Gross Things in Lap Dances your stories

6/23/2013 6:32:32 PM

I am sure this thread is a mistake but curiosity has gotten the best of me. But i will start it off.

I got a few lapdances from a dancer who was noticeably newly tanned, didn't think much of it. Then upon standing up to leave the LD couch room i noticed tons of white specks on my black shirt highlighted by the black light. I then looked at the dancers back and noticed the white specks were from her back peeling while giving me dances. This skeeved me out like it was some 110 Lb snake shedding its skin on me.

What gross stuff has happened to you guys? Let the stories begin.

41 comments

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cky2k827

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11 years ago

Many years ago at I club I used to visit a lot I was getting a dance and when the girl stood up and bent over in front of me she her tampon string was hanging out with blood all over it.Some blood also got on my pants.I stopped after the one dance,paid and ran out.it was disgusting.I've heard that most dancers cut or tuck the string.guess she didn't get the memo

PredragDr

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11 years ago

Not exactly in the act of a literal lap dance, but the following two separate instances in the club:
- During DATY, got a piece of tissue in my mouth
- She started her period during FS. It was quite messy to say the least.

Club_Goer_Seattle

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11 years ago

I wore a light blue polo shirt once while getting several lap dances with one dancer. After the dances I went to the restroom and noticed the front of my shirt was completely covered in her make-up that rubbed off of her. It washed out okay. That's the worst that's ever happened to me. I've thought I few times I might lose a shirt button in a dancer's mesh costume, but it never happend. Nothing ever happened related to dancer hygiene.

Alucard

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11 years ago

More than once I've encountered VERY poor pussy hygiene, like rancid tuna fish!

bang69

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11 years ago

I've seen bloody tampon strings hanging down from nude dancers

boogieknight369

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11 years ago

Spitting my cum out directly onto the floor.

Alucard

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11 years ago

"Spitting my cum out directly onto the floor."

IMO that's MORE annoying than gross.

shadowcat

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11 years ago

Wanting to kiss with a mouth full of my cum. :)

Alucard

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11 years ago

^^^ Swallowing & then Locker room freshening up including oral care takes care of that. BUT with the great fear of kissing exhibited here...

ilbbaicnl

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11 years ago

Pepperoni breath, not so terrible, but very common for some reason.

Sperrz

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11 years ago

This happened in a nude club (several years ago). As part of her "routine", the dancer turned her backside towards me and then bent over forward (after having removed her thong). When her butt was right in front of my face, she farted.
Paid and left.

Papi_Chulo

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11 years ago

Iâ€™m not too finicky at all.

That I can recall the worse thing about a dancer was heavy coffee breath (guess she was trying to stay awake) and pot breath.

samsung1

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11 years ago

Akron Ohio has had a lot of skanky dances. I am not too picky when I go to Akron because the table dances are only $5/song. Hard to say no to that low of a price. Unfortunately I have run into a lot of nasty dancers and couldn't wait for the song to end. I once ended the song early and paid her the $5. She got offended and had the bouncer kick me out. Now I just tough it out and wait until the song ends.

Alucard

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11 years ago

^^^I guess you didn't run out of the club fast enough. Any bruises from the Bouncer?

crazyjoe

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11 years ago

I had a waitress at a regular resturaunt say she used to be a dancer and she took her friend out to a nude strip club for his 18 b day. She bought him a lap dance and the dancer put her head in his lap and fliped upside down with her pussy in his face. He felt some irritation in his eye right away. His eye got worse as the night went on so he went to the doctor the next day to have it checked out. He had a crab in his eye!

carmelcd

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11 years ago

All nude private dance. Dancer, with her ass in my face bends over, a bloody anus about two inches from my mouth. I pushed her away and told she was bleeding from her ass; she said, her last private had paid extra for backdoor fs.

SlickSpic

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11 years ago

My favorite pair if white linen pants had spots of blood from a dancer. I mess those slacks. Never wear white to the sc.

DandyDan

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11 years ago

I have had three bloody tampon string stories that I can tell. I believe those were all newbies. I don't know why they just don't take that time of the month off. It would seem safer than a potential accident. Then again, they probably need the money. But the worst was a dangling turd. That is one of the very few dancers I ever paid her off before the song was over.

Tiredtraveler

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11 years ago

The most recent was in the Nude room at a club the dancers are right up close and a dancer turned around pulled down her thong and her inner labia had white stuff all over it. I backed off I did not know whether it was toilet paper or something else. The other girl on stage told her about it and she then proceeded up to the mirror sat down in front of it and cleaned herself on stage.

gawker

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11 years ago

They're all human and run the range from good to bad. I was driving a stripper to a hotel and she snorted a line of coke as we were driving. She then said pops, leaned into my backseat and puked an awful brown liquid all over the floor of the car.

magicrat

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11 years ago

I think carmelcd's experience is the winner(?) here!

23cambyman

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11 years ago

These stories are hilarious! I love carmel and dandydans the best

Estafador

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11 years ago

ewwww, this thread is literally making my stomach churn. Makes me want to do strip clubs less and less (or at the very least with white girls)

ime

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11 years ago

@Estefador - dude you must just hate white girls I don't see any reference to the race of the dancers in the story. I was unaware that black or hispanic stripprrs don't have periods, do drugs, get ass fucked, and that was exclusive to white girls.

shadowcat

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11 years ago

I have to agree with ime.

Estafador

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11 years ago

what black girl gets a fucking tan? or to be less racial, what natural dark skinned chick gets a tan

Estafador

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11 years ago

if they do, they need some serious fucking help.

shadowcat

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11 years ago

Estafador - Why do black women bleach their skin?

ime

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11 years ago

That was one example, and one of the least gross things from most of the stories. I highly doubt every story was about the same girl. I don't want to insult your intelligence but i'm not sure that's possible

ime

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11 years ago

Maybe intelligence is wrong word, but you post some ignorant shit

Estafador

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11 years ago

I was only referring to the tanning thing. I've seen bitches spit my cum on the ground.

Estafador

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11 years ago

Black women bleach their skin because their sad and are accustomed to assimilation.

Papi_Chulo

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11 years ago

â€œâ€¦ He had a crab in his eye â€¦â€

This is the one that did it for me

ime

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11 years ago

I guess you can get an STD from just a LD

rattdog

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11 years ago

i kinda see where estafador is coming from. it would be a waste of time for someone real dark-skinned to go for a tan. but then again the argument could then go to: so then it would be a waste if a dark skinned girl goes to the beach on a hot sunny day?

dan: just curious-where was the turd dangling from-the g-string or from her a-hole? either way i'm guessing she rushed her deuce in the john as she was probably announced by the dj that she was next on stage.

xxxrated

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11 years ago

I remember during one lap dance stripper removed her panties and it was just a rancid smell like she was on her period. kind of spoiled the dance.

DandyDan

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11 years ago

@rattdog-
From the a-hole. I would have to think that would burn after a certain point.

SlickSpic

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11 years ago

Unless your spray on tan or bleaching cream is staining clothes or other mishaps are happening, who cares whether black chicks lighten their skin or white girls get tans. Personal freedom trumps your personal taste. As long as their freedom encroaches on yours, who cares.

dallas702

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11 years ago

Years ago a couple of women friends would often go with me to my marina. While I worked on my boat, they absorbed the sun. While I sailed, they stretched out on deck in swimsuits. I was occasionally called on to add oil to their backs.

Both women were black (actually two different shades of light brown) and both absolutely loved tanning. Anyone could tell the difference between untanned and tanned. One of them spent too much time in the sun one day and burned so bad she later peeled - that was creepy looking!

SlickSpic

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11 years ago

It's funny how black BrasileÃ±as go to the beach and layout in the sun while black Dominicanas will go to the beach but chill underneath the palapa.

Estafador

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11 years ago

It blows my load...err mind. That one.

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