Okay so I'm new to stripping and I've read absolutely every article on stripping, every review on clubs in my area, from all sorts of perspectives - new strippers, experienced strippers, regular custies, custies who like variety, ect. And I have a couple of questions for all of you that isn't completely clear for me. Do customers go strictly for extras? How common are they? Is there a certain type of girl that you know will probably do extras? And if you do go strictly for extras, why strippers and not escorts? Also, I've been working in the industry for about a month - yes , truly and complete and total newb, and I have made REALLY good money, not doing extras. I am always upfront with customers about this too. I don't play that hustle because I feel like if I promise they're gonna get something, it looks bad if I don't deliver that and they certainly won't be coming back. No, I don't expect guys to just pay me for my time and hand over gobs of cash. I work hard to make the customer feel special, important, I'm extremely sociable and will sit with them for quite some time before even asking for a dance. Despite me telling them I don't do extras, guys have still bought VIP dances from me. And I do let them TOUCH my body, just no sexual acts or touching anything besides boobs/butt, and even that is light, usually. I know this isn't fucking yahoo answers, but there are so many customers here and I really would be interested to see the discussion on this. Thanks
Most people on TUSCL are looking for extras. However in general I would say most strip club customers aren't looking for extras. I think extras is very common nowadays, although I'm not interested in extras.
No. But then the definition of what is an extra, might vary. I'm ok with no FS or BJ or even HJ, but at least I'm looking for a GFE, that would include kissing.
Some clubs don't seem to have any extras when I visit. Therefore I don't bother trying to get it. Of course if a girl looks really hot or I'm unusually horny or drank too much, anything could happen. Club rules and how strict everyone is varies from club to club and In different states. Would I like getting free bj's from a hot girl? Of course. Do I expect that in a busy strip club? Not where I live. I could probably get that if I agreed to date a dancer.
@ranukam
@motorhead
Thanks for your informative answers. I even paid for VIP I this site to get a deeper insight into what the customer wants and what makes them tick, and I've found this website to be mostly customers who want sexual acts or to form a SD /SB relationship with girl OTC. I actually really enjoy GFE type experiences with customers, and I've met some really amazing and respectful customers who , during a dance, will not even try to touch me. To the point of where I'll put my hands on my hips or kiss their cheek to let them know, I am okay with this type of innocent behavior that feeds the fantasy. I tend to avoid guys who ask me for extras straight up and I am kinda offset by this website because of the way the guys talk about the dancers. I know that a lot of them are spewing SS, all the excuses in the book. But there really are girls who really aren just trying to take you for all you have. A guy I danced for last night assumed we had done 5 dances, when we had only done three, and I was honest. But seeing this websites comments makes me want to up my hustle and fuck these guys over sometimes. But I wouldn't wanna ruin things for the guys who really come for the experience and appreciate me/my body, and my time.
I go to strip clubs for extras, but I get dances from plenty of girls who don't do them (or do but not the ones I want). If you're honest about it, *most* guys are gonna be OK with that, even though some of them may not get dances from you after that. Sure, there are a few that will spew vitriol, but they seem to be rare, based on my conversations with dancers.
Also, remember that the regular posters on these discussion forums are *not* typical of strip club patrons in general, at least based on my experience. Many, if not the vast majority, just go for precisely the fantasy you're providing.
@jester I feel like, based on the reviews on my club I've read, that a lot of girls do extras. I don't, but I still make money. So I'm not the kind of girl to sit in the dressing room and bitch about the girls who are doing extras hurting me "money". Because no one can hurt my money but me. If I don't feel like talking to people or giving attention or an experience, I don't go in. The only thing that concerns me is the way guys here talk about the girls like they come in for some easy sex, and I had a different idea of what dancing is. Maybe I've been seeing it wrong and strippers are nothing more than legal hoes with a pimp (the club).
@georgmicrodong
Thanks for that answer. I realize that there are gonna be customers like this, but this website blindsided me a bit with how many guys are this.
Many of tuscl's regular contributors are the bad boys of SC patrons - I am most definitely one of the bad boys.
Ranukam is dead right in his assessment of SC patrons. The number of us bad boys is only a minority of total SC customers. When you take one of us to the VIP you will quickly realize what type of customer you are facing.
Your single SC review is for a SoCal club. SoCal is not the cleanest area of the North American SC industry. If you haven't done so already, you will very soon encounter one of us horndogs.
@farmerart
Your comment made me laugh. Terms like "bad boy " and "horn dog" remind me of highschool. I guess I've decided there are also two types of customers that want extras. I think I have encountered both. One being, the guy that respect that I don't do extras and is happy to chit chat with me for a minute, tip me on stage, and run along to a girl that will be more suited for his needs. Then there is the guy that I will tell upfront that I don't do extras (as I do to each guy I have encountered from the getgo). , this guy will buy a dance from me, maybe even VIP , and keep persisting. He will try to convince me, change my mind, offer me larger amounts of money, ect. Honestly, If a guy does this ill give my manager a heads up. The club I reviewed is one that I have not worked for, but do frequent as a customer and have friends who dance there. I know for a fact this is a pretty clean-from-extras club. But the two clubs I have worked for have been a whole nother sort. I've worked in OC and LA. And yeah, you're right. It is not the cleanest of SCs.
@Dancinggal-You're safe at Fritz. The COI clubs, are another beast. The type of club that you work will be the indicator of accepted behavior and mores.
A club like Jumbos is basically a showcase for stage and pole work. Lapdances are not common. Got a place like Tropical Lei, on the other hand, and the gals are on you from the jump, asking if you've heard of their VIP.
@SlickSpic
Unfortunately, I don't work at Fritz. I work at a full nude club in a sketchy part of OC. I haven't reviewed my own club because I never attended as a customer, and I feel like it would be a biased opinion of a dancer that none of you guys will give a shit about how I think "bubbles" has a great personality and she alway loans me mints in the dressing room. No one fucking cares. My club definitely does extras, I talked with a customer last night who told me he frequently gets them. He was really nice though, tipped me really well on stage even though he wasn't interested in a clean dance from me. So yeah, I know girls do it. Even tough none will admit it.
Every club is different, I've seen some where there are no extras, and no touching, and others where three girls will offer your hearts desire before you can find a seat.
Ahhh. Another newbie dancer that makes good money without having to do extras, seeking advice on how our minds work.
I'm waiting for the day that we get a dancer on here that that would like to make more money and wants advice on how to ask a guy if he wants a blow job.
Do customers go strictly for extras?
Some do, but not all.
How common are they?
Depends where you work. Some place are zero ITC, zero OTC. Some places (Detroit, Greater Toronto) can be anything goes.
Is there a certain type of girl that you know will probably do extras?
Nope. There is zero correlation.
And if you do go strictly for extras, why strippers and not escorts?
To each their own. IMO there is a certain preview aspect with stripper who also play.
I don't really expect extra's but i'm happy to get them. And if so they are usually from a girl who thinks of me as her 'regular'. But i will say a lot of my stripclubbing is with the intent of eventually getting OTC. But i would be very happy with the GFE experience that you speak of.
You seem pretty sensible, and you seem to get it that, it the long run, it's best to be fair and have win-win dealings with people. But I don't think a dancer can make decent money, and only dance for nice customers. If you try too hard to like or be understanding with mean people, it's going to make you depressed and hurt your self-esteem. Well-adjusted guys, who are attracted by a woman's inner beauty more than her outer beauty, rarely or never go to strip clubs.
Strip club customers have one or more of these characteristics, to one
degree or another:
1) Obsessed with female physical appearance.
2) Lack of real empathy.
3) Sadism.
Custies whose only problem is #1 are the easiest to deal with. Other than lack of eye contact, they will be polite and friendly (within the limits of their shyness). It's hard to make decent money without dealing with #2. You have to be very assertive. I don't think there is stripper alive who hasn't had to walk out in the middle of a dance. You can be the type who keeps the money, or the type that throws it back. But don't say no twice, the second time, just walk out. The only dancers I've seen who can deal with #3 well are the ones who are sadistic themselves, they just out-dom the guy.
Some guys will seem empathetic at first, but they will see you as some stereotype, fallen woman, girl with daddy issues, nympho, etc.
Being the #1 type, I don't ask strippers for any genital contact. Most strippers tell me they find it as offensive as most other women would to be called a hooker. And they consider a request for genital contact to be calling them a hooker. If a stripper I liked offered me sex for money, I might do it outside the club. But not inside the club, due to modesty, and because it's not the norm in the clubs I go to. Dirty clubs get raided in part of the country where I live. I don't want be partly to blame for everyone in the club losing their job.
Do all customers go strictly for extras? No. Do I go strictly for extras? Well...
If you can make good money without extras, more power to you. You should not be upset about "the way guys here talk about the girls like they come in for some easy sex." Guys in general talk that way about women.
But why are you so dead set against extras? Couldn't you bring a little happiness into the lives of some of us poor pathetic losers? You're already dancing nude for men and letting them touch you. Why not move to the next level and give blow jobs to some nice, respectful customers? It's not poison.
If the club you work in is known as a extras club, and you don't want to do extras, then get out now.
I have never met a long-term dancer who didn't have extras with her special regulars.
Eventually you will meet a customer that you are tremendously attracted to. Sex is a natural outcome of physical attraction. So you will make an exception for him/her.
Unless of course you have no sexual desire whatsoever, which I can't imagine because you really have to enjoy working in a sexually oriented business if you want to succeed.
I don't expect extras from every dancer, however if a club is known for extras, then I expect to receive extras. I have noticed dancers have a confusion of what many guys mean by extras, so I will try to describe what a good dance without extras means to me, and likely a lot of other steady customers.
I expect the dancer to stay in contact throughout the dance, except for occasional pauses for her to catch her breath and relax during a very long series of dances. A dancer with decent lap dancing skills and who smiles sexily and doesn't have a bored look on her face will remain in my mind when none of my favorites are available.
What makes a favorite is a dancer who gives me all her attention from the moment she sits down, and throughout our dance, and makes our time togehter seem like we are only there for each other. Her lap dances have to be very smooth and sexy, with lot of two-way contact. She is also usually very good at teasing.
There is a lot of mutual fondling going on, especially with her breasts. When I am in a non-pasties club, she likes a lot of stimulation of her nipples, by my hands and mouth. While I am feeling her up, is fondling me just as much, rubbing her hands all over my body, especially using her fingers and moth along my crotch to tease me. I am not talking about whipping it out, and getting a BJ, I am just talking of rubbing, fondling or sucking and blowing through my pants.
Except with a exceptionally skilled dancer who is really trying to get her customer to cum in his pants, no matter how long and how vigorously she is grinding what I described is not enough for most guys to get off from a dance, even if we have been going at it for 20 or more songs, non stop, like I occasionally received back when I could get lap dances for $5 to $10 a song. So she had better not be afraid to get me too aroused.
Extras go well beyond what I described, and I rarely get extras unless I happen to be out of state.
@lopaw I worked at Skins gentlemen club in LA For
for a couple weeks. The girls were super desperate for dances and particularly nasty and bitchy crackheads behind closed doors. I will probably never work in another LA club again. Yuck.
@ilbbaicnl Thanks for your input. It was informative and honest. I also agree that a dancer showing her face on here is a pretty bad idea. I certainly wouldn't.
@jackslash It's a personal boundary of mine, that's all. I certainly have no judgements on girls who do it. That's their business. I just don't find it necessary to make my money and I DATE plenty of poor pathetic losers as is ahaha. Also, I'm not interested in catching a venereal disease or losing my job. I like what I do, I've taken a couple classes on human sexuality and the whole club dynamic fascinates me, I just have no interest in sucking strangers dick for money. Personal preference, that's all.
That's too bad, Dancinggal. I have been to Skin a few times in the afternoon and had a decent time but the dances are pretty expensive for what I got. Sixty bucks for a low mileage bed dance was a bit much. But don't give up completely on LA clubs! There are some decent ones out here...ever try Bare Elegance or 4Play? They are pretty upscale with relatively low mileage considering that it's LA.
@pabloantonio Its a business. My job is to sell a fantasy, and time. I am an entertainer, not a prostitute. There is a VERY fine line in this type of industry. If I was attracted to someone, it doesn't matter. It's a business. I'd enjoy that attraction, and probably love working with that customer way more than most. But the reality is, they found me in a strip club. There's a stigma to me of ever letting my persona and the character I've created blend into my real life. I'd be happy as a low earning stripper making what I make now, because I'm not doing this to make BIG bucks. I have a regular job. This is a supplemental income an as soon as I can't keep it strictly business, I don't want to do it anymore. Period.
Lopaw,
The girls are just terrible and the commute was long for me. I probably wouldn't drive out there again to work with snobby girls, but maybe, maybe a different club. And I do realize girls are the competition, but gosh, you don't have to be a bitter , jaded, used up stripper all the damn time. These girls were another breed of irritating.
"But the reality is, they found me in a strip club." I think you're going overboard. In life you have to be prepared for the worst, but hope for the best. Not all custies will stereotype you. Once you have regulars, you may start to trust that some of them are genuinely curious to know the real you, not any persona. Even so, it's unlikely any of them would be the right guy to date, but it's not 100% impossible.
As far as the way most,guys talk on here, the site has mostly male posters so it's easy to forget some females may read this information. However do all the guys care? Probably not. A lot iof guys get tired of being politically correct all the time everywhere they go so this site allows them to let loose. The not caring fact is probably due to thinking most new female posters don't continue to post here longer than a month or two tops. There are exceptions. Plus the chance of meeting many is slim to none. The attitude probably changes if she is in the immediate area.
Some of the other guys posting on here I wouldn't talk to in a normal day.
As far as the male posters on here being attracted to female looks, if you aren't interested in female looks, you aren't a normal guy. Every normal guy is attracted to female looks. As far as getting to know someone, what's on the inside is important but if you visit strip clubs, most people you meet you don't really get to know that well.
@Dancinggal... I'm glad you're getting useful feedback. You will get requests for pics. I always joke that female posters should post a pic o' their tits while they hold a sign reading "I dig the TUSCL PLs", ideally with a date... (No need to show a face for safety reasons). Nobody has taken me up...
There are some pretty obvious fake girls (I miss BBBJ Becky...) but it is always cool to have a female poster. But some of us PLs also maintain a healthy skepticism.
And if you don't dig the idea of extras that's cool. To thine own self be true!
Dancinggal, not every strip club customer is looking for extras (including me). Maybe not even a huge fraction. Stay true to yourself and be careful. There are some bad actors out there.
Being a selfish asshole is often not politically correct. But that's not a good reason to be a selfish asshole. Even if you don't care about being politically correct.
I think there are guys out there who are sexually satisfied only knocking boots with the woman who loves them, even as age/pregnancy/illness take their toll on her appearance. For those of us not like that, our "problem" is not being lucky enough to be that kind of guy. Doesn't mean we're the Devil incarnate or anything. Some women go around pissed, thinking we choose to be like that. 'Bout as dumb as thinking gay people choose to be gay, in my book.
I never ask for extras ITC. When I go into a club I find a girl that I like and immediately try to establish a relationship with her. If she is open to it we go to lunch, dinner, shopping etc. I then ask her if she is open to OTC. Most are but some aren't. If she isn't then I move on to my next choice and pursue her. My reason for going to clubs is to shop for girls to go OTC. I am looking for a GFE that goes beyond the club. I pay my girls $150-$200 per hour and they are happy for the extra money that they don't have to pay the club. They all call me and ask me "when will you be back in town?"
As others have said – most SC goers are not going necessarily for extras:
+ extras of course cost more $$$ - some custies may not want to pay that much and may be more content w/ the entertainment of LDs and some company
+ some married dudes actually feel that if they just get LDs; then that is not really cheating
w.r.t. to this site:
+ most on this site are hardcore SC goers – so the more one goes to a SC; the more he ends up doing
+ and even on this site; I would venture to say that half; or less; are extras or nothing SCers – may be more of a vocal minority thing.
+ w.r.t. guys on this site – it’s dudes (and lopaw) talking about women an sex – wth you think we were going to be discussing – writing love poems and talking about Martha Stewart – as jackslash mentioned – men talk about women and sex when they are amongst each other; even if they are not SC goers - and the dancers over at stripperweb.com often talk as negative about other dancers as we do here – and btw; you sure do come across as one of those stripperweb posters
@jestrite Some dancers think a custy should never ask them out, that it's inappropriate. They kindof have a a point, but it's a little overly prissy. I don't think most dancers would think it was disrespectful if a custy took a dancer out for a nice meal and/or took her shopping for a gift for her. But, after that, I would think you'd want to say "would you spend the night with me?" not "I'll give you $150 to pork me". Some would just come back with "no but I'll pork you for an hour for $300". Then again, I've heard stories of chicks who are big on PBP4P (plausibly deniable pay for play). Like they want an expensive gift with the receipt. Then they pork you and head for the store return desk.
As you realized, while the majority of us tuscl folk like extras, the minorities are the majorities of the regular type of strip club customers (me included). though be careful when you decide to immedietely tell the guy right before you dance you don't do extras, one could be offended that you even mentioned such a thing. I know I let a girl go because just got this attitude before we started dancing telling me she don't do extras. Very rude, and very unnecessary, and I soon found another who was less stupid to do that. Mind your manners.
If you are in an extras-heavy club; then yeah; it would be rough to compete and you will probably be constantly asked or even expected to give extras – so better to find another club.
Then there are clubs where extras are available; but not necessarily the main thing – so all types of dancers can make $$$ in these clubs.
In most clubs I go to where extras are available – I see way more custies heading to the lap-dance room for LDs than the boom boom room – so that should be a gauge as to whether you can make it in a club where extras are available but not the main thing.
And again w.r.t. guys on this site – there are guys whom go for extras b/c there are dancers whom give extras – you can’t blame a health male for wanting sex nor getting from a willing female – takes two to tango – in fact; I’ve been turned down by dancers for dances b/c these dancers where about extras (and thus the big bucks) or nothing - not the norm – but has happened to me
shadowcat: Reading about a dancer making a lot of $$ w/o performing extras is like reading about a guy owning a 400 HP plus sports car saying that he observes the speed limit at all times. I'm waiting for a new stripper to come here saying that she's stripping her way to a Masters Degree in Psychology. She creates an elaborate sexual/stripclub attitude survey ala the gent from Richmond. Says she'll use that as a basis for her upcoming thesis paper.
Sarcasm aside, OP should know that this is a stripclub review site. The serious contributors to DB constitute a VERY small percentage of reviewers. Yet OP appears concerned about how much longer she can continue to make good money doing what she does. The real situation likely falls somewhere between outright alarm, and "don't worry" approach. While tuscl extra seekers may be in the minority, the DB contributors likely visit clubs more often (and spend more $$) than most reviewers, maybe greater than 10 times more than a lot of patrons. So, if hardcore extras seekers constitute 5% of total clubgoers, their much greater level of patronage means that OP may encounter extras seekers ~ 50% of time.
Actually, OP has (or should have) a better idea than we do of how rampant extras seekers are. Tuscler only knows what he(she) and maybe a handful of buds want. OP working 2-5 shifts per week encounters far more customers than we do, so has a larger handle on club patron tastes. (I very rarely strike up conversation with other club patrons.)
A recent fav of mine did non-extras dancing in a club were most girls did extras. She only made so-so money, but the club was in a small town along I-95. She felt like she had the edge looks-wise over the extras girls, who were mostly junkies. She left because (besides being sick of dancing in general) it got old to have both management and the other dancers always trying to rip her off.
@Dancinggal: If you've answered this and I missed it, I'm sorry. What do *you* consider an extra? I didn't include blow jobs and intercourse, as I'm reasonably certain you consider those extras. :)
1. Playing with/touching boobs, nipples and butt.
2. Touching the outside of your vagina.
3. Finger(s) in your vagina.
4. Grinding a guy, using your butt or boobs, over his pants until he cums.
5. Rubbing a guy with your hand, from outside his pants, until he cums.
6. Reaching into his pants for a handjob until he cums.
7. Pulling his dick out for a handjob.
You've definitely gotten some good feedback already, but I’d like to add my own two cents.
A dancer and I last week were discussing lapdances when she told me that for a certain amount of money she’d get a condom from her locker for a full service dance. I admit the idea was exciting, but I passed; it’s just not what I’m looking for. A dancer who allows more isn't necessarily better. Some dancers are very mechanical in private, which can be off-putting. I like it when she gets close all over, teases, takes it slow, talks to me, and lets her hands run along my legs. And, yes, I enjoy a good lap grind as much as the next guy.
Not all dancers are every guy’s type, and not all approaches are what every guy is looking for. But from my perspective, if you make him feel wanted, allow a little touching, and are honest and consistent about your rules, you’ll attract a loyal following.
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No. But then the definition of what is an extra, might vary. I'm ok with no FS or BJ or even HJ, but at least I'm looking for a GFE, that would include kissing.
@motorhead
Thanks for your informative answers. I even paid for VIP I this site to get a deeper insight into what the customer wants and what makes them tick, and I've found this website to be mostly customers who want sexual acts or to form a SD /SB relationship with girl OTC. I actually really enjoy GFE type experiences with customers, and I've met some really amazing and respectful customers who , during a dance, will not even try to touch me. To the point of where I'll put my hands on my hips or kiss their cheek to let them know, I am okay with this type of innocent behavior that feeds the fantasy. I tend to avoid guys who ask me for extras straight up and I am kinda offset by this website because of the way the guys talk about the dancers. I know that a lot of them are spewing SS, all the excuses in the book. But there really are girls who really aren just trying to take you for all you have. A guy I danced for last night assumed we had done 5 dances, when we had only done three, and I was honest. But seeing this websites comments makes me want to up my hustle and fuck these guys over sometimes. But I wouldn't wanna ruin things for the guys who really come for the experience and appreciate me/my body, and my time.
Setting that aside Ranukman pretty much hit the nail on the head.
Also, remember that the regular posters on these discussion forums are *not* typical of strip club patrons in general, at least based on my experience. Many, if not the vast majority, just go for precisely the fantasy you're providing.
Thanks for that answer. I realize that there are gonna be customers like this, but this website blindsided me a bit with how many guys are this.
Ranukam is dead right in his assessment of SC patrons. The number of us bad boys is only a minority of total SC customers. When you take one of us to the VIP you will quickly realize what type of customer you are facing.
Your single SC review is for a SoCal club. SoCal is not the cleanest area of the North American SC industry. If you haven't done so already, you will very soon encounter one of us horndogs.
Your comment made me laugh. Terms like "bad boy " and "horn dog" remind me of highschool. I guess I've decided there are also two types of customers that want extras. I think I have encountered both. One being, the guy that respect that I don't do extras and is happy to chit chat with me for a minute, tip me on stage, and run along to a girl that will be more suited for his needs. Then there is the guy that I will tell upfront that I don't do extras (as I do to each guy I have encountered from the getgo). , this guy will buy a dance from me, maybe even VIP , and keep persisting. He will try to convince me, change my mind, offer me larger amounts of money, ect. Honestly, If a guy does this ill give my manager a heads up. The club I reviewed is one that I have not worked for, but do frequent as a customer and have friends who dance there. I know for a fact this is a pretty clean-from-extras club. But the two clubs I have worked for have been a whole nother sort. I've worked in OC and LA. And yeah, you're right. It is not the cleanest of SCs.
A club like Jumbos is basically a showcase for stage and pole work. Lapdances are not common. Got a place like Tropical Lei, on the other hand, and the gals are on you from the jump, asking if you've heard of their VIP.
Unfortunately, I don't work at Fritz. I work at a full nude club in a sketchy part of OC. I haven't reviewed my own club because I never attended as a customer, and I feel like it would be a biased opinion of a dancer that none of you guys will give a shit about how I think "bubbles" has a great personality and she alway loans me mints in the dressing room. No one fucking cares. My club definitely does extras, I talked with a customer last night who told me he frequently gets them. He was really nice though, tipped me really well on stage even though he wasn't interested in a clean dance from me. So yeah, I know girls do it. Even tough none will admit it.
Dancinggal - what club(s) in LA have you worked?
I'm waiting for the day that we get a dancer on here that that would like to make more money and wants advice on how to ask a guy if he wants a blow job.
Some do, but not all.
How common are they?
Depends where you work. Some place are zero ITC, zero OTC. Some places (Detroit, Greater Toronto) can be anything goes.
Is there a certain type of girl that you know will probably do extras?
Nope. There is zero correlation.
And if you do go strictly for extras, why strippers and not escorts?
To each their own. IMO there is a certain preview aspect with stripper who also play.
Where the hell do you work? I'd LOVE a GFE with a stripper. totally cool with that. Kind of a fantasy of mine
Strip club customers have one or more of these characteristics, to one
degree or another:
1) Obsessed with female physical appearance.
2) Lack of real empathy.
3) Sadism.
Custies whose only problem is #1 are the easiest to deal with. Other than lack of eye contact, they will be polite and friendly (within the limits of their shyness). It's hard to make decent money without dealing with #2. You have to be very assertive. I don't think there is stripper alive who hasn't had to walk out in the middle of a dance. You can be the type who keeps the money, or the type that throws it back. But don't say no twice, the second time, just walk out. The only dancers I've seen who can deal with #3 well are the ones who are sadistic themselves, they just out-dom the guy.
Some guys will seem empathetic at first, but they will see you as some stereotype, fallen woman, girl with daddy issues, nympho, etc.
Being the #1 type, I don't ask strippers for any genital contact. Most strippers tell me they find it as offensive as most other women would to be called a hooker. And they consider a request for genital contact to be calling them a hooker. If a stripper I liked offered me sex for money, I might do it outside the club. But not inside the club, due to modesty, and because it's not the norm in the clubs I go to. Dirty clubs get raided in part of the country where I live. I don't want be partly to blame for everyone in the club losing their job.
We have other dancer members here, here is one:
https://www.tuscl.net/u.php?UID=325869
You may want to read some of her posts. (She is the ONLY dancer on here who shows her face, I admire her courage, but I think it's a bad idea.)
If you can make good money without extras, more power to you. You should not be upset about "the way guys here talk about the girls like they come in for some easy sex." Guys in general talk that way about women.
But why are you so dead set against extras? Couldn't you bring a little happiness into the lives of some of us poor pathetic losers? You're already dancing nude for men and letting them touch you. Why not move to the next level and give blow jobs to some nice, respectful customers? It's not poison.
If the club you work in is known as a extras club, and you don't want to do extras, then get out now.
I have never met a long-term dancer who didn't have extras with her special regulars.
Eventually you will meet a customer that you are tremendously attracted to. Sex is a natural outcome of physical attraction. So you will make an exception for him/her.
Unless of course you have no sexual desire whatsoever, which I can't imagine because you really have to enjoy working in a sexually oriented business if you want to succeed.
I expect the dancer to stay in contact throughout the dance, except for occasional pauses for her to catch her breath and relax during a very long series of dances. A dancer with decent lap dancing skills and who smiles sexily and doesn't have a bored look on her face will remain in my mind when none of my favorites are available.
What makes a favorite is a dancer who gives me all her attention from the moment she sits down, and throughout our dance, and makes our time togehter seem like we are only there for each other. Her lap dances have to be very smooth and sexy, with lot of two-way contact. She is also usually very good at teasing.
There is a lot of mutual fondling going on, especially with her breasts. When I am in a non-pasties club, she likes a lot of stimulation of her nipples, by my hands and mouth. While I am feeling her up, is fondling me just as much, rubbing her hands all over my body, especially using her fingers and moth along my crotch to tease me. I am not talking about whipping it out, and getting a BJ, I am just talking of rubbing, fondling or sucking and blowing through my pants.
Except with a exceptionally skilled dancer who is really trying to get her customer to cum in his pants, no matter how long and how vigorously she is grinding what I described is not enough for most guys to get off from a dance, even if we have been going at it for 20 or more songs, non stop, like I occasionally received back when I could get lap dances for $5 to $10 a song. So she had better not be afraid to get me too aroused.
Extras go well beyond what I described, and I rarely get extras unless I happen to be out of state.
I'm in OC, California. It looks like you frequent /live around the Austin SCs. Feel free to pm me for my club if you're in the area.
for a couple weeks. The girls were super desperate for dances and particularly nasty and bitchy crackheads behind closed doors. I will probably never work in another LA club again. Yuck.
The girls are just terrible and the commute was long for me. I probably wouldn't drive out there again to work with snobby girls, but maybe, maybe a different club. And I do realize girls are the competition, but gosh, you don't have to be a bitter , jaded, used up stripper all the damn time. These girls were another breed of irritating.
Some of the other guys posting on here I wouldn't talk to in a normal day.
As far as the male posters on here being attracted to female looks, if you aren't interested in female looks, you aren't a normal guy. Every normal guy is attracted to female looks. As far as getting to know someone, what's on the inside is important but if you visit strip clubs, most people you meet you don't really get to know that well.
But we do fawn over potentially female posters.
There are some pretty obvious fake girls (I miss BBBJ Becky...) but it is always cool to have a female poster. But some of us PLs also maintain a healthy skepticism.
And if you don't dig the idea of extras that's cool. To thine own self be true!
If you wish to remain a "clean" dancer, I suggest you work in a club with a reputation for being clean and don't give into doing extras.
Good luck. The non-extras guys will live you.
I think there are guys out there who are sexually satisfied only knocking boots with the woman who loves them, even as age/pregnancy/illness take their toll on her appearance. For those of us not like that, our "problem" is not being lucky enough to be that kind of guy. Doesn't mean we're the Devil incarnate or anything. Some women go around pissed, thinking we choose to be like that. 'Bout as dumb as thinking gay people choose to be gay, in my book.
+ extras of course cost more $$$ - some custies may not want to pay that much and may be more content w/ the entertainment of LDs and some company
+ some married dudes actually feel that if they just get LDs; then that is not really cheating
w.r.t. to this site:
+ most on this site are hardcore SC goers – so the more one goes to a SC; the more he ends up doing
+ and even on this site; I would venture to say that half; or less; are extras or nothing SCers – may be more of a vocal minority thing.
+ w.r.t. guys on this site – it’s dudes (and lopaw) talking about women an sex – wth you think we were going to be discussing – writing love poems and talking about Martha Stewart – as jackslash mentioned – men talk about women and sex when they are amongst each other; even if they are not SC goers - and the dancers over at stripperweb.com often talk as negative about other dancers as we do here – and btw; you sure do come across as one of those stripperweb posters
If you are in an extras-heavy club; then yeah; it would be rough to compete and you will probably be constantly asked or even expected to give extras – so better to find another club.
Then there are clubs where extras are available; but not necessarily the main thing – so all types of dancers can make $$$ in these clubs.
In most clubs I go to where extras are available – I see way more custies heading to the lap-dance room for LDs than the boom boom room – so that should be a gauge as to whether you can make it in a club where extras are available but not the main thing.
And again w.r.t. guys on this site – there are guys whom go for extras b/c there are dancers whom give extras – you can’t blame a health male for wanting sex nor getting from a willing female – takes two to tango – in fact; I’ve been turned down by dancers for dances b/c these dancers where about extras (and thus the big bucks) or nothing - not the norm – but has happened to me
Sarcasm aside, OP should know that this is a stripclub review site. The serious contributors to DB constitute a VERY small percentage of reviewers. Yet OP appears concerned about how much longer she can continue to make good money doing what she does. The real situation likely falls somewhere between outright alarm, and "don't worry" approach. While tuscl extra seekers may be in the minority, the DB contributors likely visit clubs more often (and spend more $$) than most reviewers, maybe greater than 10 times more than a lot of patrons. So, if hardcore extras seekers constitute 5% of total clubgoers, their much greater level of patronage means that OP may encounter extras seekers ~ 50% of time.
Actually, OP has (or should have) a better idea than we do of how rampant extras seekers are. Tuscler only knows what he(she) and maybe a handful of buds want. OP working 2-5 shifts per week encounters far more customers than we do, so has a larger handle on club patron tastes. (I very rarely strike up conversation with other club patrons.)
1. Playing with/touching boobs, nipples and butt.
2. Touching the outside of your vagina.
3. Finger(s) in your vagina.
4. Grinding a guy, using your butt or boobs, over his pants until he cums.
5. Rubbing a guy with your hand, from outside his pants, until he cums.
6. Reaching into his pants for a handjob until he cums.
7. Pulling his dick out for a handjob.
You've definitely gotten some good feedback already, but I’d like to add my own two cents.
A dancer and I last week were discussing lapdances when she told me that for a certain amount of money she’d get a condom from her locker for a full service dance. I admit the idea was exciting, but I passed; it’s just not what I’m looking for. A dancer who allows more isn't necessarily better. Some dancers are very mechanical in private, which can be off-putting. I like it when she gets close all over, teases, takes it slow, talks to me, and lets her hands run along my legs. And, yes, I enjoy a good lap grind as much as the next guy.
Not all dancers are every guy’s type, and not all approaches are what every guy is looking for. But from my perspective, if you make him feel wanted, allow a little touching, and are honest and consistent about your rules, you’ll attract a loyal following.