How to be a less pathetic PL

28 comments

• CTQWERTY

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  14 years ago

  Why, I'm insulted by the title! ;) From the other side, what is a guy to do when a gal he ordered a dance from, now strattling across his lap, awaits his approval when she flashes her mildly flawed (straight upper lip) smile and knows that you noticed? All I did was order a dance...
• SometimeVoyager

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  14 years ago

  Personally I think it's unbelievable that any guy would actually consider having a serious relationship with a stripper. I mean come on fellas, on the societal scale a stripper rates somewhere between a truck stop waitress and a street ho, each of which serves a purpose but would you really want to take one home? REALLY!? Think about the life you would have at home. You'd be working your ass off to support yourself, the little woman, and her drug dealer (or tattoo artist or psychic or whatever). She wouldn't be able to hold down a job because, despite blowing the boss, she'd get fired for showing up for work late (if at all), drunk, stealing money from the register, short-changing the customers, and spending her entire shift talking and texting on her phone. She'd party til four, sleep til two, and expect you to do the cooking, cleaning and laundry. Then you'll actually be relieved when she leaves you for some parolee. THESE are the women who call US pathetic losers. Stick to the program - pay as you go, flavor of the day, then move on.
• Dudester

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  14 years ago

  <p>bmoreshowgirl-a lot of dancers feel that every guy in a SC is a pathetic loser. Many of those who feel that way have made a series of bad life decisions. Sometimes, a dancer will loosen up and be a sexual being. </p> <p>The last dancr I was with, was a sexual person. She allowed me to take her to her happy place. This is the kind of stripper that I end up caring about. My first ATF and I had a good thing going on for two years, then she suddenly took a powder. </p> <p>Generalizing is a bad thing. A number of black people are criminals, but does that make them all criminals ? In ethnic groups, fewer than four in ten hispanics finish high school. Does this mean that all hispanics are stupid ? White women are the most difficult to have sex with. Does this mean that all white women are stuck up frigid bitches ? </p> <p>I understand your frustration with the guy that feels that you "rent out" for 20 bucks an hour. I make twenty bucks an hour and I have to work twenty hours to acomplish what I want/need in a club, provided all my bills are paid and there's food in the fridge/pantry. You make twenty bucks about every three minutes. If I'm going to give you twenty bucks for three minutes work, I want bang for my buck. </p> <p>I haven't met you. I don't know your personality. I don't know your lapdance style. I do know, however, that Baltimore clubs and dancers charge dearly, and give a lot less bang for buck than Houston clubs/dancers. </p>
• bmoreshowgirl

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  14 years ago

  Hey, I never meant to insult/offend anyone with this. The point I was attempting to make (however unsuccessfully) is the fact that it's irritating to have someone obsess over you simply for doing your job...simply because you're a stripper. I'd much rather have someone be interested in me based upon who I am in my "real life". The strip club is a place in which the dancer provides a service and the guest receives said service (whatever that may be...I'm not one to judge in that respect). My post was aimed at those who can't seem to grasp that concept. I can't really explain better than that right now as 14 hours of work have left me rather inebriated. My apologies to all offended parties.
• Dazymaz

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  14 years ago

  wow that was kind of harsh chickie . have some respect for the harder eared dollars customers are spending on you .. If a customer likes you or even loves you you should be flattered .. it is a compliment to your hunting skills . dont bite the hand that feeds you .
• steve229

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  14 years ago

  "I was recently involved in a situation in which a guest decided he wanted to be my "sugar daddy". To him, this meant coming in, monopolizing my time for at least an hour, spending a total of $20, and then leaving." <p> Sounds more like a "Nutrasweet Daddy", lol.
• CTQWERTY

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  14 years ago

  Nice one, Steve!
• txtittyfan

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  14 years ago

  Some guys just don't get the point.
• uscue13

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  14 years ago

  My problem is quite the opposite, girls you get a dance from and then everytime you come in the club after that they think they're the only person you should hang out with, monopolize my time by sitting on my lap for songs on end despite me making it known I'm not getting a dance from her, and acting upset if I tip or get a dance from another girl. Should we call those PS (pathetic strippers)? I understand wanting to lock down a regular, but don't you need to walk the floor and meet new people instead of sitting down and making me uncomfortable for 30 minutes because I don't want a dance with you?
• bmoreshowgirl

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  14 years ago

  I completely agree with the "pathetic stripper" comment. It's pretty easy to tell if a guy doesn't want a dance with you. That's when, in theory, you should get up and move on. I spend a lot of time commuting to and from work every day and sometimes have to pull doubles. It's true that making $20 an hour is pretty damn good, however, if you're at work for a seven hour shift and you make $20 in one hour and then there's a lull in the amount of guests in the club, the amount being made isn't consistent. It can flat out suck working for tips sometimes. In an ideal situation, I could be making upwards of a grand each shift, but that rarely happens with the economy how it is...so my best bet is to maximize my dance count with people who actually want them instead of sitting with someone who just wants to "keep me from everyone else". It just makes sense. On a side note, my "stripper shit" does not involve kids, a deadbeat boyfriend, or a drug habit. I don't spend my money on frivolous things because, let's be real, I don't really feel like being a stripper forever...despite how much I enjoy my job. I've got a lot of student loans to pay from my bachelors degree and a savings account that needs a little extra padding. Honestly, I didn't mean to offend anyone with the post, but it appears I did anyway. Sorry y'all.
• farmerart

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  14 years ago

  You didn't offend me. I am an adult with bucks to spend in SCs. I fully recognize the fantasy aspect to the whole business. I like as much mileage as my bucks can buy. I don't want to know the "real" you. The one time I became infatuated with a stripper turned out rather messy. So where are you working when I return to North America in March?
• CTQWERTY

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  14 years ago

  At least student loans aren't credit cards.
• steve229

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  14 years ago

  FYI. Average U.S. Hourly Wage - $20.90 (2009) [view link]
• MisterGuy

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  14 years ago

  <p>"In ethnic groups, fewer than four in ten hispanics finish high school. Does this mean that all hispanics are stupid ?"</p> <p>No, it means that, as per usual, *you're* stupid Dudster. The current Hispanic high school dropout rate is only around 18%.</p>
• Dougster

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  14 years ago

  Gee, life is sure tough for you poor, pathetic whores isn't it? Honestly, none of us give a shit. Your whining about it here is as pathetic as your customers. Or couldn't you figure that one out on your own? Now get off this board, back in the club, on your knees and do some BBBJs for us for $50 or whatever it is you charge!
• bmoreshowgirl

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  14 years ago

  Haha, dougster. Nice one. I have to give you credit... But, if it weren't for us poor, pathetic whores, where would you go to get a BBBJ? Honest question.
• Dougster

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  14 years ago

  Honestly? From your mother. Oh wait, she's a pathetic whore too, isn't she? Hmmm...
• georgmicrodong

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  14 years ago

  "To him, this meant coming in, monopolizing my time for at least an hour, spending a total of $20, and then leaving." Yeah, those people bug me too. *I* am the only one who should monopolize your time. :)
• bumrubber

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  14 years ago

  For me, the fact that the whole SC experience is fleeting and temporary is what makes it so much fun. You can flirt and tease and be teased and touch and grope without implications. I find that the more "in the moment" I can be without getting personal, the more the girls loosen up and the more fun we all have. That itself is a social skill worth cultivating and a SC is a great place to do it. All that said, over the years I've dated 3 strippers now and I think a lot of it had to do with being able to be "light."
• samsung1

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  14 years ago

  It sounds to me if he was getting to have 1 hour of your time and only paying $20, you were the PL not him. Getting the attention of a stripper for 1 hour for only spending $20 is a discount and a good deal.
• Player11

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  14 years ago

  Strippers sell a fantasy expereince. They are not going to be your GF, but this does not mean you can't have fun with them. In many ways they are a lot more fun than a "regular" GF.
• kingcripple

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  14 years ago

  bmoreshowgirl- so much name calling. not by just you but by the guys posting in here as well. at least you have the common sense to apologize. for me, dating a stripper is a fantasy in that i would love to walk in the club my girlfriend would be working at and look to the guy next me while she is on stage and say, "see that? i get to see that whenever i want". its an ego booster. not that its ever happened or will ever happen, but its fun to think about. other than that, i don't see what the big deal is. if only it were to really happen. on the other hand i only want what i cannot have and when/if it happens i don't want it anymore.
• Player11

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  14 years ago

  I believe many strippers are hesitant to date a customer bc he knows she is a sex worker. It has nothing to do with him being a loser bc he goes to Strip Clubs. Considering many of the loser, cuckhold dancer BF or husbands I have known or known about, believe me this crowd had nothing to hold above the strip club customer LOL. I fing the term PL similar to the term RIL. Dancers sell a fantasy or in many case extras. They are sexworkers. It is easy for a newbie to get manipulated by SS or get confused the dancer is really interested in dating him in the traditional sense. The one I have been seeing 2.5 yr otc has become my whore. I hope to enjoy her as long as it lasts. I can understand where bmoresshowgirl is coming from - she sounds like she would be a good girl who could give a decent spender some nice dances. Can't blame her for not wanting broke people wasting her time.
• TampaFunGuy

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  14 years ago

  Quick note: Let me just break this down to something simple. Strip club customers can be broken down into two types: College age go out and drink and see naked girls. And the middle age guy out for a cheap feel and maybe an extra. One has to face that guys who go to strip clubs on a regular basis are not well though of and are considered basic loosers in the real world by our freinds, relatives and general public. Face the facts, if you can't just go to club, have a good time, and move on. Then you need some help! Basically dancers do not find the loves of their life at the club. (they can't afford to mess up thier income.) All the strippers I dated, it happened the first night and I was banded from coming to the club again. (NOTE KEY - Don't ask whats on the menu!)
• skibum609

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  14 years ago

  The flip side of this is when you spend a few bucks and the stripper begins to believe that as "her customer" she enjoys a special status in your life. The toughest part of being a customer is when you're nice to a stripper, spend some money on her and then cannot get rid of her. The minute you walk in...there they are. Tough to return them to occassional groping candidate once they latch on to you, so its best to just move on. One question I have is how on earth does anyone find an hour's worth of conversation with a stripper?
• baltimoretraveler

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  14 years ago

  Interesting discussion and lots of good comments. Bmoreshowgirl mentioned that some guy took up almost an hour of her time, spent $20 and then left. Now I don’t know what club she works in on the Block, but I’ve never seen any bartender let a dancer sit on a drink for more than a max of 15 minutes, lol! What I also don’t understand is why she would continue to sit with the same dude for a whole week if he consistently wasn’t spending lots of $? Nobody forces any dancer to sit with someone. Skibum609- I completely agree that most strippers are quick to claim a guy as, “their regular”, if you have visited their club and bought them a drink or had a lap dance more than once. And it does make for an uncomfortable situation sometimes considering that on any given trip to the club, you could see another dancer that catches your eye and with whom you would rather spend some time. Occasionally I’ll mention to a dancer if she starts to expect that I’ll buy her a drink/have a lap dance every time I see her that this is all entertainment and I don’t care who she sits with and nor should she expect that I’ll be buying drinks or dances with her every time I’m in the club.
• journey87

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  13 years ago

  My biggest pet peeve...is when customers want free things such as lap dances or to as stated monopolize your time...let me ask this... when you go to the grocery store, the item you have, wasn't free correct? The oil change you received on your truck, not free correct? Or how about a Dr visit or meeting with a lawyer, you pay for their time correct? So why is it, when your WORKING(No min. Hrly wage,no benefits etc) and a customer expects you to sit with him for free? Just curious....
• Leonard313

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  13 years ago

  I'll just start by saying I agree with the OP on this one. Guys really do need to realize that they are simply a dollar sign to the vast, vast majority of strippers they encounter. It is VERY pathetic to hear guys talk as though a stripper "likes" them or what not. BUT...let me just tell you that even though not EVERY stripper is mentally screwed up or from a bad home...I'm sure the strippers in here would admit that it's a fairly common backstory. In a SIMILAR way, strippers need to realize that many of the men that frequent their clubs have some psychological issues. Sure, there is the bachelor party crowd, the young a-hole crowd, and the traveling salesmen kind...but many of the guys I see in a club are guys that either are trapped in a marriage that isn't satisfying them sexually or they are guys that are so desperate for female acceptance that they would hand over their salary every week just to feel "one girl" wants them. I'm a Sex and Love addict. The sex addict part of me is drawn to you beauty and seduction. That's what gets me in the door and makes me so "in a haze" that I'll stay there for 6-8 hours getting drunk...completely drawn to just about every dancer on the stage...and almost unable to turn down dances or extras...even though I "should". The Love addict part of me, is the part that is constantly trying to convince me that the experience is more than just a "financial transaction". It's the part of me that wants that phone number or e-mail address...so the experience is more than just "prostitution". And it's the part of me that fantasizes about what a great "love" I could have with this young beauty if I could just afford to provide her every need. Again, I'm not disagreeing with the OP, in fact I am COMPLETELY agreeing with her but trying to let her know that what they are experiencing is probably a very hurt and fragile individual...as "pathetic" as that is. And just to point this out, you can't have your cake and eat it too. You can't tell guys they are hot (lie to them), have your regulars, and get your "gifts" (jewelry, etc...)...but then turn around and tell the guy he's pathetic. If you want to stop the confusion and "pathetics"...just walk on stage with a sign that says exactly what you'll do for what price. No "seduction", no "eye contact". And before every private dance or lap dance, tell the guy that you are just doing it for the money and that you find him and the other guys that frequent strip clubs to be "pathetic losers" who you would NEVER have a relationship with in real life. It's HONEST...but how successful do you think you'd be with that type of sales pitch???