review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
I didn’t realize there was one, but it looks like I just found a unironically pro-Deja Vu fanboy. I was going to write a comment dunking on this guy, but then I realized his response to my Vu takedown described me perfectly. I engage in “profanity-laced self promotion”? Damn fucking right I do.
review comment
2 years ago
Good review. Solid intel. The experience is written about creatively and is engaging. Like I mentioned in my last review, I was always black pilled on Kittens, but after my last visit I’ve been warming up to it. I’m basically just repeating the same process that ended up making Pandoras my go-to: separate the wheat from the chaf, and after you’ve found a few reliable strippers just stick with them every time you go. This review makes me even more white-pilled on the club. Now I know who to take up on a LDA offer and who to avoid next time I go. Thanks for the info share.
review comment
2 years ago
Yeah, if you’re unfortunate enough to find yourself at Deja Vu you’re basically out of luck. Maybe there are a couple gems there, but I doubt it. If anyone knows otherwise I’d love to hear the intel. It’s hilarious that she tried to upsell you on VIP just to get what you should have gotten in the LDA anyway. For 40, she should have been completely naked and you should have been getting in some quality fondling with the top and lower goods. Anything less at Pandoras is just bad service. Incisive commentary from @DudeManBroGuy. I’ve pretty much said the exact same thing in my own reviews, albeit with more words. And I agree, using the word mileage is a bad play. That’s terminology us perv mongers use, not what you should be using on a stripper for a menu. Hope your future days of perving prove more fruitful than this visit, @farco.
review comment
2 years ago
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drewcareypnwnot the real drew carey, but I play him at strip clubs...
If you’re interested in getting intel on the strippers at Sugars @farco, the Sugars IG page has links to every stripper’s personal IG account. Near the top of the Sugars page is the name of every Sugars stripper. Just click on a name you’re interested in and it will take you to their personal IG link. You’ll get a lot more info from the stripper’s accounts then from the club account.
review comment
2 years ago
Sure. Ignore me like the bitch you are. Those “random” details I sprinkle in are for entertainment and to make my writing more engaging. I’m a far more talented writer than you are, and my reviews are actually fun to read unlike your junior high tier quality writing dribble. I actually understand how to write. You don’t. Just know this:you’re a unattractive rapidly aging loser who women don’t find attractive, and will only fuck you if pay them. My ironic “perv” persona aside, which obviously is meant for humor and not literal, women enjoy my company and I don’t have to perv in a strip club and pay women for their companionship. I want you to remember that the next time you find your sad, lonely, ugly ass in a strip club tipping a women who’d never even look at you in any other situation. And yeah, I’ll add a fuck: fuck you worthless fucking degenerate. Bye for the last time.
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
Tell your scammer whore friend Winter I said hi. Maybe one day she can afford a fake ass to go along with the those fake tits.
review comment
2 years ago
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drewcareypnwnot the real drew carey, but I play him at strip clubs...
By “reports” you mean my most recent review presumably. Like I said, I was the only guy there. In my previous trips it was essentially devoid of patrons as well. That was just one evening, but this was on a weekend evening when a strip club should be at peak business. Maybe I was too black pilled on the club. Maybe not. If you go maybe you’ll have a different experience @farco. Either way, your intel on the club if you go will be interesting. I’ll enjoy reading your review.
I see that @drewcareypnw ran into discount Tony Soprano like I did in my third visit there. Same guy by the sound of it. I was luckier on Saturday evening. The DJ and the guy who collected the cover were basically just kids. I’d say early 20s. Cover guy had on a basic T- and a baseball cap on backwards. Definitely a upgrade from made-for-TV mafia don cringe. As far as the LDA / VIP situation at Sugars is concerned, like I mentioned in previous reviews, the LDA at Sugars doesn’t afford the same privacy that Pandoras or Kittens does, so this makes VIP more important. Personally I’d just rather have fun in the LDA at another club than pay premo for what are essentially Kittens wannabe strippers who didn’t make the casting cut at the real one, but each to his own. Like I’ve mentioned in my reviews, my VIP with Bianca was one of the funnest experiences I’ve had in a club so far, so I’d be a hypocrite for throwing shade on some else’s decision to opt for VIP. Overall, a pretty brilliant review that describes the Sugars experience perfectly.
review comment
2 years ago
Oh so you’re back for a even bigger L loser. Why the obsession with me? I already owned your ass twice. Chasing clout by dunking on me cause you have no following?
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Pardon the overused phrase. Like I said, discount Kittens. If you’re getting the same garbage just go to the real one. Barbie is one of those just workin’ her way through school here for the easy dough types. She’d probably be working at Kittens if she’d made the casting cut. If you don’t want to light your money on fire, go for the stripper veterans (i.e., Monse). They actually understand understand stripping, and more likely then not, you’ll actually get a genuine connection with them, because they don’t do the fake hustle. With the Monses of the Seattle scene, you can actually hold a real conversation, in addition to quality service. Just avoid that fucking whore Barbie if you value your precious dinero.
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
@59, you have the reading skills of a 3rd grader. Yeah, it’s fucking incoherent to you because my prose is more advanced in comparison to anything you’ll ever fucking read. Did my SAT line trigger your high school flunky ass? Stop spamming my review with your fucking bullshit. I wrote this review to share intel for those on the Seattle scene, not to accommodate your moronic drama.
review comment
2 years ago
@electronman, you’re a fucking clown. This reviewer is Seattle based and wrote a review of a Seattle club. Who the fuck do you think this review is for? Guys who are living in the middle of Alabama? Obviously it’s for Seattle guys who need intel. Everyone who has gone to Pandoras knows what the Monse experience is. She’s a club legend for a reason. No further explanation needed, as I noted in my own review of this place.
Good to know Luna is working again on mornings. It’s been too long since I’ve seen the Brazilian goddess. I need to catch up. Solid review. Short and sweet and full of useful intel with no bs. The adjudicators are fucking idiots. Shout to @electronman for being even a bigger moron than the other ones.
review comment
2 years ago
How the fuck can I survive these burns. I’m a “asshole and a moron.” Why didn’t you just say “you sir are no gentlemen.” This guy talks like some 70-something (are you?) who thinks the kids still think Nirvana edgy (“yeah, I went to some rock concerts in my youth too-Led Zeppelin, the Stones…”).Fuck yeah-(“you need some lotion for those burns bro?…. I called him a moron….he he he he… get it….he he…”). Fucking H. Christ.
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
Boredstiff can’t imagine a woman actually finding a guy attractive and putting out as a result, probably because he’s some balding 50-something who has to go to the Dominican Republic for pussy. The fact that so many of these losers reflexively think I’m lying when I share my strip club Ws reveals their inability to be attractive to women. It’s literally beyond their comprehension. No woman is going to fuck you @boredstiff. Now go jack off some more shithead.
review comment
2 years ago
Playground. Ever the epitome of mediocrity. I’m surprised you were able to get even that much mileage honestly. Kudos on your negotiating skills. The line about soda refills almost made me throw up though. Will never understand why anyone voluntarily ingests that sugar water poison, but I digress. Drinks at Seattle strip clubs are basically a second cover. For the prices they are charging, I could get one of the finest IPAs in town at a normal club. A little more details would be nice though. Was the $10 tip for the panty drop or were only the top goods out? Being Playground, I’d assume the later.
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
If the adjudicators want to nitpick about anything it should be the occasional spelling hiccups that got through (my apologies). I jotted this thing off fast and didn’t do a proper proof read. As for the 140 figure I mentioned for VIP, remember that the number a stripper will quote you for VIP is a made-up arbitrary number aside from the house fee. How much you pay depends on negotiation and menu options. Anyone familiar with Kittens knows this all too well. Can’t tell you how many times I’ve had one Kittens scammer quote me a VIP price and then another one will come by and give a radically different price.
review comment
2 years ago
“He’s hot as hell?” Damn, didn’t realize you were so…experimental stripper_friend. Glad you have the courage to come out and say cross dressing turns you on. I mean, we’ve all got a lifestyles, even some of ours are more…unique… than others.
review comment
2 years ago
Dances are whatever. You’ll get the usual topless lap dance. Panties stay on. Interesting club for its novelty (who doesn’t like topless waitresses?), but Portland has always been a table dance town. Casa is no exception.
review comment
2 years ago
This is true of Seattle, but not necessarily Portland. I’ve spent literally hours at just one Portland strip club at a time while spending under $100. Remember that Portland strip clubs make most of their money of alcohol and gambling, and as a result don’t charge cover. Portland is mostly a table dance town. Guys go in, buy their drink, throw a couple ones on stage, buy a drink for a stripper they click with, engage in some convo. Rinse and repeat. A lot of the lower end ones don’t even have LDAs. This is the opposite of Seattle, where no one tips on stage unless it’s a out of town newbie. The Seattle strip scene essentially exists for mileage, because it’s simply about the strippers, not any “real” club experience. These girls pay exorbitant fees to the house, which makes them hustle hard. You’re going to a Seattle strip club for pretty much one thing…
review comment
2 years ago
I posted a review similar to this one? I guess you can barely read MrDragon. I wrote a review warning against scammers, not about being that weird loser at the strip club who ogles the stage and never does a LDA. Obviously you’re that bald 50-something came in dressed like discount Tony Soprano “I’m fat, ugly, and can’t get pussy” cheap ass.
review comment
2 years ago
Got to be one of the worst reviews of a strip club ever written. The first girl said she’d “show you a good time?” Yeah, that’s called your moment of opportunity clown. She loudly offered her services? Oh no, sorry she offended your delicate sentiments choir boy. Why the fuck did you even go to a strip club then? As far as I can tell, this fool struck gold from the get-go (if only we could all be this lucky every time), and dropped the ball. These girls sounded like class-A chicks willing to give quality time. He wanted to “go full Karen on her ass.” Pretty much sums this loser up. This review is a unintentional endorsement of the club.
review comment
2 years ago
This guy went to one of the highest mileage clubs in town full of ratchet bitches and somehow still didn’t end up getting the girl naked in the LDA. Panty drop in the LDA is the absolute minimum you should expect here. These sluts are pretty much willing to go anything. They just walked all over you because they knew they could. If the slut is offering anything less than a full panty drop and free hand roaming then walk the fuck away. Or just light your money on fire, which would be more entertaining than getting the LDA equivalent of a non-alcoholic fake beer, which as a side note Kittens actually sells, and yeah it tastes like the piss you’d expect it to be.
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
There are private, curtained off rooms where LDAs are done. I’m not going to waste my time over nitpickers. Everyone knew what I meant. Yeah, the LDA at Pandoras is curtained off in the sense that there is a curtain (barely) separating the LDA from the rest of the club. No, the couches where the LDAs take place are not curtained. Again, this is an obvious distinction.
review comment
2 years ago
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SCPI’ll be in the darkest LDA corner…
Obviously I didn’t give a barista the business. She twerked and fingered HERSELF. These places are always strictly look don’t touch, as they should be. Anyone familiar with these stands intuitively knew what I meant.
review comment
2 years ago
I’m right fucking here rolladx. “The courage of some people behind the keyboard”? Anything I’d say go your face would be ten times worse.
review comment
2 years ago
Maybe you missed the sentence where I said it was the most useless review of a SEATTLE strip club. I’m also a veteran of the Portland strip joint scene, which probably has the most “normie” strip club ( alcohol, food, gambling) vibe in the nation. Actually most of the strip clubs I’ve ever been to have been in Oregon. Yeah, there’s literally at least one in every city in Oregon over a hundred thousand people. Maybe work on your reading skills, and think before you post stupid comments. Bye now.