Ideal Porno

For me: first of all, no story. I do get a sick enjoyment from it if the guy has to wrestle (gently) with the chick at first, but then she gets aroused and into it. Guy fondles the chick through clothes for about a minute, then they come off. Chick should have a full, hour-glass figure, firm but not muscular, and a nice face, not the ax murderer type face common among porn actresses. A couple of minutes of kissing and fondling, especially of the boobs. A minute or so each of M-on-F, F-on-M oral. A couple minutes of (male) POV cowgirl with boob fondling, and a couple minutes of POV reverse cowgirl. A couple minutes of POV missionary but with the chick's legs up and in front of the guy. Long segment of doggy-style alternating between POV and side view. At all costs, avoid showing the guy's butt hole, not even briefly. I don't like penetration close-ups. Chicks should not be shaved if they can't do it without having icky razor-burn. Long segment of anal (doggy-style, alternating POV/side view) if the chick is able to seem really into it. No you-are-under-anal-arrest arm holds. Internal cum-shot. Have to admit it looks hotter w/o condom. Continuous deep-throated grunting and groaning by the chick, with multiple, audible orgasms. Hottest female voice is very high-pitched but not squeaky. NO SPITTING, AND ESPECIALLY NO HOCKING UP, LUBE IS NOT THAT EXPENSIVE.

Wait, forget the guy, TWO hot chicks do all this with a strap on, that they trade back and forth.