The perfect place to locate a strip club?
mal_hodgson
Minnesota
If you could ignore zoning, government regulations and generally uptight attitudes about sex. Where would you pick to build a strip club? I know where I would, and if I could do it I think I'd be a rich man.
I travel alot for work, and years ago (pre 9/11), I was sitting in an airport on a long layover, watching the pretty scenery walk by (airports are great for watching chicks by the way), when it hit me that a busy airport would be the ultimate strip club location!
All the business travel would provide a steady stream of customers. Plus they are already away from home and ready for some fun. They would purposely schedule long layovers if an airport had an especially good club. What do you think? Any other ideas out there?
I travel alot for work, and years ago (pre 9/11), I was sitting in an airport on a long layover, watching the pretty scenery walk by (airports are great for watching chicks by the way), when it hit me that a busy airport would be the ultimate strip club location!
All the business travel would provide a steady stream of customers. Plus they are already away from home and ready for some fun. They would purposely schedule long layovers if an airport had an especially good club. What do you think? Any other ideas out there?
25 comments
Building 410,
Washington, DC 20223
now *that* would be a potential goldmine!
The ones I've seen by the Interstates are never busy. Although I've not seen one near an Interstate intersection. I have stopped in one once and quickly left.
Seriously, this is something I've thought a lot about. (Yes, a look into the horrifying mind of Book Guy ...) The thought first occurred to me when I parked at the Houston Galleria parking lot and, after shopping in the mall a bit, then walked around the corner to (a) The Men's Club and (b) Treasures (longer walk). I thought, "Hey, if only I walk unnoticed indoors from garage to club, it wouldn't be a walk-of-shame ..."
Ideal location is the middle of a major central-business-district parking garage. One of those giant garages that has fifteen floors of cars and six entrances and exits and takes up the bottom half of a whole city block. The kind of place that has signs on the inside that say, "Cermak Street, next left; Interstate 590, next right" next to the spiral car-exit gangways. Just take over 100 parking spaces in the middle, ventilate it well, and put in some plumbing!
You could put the club smack in the middle, and it would still use the same entrances and exits for parking as the "real" garage does. You could put the club over to one side, where it could have a side with windows, a street exit (and ventilation from exhaust fumes!), and maybe a neon sign, or you could keep it utterly secret in the center of the building.
This arrangement allows gentlemen to drop in to the club before / during / after work, nobody knows. Allows dancers pretty good security for their trip from car to club, no problems with nosey obsessed customers. (In fact, she could have it "valet" style parked for her by Bluto, who'd just have to write down the number and floor of the parking place.) Enables the customers to have an easy excuse if the wifey calls unexpectedly, he can just tell her he's re still at the building at work. If she threatens to come over and check up on him, he can run quick upstairs to his office; even if she comes over unannounced, she won't find him, but if he knows she's on the prowl, he can still sneak into the office behind her back and say he was in the office toilet.
Aids in the service industry in many ways! Dancers who do outside-the-club tricks have a ready and easily accessible set of private cubicles in which to do the nasty upstairs in the various offices; and dancers who do inside-the-club services have a better chance that a client will keep a specific appointment that he's made, so they can book their time more effectively; and dancers who actually want a "real" outside-the-club date with a customer have a way to confirm where the customer works, and can meet with and then depart from the customer without all that freakout over whether he's found out too many personal details, since the two "met" at a location that is "workplace" for BOTH of them!
I really think I'm onto something here ...
They can wander around and blow wads of cash on purses and shoes. We can sit around and blow wads and cash on strippers. win/win
And I bet we would still spend less than they do.
I personally was thinking the local shopping mall myself.