Been a lurker here paying $5 monthly fee to benefit from the massive collective experience of fellow pervs- and thankful for that. So have this ATF with whom i had CFS but the c broke once and slipped another time with me blissfully unaware. I believe she is an injection drug user(injection trails on back of her palms) and is also very casual about condoms. I worry about STD esp HIV. I am thinking of having her take a home based oral HIV test - how will that go ? will it freak her out ? anyone has any exp with that and tips on how to broach this with her ? The alternate is taking some HIV preventive medicine for 28 days with massive side effects or just hoping nothing will happen.
You're fine. I only go without condoms and nothing has ever happened to me. The media overstates the prevalence of STDs to prop up the $3b condom industry.
It may be easier to suggest that you both go and get tested together. That takes the sting out of putting the burden on her alone. Of course, you will pay for both tests, take her to lunch, wait for the results and then, when cleared, fuck like crazy.
IV drug users who are sex workers and casual about condom use is about as high a risk as you can have with a woman. That being said, HIV is still pretty rare but I would absolutely get myself tested and I like the idea of taking her too.
I'm not a condom user as a rule, but I also don't have unprotected sex with sex workers, let alone IV drug users.
Offer her money to go get tested and she will do it. If you expect her to go do it for free as a favor for you then you will end up getting ignored. Their time is money in their minds
If you're close enough to have unprotected sex, you should be close enough to talk openly about STD testing. My ATF is an IV drug user and has been for many years. She also likes to fuck and is frequently indiscriminate about protection. For the past 4 years we've been getting tested every 6 months or so and sharing our results. About a year ago she called me to tell me that one of her frequent partners had tested positive for HIV. It had been 6 or 7 months since she'd been with him and she immediately tested and came up negative. She showed me her test results and encouraged me to test again. She has Hepatitus C but nothing else (at this time)
Knowing that HIV can be present for long periods of time, she gets tested every 6 months, doesn't fuck this dude any more, and uses condoms far more frequently. She recently told me that it came out that this guy has known of his status for years but kept having sex unprotected with lots of women and still does. One would think that would be a crime (assault with a deadly weapon?) in my case it would be assault with a dead weapon, but what the Hell?
I had a girl say she would go with out a condom with me because I am older, healthy and clean. I told her I got to be older. healthy and clean by using condoms, at first to avoid paternity and later to avoid STD's as I stood up, zipped up and left her in the booth by herself. I do not want to go there with any girl who thinks she can tell whether or not someone is uninfected after meeting them 10 minutes ago.
Just ask her – IMO there is no reason why she should get upset – anyone w/ half a brain and *any* sense of responsibility would know/understand this is a responsible thing to do in this day & time.
IMO – the main reason she might get upset is if she *was* actually positive and did not want you to know in order not to lose your business.
If she gets upset about this; then this is someone you should not be w/ and you should move on – she should actually be glad you are concerned about STDs (for her sake and yours)
Papi posted: "Just ask her – IMO there is no reason why she should get upset – anyone w/ half a brain and *any* sense of responsibility would know/understand this is a responsible thing to do in this day & time."
That was good stuff. Seriously. ;)
You really think that a girl with track marks on her arms, and who has a reputation for giving it up bareback, is really a responsible forward thinker? Do you think that girls like the ones that psycho tuscl member bareback patronizes really want to hear anything about STD testing? LOL. I think he is going to be told to fuck off.
By the way Whatever, I don't believe for a second that the condom broke. I think it far more likely that you got caught up and just stuck it in. Further, the only reason I can see for asking her to get tested, as opposed to just worrying about yourself, is that you want to keep fucking her bareback. You do realize, however, that she is routinely engaging in high risk activities and could catch something tomorrow even if she has nothing today, no?
Rick, I am not that vain or stupid to lie when seeking help anonymously. But you are right when you say my intention is to keep the relation - not bareback though - i anticipate more such accidents and want to reduce risk.
I like the idea of testing together as suggested by some. if she declines i may end the relation or atleast keep sex out of it.
If someone is having sex with multiple people, I would worry she could pick up something and transmit it in between tests since I heard it can take 6 months to be detected. Of course if HIV ever started to spread like the flu, we might all be dead.
This is something that I thankfully don't have to worry about. But for you the only wa to ensure that she gets tested is that you both go and both get tested together. If you just hand over the money to her I guarantee that she'll use it for other recreational purposes.
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I'm not a condom user as a rule, but I also don't have unprotected sex with sex workers, let alone IV drug users.
Knowing that HIV can be present for long periods of time, she gets tested every 6 months, doesn't fuck this dude any more, and uses condoms far more frequently. She recently told me that it came out that this guy has known of his status for years but kept having sex unprotected with lots of women and still does. One would think that would be a crime (assault with a deadly weapon?) in my case it would be assault with a dead weapon, but what the Hell?
I am happy I misread your, "My ATF once SAT on me". I read a "C" between the S and A. :)
IMO – the main reason she might get upset is if she *was* actually positive and did not want you to know in order not to lose your business.
If she gets upset about this; then this is someone you should not be w/ and you should move on – she should actually be glad you are concerned about STDs (for her sake and yours)
That was good stuff. Seriously. ;)
You really think that a girl with track marks on her arms, and who has a reputation for giving it up bareback, is really a responsible forward thinker? Do you think that girls like the ones that psycho tuscl member bareback patronizes really want to hear anything about STD testing? LOL. I think he is going to be told to fuck off.
By the way Whatever, I don't believe for a second that the condom broke. I think it far more likely that you got caught up and just stuck it in. Further, the only reason I can see for asking her to get tested, as opposed to just worrying about yourself, is that you want to keep fucking her bareback. You do realize, however, that she is routinely engaging in high risk activities and could catch something tomorrow even if she has nothing today, no?
I like the idea of testing together as suggested by some. if she declines i may end the relation or atleast keep sex out of it.