On strippers and polygamy
solemnfarrow
Most men that call themselves true mongers would never consider themselves to be in a relationship with their regular girl. That would be antithesis to the entire point of a strip club. No matter how much fun you have, if there are no extras involved, if you see the same girl for several years for the same mileage. What do you get out of it?
Any man in the position of having a regular girl understands that at some level she gives every man in the club the same treatment. Many times we see them as sucker's or Pl for falling to the same routine we have been buying ourselves for years. We make fun of them, knowing our regulars way of hustle and getting dances.
We will say, you don't get the point of the club while partaking in the same fantasy that's maybe a little more personalized. We say we're special, because we know as far as this girl goes, we do get more milage out of frequent spending than most.
But at the same time, even otc ends some time. If you're spending, you'll never get the "authentic" experience of her affection. Does that matter? Is this all a means to an end? A little game, a play we do with the girls to pretend we have something we don't?
Is it pure fantasy? If the relationship is transactional, and you never run out of money and they're up for anything is there really a difference if she gives a shit?
What if she's in a relationship? Good or bad, say a girl doesn't do extras and you see her for years but she's dating and eventually married a guy. You always get the same level, and he supports her and what she does. Do you just deal with only getting to second base with someone you love forever? Knowing it will never go anywhere?
Or do you just embrace the fantasy and what bang you can get for your buck? Where is the line drawn between you being a part of her life and just being a customer, even if you don't want to get anything more?
Any man in the position of having a regular girl understands that at some level she gives every man in the club the same treatment. Many times we see them as sucker's or Pl for falling to the same routine we have been buying ourselves for years. We make fun of them, knowing our regulars way of hustle and getting dances.
We will say, you don't get the point of the club while partaking in the same fantasy that's maybe a little more personalized. We say we're special, because we know as far as this girl goes, we do get more milage out of frequent spending than most.
But at the same time, even otc ends some time. If you're spending, you'll never get the "authentic" experience of her affection. Does that matter? Is this all a means to an end? A little game, a play we do with the girls to pretend we have something we don't?
Is it pure fantasy? If the relationship is transactional, and you never run out of money and they're up for anything is there really a difference if she gives a shit?
What if she's in a relationship? Good or bad, say a girl doesn't do extras and you see her for years but she's dating and eventually married a guy. You always get the same level, and he supports her and what she does. Do you just deal with only getting to second base with someone you love forever? Knowing it will never go anywhere?
Or do you just embrace the fantasy and what bang you can get for your buck? Where is the line drawn between you being a part of her life and just being a customer, even if you don't want to get anything more?
24 comments
Easier said than done, but:
1 - Recognize (and remind yourself) that these are transactional situationships with shelf lives (some short, some long, but rarely forever)
2 - have several favorites at a club, and go to multiple clubs
3 - if you ever feel yourself getting into a rut with the same girl, head to another club for awhile
4 - don't burden yourself with caring too much about their problems. We all have issues, so PLs' energy should be focused on our own issues than those of others
5 - if you ever begin to guilty about "cheating" on a CF, ask yourself if she dances for others guys
The fantasy stripper experience is not real, but damn, it sure is fun. But it's not a relationship, it's just a fun experience - and memories.
Each PL clubs for a different reason.
Sometimes we want adventure, and to roll the dice on an outcome; other times, we want to know we can go to the club, get the experience we want, then go home having fulfilled that goal.
Can't a guy just want to enjoy boobs and beer and, on a good night, bust a nut in a pretty young woman? :)
On one side, you have 100% pure, transactional events. On the other side, you've got... traditional marriage, perhaps.
Doesn't have to be marriage. Whatever it is that makes the most sense for the "opposite" of the purely transactional- it would likely allow for the murkiest timing when it comes to payments and whatever upsides a man typically gets in a "relationship".
So you could be paying huge sums upfront for a lifetime of "relationship", or you could be paying big random lump sums all throughout (while the "relationship" lasts), or you could be paying a giant back-loaded balloon payment (the Western divorce law model that's all the rage these days). And of course, it could be a blend of all of these things.
In the end, you pay. Sure, the timing of payments could be heavily distorted to the extent that you can now call your togetherness "real" or at least more "real" than other folks where their payments fall closer to each micro-instance of "benefit".
Reason why I think this holds, even for most run-of-the-mill marriages -- just try losing your job while not having much passive income. Just try it, and see. Eventually, you're no longer holding up your end of the bargain (it feels this way to me, at least). You're failing to pay up. There may be a delay, but you'll often find yourself headed to the back-loaded balloon payment outcome in real short order.
Folks call it something else, sure. But you're still paying, more often than not.
Yes, there are exceptions, but I'm talking about the hump of the curve, where most of us will find ourselves.
Many instances, but my favorite was when an OTC date showed up with a bag of tricks, and had a seemingly choreographed activities agenda.
However I only ever see myself as the "club bf".
Even if we hang out outside the club I separate "Amy" from "Sapphire(her club persona)".
Does "hang out" mean OTC to help her pay bills? No. It just means hangout.
OTC's are business transactions, even if we both enjoy it.
The strippers I've gotten to know on a personal level always had a separation of business from non-business interactions, at least with me, and there never any SS to get over outside the club. SS was only in the club but I saw it as part of her job.
Some guys may get confused if a stripper is a very friendly or charismatic person.
I made a promise to myself that I'd step away from a stripper if I started to entertain thoughts of a relationship, or wanting to save anyone.
I've seen enough stories from others that I want no part of that experience.