The stripper / beef jerky nexus

When she talks about eating a lot of beef Jerky what she was saying is that she wants your Slim Jim in her mouth.

^ just suck don’t chew

To bad for her then I only have a Fat Matt.

She said strippers only resort to Slim Jims in desperation if there is no beef jerky cause they are greasy.

My ATF would eat gas station food. I would often drive her to work and other places because she had lost her license because of DUI. She would ask me to stop at a gas station for a snack. She got nachos and a Red Bull. Or beef jerky. She would even eat a gas station hot dog.

I think I'd rather eat a gas station hot dog rather than the nachos. Pretty sure the "cheese" sauce is used motor oil mixed with mustard.

Stripper hoes like hot cheetos and takes.

I've eaten gas station food. It's not bad when it's fresh. Corn dogs and nachos.

This is the runaway leader for most original TUSCL thread of 2022.

Idk, last brand of beef jerky I had was “Old Santa Fe” from a gas station in New Mexico. It was dry enough to have the consistency of paper.

Also tried out some random place around Sweetwater TX and I was pretty underwhelmed then too.
https://g.co/kgs/AJDafE

Since those two times, I haven’t been too crazy about beef jerky lately

If this is true - then do real Florida strippers eat gator jerky?

There’s a guy who sells it out of his pickup on one of those central Florida highways. I thought he was legit, until I saw that he takes credit cards.

I'm nor a Jerry fan but tried armadillo Jerky before and it was good

Never saw or heard of a stripper eating beef jerky.

As for me, I like it but not something I'll go out of my way to look for. There's a family business that sells their jerky and other smoked/dried meat products at the gun shows around eastern PA. It's easily the best I've ever tasted and I buy some every time I see them, but I don't bother taking their card because I'll never order online or anything. Out of sight, out of mind. The shooting range I go to has Jack Links in the vending machine which is not bad for a commercially produced product.

Beef jerky is code for a hand job.
Eating beef jerky is code for a hand job with squirt into mouth.
Beef jerky festival is code for bukkake.

I've never seen a stripper eat beef jerky. Doesn't mean it doesn't happen, but it does call into question just how typical it is.

I could not tell you the last time I had beef jerky??

Beef jerky is NOT code for a GOOD HJ. It's code for the kind where you have to say "WHOA careful! If you pull that off it's not going to grow back!"

Nobody from TX pays for jerky since road kill is free.

PSD eats gas station donuts.

Presumably "Old Holy Faith" jerky is made out of dead Catholic saints not cattle.

Jerky is a good snack if you're on a low carb diet.

Vegan jerky came up in a convo with a new fave recently. She reckoned it tasted funny :)

Jack Links makes some great varieties of jerky. Awesome road trip food with a couple cans of Monster Energy.

Wait, is this literal or an innuendo 🤔

Monster Energy reminds me of my high school days. Maybe I should drink some soon for nostalgia sake

I thought she meant it literally. But rickdugan is always telling me OTC FS is on offer in any club, maybe you just need to know the gas station junk food code words.

Monster energy drink is most def the perfect chaser for road kill.

I saw a stripper eating bee pollen once. It was odd, seeing her open a Tupperware container and take a spoonful and swallow it down - with a vodka shot chaser.

She told me it was good for her immune system, helped her allergies, and it gave her long lasting energy. I would take her OTC about once a month, and she always gave an energetic performance, and she was close to 40, so it may work? But she never mentioned jerky.

Maybe many jerky-eating strippers stay in the closet so they won't get bullied by vegan strippers.

Side question: can vegan chicks do no spit BBBJ CIM and still be vegan chicks?

At the risk of sounding very true to the state I work in, I'm not a huge fan of store bought, but I happen to know someone who makes homemade venison jerky that is absolutely to die for and now it's the only kind I'll eat! 🦌 (Which means I'm not eating much at all because it only comes around once in a blue moon...🤷🏼‍♀️)