Tipping Culture (outside the club)

You’re leaving out the most egregiously abusive factor about the increase of tipping requests, tipping is added revenue for the credit and debit card providers, and very often the businesses are helping themselves to a portion even all of the revenue from this money grabbing scheme.

I think I posted this before, but I had the same reaction at a local liquor store I don’t usually patronize. I was looking for some cold seltzers. I go in, browse the refrigerators, don’t see what I’m looking for and circle back. I decide on a reasonable substitute, grab a 12 pack and take it to the register and the cashier rings it up on an iPad credit card reader. Cashier is a middle aged woman who I take to be an owner or manager. She turns the iPad around and asks if I want to add a tip. This is my first interaction with a store employee and they want a tip for what? Me paying for the product I found myself? NFW

I consider myself otherwise to be a pretty generous tipper but there was literally zero service provided.

One thing I'll say as a positive of all the dumbass requests for tips is that I've started paying more attention to how much I tip & why. I used to tip basically the same amount unless the service was really shitty or really great and even then it's wasn't really all that different. Nowadays, my tip is much more commensurate with the level of service.

Seeing kiosk order & counter serve joints setting default tips at 25% was what pushed me over the edge to start thinking about it.

re: Not tipping at cash registers:

There's a gray area where I sometimes do - the coffee shop server. They swing that little machine around with it teed up for a tip. For some reason, the machine's harder to resist than skipping the tip jar.

I guess the the people behind the counter do provide a service, beyond just ringing up my purchase like at a convenience mart, but it still feels like overreach. As the machines become more prevalent, I'm now leaning toward stiffing the coffee dude.

I will tip Waitstaff; Housekeeping at the Hotel; bartenders; baggage handler and Valets. If I am at a restaurant and see a table with a water view that I want I will tip/buy the table.

@twentyfive do you mean added revenue because of the 3% or so credit card fees they charge to businesses on all the credit card transactions?

^yes

@motorhead - Thanks for bringing this up. I'm curious about the following two places where I tip, and whether the amount is consistent with what others give:

1. Barber. There's like 8-10 barbers at this place and I just go to whichever one is available first. They're all nice guys but I don't have any real barber/customer relationship with any of them. My haircut is just a buzz cut, takes about 10 minutes, and they really can't screw it up. They charge $25 and I give an even $30. Is 5 bucks enough? I usually go once every two weeks.

2. Car wash - the guys who dry off your car. I used to go rarely, not even once a month, and I'd tip like $5 on a $16 wash. Happy to tip because those guys work hard, sometimes in the sweltering heat or freezing cold. Got a new car and signed up for a monthly deal, so now I go about three times a week. No way I'm paying $15 a week in tips, especially since this is a super-express place with cars rolling out at about 3 a minute. The wash is okay, but they don't do a very good job drying it off due to the rapid pace of cars going through. Still, I feel like it's a hard job and they do the best they can. I've been giving $2 each wash. Kind of seems cheap, but hell, that's $24 a month which is about what I pay for the monthly pass. I think a lot of people don't give anything.

As for a liquor store, hell no.

^ I generally tip similar amounts, the barbers have raised their prices a lot recently, and I know that they usually 60/40 their chair with the 60 going to the barber they’re making more money than ever.

It's gotten out of hand. I recently had a new water heater installed, and there was a tip request on the tablet when I signed for the credit card.

I'd rather see minimum wage increased so servers don't depend on tips, and an overall decrease in the prevalence of tip culture.

This happened to me the other day. I was at a restaurant that was very up front about a service charge of 18%. When it came time to pay the waitress (who was excellent) she reminded me that the service charge was not her tip. On a roughly $250 bill (upscale place) I’m already paying $45 in a service charge. I added $20 making my “tip” and “service charge” up to a little over 25%.

I get it, but her hovering over me while I was entering my choice on the mobile credit card machine rubbed me the wrong way. I tried to explain to my wife “I’m not tipping another 20% on top of the 18% I’m already required to do so, but she didn’t totally understand the concept, which I bet a lot people don’t. It’s a risky bet on the restaurant, some people will tip full amount, most probably won’t tip anything additional. The restaurant doesn’t care, because the only one hurt is the server who essentially has to split their tip (the 18%) with the rest of the staff.

The restaurant prices seemed great compared to competing nearby restaurants and now I understand why, they’re essentially 18% less “on paper.”

^I have heard thats a common scam. She might have gotten paid from both your tip and the service charge. Maybe some restaurants are keeping the service charge or splitting it among staff. Idk, several people in both NY and DC have told me the service charge is actually the same as a tip, to only tip more if you want to tip above the 18%

I have tipped 10% to barbers… i dont think its as necessary as tipping servers because they arent reliant on tips like servers are… the other thing is the barber i go to is the owner of the shop itself so i know she gets to keep everything plus gets a cut of all the barbers working for her

I dont mind the tip requests on tablets at starbucks or other places… its something the business itself added as an option, not the cashier or low level worker expecting a tip

A dancer at one point insisted tipping is customary for all dances

@shailynn - I don't understand what she meant by "the service charge was not her tip". If 18% added to your bill isn't a fucking tip, then what is it? She expects people to believe the restaurant is just soaking its customers with an extra 18% for the privilege of dining at their fine establishment? That sounds something like a dancer giving three dances and saying it was five.

My own habits is to tip 20% but I don’t tip if there is a service charge, @shailynn you should have asked for the manager, and asked if the service charge was in lieu of a tip, I wouldn’t have given her anything additional she was scamming you.

@shailynn Man, I would that grind my gears. I tend towards being a generous tipper. And, tipping should be a pleasure, an expression of gratitude and not an obligation. Like, hey, I'm tossing you these bones because I'm truly grateful, not because you asked or I was forced to pay a service fee.

Me, I probably just would not patronize that restaurant again.

Someone i know got hustled by that exact move… service charge of 18% or maybe even more and the server told them they get none of it so they gave the server another 20% cash tip

@ gammanu95 A plumbing company asking for a tip for installing a new water heater?? Ridiculous. I'm sure they charged plenty for the install.

@puddy you mean foreign Africans?

@motorhead Good topic, and yeah, I think seeing a tip jar in a liquor store might just drive me to start drinking... :)

@gammanu95 That water heater tip request was pretty crazy as well. Next thing you know we'll all be expected to tip for surgeries and colonoscopies...lol

If a restaurant server is really nice, I will frequently tip in the 30% to 50% range, or sometimes more, especially if they work at a place where the tips might often be modest at best. I've seen people work very hard, sometimes for very modest pay, and yet they go about their jobs cheerfully. As RonJax2 put it, I'm quite happy to tip those folks nicely as a show of gratitude...

However, like so many others, I'm also growing tired of the "here a jar, there a jar, everywhere a tip jar" shit. Like gamma said, pay your people a respectable wage and stop asking me to tip for anything and everything...

On another note, I wonder if anyone has ever yet told a panhandler that they had no cash, only to have them whip out an expensive smartphone and declare that they could accept electronic payments??? 😂

It’s fucking out of hand. The CEO’s of these corporations ( Starbucks) make multi millions and I supposed to tip their underpaid workers- - fuck that

@shai - Echoing others, if I thought about it fast enough I’d ask for a manager to find out what the deal was. Either she was lying or the restaurant was keeping the 18% service charge. Neither of those situations is acceptable.

@dickdecker - so your response to your anger against the CEO is to take it out on the underpaid worker?

@Puddy Tat Yep, I also won't get out my phone or my wallet, and I usually make it quite clear that I'm not interested in talking to them or being approached. I had a panhandler walk up to my car one time as I was getting ready to leave a club, and the volume of my voice and the scowl on my face made it quite clear that I wasn't interested in hearing his BS...

The solution isnt raising the minimum wage- these servers take up these $2 an hour serving jobs because theyre netting $20, even $25 an hour.
Who knows what the ones at really high end restaurants can net… ive heard some servers are in the 6 figures

They could pay them all $20 an hour, and raise prices at the restaurant to cover it

But in that scenario the workers wont have as much motivation to provide good service.

The other problem is, will tipping culture stop just because server wages are increased. I dont think tipping culture will go away. Then the customer is paying higher restaurant prices and still expected to tip on top

@chunkychicano I can't speak for everyone else, but when I suggest that a more respectable wage might sometimes be in order, I'm suggesting that for all those NON-SERVING jobs that now seem to be constantly requesting tips. As you said, a server might be able to do quite well just on tips alone. But for many non-serving positions, I'd rather see the wages be respectable enough that tipping isn't constantly being requested...

@Puddy Tat Oh, I totally understand. Even if I'm usually assuming that someone is harmless and just trying to scam me, that alone is annoying enough. And just in case they aren't harmless, I also prefer to keep my distance from them for added safety. It really pisses me off when they approach me at gas stations, where I have no choice but to get out of my car for a few minutes...

I even had one guy, after I cut him off mid sentence to tell him that I didn't have any cash, try to SCOLD me by saying that he wasn't about to ask me for money! But that same douche had approached me before and asked for money, and it's not like it wasn't totally obvious what his intentions were...lol

@Puddy Right?!? He probably just needed a good recipe for meatloaf on that day, and I just happened to be right there... 😁

I actually had a random dude ask me about buying drugs in a club parking lot one time, which really caught me off guard. I mentioned it to the manager on duty, and she seemed to think he was an undercover cop... I think that's the only time I've had that happen to me, at least so far!

I go to a chain haircut place. When the kiosk asks me to pay, it gives 4 buttons for suggested dollar amounts. They work out to 25%, 36%, 53% and 71%!! The button to enter an amount is labelled "MORE"

It annoys the shit out of me. I usually tip around 15-18%.

With "no tax on tips" I tip even more than I used to cause it feels like I'm stickin' it to the government!

2 days ago Southwest Michigan gas station, filled up paid at the pump I decided to go in grabbed a Coke and Snickers bar. Gave the clerk $5 bill instead of handling me change and without even asking she just dropped it in jar marked tips sitting on the counter.

I didn't think much of it at the moment as I gathered up my purchase. As I got back into traffic it occurred to me she just gave herself a tip with my money. Yes it was only 40 or 50 cents but that's hardly the point I had just been scammed

^ I don't thinks that's a scam, more like strait up theft.

I agree that recent (post-Covid) uptick in tip requests has gotten out of hand. I generally agree with many online pundits (Dave Ramsey, etal) who often draw the line at tip if they bring food to your table, don't tip if you have to pick up food at the counter. Where the tip request is most prevalent is at the sub sandwich shops (Subway, Jersey Mike's, Dibella's, etc.) In those cases, I'll make exceptions, particularly the ones I go into regularly. If they are prompt, well prepared and stocked (some even have the bread laid out when they see me walk in), I'll tip. But if I have to wait too long because they have to go back to get an item, get bread out of the oven, etc., I don't tip. My time is worth more than potential tip anyway. Wrt other scenarios:

1. Barbers- I often just tell them to keep the change (haircut is $17 or $18, I just hand them a 20).
2. I recently had a new water heater installed, no tip requested for that. I've never had AC guy or plumber ask for tip either.

Good, interesting thread here.

Counter service only: no tip

I also get annoyed by the idea that the bottom suggested tip is 20 percent. 20+ is exceptional service. 15 is satisfactory, 18 is somewhere in the middle.

I'll admit I'm not big on tipping strippers beyond $1-2 per stage show and I only tip a dollar a drink (it's soda bar, two drinks included in admission).

@elmer That's totally ridiculous that she did that...as you said, it's not about the small amount of cash involved, but the principle of it...

Out of curiosity, how does everyone else feel about tipping on to-go orders from restaurants? I've been doing that for a while now, often times just adding a 20% tip even when there's nothing unusual about my order or anything exceptional about the service. How is everyone else handling to-go orders?

Can you believe my proctologist has a fucking tip jar right next to the exam table? Yeah well he's not getting anything from me unless he uses the whole fist.

🔺 $Playing pool with a stripper would

be fun & easy tip money ! If she wins, she gets more money!

Club fan. For carry out, 3 to 5%. If the total is $29.67, I might give 1.33 so I have an even $31 transaction.15 to 20 is for people running back and forth on my behalf. Sometimes I'll toss lose change in a tip jar, minus quarters.

@ClubFan81077

A local restaurant adds a "service charge" on to-go orders. That way the waitress gets a tip whether you eat-in or take-out. The restaurant can go fuck themselves. It's just a way to charge more for their food. The waitress does nothing other than bring the food which is already wrapped to-go from the kitchen to the register.

@mickey48066 @WiseToo Thanks for the replies. I've never been as certain about tipping on to-go orders, and part of that is that different restaurants handle to-go orders differently. One place I go has curbside service, and the person bringing you your food is one of the regular servers that just happens to be on curbside duty. But then sometimes it's the host or hostess, and other times it's the bartender handling your order! So sometimes I may be tipping someone who largely works for tips, and other times I may be tipping someone who's paid a higher hourly wage. And some of my orders are very "standard", while sometimes I have several special requests. I think all of that variance is why I started doing 20%, just so I didn't have to think too much about it! lol

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As for tipping where it is standard, I'm a 10/15/20 guy. I'm usually tipping 20 plus rounding up to make an even bill. I used to go below 10 on only the very rare occasion that I felt personally insulted and management refused to fix it. I knew that by going less, I was stiffing the kitchen and busboys as well as the server, and costing them money as they were taxed for income they didn't earn from me. Now that taxes aren't tipped, I'd like to see the whole thing go away. Most countries don't have tipping industries, and it can even be seen as an insult.

My only problem with the current state of tipping has been going to restaurants where I pay after I order and there’s an option to tip. Sometimes the experience with the person taking my order has been good and maybe a tip is justified. But if I am the one putting my order into the iPad, tapping my card for payment, and doing all the work, while the employee can barely speak a few words… my generosity is pretty much gone.