I get so annoyed reading reviews where guys give a nice place a bad rating because they sat in a corner and none of the girls approached them for a private dance. What, they're glued to their chair? They don't have the balls to approach the girl? They probably never tipped the girls on stage, so naturally the girls aren't coming over to visit the cheapskate. What's wrong with these morons? Personally I like it when girls don't keep pestering me, I'd rather do the asking myself, after I've had a chance to sit and watch for awhile. Tip the girls on stage, ask one to join you, and if she's tied up with someone else ask another one. Is that so hard to understand?
Topless, as I've said before, that's been my experience too. Girls are often very flattered when you go out of your way to approach them. Or at least they pretend to be, which amounts to the same thing as far as good laps go. Plus they proabaly think they have a shot at a bunch of multiple dances if they do their best, and with me that usually turns out to be right.
Topless, I need to go to your club. In my (albeit, limited) club experience, I have NEVER enjoyed a dance when I approach a girl. Every time, I get treated like, "If I wanted to dance for you, I would have asked!" Lesson learned: I don't ask.
First off, I give WAY better dances to the men you ask me for the dance. Do you know why? Its because I know they are into me, they obviously want me to be the one who gives them thier fantacy, and I don't have to go thru the whole, hustle or rejection, or the "maybe laters". I am grateful for the gents. who ask me instead of me having to figure out, "hmmm... which guy looks like a guy who would want to get a dance with me". game. Also I just want to add, that I am VERY disapointed that Davids has come back to this board. I was planning on sticking around for a while again... damn!
Sara
Reavtj. sales people everywhere tend to look at prospective customers and, based on their experience, quickly decide whether we're for real or just kicking the tires. If they don't think that we're serious, they won't bother saying hello at a lot of places. Often they're wrong and the good sales people don't do this, but the lazy ones often do. Dancers are no different. I've had the same experience many times but it doesn't especially bother me. Even at a car dealership I'd prefer to be left alone to browse, rather than have some guy breathing down my neck. If I decide I'm serious, I'll grab someone. Same at a strip club. I prefer it that way. Different strokes ...
You folks have to remember that FONDL has much different motivations than most of the rest of us for going to strip clubs: Most of just want to go in and get a good LD from a hot chick and leave without a big hassle.
FONDL, on the other hand, is clearly looking for long term, serious relationship and is willing to go through as much money, effort and strippers as is necessary to acheive this goal. Hence his behaviour in clubs is going to be much different than the rest of us.
I just wish FONDL won't assume the rest of us have the same objectives he does when he starts threads like this.
My experice (limited) has been the exact opposite. If I approace a girl, she usually doesn't really want to dance for me, hence my post above--when it's over she grabs the money and runs.
I much prefer a girl work the floor and come to me, that way I know she's interesting in actually dancing. If I sit at a club all night without getting approached by a girl, I will write a bad review. As far as I'm concerned, that's their job. Think about it this way: What if you wanted to buy a new car, went to the dealership, and no one approached you or offered you any assistance? Would you buy from this place? I wouldn't (I actually had this happen to me at a dealership two weeks ago). If they just want to sit on their asses at the bar, I'm gonna let them sit.
Usually, if I see a girl from whom I want a dance, I will tip her while she's on stage. Then she will usually as me for a dance after she done, or ask to come sit with me and then offer a dance. Works out fine. :)
Komey, my experience is the exact opposite of yours. I've often noticed that if you approach the girl that she wil give you her best dance, if for no other reason than she already knows that you really dig her and figures her chances of getting multiple dances are much greater than the guy she had to approach. It's a big incentive for her to do her best when she's with someone that she knows finds her very attractive. If she does her best, it might even lead to a regular customer, which is what a lot of girls are looking for.
The only time I have ever complained about not having any girls come by in a review is at a club I attended with my wife. None of the ladies came over, and this was after tipping at the stage. Because it wasn't a "regular" situation, and the club had plenty of girls working, I was a liitle upset with the lack of customer service. I understand that some strippers have problems approaching couples (another discussion), which is why we were tipping the stage. It finally came down to going and asking a girl to come over - just something I don't like to do.
Nonody enjoys the high-pressure, no time to sit in between "Want a dance?" questions, but it is nice to feel wanted...
It's just plain more fun if they approach you: Then there's an element of suspense as to whether or not the transaction is going to happen or not.
If you approach her, you aren't even going to need a line and of course you'll get your dance.
(Then again, when I approached girls it was just because they were hot, so unless they were totally rude I already knew I wanted the dance. Maybe since FONDL is clearly looking for romantic targets, that is just the beginning of the interview process: "Hi, I am thinking of getting a dance from you and possibly starting a long term business relationship which I hope could lead to possible future romance OTC. Don't worry, if things work out there will be lots of money in it for you. Would you like to sit down at that there table so we can begin with a 15 minute interview?"
I'm not sure what you are complaining about when you talk about guys who complain about dancers not coming around regularly. Dancers should always be interacting with their potential customers when not in the dressing room. If they hang out with regulars, that's one thing, but if they are going to sit at the bar and talk to the bartender all night, that doesn't make them attractive to me. That suggests they are above their customers. I visit a couple clubs semi-regularly where dancers have a tendency to avoid their customer base and it drags down the club. I don't see the point of paying someone who isn't working hard enough to earn it.
On the other hand, you can't pin it all on the dancer. The customer has to make himself known. As I see it, that's what stage-tipping is for.
CasualGuy, I'm OK too with guys who just sit there, it doesn't bother me at all. What bothers me is when they then write a shitty review of the club because they didn't have any fun, when it was their own damn fault. Two comments in reviews really annoy me: when a guy complains that the girls didn't come around regularly (I personally prefer it that way), and when a guy complains that a lot of the girls spent all their time with their regulars (what do you expect them to do, shit on their regulars?) Both comments reflect a lack of social skills and a misunderstanding of how strip clubs work. Most dancers do what they think will put the most money in their pockets while having some fun at the same time. When a guy sits in a corner and just watches they'll usually ignore him because their experience tells them that he's not a spender and not much fun to be with.
Oh by the way, I'm perfectly ok with all of the guys who just sit there. It means less competition if I want to go tip a girl of my choosing when I see someone I like. Of course I may not be a typical strip club visitor in a strip club. I often change chairs or tables every 5 to 15 minutes unless someone is tying me up or I'm sleepy.
I think I have actually confused some dancers. Drinking a few beers usually gives me a big energy boost and I will walk around and go tip any girl I feel like even though I don't want to get dances. I'm just watching them up close. I thought about that after I went up to tip one girl on the main stage twice and then she came over to me afterwards and then told her I wasn't interested in a dance after she asked. Maybe I got in a habit of shifting chairs years ago because when I'm new to a club or lots of girls don't know I don't usually get that many dances, I get approached and asked constantly for dances. There are times when I wish I could just sit and watch the girls without dealing with someone asking me questions every 3 minutes. The first 10 or 15 girls seem flattering but after that it's gets old fast. hmmm, maybe if I sat like a lump on a log, I could avoid attention. Oh well, I actually get some entertainment watching some dancers hunt for me because I changed chairs again,lol.
"After you do get the dances then leave some doubt in the stripper's mind whether you really enjoyed her efforts or not. (You can hint at it, but leave the room for uncertainty.)"
I have to disagree with this statement. I don't necessarily mean to give an extra tip (unless you really think it was deserved). But little things like a smile or telling the stripper you enjoyed the dance is not a bad thing.
Always a bad idea to tip off to a woman or someone you are involved in a potential business transaction with how much you desire them or their product.
Have the girls come to you. If they don't just get dances from other girls to make the "hard to get" ones jealous. Wait them out. They'll come to you eventually (might be the next night you visit).
After you do get the dances then leave some doubt in the stripper's mind whether you really enjoyed her efforts or not. (You can hint at it, but leave the room for uncertainty.)
It's always a bad idea to get attached to one particular stripper. Have several you get dances from, so if one misbehaves you put on hold until she starts behaving more respectfully.
My favorite s.c. has something of a reputation as a place where the girls are not very aggressive about getting dances. I don't mind doing the asking. In some ways, I prefer being the one to do the asking, since it guarantees that I will always be talking to a girl that I am interested in getting a dance from. On only one occasion have I had any bad luck....a dancer during an afternoon shift told me that she had "promised" her shift to a regular, and therefore could not do a VIP with me. However, she did do a couple of couch dances for me.
Since I give preferential treatment to good customers in my business, I don't begrudge a dancer doing the same with her regulars.
I agree with shadowcat that initiating contact with a dancer does lower your negotiating position. I know some clubs where you almost have to initialte things, and I will do so if it has been a while since I have not been contacted by a dancer and I see a dancer I like.
Jesus titty fucking Christ! How hard is it? If you see a dancer that fills the bill then you call her over to your table. Or you could tip her at the stage and ask her to come over to your table when she is done with her set. Or you could ask your waitress to bring her over. If you just sit there like a tumor on a testicle then someone else will get what you want. Hard to believe that some guys are so pussy that they can't talk to a girl in a place where that is the whole point. I bet that you call phone sex lines but refuse to speak. Fuckin losers.
FONDL, I agree with you. I don't like to be approached for a dance because it distracts me from the stage show. And then to hear the girl start talking about her boring life---I'm there to look at naked girls, not to talk! But usually I have found that there are many more girls asking for dances than customers are purchasing them, so I don't understand why a guy can't find a girl to dance for him.
DD, every club I've evver been to is like that some of the time. If you're there when a bunch of regulars are too, you aren't going to get much action. Girls make most of their money off of their regulars, they'd be fools to ignore them to chase someone new. The trick is to go at off times when the regulars aren't there.
One of my favorite places has the unfortunate reputation of being a place where the dancers only hang out with the regulars. It's a place I don't visit often, so I am not a regular. But I am always getting dances, because I always tip the girls I like and ask them if they can stop by and give me a dance. If a club has a reputation of the dancers only seeing their regulars, that just means you have to tip and ask. I don't see what's so hard about that.
For me it is a matter of pride and/or self-esteem. I like it when a pretty girl come over to me and asks to spend time with me. I know that it is all about the money, don't get me wrong, But it is more enjoyable when she initiates. Plus you don't have the rejection factor. How many have asked for a dance and been told I've got 1, 2, 3, X before you, or I got a regular I need to see first, or Sure I'll be over in a bit and never have them show up? it reminds me of the loser who can't get laid in a whorehouse. If a girl asks, at least it shows shows willing to work. I've seen dancers sitting nursing a drink he whole time she is off stage. If she doesn't care enough about making money to walk around the floor, she isn't going to get mine.
That being said, I don't like being asked for a LP with in the first 5 min. of walking thru the door
Although in fairness I've been to clubs where you have little choice, you pretty much have to wait for the girl to come to you. I'm thinking of the c clubs where the stage is inside the bar, and after dancing the girls make their way around the bar collecting tips and soliciting laps. Sometimes if you're at the wrong end from where they start their tip walk, the popular ones never get to you. But most clubs aren't like that. And even if they are, you can almost always move to a better seat closer to the starting point at the bar, I've done that many times. I think some guys are just too intimidated to approach a dancer they like.
Stage-tipping does not always get you known. One club that I sometimes go to, the dancers don't always mingle with the customers. I am a tipper, and only my favorites will come over to me without me saying something.
Every time (and yes, I mean EVERY time) I have approached a girl about a dance, when she does get to me and give me the dance, she'll just grab her money and run when it's over. Sure, I know it's all about the money, but would it hurt to be nice about it? Lesson learned: If she's more interersted in talking to other strippers at the bar and not interested enough to work the floor, I don't bother.
As a side note, I'm not one of those guys who won't tip. If I watch the show, I will tip (I get plenty of attention from most girls, because I have a reputation for being a good tipper). Even if I have to chase her down when she gets off stage. But even then, I expect her to offer a lap/table dance--I shouldn't have to request it.
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Sara
FONDL, on the other hand, is clearly looking for long term, serious relationship and is willing to go through as much money, effort and strippers as is necessary to acheive this goal. Hence his behaviour in clubs is going to be much different than the rest of us.
I just wish FONDL won't assume the rest of us have the same objectives he does when he starts threads like this.
My experice (limited) has been the exact opposite. If I approace a girl, she usually doesn't really want to dance for me, hence my post above--when it's over she grabs the money and runs.
I much prefer a girl work the floor and come to me, that way I know she's interesting in actually dancing. If I sit at a club all night without getting approached by a girl, I will write a bad review. As far as I'm concerned, that's their job. Think about it this way: What if you wanted to buy a new car, went to the dealership, and no one approached you or offered you any assistance? Would you buy from this place? I wouldn't (I actually had this happen to me at a dealership two weeks ago). If they just want to sit on their asses at the bar, I'm gonna let them sit.
Usually, if I see a girl from whom I want a dance, I will tip her while she's on stage. Then she will usually as me for a dance after she done, or ask to come sit with me and then offer a dance. Works out fine. :)
If you approach her, you aren't even going to need a line and of course you'll get your dance. "
I dare say that most of the time, you also get a better dance from the girl who approaches you (although there are exceptions).
Nonody enjoys the high-pressure, no time to sit in between "Want a dance?" questions, but it is nice to feel wanted...
If you approach her, you aren't even going to need a line and of course you'll get your dance.
(Then again, when I approached girls it was just because they were hot, so unless they were totally rude I already knew I wanted the dance. Maybe since FONDL is clearly looking for romantic targets, that is just the beginning of the interview process: "Hi, I am thinking of getting a dance from you and possibly starting a long term business relationship which I hope could lead to possible future romance OTC. Don't worry, if things work out there will be lots of money in it for you. Would you like to sit down at that there table so we can begin with a 15 minute interview?"
I'm not sure what you are complaining about when you talk about guys who complain about dancers not coming around regularly. Dancers should always be interacting with their potential customers when not in the dressing room. If they hang out with regulars, that's one thing, but if they are going to sit at the bar and talk to the bartender all night, that doesn't make them attractive to me. That suggests they are above their customers. I visit a couple clubs semi-regularly where dancers have a tendency to avoid their customer base and it drags down the club. I don't see the point of paying someone who isn't working hard enough to earn it.
On the other hand, you can't pin it all on the dancer. The customer has to make himself known. As I see it, that's what stage-tipping is for.
I have to disagree with this statement. I don't necessarily mean to give an extra tip (unless you really think it was deserved). But little things like a smile or telling the stripper you enjoyed the dance is not a bad thing.
Have the girls come to you. If they don't just get dances from other girls to make the "hard to get" ones jealous. Wait them out. They'll come to you eventually (might be the next night you visit).
After you do get the dances then leave some doubt in the stripper's mind whether you really enjoyed her efforts or not. (You can hint at it, but leave the room for uncertainty.)
It's always a bad idea to get attached to one particular stripper. Have several you get dances from, so if one misbehaves you put on hold until she starts behaving more respectfully.
Since I give preferential treatment to good customers in my business, I don't begrudge a dancer doing the same with her regulars.
That being said, I don't like being asked for a LP with in the first 5 min. of walking thru the door
Stage-tipping does not always get you known. One club that I sometimes go to, the dancers don't always mingle with the customers. I am a tipper, and only my favorites will come over to me without me saying something.
As a side note, I'm not one of those guys who won't tip. If I watch the show, I will tip (I get plenty of attention from most girls, because I have a reputation for being a good tipper). Even if I have to chase her down when she gets off stage. But even then, I expect her to offer a lap/table dance--I shouldn't have to request it.