Do you like to be alone? Do you notice that you like it more as you get older?
drewcareypnw
not the real drew carey, but I play him at strip clubs...
I took this weekend to have a "staycation" here in Seattle. I rented a room for 2 nights at a nice local hotel, ate out, watched TV, relaxed, read books, visited a few SC's. Much as I love my family, I have really enjoyed the alone time. I feel more rested than I have in a long time. I feel relaxed. I am beginning to wonder if the natural state of a male past a certain age is to increasingly enjoy solitude. I'm in my mid 50's. Or maybe it's just me.
What about you? I know some of the dudes on tuscl are single, older, and enjoying the lifestyle. SC's naturally help in this regard. Would love to hear your thoughts on this.
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Younger years, was probably more of a 90-10 split of alone time to need for some sort of social element. Getting on in years, starting to be more like 5-95 split of 5% socializing, 95% solitude. Even this has been blending into more of a 1-99 split on occasion.
Solitude, though. Not loneliness. Loneliness in my 20's, whenever I'd been isolated, perhaps. Nowadays alone time feels much more restive than it used to. Either that, or productive hyper-focused time. Can also do the vegetative-state, but with virtually none of the restlessness of my earlier years.
My problem is that solitude is actually too comfortable. I've gotten so used to it, I'm sure it's one of my core weaknesses. But that's assuming you buy into the idea that anything that feels too easy is probably some sort of lost growth opportunity.
Anyways, I think most men have it in them to pull off a life of solitude if they so choose (or if they find themselves involuntarily in that sort of circumstance). Wouldn't have believed it in my younger years, though.
I will play along and comment on your discussion.
“Although I am a typical loner in my daily life, my awareness of belonging to the invisible community of those who strive for truth, beauty, and justice has prevented me from feelings of isolation.”
~ Albert Einstein
~ German physicist and Physics Nobel Prize winner
Ich stimme meinem Landsmann zu
I “Think” that we are “alone” in how we perceive ourselves and the world around us in our own life experience…
“The whole conviction of my life now rests upon the belief that loneliness, far from being a rare and curious phenomenon, peculiar to myself and to a few other solitary men, is the central and inevitable fact of human existence.”
~ Thomas Wolfe
~ American novelist of the early 20th century
I will play along and answer your questions.
Q Do you like to be alone?
A: Yes.
Q: Do you notice that you like it more as you get older?
A: Yes.
“Loneliness is the human condition”
“The human condition is defined as the positive or negative aspects of being human, such as birth, growth, reproduction, love, and death.
The word ‘condition’ makes it sound like a disease that we are all born with or some curse that is the fate of all humanity, but it seems the human condition is simply based on time — the time we have on this planet and how we as humans live out that time.
What we do in between the inevitable birth and death defines us, and there in the middle, we find the making of stories that will be carried on for generations to come”
~ study.com.
Knowing that loneliness is part of the human condition makes human beings feel less alone in feeling lonely…
:D
LDK82 can’t even get through the first chorus of a Ramones song without LDKing so I’m not sure you’re much better! lol
I have plenty of opportunities for more meaningful interactions, including with others in my household, and at work, but I do miss the days of traveling for work and pleasure on my own. Of course, the flip side of that you sometimes look at others when you are alone, and may desire some company periodically.
As I got older and after I made the good decision to divorce my wife, despite a bit of painful $$ cost to it, if I absolutely had to choose one or the other I’d choose to answer to no one. However, I currently have an X where we get together for a handful of days about every 5 weeks. Though it is likely to stop at anytime, IMHO this is the sweet spot. Find a woman who likes to get together a couple weekends a month. The remaining time you answer to no one. It’s never stale, I rarely see the emotions run amok days, you will actually enjoy missing each other, but the rest of the time I get to pickup and go to the SC or do what I want without the sometimes mind numbing chatter.
I always respond, “whoa whoa whoa, what makes you think I’m dumb enough to go get married again?” They ALWAYS ends the yelling because she hasn’t figured out how to respond to that yet. Luckily I have a pretty nice wife so those fights are rare.
One another note if something happens to my wife one day I already have a plan to sell my house rent an apartment or low maintenance townhome, eat TV dinners alone, watch sports, exercise, gamble and fuck random women and I’d be totally content with that. The o oh time is talk to anyone is at work and if I’m trying to get into a broads pants!
For me, covid and retirement happened the same time, and I learned, better than I knew before, about lonely. Fortunately I'm good day to day friends with my wife.
Picking up guitar and playing with others now gives me a good mix of social and alone time - you can do it either way.
Add in the occasion club visit and I'm good 👍.
Yeah.
Now get the fuck off my lawn.
Sounds like you had a fantastic job working overseas two weeks at a time in a foreign capital. Can you share what your work involved overseas?
I enjoy solitude as I get older probably because I was always in some type of social situation where I had to interact with the same people in a structured environment. Solitude actually allows me to be a stranger to people I meet without concern that they may or may not like me because probably I'll never see them again.
You wrote, and I quote:
“… ridiculous amounts of fucking with women …”
Pics and Vids or it didn’t happen.
:D
Good Times, Good Times.