We have spent a lot of time over several months together OTC and ITC. We have had a many deep discussions on a wide variety of subjects. On more than one occasion recently she has brought up the subject of shacking up or getting married. Is there the slightest chance of this going well even if it is real?
Please, please, please don't do this. Even I--I who reached the depths of PL abasement and degradation especially with my ATF--even I would not live with or marry my ATF.
How rich are you? What will the allimony or child support or divorce cost? If you have little income or assets like she does, and you are fine with an open relationship go ahead, else run, or lead her on before she realizes you wont.
Too many unanswered questions to begin to answer your question.
1. What's the difference in your ages ?
2. Either or both previously married?
3. How are your respective financial positions?
4. Does/would she keep dancing?
A. If yes, how'd you feel about that's?
B. If no, does she expect to work? Does she have a sale able skill, other than dancing?
5. Is this something you want? Really want?
If those are adequately addressed a trial period of living together is a possibility.
Regardless, you'll find that most of the guys here will put your odds of success at or about the equivalent of finding a rainbow unicorn with a winning lottery ticket stuck to its sparkly hoof.
How rich are you?
Skilled working class.
What will the alimony or child support or divorce cost?
No alimony or child support.
1. What's the difference in your ages ?
She's 30, I'm 50
2. Either or both previously married?
Both
3. How are your respective financial positions?
Not wealthy but stable
4. Does/would she keep dancing?
Most likely
A. If yes, how'd you feel about that's?
She's a dancer not a ho, I'm ok.
B. If no, does she expect to work? Does she have a sale able skill, other than dancing?
5. Is this something you want? Really want?
In a perfect world, yes. With all the ramifications, I foresee disaster.
I had a long distance relationship with a dancer who lived far away from me who wanted to be the next Mrs S, but she didn't know there already was a Mrs S.
She wanted someone to take care of her so she could stay home, have a kid, do yoga and housewife shit. Even though she came from nothing and had nothing, it was amazing what her expectations were if she were to marry someone. She obviously watched too many "real housewives of ..." episodes. If I would have done that I would have been husband number 5. She did find some guy to marry her and become husband number 5 eventually, that was 3 years ago, and she's already divorced again.
I think your age difference is too great for that to work. Unless she's extremely mature for her age, just let her talk her talk and nod your head next time she brings it up.
Thanks all. I knew I could count on a reality check here. It is the ultimate fantasy for me to imagine waking up to her every morning, but I think it is just part of the package that she wants me to believe it, and I don't wish to call her bluff. I like the ride the way it is. and the harsh reality is that no one is easy to live with. Guess I am just another SW PL after all, huh?
I think the biggest risk with these type of relationships is the lure of easy money. Sancho can't buy the honey a purse she wants but Lone Wolf sure as fuck can and it'll only mean a couple hours at a hotel. No one will ever know.
Living together would probably lead to some good times but most likely would end badly. But it would also give us some good stories.
However, never ever ever even for a second should you even kinda of think about marriage. I might live with my DS for a little while but I would never even think seriously of marrying her.
Marriage is a crap shoot to begin with. Marriage to a stripper is insane.
I know two strippers who are engaged and one that is married. All three are f--king other men. The two engaged women are doing OTC with a few regulars and don't plan to stop and the married one had another guy and never gave him up.
If you decide to do it, please post often.
I know a few strippers that transitioned to a normal life after marriage. It was painful for both the husband and the wife. I know of many more that ended in disaster.
None of the women completely trust their husbands after seeing men in the clubs. They have unrealistic expectations when it comes to earnings. they often are strippers because of a series of bad choices. These women don't develop wisdom and self restraint over night.
on the other side, the man has unrealistic expectations about a wild sex life. he likely values his wife's beauty and sexuality more than her other qualities. Long before these fade, he will tire of her and dream of a new CF.
And sure as the sun rises in the east, during a fight, he will throw her past in her face.
I don't think marriage will improve the OTC experience. Marriage is work, even under the best of circumstances. The fantasy will dissipate. Unless you're willing to accept the lifetime of negotiation, financial bullshit and other crap that goes with marriage, I'd suggest enjoying the relationship for what it is now, and when it's time to move on, move on.
I think you fooled yourself. She's doing this (dancing) to make money off you. If she says yes, it's to make more money. Do what you want, but you'll be broke in a couple of years, stable salary is not enough for their normal income. Strippers make 6 figures (probably well into it if they were like this one).
I'd recommend you steer clear of marrying her. Her feelings may be honest - and I'm not doubting that. If you have strong feelings for her too - then I'd say there's a good start.
You've seen her and not paid - correct? If your answer is yes - then my question below is pertinent. If your answer is no - forget your feelings - and forget hers too - as she wants a commitment from your wallet.
If you believe her desire is true - look at who would benefit more from marriage - and who would benefit more if the marriage ended. If the answer is her - then you might want to think twice. I'm guessing her income is mostly undeclared - so a stable steady income would be a major benefit for her.
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1. What's the difference in your ages ?
2. Either or both previously married?
3. How are your respective financial positions?
4. Does/would she keep dancing?
A. If yes, how'd you feel about that's?
B. If no, does she expect to work? Does she have a sale able skill, other than dancing?
5. Is this something you want? Really want?
If those are adequately addressed a trial period of living together is a possibility.
Regardless, you'll find that most of the guys here will put your odds of success at or about the equivalent of finding a rainbow unicorn with a winning lottery ticket stuck to its sparkly hoof.
That includes me, for what it's worth.
Skilled working class.
What will the alimony or child support or divorce cost?
No alimony or child support.
1. What's the difference in your ages ?
She's 30, I'm 50
2. Either or both previously married?
Both
3. How are your respective financial positions?
Not wealthy but stable
4. Does/would she keep dancing?
Most likely
A. If yes, how'd you feel about that's?
She's a dancer not a ho, I'm ok.
B. If no, does she expect to work? Does she have a sale able skill, other than dancing?
5. Is this something you want? Really want?
In a perfect world, yes. With all the ramifications, I foresee disaster.
I had a long distance relationship with a dancer who lived far away from me who wanted to be the next Mrs S, but she didn't know there already was a Mrs S.
She wanted someone to take care of her so she could stay home, have a kid, do yoga and housewife shit. Even though she came from nothing and had nothing, it was amazing what her expectations were if she were to marry someone. She obviously watched too many "real housewives of ..." episodes. If I would have done that I would have been husband number 5. She did find some guy to marry her and become husband number 5 eventually, that was 3 years ago, and she's already divorced again.
I think your age difference is too great for that to work. Unless she's extremely mature for her age, just let her talk her talk and nod your head next time she brings it up.
However, never ever ever even for a second should you even kinda of think about marriage. I might live with my DS for a little while but I would never even think seriously of marrying her.
Marriage is a crap shoot to begin with. Marriage to a stripper is insane.
But of she wants to date and fuck you for free? Why not?
I know a few strippers that transitioned to a normal life after marriage. It was painful for both the husband and the wife. I know of many more that ended in disaster.
None of the women completely trust their husbands after seeing men in the clubs. They have unrealistic expectations when it comes to earnings. they often are strippers because of a series of bad choices. These women don't develop wisdom and self restraint over night.
on the other side, the man has unrealistic expectations about a wild sex life. he likely values his wife's beauty and sexuality more than her other qualities. Long before these fade, he will tire of her and dream of a new CF.
And sure as the sun rises in the east, during a fight, he will throw her past in her face.
I’ve never been married – but even people with seemingly good-marriages say marriage is tough.
Why get married? If one wants kids I can see being married; o/w why not just be BF/GF – marriage for an aging dancer is often the next career-move.
You've seen her and not paid - correct? If your answer is yes - then my question below is pertinent. If your answer is no - forget your feelings - and forget hers too - as she wants a commitment from your wallet.
If you believe her desire is true - look at who would benefit more from marriage - and who would benefit more if the marriage ended. If the answer is her - then you might want to think twice. I'm guessing her income is mostly undeclared - so a stable steady income would be a major benefit for her.