Times you've gotten jealous of the dancers

avatar for Muddy
Muddy
USA
The other day I was sitting in the front row at a strip club, watching a stripper dance on stage and I thought to myself, verbatim...

"What does she got that I don't got? I can move and grove, I can strut my stuff. I can shimmy shake my ass with the best of them. Tammy don't got shit on me. One day I'll have my turn on stage, to dance the night away, finally have all eyes on me and to show the world the star that I really am........




THAT I REALLY AM"

16 comments

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avatar for TheeOSU
TheeOSU
a year ago
Lol Muddy, are you going Bruce Jenner on us?
avatar for rickdugan
rickdugan
a year ago
😳

Ummm....no....never crossed my mind.

Everything alright Mud? You've been posting some increasingly interesting...thoughts...on here lately, even by your standards.
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
a year ago
My favorite part of this encounter is how you use the name Tammy, kinda like how the rest of the world uses Jane or John Doe, to label your dancer. Lmfao! You must’ve had a fat ass Tammy from your childhood like everyone else has!!
avatar for rickthelion
rickthelion
a year ago
Muddy ape, assuming that you are frequenting strip clubs with sexy female hairless apes and not some sort of weird trans shit I’ll tell you one thing Tammy has that you don’t: tits and pussy. Whereas you presumably have a wang.

And let me tell you something - this rick don’t wanna see no dancin’ wangs. Keep that wang to yourself. Capeesh? ROAR!!!
avatar for Brahma2k
Brahma2k
a year ago
Is this a crisis based on the stripper text bombing flame out? /s
Don’t over complicate it or besmirch it trying to parse out the logic. This is actually one of the more beautiful simplicities of life. There is feminine eye candy and then there is swinging dick. Every metro area has dozens — Tampa metro 40+ — strip clubs featuring feminine eye candy while swinging dick comes in around zero. Just about everyone, even other females, are visually pleased by feminine eye candy. It’s why the magician has the beautiful assistant, the crowd notices her while the magician activates the trap door. Evolution prioritized the visuals for females, it prioritized something else for males. Put another way, a rose and ragweed both have their critical place in nature but one inherited colors to stand out while the other inherited better defense. Imho try not to over complicate why the rose holds beauty, it just does.
avatar for rockie
rockie
a year ago
Muddy: You might be suffering from some Post Traumatic West Virginia Syndrome!
avatar for Manuellabore
Manuellabore
a year ago
No "jealous" per se, but I do have mad respect for good dancers who can do all of these things I could never do: 1.Look fit and sexy (even if they aren't classically beautiful); 2. Put on a good stage show (even if they can't do the acrobatics, but have the moves that hold your attention); 3. Come off the stage and appear to be interested in people they wouldn't give a second look at IRL, for hours on end; and 4. Can work in a bar for hours and hours without getting shitfaced every shift
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
a year ago
Methinks this is a uniquely Muddy problem
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
a year ago
I know that I'm going to hate my self for this diagnosis, but I think that Muddy is suffering from Strip Club Road-trip Oversaturation Disorder, also known as SCROD.

It's completely untreatable and can only be controlled with intensive caning or, alternately, gender reassignment therapy. ( That's a lot more impressive sounding, and a lot more expensive, than a sex change operation.....)😂😉
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
a year ago
What do you call the surgery when a man is changed into a woman?

A lopitoffamy.

What do you call the surgery to change a woman into a man?

An addadicktomy.
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
a year ago
Lets schedule a lopitoffamy for Muddy, and twentyfive has been waiting decades for her addadicktomy.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
a year ago
Chippendales is holding national auditions!

https://chippendales.com/recruitment/

avatar for minnow
minnow
a year ago
I've never been jealous of a dancer. I have been jealous of the son of a bitch that has a hot dancer on lockdown.
(Slowly hijacking thread back in a more tuscl - like direction)
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
a year ago
I can't dance worth shit.
I can't carry a tune and
I'm certainly not pretty.
avatar for JamesSD
JamesSD
a year ago
I have been watching dancers and thought "damn she's fit. I probably should get back into exercise"
avatar for Estafador
Estafador
a year ago
not jealous of much. THey're still women and have to deal with gross men and the typical fears most women worry about. Plus sure some of these women be making bank, but i've met some folks who can proudly talk to bob and brag about making millions without worry of being shamed and I'm learning those same skill sets so I can make $1K a day. How often can these strippers run around on a random tuesday and talk to random susie about her work shift at the strip club
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