How long does it take for a dancer to remember you?

avatar for footballguy
footballguy
NC
I went to a nearby SC about a week and a half ago. I got a few LD's from a couple different dancers. As I was about to leave I saw a different dancer on the stage. She sucked me right back in and I got a few LD's from her before going back to the VIP room with her. I am a fairly shy guy so I didn't talk with her too much before or after the dances but I did tell her my name. I can't remember if I really told her anything else about me but I did give her a nice tip when we were done. She even seemed surprised by it cause she asked if I was sure I wanted to give her that much. There was just something about her that was incredibly sexy and I couldn't wait to see her again.

So about a week and a half after that I came back hoping to see her again. After I was there for a while she showed up for her shift. She approached me but she acted like she didn't remember me at all. I could understand her not knowing my name but I would have thought I would have at least seemed familiar to her.

I got a few more LD's from her and went back to the VIP room again. I thought for sure once we got back to the VIP room she would kind of remember me but she didn't.

I finally figured out why I like this dancer so much too. She doesn't look like she should be a stripper. No tattoos or any of the other cliches. She looks like the type of girl that you'd be proud to take home to meet your parents.

I'm not complaining, I just wondered is it normal that she didn't remember me at all? Does it take a few visits before a dancer will remember you? I guess in a way it's good she didn't remember me, at least I know there wasn't anything bad about me that stood out. Or was she testing me to see if I remembered her? Before I got any LD's on the second visit she asked me if I had ever been in The VIP room.

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avatar for SlickSpic
SlickSpic
10 years ago
The moment a dancer meets me, she never forgets me. Maybe it's the restraining orders...
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
10 years ago
Normally, I'd expect someone to at least remember my face somewhat after only a week and a half. But I've seen what you describe happen far too often with dancers to be surprised by it anymore.

She likely either sees enough people that you blend in or was drunk, high or otherwise altered enough to *actually* not remember you. Don't sweat it. If you spend money on her and she *still* doesn't remember you, spend your money elsewhere and see what happens.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
10 years ago
I agree with George and add that these women meet a lot of guys in a day. I remember the good and the bad but can't remember the ones in between. I'm sure it must be similar for strippers.
avatar for rockstar666
rockstar666
10 years ago
I'm amazed at how good the average dancer is at remembering people. This one seems to be the exception. But I remember fucking this Korean girl I picked up, and 6 months later ran into her again and she had no clue that we had sex before. Talk about a warning sign!
avatar for impala
impala
10 years ago
Had some remember me after only seeing me once and a couple of years have elapsed, had others I have seen almost every night for a month and had no idea who I was
avatar for steve229
steve229
10 years ago
"I remember fucking this Korean girl I picked up, and 6 months later ran into her again and she had no clue that we had sex before"

6 months? You know what they say about those Asian girls - an hour later...
avatar for steve229
steve229
10 years ago
"The moment a dancer meets me, she never forgets me. Maybe it's the restraining orders..."

Nah, it's gotta be your breakdancing moves
avatar for steve229
steve229
10 years ago
"She likely either sees enough people that you blend in"

We're assuming you're a normal looking guy, not someone with, say huge sausage like fingers that would really stand out
avatar for footballguy
footballguy
10 years ago
I forgot to mention, there was another dancer on the second night that I had also gotten LD's from a week and a half earlier that did remember me. I would have gotten a couple more dances from her but I was holding out for the dancer that was about to come off stage.

I was the only one that went up to tip her when she was on stage so I figured she would come up to me when she was done so I didn't ask her to come see me when she was done. Unfortunately someone got her as soon as she got off stage.
avatar for rockie
rockie
10 years ago
In general I would prefer not being remembered! While I make that statement in all sincerity, it is amusing to me who remembers what sometimes! One out of three times I am not remembered by a repeat dancer to me.
avatar for farmerart
farmerart
10 years ago
They always remember my Benjies.
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
10 years ago
I have to say that I have never had a dancer fail to remember me after a single meeting. I'm not sure why ....

Possibilities...

1. I don't remember because my eyesight and memory are failing.

2. The girls at the clubs that I frequent are all MENSA members. Well, probably not.

3. Ohhhh! This might be it! They all remember my 10-inch member! Oh, no. That's definitely not it.

4. Maybe it's the percentage of my $350K that I leave as a tip. Oops. Not that either.

5. Maybe it's my awesome sense of humor! Most likely so far ;)

6. Maybe it's because --- aww, heck. I have no idea.
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
10 years ago
@art: You use Benjie's in Canada these days? :-D
avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
As they say on stripper web, we are just wallets with legs. Many, probably most, dancers are not going to remember you under these circumstances. There are a few exceptions, girls who have great business sense and remember customers who are good to them. But they are a distinct minority.

If you want to be remembered, usually you need to do something to be memorable. For example, I am currently chasing a cute young thing with hopes of convincing her to do 0TC. At the least, I want to make sure that she continues to be increasingly permissive ITC. The problem is that I make it to her club only once a month at most. So I got her phone number, and I text with her for a day or two before a club visit. That way i'm not just a forgotten walking wallet. I may be only a wallet, but at least I'm not forgotten.

avatar for jackslash
jackslash
10 years ago
I would not take it personally. Some people are better at remembering faces than others. Some people have face blindness and cannot recognize faces at all.

http://www.cbsnews.com/news/face-blindne…
avatar for steve229
steve229
10 years ago
"I finally figured out why I like this dancer so much too. She doesn't look like she should be a stripper. No tattoos or any of the other cliches. She looks like the type of girl that you'd be proud to take home to meet your parents. "

A lo of guys like the non-stripper, girl-next-door look (no idea why) so she may be really popular and have so many custies that she wouldn't remember you after just one visit, especially if you were "shy" and didn't talk with her much.

Next time try to fraternize, er, I mean chat her up more. If you're shy, stick to topics that you're comfortable with, yet would be memorable and make you stand out in her mind, the the Russo-Finnish War for instance.
avatar for footballguy
footballguy
10 years ago
She does have that girl next door look which I really like. She also isn't as handsy as the other dancers, at least not until you get a LD from her ;)

But as much as I like that type there's definitely other times when I want a dance from typical stripper.
avatar for SlickSpic
SlickSpic
10 years ago
I spent part of my youth living in a mostly Samoan neighborhood. Girl next door for you might be a little different for me. Add to that the Mexican, Black, Filipino, and Okie hoods I've lived in and you have a wide variety of girls next door.
avatar for chandler
chandler
10 years ago
I've had strippers forget meeting me even later the same day. They'll stop by and introduce themselves and ask how I'm doing, blah blah blah. Then, an hour or so later, they'll come around and repeat the whole stale routine, as though they'd never seen me before. Typically though, it isn't anyone I've wanted to remember me, except to skip over me.
avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle
10 years ago
I had just the opposite happen recently. I was in a local club and had not been there in about three months. A dancer whom I got only two dances with on my previous trip, not only remembered me, but remembered my name. She said, "You told me your joke about how bras are sized." So, she remembered me from a joke I told. Not for my money.
avatar for gawker
gawker
10 years ago
When I first met my ATF we must have done 8 - 10 lap dances. A month later I went back to the club and she remembered my name, my job, where I lived, and many other details. I was so impressed that I ended up spending my life savings on her over a 5 year period.
avatar for goonster
goonster
10 years ago
It happens all the time, and I use it as a clue to separate the pros from the amateurs.

If you spend at least the average amount of cash on her the first visit, if she's a pro, you just got filed into the potential regular list. If she's not a pro, very unlikely that she'll remember you after one regular visit.
avatar for lopaw
lopaw
10 years ago
How long to remember me?
About a nano second.
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
10 years ago
" I'm amazed at how good the average dancer is at remembering people"

This is what I've experienced. Dancers, for the most part, tend to be very good at remembering people. And you would never expect that (unless the customer is a regular) because they obviously see many different guys each and every week.

I go to North Carolina a few times per year. When I'm there, I always go to a club called Harper's in Winston Salem and I've had a few dancers remember me even though it had been 4-5 months since I last saw them. Now I did spend money on these dancers, but not so much that it would make me very memorable. Yet, they still remembered me.

I've also had cases when I hadn't been to a particular local club in a few months--and yet a dancer I hadn't seen in all that time remembered me--although I only bought 2 dancers from her on my last visit.
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
10 years ago
2 dances*
avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle
10 years ago
I have also had dancers claim to remember me from "a long time ago." I know there's no way that some of them could ever remember me, because I wouldn't have spent any time with them. Much less any money. I don't spend money or time with dancers that are not my type.
avatar for impala
impala
10 years ago
Thing is when it comes down to it, they are in sales. The best sales people try to make a connection with their clients (past, present, and possible future), and repeat and/or future business relys on that.
avatar for MrDeuce
MrDeuce
10 years ago
footballguy, you say you're a fairly shy guy. Perhaps you're just not very memorable :) ?

All kidding aside, most dancers in busy clubs meet dozens if not hundreds of guys in a week and can't be expected to remember all of them. I am more impressed by the dancers I've never met who remember me!
avatar for nybxaw
nybxaw
10 years ago
No matter which girl I meet, they usually remember me. From the popular girl in high school who just shared lockers with me many years ago to my first stripper. I look like an average Latino to be honest. I don't know what it is but I better not commit crimes or I'll get caught easily.
avatar for PhantomGeek
PhantomGeek
10 years ago
"The moment a dancer meets me, she never forgets me. Maybe it's the restraining orders..."
SlickSpic, just gotta say "lol!"

Footballguy, don't feel bad about this. Like the other guys have said, these ladies can meet a lot of guys even in just a day. And not everyone has a memory for names and/or faces.

Back in the Twin Cities years ago, I had an ATF at one club; had been seeing her for years. Then one night, she called me "Steve." Um, yeah... I'm not Steve.

Another time, I saw an ad in Minnesota Connection for a massage. The woman in the picture looked damn pretty, so I gave her a call. I was really surprised when she said she recognized my voice. I had met her a year earlier at that same club -- and that was the one and only time we had met before that phone call.

And then on the flip side of the coin, back in February, a dancer at another Twin Cities club asked me if I could give her a ride home. (For some reason, her regular driver had to bow out, and apparently I didn't give her a "creepy old perv" vibe, so she felt safe asking me. And, yeah, I gave her a ride home and, no, nothing happened, doggone it all anyway.) I stopped by the club last month and the only dancer who approached me was this really pretty brunette. When she said her name, I had to ask her if she was the same one from February. That was her, and I felt like an idiot for not recognizing her right off. She hadn't really changed, but for some reason, it just didn't click right off.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
10 years ago
My experience has been like others; usually dancers remember me. IMO – I also think women are better than men at these kind of details; for the most part.

Strip clubs are what they are – the best you can hope for is to get good/fair value/treatment for your $$$ - anything else is just the cherry on top – so as long as she treats you well and you enjoy your time w/ her; that is what it’s all about – a PL should not expect to be “special’ in the eyes of a strippers – that is not what they (dancers) are there for and a PL should not have those expectations (if he is smart).
avatar for steve229
steve229
10 years ago
"Then one night, she called me "Steve."

That's was actually an awesome compliment!
avatar for motorhead
motorhead
10 years ago
"I've had strippers forget meeting me even later the same day"

Following Miller's Law, she probably met 7 other customers after you.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
10 years ago
I've had some strange things happen when it comes to strippers remembering me.

One club I used to visit maybe once a year, if that. As soon as I would walk in there was this one girl that always remembered me and my name. She remembered me every time after our first meeting and I probably saw her 4 times over 5 years. This was a large club with 100+ patrons on a weekend night (the only time I would go). That's impressive, bad part was, she gave the worst lapdances EVER and she was hot...what a dud.

I've had several others remember me from a year+ span but almost all of them couldn't remember my name. I was never offended because I often forgot their names 5 seconds after they told me.

avatar for curiositycat
curiositycat
10 years ago
They usually remember me after the first..not many women come in by themselves I usually stand out
avatar for footballguy
footballguy
10 years ago
I came back to this SC the other night when she was working. I hadn't seen her in a couple weeks and this was only the third time I've seen her but she remembered me this time.

I got to the club a little bit before she arrived. I was sitting at the bar talking with another dancer. After she changed she was sitting and talking with a guy but she kept making eye contact with me and giving me this incredibly sexy look.

She came up to me a while later and remembered me. I was gonna get a couple LD's from her and I had no intention of going to the VIP with her since I had already spent a good chunk of money before she arrived.

Well I had forgotten how great her LD's are. I knew they were really good but they were even better on this visit. She was a little more comfortable with me so I think that also made a difference.

Well after a couple dances she had me ready to go VIP with her. I know I got suckered in but she's worth it. Had a great time in VIP, and like the LD's, the VIP was even better than the other times I went to VIP with her.

On a side note, one thing that I think is funny cute about this girl: she almost always forgets to collect her money. When we were done in the LD booth she was getting dressed and and didn't mention anything about how much I owed. I just took out my wallet on my own and paid her. She laughed about it and thanked me and said she forgets to ask for the money sometimes until she gets to the bouncer area. And she's even almost forgotten to ask for the money after we are done in VIP too.
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