What is the best bumper sticker you've ever seen?

My kid made inmate of the month at Glades correctional institution

1) Be reasonable, agree with me.
2) Just because I'm paranoid doesn't mean that people aren't out to get me.
3) Indecisiveness may or may not be the problem.

Cosmo creamer's Ass Man

Not exactly a bumper sticker - but I’m amazed how many women (but not being sexist) with either “teacher” or “nursing” license plates are horrible drivers. Excessive speeding, tailgating, weaving in and out of lanes, impatient merging etc.

I thought these were supposed to be “responsible” professions

I remember seeing one nurse just driving like a crazy lunatic. And assuming she wasn’t rushing to the ER, all I could think of was - “saving people from dying during the day - trying to kill people at night”

Corvette: I know officer I know - license and registration.

Just two stores side by side, with two large standard neon signs at night: LIQUOR GUNS

Today actually, I was walking into the grocery store and saw a car with a small bumper sticker that said, "if you're looking for a sign to stay alive, this is it."

If you're going to ride my ass, at least pull my hair!

Nuke an unborn gay baby whale for Christ.

“Three out of 10 women are battered.
(But I still prefer to eat mine plain.)”

Bumper sticker that said do you follow Jesus this close?

Reading some of the posts, do some people not know what a bumper sticker is?

“If I’m passing you on your right, you’re in the wrong lane”

My Tesla has a bumper sticker that reads “Fuck you wildebeest!”

I’m trying to convey a message. The message is: Fuck you wildebeest!

ROAR!!!

[ If you're not pissed off ]
[ You haven't been paying attention. ]

It was a linemen’s personal vehicle, “daddy’s working the pole so mamma doesn’t have to.”

And Context22 wins the thread.

BLM - Banging Local MILFs

I've seen it on a couple trucks in my area

Idk about bumper sticker, but I saw a vanity plate once that said “rawr XD”

I guess vanity plates are the last refuge of emoticons. Maybe once all the Gen X cops retire, they'll start letting you put emojis on vanity plates.

Not a bumper sticker, but my favorite boat name of all time:

SAILBAD THE SINNER

" nothing like a 18-year-old pussy. cat."

Save a Tree, Eat a Beaver

Jesus saves, but Espo scores on the rebound.

Used to be wine women and song. Now it's beer the old lady and TV.

Eat drink and be merry for tomorrow you may be in Utah.