I like Rian, my stripper friend a lot. She is the alpha dog of strippers! Her sensual dances captivates the audience. There is a long line of guys waiting for her when she completes her routine. She tells me that she make a minimum of $500/night, and dances 5 days/week, which equates to $10K/month or $120k/year. I do not see what she does with her money. She lives with her drug dealer boyfriend who got raided by police recently. She has been in rehab once. She does extras in VIP, including BBBJ and FS. I have advised her to at least try to get a nice car, or purchase a condominium on a rent to own basis, or open a business selling stripper langerie. I have tried encouraging her to go to school at least to get some sort of career before her time runs out. Already, I have begun to see signs of the drugs taking a toll on her and the lack of sleep and proper rest. She is only 24. She says that she only takes Klonopin for anxiety, but I suspect that she is inhaling other drugs. I do not think that she is injecting drugs. She has begun to avoid me in the club, and only comes around when I bring her presents or promise to pay $300 for VIP. It is hard to break away from her, but I have begun to cultivate other friendships, including a stripper who is attending nursing school. Can Rian be saved before it is too late?
I was like you before. I would try to help get strippers get their life back on track. I finally realized that strippers are gonna be strippers. They don't care about your suggestions, they're gonna do what they want to do.
At the point when it becomes obvious she's asking you for money is the time to depart. Just giving some of your time to help her isn't so bad. You decide that for yourself. But, when the requests for money come, you know she's gone too far, and you won't be able to save her.
As a girl who works as an exotic entertainer in the industry, I must concur that this kind of unfortunate situation does happen. Many of the young girls and newbies become engrossed in a lifestyle that has destroyed the lives and careers of so many other beauties. Unless someone takes the time to educate these young ladies of the pitfalls that do exist in the industry, they will be continue to be prone to experiment with different substances in search of what they believe to be the partylife. Unbeknownst to them, this cycle hits fast, hard, and in a very destructive manner. (Let's face facts, customers want to see a 9 or 10, not a 2). And then these once gorgeous girls who procured flocks of clients, fall from grace quicker than their rise to in-house stardom.
I am personally very protective and offer guidance to the girls that I am close with at my club. Because many have clients who are very close to them, I've taken the time to explain that although what we do can be extremely fun and rewarding in many senses, first and foremost it is a business. As we have these clients with whom we have a mutual reliance with, part of our business includes caring for ourselves, maintaining ourselves, and treating our bodies like the temples our customers expect. By damaging our minds and bodies, we damage our business, our relationships with said clients, and our reputations.
UJAY - The choice is yours. But be advised, if you've taken the time to counsel her and express genuine concern, and now she is avoiding you unless you have money or gifts in hand, then the writing is on the wall. I'm sure that she was an extremely sweet girl, who showed the attention that you desired when you first became close. But if you fear the rumors are true, and her actions towards you are no longer consistent with those from the start, I would consider getting to know your nursing student. You would be doing Rian no favors by giving her money or high-priced gifts, if there is an addiction issue. As much as the entertainers deserve respect, you as a client do too...
I never listened or followed advice when I was 24, not sure if Rian can do different and listen to you.
Thing though is I've been around with dancers and strippers since when I was a teenager, like around 14. Some of my adult (+10 years older) relatives/friends that I used to hang have relationships with dancers.
I've seen these strippers go through stages of decay and they ended up wasted with just a shell of their former awesome self.
That's why I never went to SCs and only started going 4 to 6 years ago.
Yeah, some of those years I went occasionally with friends, but I never held this kindling fire desire to F a dancer and have a relationship with one. It's only recently that I went for it because I'm getting old and my life needs a little spark from these ladies.
Maybe Rian is different, you never know, but I do have a a feeling, a foreboding dancers mostly will trip over and run themselves to the ground later on when they reach around 30 to 35 years old.
A person will never change unless they WANT to change. Period. True with alcoholics, true with druggies, true with you, and true with me.
Any girl who has sex with strangers for money has got some serious emotional issues, whether you or she wants to believe it or not. And it is extremely unlikely that you or her or anyone else will change that.
And the only way it MIGHT START to happen, with only a TINY chance of success, is if she WANTS to change. And nobody, including her probably, knows whether she really wants to change, and do what it takes to change.
I recall seeing a news documentary on a group of people who attempted, as an experiment, to rehabilitate and bring into mainstream society a couple of homeless people in San Francisco. After a great deal of effort, and assurances by the homeless people that they truly wanted to get a job and live normal lives, the end result is that they preferred being in the street, and couldn't handle a job and responsibilities, etc. It worked for a couple months, and when they went back to check on them they were back in the street. Because behind it all, the real reason they were homeless was because of some serious mental/emotional issues. And these were people who seemed nice, normal, and just down on their luck.
So the chances that she will rehabilitate, especially as a result of your efforts, are slim to none. Well, actually none, but I'm an optimist so I'll say slim...
I just got a text (right this minute) from this dancer who I am crazy about, long black silky hair and that booty to die for. Her C cup boobies somewhat a little saggy last time I saw it, but still Penthouse standard.
We had this convo about stripping as stepping stone for her to get through college. Said she will bail out when she graduates then transition to fulltime work.
She goes to work once then twice a week. She texts me twice a week, we seem to be getting better in the relationship scale. She could potentially take the CF role soon.
Man, I'm still rooting for her to finish college and still be in one piece.
If I had a dollar for every stripper who has told me she's actually going to college, and just stripping on the side, I would have, well, a lot of dollars. And it's always some noble undergraduate degree they're going for. Like nursing, or physical therapy, or business, or criminology.
I had one black stripper who gave awesome lap dances, and always told me about her college work. But she kept telling me different majors. One day it was nursing, next day it was chiropractor, and on and on. After always seeing her in the club during day shift over a 5 year period, I finally realized she was just a stripper.
"Don't you have classes today?"
"Oh, um, no, I, um, went this morning or something"
I don't bother trying to change people or try to change their behavior mainly because people are only going to change if they themselves decide they want change. If you keep nagging someone trying to get someone to change, they are likely not going to want to see you after a while.
For those new to posting online messages, it really makes it easier to read your posts if you press enter every 3 to 4 lines to add space or a blank line every so often instead of seeing a big block of text.
I was given this helpful hint many years ago. Don't worry if it's not a full paragraph.
Thing is Ujay, hope you don't mind my critique here it is about your sentiment to Rian.
Why the fuck you wanna change her?
You came in one night, saw her on stage dancing, the booty and boobies you tried your boner so hard to land on. You should have just let that lusty feel take over your whole self.
Now, you have this sentiment you wanna save her.
Save her from what?
Can't you see she never had this kind of adulation before?
The money she's raking in every single F'n night, you wanna take that away from her?
You need to get your head checked, bro. She's young, her body can still handle the junk.
let's say give it 4 to 8 years max, she may be done. By the that time, she could probably have a degree or two, a business she can be proud of, for example, a Pho restaurant.
One of my favorites recently told me "I like you because you don't judge me". If you know dancers that will take care of you, why would you want to change them?
She won't change. You need to move on. I have been there and the more you are involved the harder it is on you. Set limits in your relationship with her and stick to them.
Thanks guys and girls for all of the great advice. I do agree that Rian can probably not be saved. I will try to keep my distance from her although she casts an intoxicating spell over me. I will probably need to stay away from this club. I no longer want to enrich the club owners with long periods in the VIP speaking with Rian. Unless she gets her act together, she will eventually be the loser. I do not criticize girls who chose to dance, provided it serves a higher purpose. I have promised Rian to help with school fees if she provides a transcript. So far, none is forthcoming. The club owners do not give a damn about these girls. They are a money making machine for the club owners. They advertise so called Hot Body Contests that recruit these girls right out of high school. The glamor of so called "modeling" and the financial windfall sweep them off their feet. How can someone who appears so gentle, kind, and soft spoken, yet is dangerously out of control a Rian.
There are two older strippers in the club that are presently around 35 years old. They were once beautiful in their prime. Today, no one wants a lap dance from them, even if it is offered free. They go from one patron to another begging for lapdances, without success. I have paid one of them to speak with Rian to no avail. It will truly be sad if Rian eventually becomes one of these old strippers that have nowhere to go and no one wants them around. They hang around the club in the daytime waiting to provide all manner of favors. They can not compete with the girls at night. Sad; such is the life of the older stripper.
Just get in there and let your man-down-there have a party.
After your mini-dude is done, get outta there. That'll put a smile on your face.
Rian will take care of herself, she wants you really bad. Don't spoil it, bro.
That sexy booty and boobies of Rian are waiting for you. She wants you, but do not fall into that ROB story she is selling.
Make a plan, setup your waypoints, execute on each waypoint while eyeing the target. Just listen to what she is saying and say "Uhuh, yeah, uhuh, yeah. I'm going to finger you now, bitch."
When you are done, bail out.
Just like me, I just got a text from the long hair brunette, she wants me to see her tonight.
Man! I am not going to think about rescuing her tonight, though.
Off topic (but in response to a question directed to me)
ALABEGONZ - Yes, I'm the real deal. My apologies if I'm slightly better spoken or more well-written than you might stereotype an entertainer to be. As noted in my first post on this site, I am a degreed management professional who also works evenings as an entertainer. The picture on my profile IS actually me (taken two weeks ago) and I only joined the site to add what I thought would be a interesting and possibly well-received perspective from somebody who is currently working in the industry. The items that I have posted were not done so to offend you or anyone else, but instead serve as opinion from of the point of view of another exotic entertainer.
I hate to generalize and say all strippers are a certain way, but the vast majority of them don't want anything from customers except their money. A lot of them are train wrecks in progress. Even though the poor choices they make may be obvious and they could really use some guidance, they are not likely to be receptive to mentoring from customers.
There is one girl I've gotten to know pretty well over the last few months, and in some ways she is different from most strippers. I would categorize it as a strip club friendship. I've heard all about her piece of shit ex-boyfriends and her current boyfriend. At least this one has a good job and isn't physically abusive, but she's one of those girls that always has to be with someone. It seems ridiculous to me to stay with someone out of convenience; she says she wants to get married someday but would never marry him. Anyway, she's quick to offer unsolicited advice to me, but I know it wouldn't go over well if I returned the favor.
Who cares? I help people for a living but I am not at work in the club. I only help people who ask for help and sometime not even then. This is business and if you are looking to be a White Knight you are more fucked up then she is!
If you want to give advice to your ATF that is your affair whether she heeds it is hers. To many girls a regular is nothing but a wallet with an erection attached (a means to an end). Once you start trying to be her daddy or conscience she will develop selective hearing and only hear your money. Most 24 year olds think that they will live/go on the same forever, do not want to be saved and don't care a pussy fart about the future.
You have a choice: back off the advice and enjoy her fruits or move on and try not to make the same mistake.
I work in Higher Education ( Pot U) and I am well versed in degree requirements. I have yet to meet a stripper who was telling the truth about school. Sometimes I toy with them with questions about their classes just to see how far they will take it. Some of them ,I think, believe their own BS.
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I am personally very protective and offer guidance to the girls that I am close with at my club. Because many have clients who are very close to them, I've taken the time to explain that although what we do can be extremely fun and rewarding in many senses, first and foremost it is a business. As we have these clients with whom we have a mutual reliance with, part of our business includes caring for ourselves, maintaining ourselves, and treating our bodies like the temples our customers expect. By damaging our minds and bodies, we damage our business, our relationships with said clients, and our reputations.
UJAY - The choice is yours. But be advised, if you've taken the time to counsel her and express genuine concern, and now she is avoiding you unless you have money or gifts in hand, then the writing is on the wall. I'm sure that she was an extremely sweet girl, who showed the attention that you desired when you first became close. But if you fear the rumors are true, and her actions towards you are no longer consistent with those from the start, I would consider getting to know your nursing student. You would be doing Rian no favors by giving her money or high-priced gifts, if there is an addiction issue. As much as the entertainers deserve respect, you as a client do too...
I never listened or followed advice when I was 24, not sure if Rian can do different and listen to you.
Thing though is I've been around with dancers and strippers since when I was a teenager, like around 14. Some of my adult (+10 years older) relatives/friends that I used to hang have relationships with dancers.
I've seen these strippers go through stages of decay and they ended up wasted with just a shell of their former awesome self.
That's why I never went to SCs and only started going 4 to 6 years ago.
Yeah, some of those years I went occasionally with friends, but I never held this kindling fire desire to F a dancer and have a relationship with one. It's only recently that I went for it because I'm getting old and my life needs a little spark from these ladies.
Maybe Rian is different, you never know, but I do have a a feeling, a foreboding dancers mostly will trip over and run themselves to the ground later on when they reach around 30 to 35 years old.
A person will never change unless they WANT to change. Period. True with alcoholics, true with druggies, true with you, and true with me.
Any girl who has sex with strangers for money has got some serious emotional issues, whether you or she wants to believe it or not. And it is extremely unlikely that you or her or anyone else will change that.
And the only way it MIGHT START to happen, with only a TINY chance of success, is if she WANTS to change. And nobody, including her probably, knows whether she really wants to change, and do what it takes to change.
I recall seeing a news documentary on a group of people who attempted, as an experiment, to rehabilitate and bring into mainstream society a couple of homeless people in San Francisco. After a great deal of effort, and assurances by the homeless people that they truly wanted to get a job and live normal lives, the end result is that they preferred being in the street, and couldn't handle a job and responsibilities, etc. It worked for a couple months, and when they went back to check on them they were back in the street. Because behind it all, the real reason they were homeless was because of some serious mental/emotional issues. And these were people who seemed nice, normal, and just down on their luck.
So the chances that she will rehabilitate, especially as a result of your efforts, are slim to none. Well, actually none, but I'm an optimist so I'll say slim...
Sure you are, jerkoffson (<- clueless).
Dude, you said stepping stone.
I just got a text (right this minute) from this dancer who I am crazy about, long black silky hair and that booty to die for. Her C cup boobies somewhat a little saggy last time I saw it, but still Penthouse standard.
We had this convo about stripping as stepping stone for her to get through college. Said she will bail out when she graduates then transition to fulltime work.
She goes to work once then twice a week. She texts me twice a week, we seem to be getting better in the relationship scale. She could potentially take the CF role soon.
Man, I'm still rooting for her to finish college and still be in one piece.
I had one black stripper who gave awesome lap dances, and always told me about her college work. But she kept telling me different majors. One day it was nursing, next day it was chiropractor, and on and on. After always seeing her in the club during day shift over a 5 year period, I finally realized she was just a stripper.
"Don't you have classes today?"
"Oh, um, no, I, um, went this morning or something"
For those new to posting online messages, it really makes it easier to read your posts if you press enter every 3 to 4 lines to add space or a blank line every so often instead of seeing a big block of text.
I was given this helpful hint many years ago. Don't worry if it's not a full paragraph.
Why the fuck you wanna change her?
You came in one night, saw her on stage dancing, the booty and boobies you tried your boner so hard to land on. You should have just let that lusty feel take over your whole self.
Now, you have this sentiment you wanna save her.
Save her from what?
Can't you see she never had this kind of adulation before?
The money she's raking in every single F'n night, you wanna take that away from her?
You need to get your head checked, bro. She's young, her body can still handle the junk.
let's say give it 4 to 8 years max, she may be done. By the that time, she could probably have a degree or two, a business she can be proud of, for example, a Pho restaurant.
There are two older strippers in the club that are presently around 35 years old. They were once beautiful in their prime. Today, no one wants a lap dance from them, even if it is offered free. They go from one patron to another begging for lapdances, without success. I have paid one of them to speak with Rian to no avail. It will truly be sad if Rian eventually becomes one of these old strippers that have nowhere to go and no one wants them around. They hang around the club in the daytime waiting to provide all manner of favors. They can not compete with the girls at night. Sad; such is the life of the older stripper.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dOFYEQ3p…
However, you are missing the point.
Just get in there and let your man-down-there have a party.
After your mini-dude is done, get outta there. That'll put a smile on your face.
Rian will take care of herself, she wants you really bad. Don't spoil it, bro.
That sexy booty and boobies of Rian are waiting for you. She wants you, but do not fall into that ROB story she is selling.
Make a plan, setup your waypoints, execute on each waypoint while eyeing the target. Just listen to what she is saying and say "Uhuh, yeah, uhuh, yeah. I'm going to finger you now, bitch."
When you are done, bail out.
Just like me, I just got a text from the long hair brunette, she wants me to see her tonight.
Man! I am not going to think about rescuing her tonight, though.
ALABEGONZ - Yes, I'm the real deal. My apologies if I'm slightly better spoken or more well-written than you might stereotype an entertainer to be. As noted in my first post on this site, I am a degreed management professional who also works evenings as an entertainer. The picture on my profile IS actually me (taken two weeks ago) and I only joined the site to add what I thought would be a interesting and possibly well-received perspective from somebody who is currently working in the industry. The items that I have posted were not done so to offend you or anyone else, but instead serve as opinion from of the point of view of another exotic entertainer.
There is one girl I've gotten to know pretty well over the last few months, and in some ways she is different from most strippers. I would categorize it as a strip club friendship. I've heard all about her piece of shit ex-boyfriends and her current boyfriend. At least this one has a good job and isn't physically abusive, but she's one of those girls that always has to be with someone. It seems ridiculous to me to stay with someone out of convenience; she says she wants to get married someday but would never marry him. Anyway, she's quick to offer unsolicited advice to me, but I know it wouldn't go over well if I returned the favor.
"I, I, I, I, I'm not your steppin' stone"
Steve, I wonder if that song was written about a stripper?
You have a choice: back off the advice and enjoy her fruits or move on and try not to make the same mistake.