My Top Three Annoying Stripper Types

The one who will not take a hint and just go away. Typically fugly too.

@joesparty- i hate those too. i had to tell this one fat black girl to come back three times before she left. ugh!

@sucker4ladies- the only type of the three you listed that i hate was the air dancer. never encountered the pain girl.

what joesparty said:
hate when the same 'fugly' keeps coming back and back, no means no !! ...
main reason is the other girls see you keep rejecting, so the nice one you really want won't come over and i like them to come over and chat so i can suss it out, before i spend money getting a dance.

other two types would be. the really gorgeous ones who just put no effort in whatsoever, you want em' but they just do rubbish dances or will not approach you for any sort of chat. or the ones come and ask when i am obviously trying to enjoy watching a paticular fave on stage and just get totally in the way !!

best three later sounds good.

I've encountered the pain one. Out of nowhere, lifts up my shirt and bites down HARD on my nipple. It took everything in me to not make a noise of pain

The most annoying stripper type is the one who won't do extras.

Number 1 isn't so bad when you get to know her. The first few times, nah, silence is golden. The other two I can do without. I really dislike pushy dancers and especially ones that are on you the minute you walk into the door even though you're trying like shit not to walk into something since you eyes haven't adjusted from the sun to the dark, mirrored environment filled with smoke and dry ice vapor. Woman, just let me sit down for a few minutes.

1) the lying, thieving whore. Well, not the whore part.
2) the fugly who won't take a hint and makes me be rude.
3) the air dancer doesn't bother me a heck of a lot. They're generally easily detectable, even if they do straight up lie about it, and I do make a mistake, I'll know it after the only dance starts.

1. ROB's
2.stuck up
3.fat & ugly
4.smell like thay haven't showered in weeks

all the above are anoying... but the pain girls are the worst

Agree with the above written. Sometimes the pain dancer might not even know it. Maybe she's thinking if she tweaks & twists the nipples it should feel good to me her too!? But I've had several dancers say that some other customer tweaks, pinches, pulls &/or bites etc. and that's something always heard as a complaint. Have also had dancer bruise my shoulder or arm when she's balancing herself (I guess), and there have been several times that I had some concern that my magic wand might be broken when the dancer bounced down a little aggresssively. Who knows?

Speaking of the pain type:

I don't know if this is a regional redneck thing or not, but some local girls think it's great fun to slam there ass into your gut/groin/umbilical hernia as hard as they can when you're at the tip rail. I've learned to keep a little distance until I see how X is going to behave. I have come very close to slapping the shit out of an ass after actually nearly having the wind knocked out of me. I'm sure my ass would have been in the street asap, but it really pisses me off. We also have a whole of lot self 'mutilation' locally where it's supposed to be a turn on to have some chick slap the shit out of her own ass. I little is o.k., but it does nothing for me.

1. You wanna dance- these girls go to every customer in the club and spits out that line. Only the poor sappy guys would take that offer.
2. Can't take a hint- when I say the first and second time, why do you keeping on coming back.
3. Unattractive girls- self explanatory!!!

For everyone who is talking about fugly girls, I'm offended! No I'm totally kidding:)

The thing about heavy, unattractive girls is they are annoying but fail to believe that about themselves. I've seen some yucky ones walk the floor like they are all that and a bag of chips. They keep getting rejected, customers move away from the stage when they come on, they still don't get it, and then they get pissed. So the next time you see a girl who should not be in a g string, remember, she thinks she's gods gift and you have the problem, not her. It may be true confidence, it may be a facade, I don't know. When you are not making money though, its time to get a clue.

@Stiletto:Can we just cut to the chase here:will you marry me (I'm on bended knee holding a little black box that's VERY heavy as I type this) :)

stiletto: totally agree... some just need to accept reality

@ johnbuford- :)

@stiletto: There *are* guys who prefer those big girls, and are no doubt feeding the notion that she's "all that and a bag of chips." I've seen them, and while I completely fail to comprehend the attraction, I am happy they exist, if only so I can point to them when the big girls come my way and say "he looks lonely."

Seriously, if I wanted to see pale, blubbery, flabby flesh, I'd go home and look in the mirror.

My favorite dancer to say no to is the really fine...a perfect 10 in a lot of guys opinion. Why? Perfect 10's usually give the worst dances. If she is am unknown, I usually put her under more scrutiny. In all aspects of her life usually she has never had to work hard.

Everyone has their own favorites (and least favorites, too) but here are some of my observations:

Perfect 10 (mentioned by BigYogi) It depends on what a guy considers a "perfect 10" but there are definitely some dancers who LOOK good, who couldn't give a good lap dance, even if they tried - and some of them don't even try.

Stinky and/or fugly. I haven't run into many of these, thankfully. Tell them 'no' enough times, and they will move along and seek out the next target.

BIG. Some women are big and beautiful. Others are NOT. Probably three of my best ten LDs have been given by women who were "plus-sized." I don't seek them out, necessarily, but it seems that some of them do work harder. I also have had a great LD from a 90-pound girl, so maybe I could say that "size doesn't matter." On the other hand, the worst LD I ever had was from a big girl, which also brings us to "pain." She just bounced up and down on my lap - "cowgirl" could be great if she were sliding up and down on my "big Johnson" but not when I am sitting on a couch with my clothes on. Ouch! Thankfully, this has only happened once. Haven't encountered the biting type, and hope I never do.

Talkative. The successful dancers know that they need to satisfy the customer (just like successful people in any other business.) They may talk to you, but don't get into all their personal problems. I don't mind a little talk, but really don't want to hear about her financial troubles and how her boyfriend (drummer for a band I've never heard of) doesn't appreciate what she do for him - including putting a roof over his head. Okay, so he's a jerk, but why do you think I have the answer to this problem?

Air Dancer. Air dances seem to happen routinely at certain clubs. Maybe it's club policy, I don't know. There are some clubs where I will go and watch the action on stage, but won't go for the private dances, because I know what I will get - just what I saw on stage, but at 20x the price.

I have a college buddy that is always looking at things different:
1. An ugly Fat chick walks by that we all make fun of, He says "That girl is some guys favorite piece of ass"

2. A hot girl walks by that we are all drooling over, He says "No matter how good looking a girl is, somebody, somewhere is tired of fucking her"

The one that won't go away. I had a very skinny, mouthy, young black girl latch on to me as I walked in the door and would not leave. Very skinny, mouthy, and young are not my thing. She looked like an 8 year old. I tried to be nice and say I just arrived and was going to watch the stage for a while. When she did not leave I went to the tip rail and sat down even though the girl on stage was not appealing and she followed. All the while asking every 2 minute for a private and how I would not be disappointed! I finally told her I was not interested in a dance from her as she was not my type and she still did not leave so I finally said "I will give you $10 to go the F..! away and leave me the F..! alone" She finally took the money and left then proceeded to bad mouth me to the other girls. I found this out as later a very nice looking late 20 something girl came over and told me she figured I might like some company as anyone who did not like that girl must be OK. She asked me what I did to get rid of her, I told her and she laughed. She told me usually the girl gets someone into the back then won't let them go back out front and over charges them for air dances and the only way a patron gets away is to leave. She told me that the girls was telling the girls to not bother with me as I was gay. I know that does not make sense because why would I be in a strip club that has women.

Bad hygiene!!! I can live with a slight perspiration smell but not swimming in cheap cologne. That is usually to cover other smells. I was in a club in Houston and the stage was seperated from the seating and you walked up to tip. I went up to tip the 7 that was on stage after I tipped her she turned around and took off her bottoms and spead her legs and the stench from her crotch hit me from 4 feet away and I had to leave. A girl took a load in the private area then goes immediately out onto the floor at least go let it drain out don't go sit on some unsuspecting patron and drain on his pant leg. Happened to a friend of mine and his pants reeked and he was married (he never got a lap dance). We had to go to my hotel (I was in town on business when we went clubbing)to rinsed them before he went home.

The other bad ones are girls of any size that just bounce up and down HARD on your lap. I guess they think that feels good. Yeh I just love have my nuts crushed and bladder beat up NOT!. WTF

Don't forget the aggressive ones that have so many piercings that you are afraid being skewered and getting tetnus

No complaints about the above comments. All were spot on.

Once at Sirens I had a pretty, Light skinned, multiracial (black/Asian) girl sneak up behind me and solicit a dance. I only saw her face, hair and boobs spilling out of her too small bikini top.

I agreed to a VIP dance and walked back. I then noticed she was plus sized, which is normally okay. When doing the dance she got me hard, then proceeded to slam her fat ass on my cock and nearly break it. I broke away after the second song by saying I was out of money and gave her a small tip. She then proceeded to pinch and twist my nipples while saying, "don't you have some credit cards or ATM cards or something?!"

I said, "yes I do, but I was tryin to be polite!". She smacked her lips and huffed off to pay the club their portion. I made a B line for a manager, and told him, but he didn't care. I haven't been back in almost a year.

I've got a couple more:

- Bad breath, whether from excessive smoking or some combo of strange foods. Major turnoff.
- Glitter queen, You're still finding the damn stuff in your clothes or your hair days later.

The girls latching on to customers the minute they walk through the door are the most annoying and difficult to work with in my opinion.

Since I work at a small club, we don't get the numbers that the larger ones do, so every customer counts! We have a couple of dancers who are so aggressive they will camp on laps and block the view of the others on stage. Guys will buy dances to avoid confrontation because those girls get angry.

The problem is they never find out that there're some subtle and very skilled delivery girls at my club because they get claimed as "My Customer".

It's one thing if the patron looks around and says "I want her". At least I've had the opportunity to present my case. But, it's irritating to not be seen because someone has pasted herself all over him.

I only have two pet peeves: 1) The dancer who latches onto you the minute you walk in the club. They're never worth spendinga second with, but usually hard to get rid of and 2) When a dancer asks you for a dance and you say "no thank you" and they "demand" an explanation why. I used to try to explain nicely, but it never worked. Now I just say "because". Parents use that on children all the time so why not.

My least favorite types of dancers are The ones who want to sit in the dressing room all night long. This type of girl is a club operators nightmare.

My most annoying is the STINKY SNATCH stripper. The dancer is usually very nice. But when you get to the lap dance in the back room and they get close the INTENSE SMELLY STINK from their crotch will BURN your nose hairs off! It's shocking!!! and they always want to talk too. This will ruin your night in a hurry!

the ones that stink, the ones that upsell dances but its all air, the ones that dont do extras

the ones I like the least are the dancers that cluster in the corner and ignore customers. how do they make any money just sitting with their girlfriends?

number 2 is the the VIP tease. will promise a "special treat" then produce nothing.

I've encountered this one girl that is fat/ugly and when I said no to her Lapdance request, she got offended and said that I am stupid to say no to her fine body. wtf??!!

The ones who refuse to take "No' for an answer. Then every once in awhile you'll come across a bitchy stripper who accuses you of being gay for turning her down. But the worst are the ones that ask "Why?", "Don't you like me?", or "Which part of me don't you like?"

Wow...You guys have some strip club war stories.Lol.I will be honest,at least for me,you all are paying to much attention to the dancers.I usually buy the bartender,the bouncers,and even the owner/manager drinks.Not only does this grease the wheels,they usually fend off "predator" dancers for you and let you know who provide extras.But thats just me.

Speaking of the pain ladies,I've had experiences of two types: First, a very sexy Jamaican catches me on the main floor and commences with the stripper handshake and x amount of dirty talk. I take her back for the club's 5 song VIP special and find out she's the bouncing type. I love hard contact if were fucking and naked, but fully dressed this is just Blunt Force Trauma. Next day I still had blood in my urine!
The other story was with a bony little redhead that had legs and knees similar in size to most peoples' arms and elbows. She felt like putting her titties in my face by kneeling on my thighs. The pain inflicted on my legs by those tiny kneecaps reminded me of the great time I had years earlier with Miss Jamaica back at the other club. I think my pain experiences are different than some others because my tormentors seemed to be completely unaware of the damage they were doing.