Bare Assets Melbourne Reviews

Not a great place, but not horrible either. Quality of the dancers isn't that great, 2 or 3 hot ones and the rest are kind of hit and miss. Waitresses are usually the hottest ones in the place. Dances aren't horribly expensive, though the drinks are a little pricey....

I was in the area for work and decided to visit after being in the area for 4 months. This is a small club by Dallas standards. There is a full bar and one stage so you can see everything that is going on. The women are mostly average...

This was the first strip club that I've visited since moving to Melbourne from a big city. It's a pretty small establishment with only 1 stage, but with 3 poles on that stage.

There was about 6 dancers working at the time, but I'd say only 1 of them was...

Hadn't been in for a month or so. Stopped by last week on a Wed or Thu, about 5PM.There were about 5 dancers there. One was at least 30 lbs. overweight, and the others weren't much better. A 40 YO babe, with tatoos around her eyes, comes by and wants...

was a first timer, super excited to experience it but the actual place charges 20$ if you're under 21 which is too much ! the girls were nice though, not too ugly. they couldve had more of a variety of girls, & the place was run down & didnt look...

First time at BA's in about 6 months. Needed to unwind a bit after a long day. First girl to attach herself to me was a petite, very young blonde. Nice looking, but very shy considering location. The next two girls I spent time with were much friendlier. The room...

This club is just disappointing. It is dark, small and smokey. The best girls are average at best and none of them are very friendly. I was there for over an hour and no one even said "Hi". I was sitting at the bar and the...

Stopped by this club since it was near by to see how it was, and I was disappointed. Walked in and headed straight for the bar, after ordering a beer a blond walks up and puts her arm around my waiste. No hello or what's your name just the look...

More dancers than customers. Beat-up faced dancers sat next to me politely for 20 minutes; she was slow to get a clue.

I can't believe anyone would pay $20 for a lap dance in there. Better using that for gas money to get to Mons Venus. ...

CAN THIS CLUB BE SAVED???
Slowly, this club has sunk to about as low as it can get. The day girls are soooo sad I can't think of a single good thing to say. At night things improve, but I'm just gonna classify this as your basic biker bar with...

I stopped by this club just to see what Melbourne verses Cocoa Beach clubs were like. Short story is I would bypass Melbourne and stay with Cocoa Beach,now granted the IR is tough competition so most clubs will find it hard to rate. I got to the club around 5...

I visited Bare Assets for the first time in nearly a year this past Saturday. The parking lot was nearly full, and even though parking isn't the best at this club, a full lot is generally a good sign no matter where you go.

The first door you enter leads...

This place has really gone down hill. Only 4 dancers in the whole place the entire time I was there. Doing 3 song sets each with a 1 song intermission. All 4 were nappy looking. I wouldn't have paid for a private dance with any of...

This was my first time going to a strip club. It was my 18th birth day, and they don't let you in for free if its your birth day. Its a $20 cover charge if you are under 21 and $10 if your 21+, and they charge women. Dances are...

Stopped in while in town for work. Had a few hours to kill between appointments so I decided to try the place out, since even for 4pm, there were several cars in the parking lot (and a vending truck) so I could tell the place was up and running decently...

I went to BA's for the 2nd time since I've been in Melbourne, FL. Not a bad place but not what I got used to while living in PA. It's a topless club, and dancers are on stage for two songs. The first song is generally fully...

Stopped by around 5 or so while in town for a business trip. Only 4 dancers working at the time, and they'd rotate every 3 songs (final 2 were topless). No cover charge at that hour, and bottled drinks were around $4 to $5. Free pretzels and...

Not a bad club. Reasonable drink prices, good looking girls. It can be crowded on weekends, but there is no cover before 8, so even if you stay for a while, it is worth it. They have a lot of good events for football, parties, etc. ...

Good place to hang out on a Sat. night if you're looking at a change from downtown Melbourne. The girls were mainly 6-9's and was a relatively clean place. Worth checking out again. Also worth stopping for cash before heading in because $6 surcharge at the ATM inside is a...

It was raining too hard to drive to Cocoa Beach so I returned to BA to give it another try. $5 cover to enter. A rather large place with lots of chairs but it was about as deserted as I remember from the previous visits. Plenty of...

This is an average brevard club, but the girls are mostly good looking. If you are looking for a good time with gorgeous girls this is the place. They grind and grab pretty well. I had 4 dances in the pvt. 3 were so-so. the last...

Visited this joint in mid-April. Easy to find and seemingly safe neighborhood. Arrived around 11 on a Monday night. Seemed to be about 15 girls and about the same number of dudes. Even with that, it seemed darn slow. Most of the women were in...

I went there after realizing the place down the street was just a brothel. As before, the ladies were a mix of some perfect 10's and some not so perfect. Lots with piercings and tramp stamps, but a few absolute knock outs. The dances were good and...

I stopped by after work a couple of weeks ago and a busty black girl caught my eye.

I don't remember her name but she gave the best private dance I've ever had at this club. Not as much contact as some of the Inner Room but she's hot and...

Since I own a place in Melbourne I have wanted to check out Bare Assets for several years but have always stayed away due to the poor reviews I have read on TUSCL. Finally I stopped in. First the good.
...