The Disconnect Between Our Real Lives And Our SC Hobby
My winter vacation and the accompanying divorce from my North American SC hobby has had me musing on this subject. In my real life before retirement (but soon to be resumed) I was a player in the Western Canadian oil patch. I did not discover SCs until I was 61 years old! Talk about lost opportunities!
I don't have a clue how I came to this wonderful fantasyland. It was pure happenstance. I do not have to keep my hobby hidden from my straight life as many of you other hobbyists must do.
But, how did I get here?
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the oil patch farmerart?
Anybody have any answers?
I don't have a clue how I came to this wonderful fantasyland. It was pure happenstance. I do not have to keep my hobby hidden from my straight life as many of you other hobbyists must do.
But, how did I get here?
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the oil patch farmerart?
Anybody have any answers?
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41 comments
BECAUSE IT FELT GOOD ALONG THE WAY - IT IS INDEED A FANTASYLAND.
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
BECAUSE IT FEELS GOOD AND IT'S FAIRLY MINDLESS.
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
IT'S A SPORT. HUNTING WITHOUT THE COST OF GUNS, SHELLS, TACKLE, BOATS, RESTRICTIVE CLOTHING,ETC. LICENSE/PERMIT CAN BE COSTLY.
Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the oil patch farmerart?
SELF-INFLICTED THERAPY. YOU TRY TO BE A NICE GUY AT THE CLUB WITH THE CHICKIES TO MAKE UP FOR THE FACT THAT YOU'RE AN A**HOLE AT WORK. I GUESS THAT WORKS THE OTHER WAY, TOO.
No idea.
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
Variety.
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
Stupidity.
Why is the SC Clubber such a different man than the bank Clubber?
I'm not.
I lifetime desire to oogle pretty, naked girls.
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
See above.
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
I spend what I have to spend, just like others do on any hobby. I'm not depriving anyone of anything by doing so.
Why is the SC me such a different man than the work me?
Not really true. The SC me is just a more relaxed, fun version of the buttoned-down me.
Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...Same as it ever was...
Hasn't anyone else here ever had the gals over post shift for some tea and biscuits???
But that only accounts for part of it. It also satisfies a visual/tactle tendency to appreciate cute ass--in person. We can watch porn videos or buy magazines, but there's nothing like sitting next to a hot girl who's there to flirt with you (if she does her job right).
And it's excitement to balance normality. No stress when we want to escape stress.
And, significantly, it's "the hunt" for a good match up.
mmdv26--I thought you said it pretty well, too.
* How did I get here? - I was a married 23 year old graduate student who'd never been to an SC. A fellow lab-mate experienced in the SC fine arts talked me in to going one night, although I had concerns based on how I was raised, my school at the time, my wife, etc. But go I did, and I remember the girls like it was yesterday. I have seldom in my life enjoyed something so thoroughly and immediately as I did that evening. Of course, that experience opened a can of worms with my wife (now ex) at home and every girlfriend since, and who knows to what extent my desire to indulge keeps me single even now, some 25 years later.
* Why do I like our peculiar little world so much? - It's mostly biological. Male homo sapiens are so hard-wired to enjoy sexual stimulation that studies show we (and most higher-level mammals) will go through nearly any obstacle/deprivation to get it.
* How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms? - I'd argue with "frivolities" as the descriptor, although it'd be a cool name for a club. The fact is, the part of our brain that controls sexual desire wants what it wants, and it wants it now! It wants sex EVERY day, at least easy sex and preferably with different attractive partners. This part of our brain doesn't care about presumably higher-order aims, and will fight with other cognitive centers for expression and recognition. It will NOT be denied, so there's nothing 'frivolous' about satiating it. In evolutionary terms, it is THE ONE THING that ensures our species survival and so it's not a wonder it's front and center in our lives.
* Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the oil patch farmerart? - Our brain is not single-focus, homogeneous machine. It's more like the European Union - composed of rather disparate entities, evolved from different roots and for different purposes, loosely bound by a higher-order governing structure that itself is flawed and inefficient. The part of our brain that regulates sexual desire don't give a shit about our business dealings. As such, this part can enable you to be a rather slick and suave SC aficionado over lunch, and then another part (or parts) of your brain take over to conduct a business deal with aplomb in the afternoon. Then you can go home and another part guides you to enjoy cultivating little plants in your garden before another part settles in to relish the latest psychological thriller.
These are all different parts of your brain getting their respective time for expression, which means you're simply being "you," in all these relative circumstances. This doesn't mean your overriding constants won't be there - higher integrative cortical functions to some degree govern and modulate expression of all these functions (e.g., if you're honest (an integrative cortical function) in your business dealings, then you'll likely be honest in your SC endeavors).
So, we as humans really are a patchwork of conflicting drives that on the surface, any one of which may seem overly important or frivolous, depending on the cultural context, but their expression never goes away. So, as to why you choose to spend your money on SCs, frivolous or not, the part of your brain that drives you in this arena finds the exchange of your cash for her attention worth it.
Anyway, to address, if not answer, your questions:
> But, how did I get here?
Don't know how you got there, but I'm been doing substantially what I'm doing now, if not always so commonly, for a little over 30 years, when I found my girlfriend fucking somebody else. Some periods of my life have featured more clubbing than others, and there was a period right after getting married that I didn't go at all.
> Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
I suspect it's the same as the rest of us. There's more naked women there than in the not so peculiar big world.
> How can I spend so much money on frivolities with
> few conscience qualms?
It's your money, why shouldn't you spend it on what you want? And "'cause the law says so" isn't a particularly illuminating response, as it doesn't answer why you *do*, but why you refrain.
> Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the
> oil patch farmerart?
As rod so eloquently pointed out, the notion that a person is a single unified personality is a fallacious one. Different people see us as different, and we present different faces to different people. My wife positively hates the person I am when I'm at work, and the folks at work think she's a saint for her ability to put up with me. My friends outside of work have no notion of my life in strip clubs, and the dancers that I interact with on a weekly basis see yet a different person. They're all elements of my personality, but different facets come to the fore when I'm in different situations.
Like me, you buried yourself in your career. You were very good at it and that provided all the emotional nutrition that you needed-then, one day, you walked into a SC.
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
In the oil patch you were unchallenged. You were the king. You understood the rules and mastered them. Now you find yourself in a challenge where the rules change every five minutes, and you love it.
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
It's like this-there's no narcotic as powerful as the applause of an audience, which is so many musicians, actors, and even strippers do what they do. Art too has found a narcotic that he likes to mainline-estrogen.
Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the oil patch farmerart?
Because oil patch art had to be responsible. SC art doesn't have any responsibility.
My answer is simple. For my whole life I've been serious, hard-working and responsible. Now I'm an old dude and I would like to have some fun for a change. The strip club gives me the chance to stare at attractive young women, talk with them, drink with them, and party with them. The girls rub their naked bodies against me and make me forget my problems. I wish I had spent time with girls like this when I was younger.
"How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?"
The time I spend in strip clubs or outside the club with dancers is the best time of my week. I waste a ton of money, but I enjoy myself. And I feel satisfaction in helping young women, many of them single mothers, make a decent living.
Good luck!
The only thing I'll add is that you should be glad that you didn't discover our little "hobby" til you were 61.
Think of all the money you probably have saved!
art, don't try to analyze it. if you're enjoying it and not getting hurt by it, just do it ;)
Indeed, why should rick going to a strip club and getting BBBJs and BBFS and putting his wife at risk of STDs be an an issue for his conscience? I mean it's only his wife. And his narcissism surely takes priority over his wife. Let's get real.
Anyway, according to Rick, there are much worse problems in the world than people putting there wives at risk of STDs. The biggest problem, is people not posting enough reviews for strangers on strip club websites. Now if there was one cause in the world that really mattered that should be it. Forget friggin' world hunger or that Libya stuff...
You may use my copyrighted "Yawn" whenever you wish.
HOT WOMEN (We're biologically drawn to them...in most cases)
Why do I like our peculiar little world so much?
HOT WOMEN (who will git nekkid and rub themselves on our happy bits)
How can I spend so much money on frivolities with few conscience qualms?
HOT WOMEN (The skew our conscience so that it all make sense at the time)
Why is the SC farmerart such a different man than the oil patch farmerart?
HOT WOMEN (You probably didn't have a bunch of hot naked women around when you were drillin)
Anybody have any answers?
HOT WOMEN (This is always the answer...but seriously, you're asking us?! Youve been in Europe too long!)
Dougster, criticize what you think you know all you want - I know that it's a compulsion and that you simply can't help yourself. Rest assured that I won't hold it against you and that you'll still always be my favorite little bitch. :) No need to thank me, it is my pleasure to provide you with the material you jerk off to and live the life that you cannot. ;)
farmer, it's all in good fun. I say live - you nevr know when the day will come that you cannot do this any more.
"Hello Kettle? This is Pot. You're still black."
You are also welcome to use my "Yawn".
Sorry Doug-bitch, I was going to respond to that last night but I had my face buried in the pussy of a brand new stripper friend. In fact, I liked her so much that I'm going to introduce her to another local stripper friend this weekend and make it a party ;)
What were YOU doing last night? Oh, that's right, spouting nonsense on here about what you think you know. :)
Anyway, I'll keep feeding more juicy tidbits for you to think about as you fill your jizz towel in your basement bedroom. No extra charge.
And since you go for the bareback types, I wonder how many other customers' jizz you ended up eating that night. Very strange the things you brag about, rick.
You better keep your last brain cell for yourself, george. It's far too easy owning you on here already! ;-)