy topics, are music (what does she like to dance to vs. Listen), tv/movies, their background (just avoid white knight shit like "why are you stripping" etc...), sports (some will educate themselves on it), and in some cases, relationships.
Of course, you don't have to talk to them at all if you don't want. If you struggle to come up with with things to talk to them about, then don't talk to them and just get down to business.
RE: it going no further than the dancer
Yeah, it goes to other PLs, sure. I've heard some stories too. I mean if you talk to a dancer about shit someone in your life is doing, it doesn't get back to that person. Like if a talk to a civilian woman about someone else, that civvie will either go tell that person directly, or someone else who will (gossip). That's what I meant. Not that is was a protected or privileged conversation, like a spouse, lawyer, clergy, shrink, etc.
I pretty much figure we're sharing dirty gossip on each other. I know I heard my fair share from dancers, too. Especially in my younger days (RE: older perverts).
RE: judgemental
No, I think they keep an open mind. At least to my face. That's all I'm paying her for.
Went clubbing at my favorite nude club in the early afternoon. Met a dancer with 3 kids and -- following Shailynn's excellent advice -- we talked about her kids. Shailynn has a keen understanding of human nature and single-mom dancers *love* to talk about their kids.
Ran into a petite dancer I've been trying to do take-out with, and it looks like I will succeed this time. My system: I take a shower and ask politely and honestly about going OTC.
One of the advantages of being a long-time PL is that I:
1. Have an idea of what kinds of things either always interest strippers, or get them giggling, or otherwise engaged and participating in the conversation
2. Have funny stories about all the strip clubs that I've gone to with any regularity -- and stories about the club they're in always meet item #1 above
3. Always do shots with the girls, and that gives us both a sense of comraderie, and generates some funny conversation itself (about last time she did that kind of shot, or what her favorite shot is, or why she doesn't drink tequila anymore, or how my buddy got the waitress drunk on the very type of shot we're drinking now, or ...)
In short, be mindful enough to take note of what kinds of conversations strippers love, have some backup stories, build up some stories about the club you're in, and for heaven's sake, buy the bitch some vokka. Once you loosen her up a bit and she's not in "oh no, another guy who has nothing to say" mode, the majority of strippers are good conversationalists and have great stories to tell, you just have to get her having enough fun with you to get going
Personally, if she's hot and I'm attracted/thinking about getting dances, it automatically makes me interested in her and her life. If not I'll get general info about her and/or the club to be polite, but after approx 2 topics let her know I don't want to waste anymore of her time.
As far as topics, I flow with whatever she offers. I can pretty find a way to get interested in any topic as long as she has a sense of humor and able to have fun with it.
Good luck.
No disrespect, but stuff like this is why I often wonder if georgmicrodong is fucking with us! Especially the BDSM stuff.
I mean really, if a new guy started posting and he bragged about having a small dick and talking about BDSM what would you think?
I know that most people would think it was juicebox69 (or maybe the DoctorPhil guy) if there were spelling errors. But what if his spelling was acceptable? I'd still be suspicious.
To be honest, I'd respect georgmicrodong more if he was fucking with us. That would be kind of ace! ;)
She brought it up. The conversation was non-brilliant and I just nodded.
I do refrain from using "brilliant!" or "ace!" I save those for TUSCL! ;)
If the girl is a chatty one or good hustler she'll usually keep the convo going and bringing up subjects to talk about. It just varies. Last two strippers I encountered we talked about music and exercising.
But in P4P venues they know that they should not ask. So if you want to make a good impression on a girl, anticipate what she would want to ask, and then tell her yourself without her having to ask. You figure ways to let her know what she wants to know.
1. Employment
2. Marital Status
3. What area you live in.
4. Why you are in town and how often you will be there.
5. Things you are working on or that are important to you.
6. Why you are at the strip club, and why that particular club.
You find ways just to talk to her that are completely ordinary, but still give her all the answers.
Also, having done that you gently start asking her questions. Be gentle, but it lets her see that you are screening her.
It all comes down to talking to her just like you would any other girl, not as a sex worker.
SJG
Tijuana
http://doxyspotting.com/prostituta-stree…
http://doxyspotting.com/tanned-teenage-p…
It can be like a negotiation. Find a topic or topics that you are both interested in talking about. Most people stay away from certain topics like religion, politics, etc, if they want to avoid potential disagreements over something they wished they never mentioned. What do you talk to your friends about?
This is because in his Master-Slave society of the future, strippers won't really count for much. But know what, most of us will count for even less than they do in Dougster's vision of the future.
SJG