Friends with benefits?

avatar for staxwell
staxwell
Last week I was getting a nice lap dance from a hot spinner with lots of 2-way contact. A couple songs in she feels "Jr." thru my shorts and turns around with the same shocked expression(O-face) that I've received my whole life. She then pulls it out through my shorts and gives me a very dangerous genitals to genitals lap dance. I was so caught in the moment, it didn't matter that we were in the middle of the club with people walking right by us the whole time. Like an idiot I even slipped in a few times. After all was said and done she happily gave me her number and took mine.
She text me the next morning to come see her before she went to work, but I couldn't get to her in time. A few days later she calls me saying she wants me to come over again, it's her day off and her kid is at day care. Again, by the time I was free to go see her it was time for her to pick up her kid. So, I told her I'd be out of town for a week but I'll call her when I get back.
The thing is I'm not completely easy with the idea. I've gotten lucky a few times because a girl accidently brushed against "Jr.", or because a girl I hooked up with told her friends about me and they were curious. But, I've heard too many stories about guys being set up like this. I don't know her and she doesn't know me, so my cautious side is saying "this could be a set up", while my adventurous side is saying "she just wants a sex buddy who's packing".
She never said anything about money, and she keeps contacting me so, should I assume it's free and she just wants to hook-up? Or should I play it safe and not trust this situation at all?
Sorry for the long post, but I'd really appreciate others thoughts on the matter, especially those who've been here before.

29 comments

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avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
13 years ago
dang, why doesn't this ever happen to me?
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
13 years ago
I'd go with my gut feeling about the situation. If possible have her come to you, rather than going to her place. You'll know then that no one is hiding inside. And if you see someone else with her, don't let her in.
avatar for Dudester
Dudester
13 years ago
staxwell-I've been down both roads.

1) Friends with benefits-six months in, she says thatshe wants more than just a physical relationship, at which point you remind her that she wanted noemotional ties. She says "That was then, this is now."

2) Stripper who pretends that it's not about money. After the third or fourth lay, she says "I thought we had a financial understanding. You owe me $$$$$$."

You're playing with fire. Be prepared to pay upfront and if she acts nonchalant, insist on paying.
avatar for inno123
inno123
13 years ago
Oh, and next time have a raincoat for Jr. You have no idea who else she's had in there.
avatar for gsv
gsv
13 years ago
Try to meet at some public place first. You could meet her for something as simple as coffee or even lunch/dinner one day, and see where it goes from there.
avatar for Player11
Player11
13 years ago
Nothing with strippers is ever free.
avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
13 years ago
Money will become an issue. No doubt about it.
avatar for now_starring
now_starring
13 years ago
Neutral locations like hotels are great first "meeting" areas.
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
If you have ever paid this girl for any services, assume she wants money OTC. While this isn't always the case, its the safe bet.

For the record, once you've paid a dancer for anything, its going to be hard for her to let the money go.
I had a customer who really had a crush on me about two years ago. He bought dances once a week. He let me know he wanted to see me OTC and for free. Not for sex, but he wanted to take me on a real date. He wanted me to be his girlfriend. Even though I could see myself liking this guy, and always did, I liked his money more. He had already established himself as a paying customer and I couldn't dissociate him from that.
avatar for Pablo Antonio
Pablo Antonio
13 years ago
@Staxwell. You lucky sob, she wants your dick. But prepare to pay her something for the OTC.
avatar for jackslash
jackslash
13 years ago
Stiletto: "Even though I could see myself liking this guy, and always did, I liked his money more."

That says it all.
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
13 years ago
@ Stiletto, you described my fav and me to a tee.
avatar for mmdv26
mmdv26
13 years ago
25 is right. You are a paying customer, and always will be in her mind.

Dollar bills laid end-to-end forms the umbilical cord that will allow you to connect with her.

avatar for steve229
steve229
13 years ago
What kind of benefits is she looking for? Health, Dental, 401K?
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
13 years ago
25,

Beside my ATF, you may be the most level headed, common sensed, and realist dancer I've had the pleasure of knowing, albeit only through this medium.
avatar for Club_Goer_Seattle
Club_Goer_Seattle
13 years ago
@ Clubber: I mentioned on another thread that I consider Stiletto25 to be the "Dear Abby" of TUSCL. She has very thoughtful, insightful, and compassionate advice to offer.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
13 years ago
Now if only Stiletto25, "Dear Abby" would at least let us know where she works :)
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
13 years ago
Now if only Stiletto25, "Dear Abby" would at least let us know where she works :)
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
13 years ago
Now if only Stiletto25, "Dear Abby" would at least let us know where she works :)
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
13 years ago
Now if only Stiletto25, "Dear Abby" would at least let us know where she works :)
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
13 years ago
Dozed off again, eh, vince.
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
13 years ago
^ LOL.
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
@club_goer- Thanks!

@clubber- Thanks to you also. I've worked hard to stay level headed. The pull to the other side, though, is strong.
avatar for Stiletto25
Stiletto25
13 years ago
@vincemichaels- I have a typical female issue. I'm afraid if you see me naked, my words won't mean anything anymore. That's one of the reasons I haven't put up the boob pics. Although as time goes on I'm reevaluating my position.
avatar for GoVikings
GoVikings
13 years ago
^ Do it, Stiletto, doooooooo ittttttt! :)
avatar for 10inches
10inches
13 years ago
had a stripper tell men once that she was a "size queen". this was after a lap dance which validated my nickname. she pulled it out to make sure that I was packing what she thought she felt, then offered to meet me after work for a freebie.
avatar for vincemichaels
vincemichaels
13 years ago
ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ, damn, why am I so tired. Oh wait, it was that Asian babe last night at Brad's Brass Flamingo in Indianapolis. LOL
avatar for staxwell
staxwell
13 years ago
Good stuff. I appreciate all the insight. I'll take the advice and get a room and have her meet me there, and I'll have some money ready jusy in case.
@govikings, it's probably because you're a vikings fan.lol
@steve229, I hear a healthy sex life is good for your physical health...so to speak.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
13 years ago
vm,

Once again...

ASSHOLE!!! :)

25,

You hang in there and do what YOU want! Don't worry about us pervs!
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