“A strip club under ____ would be ___ “

nicespice
Just for something more lighthearted, figured I’d attempt to make a forum game. Pick anybody, whether or not they would be a member of this site, and make speculations of how somebody would run a club.

I’ll start

“A strip club under Juicebox69 would be filled with cute chubby-but-not-too-chubby white trash dancers. VIP rooms would come with chicken fingers instead of champagne included.

53 comments

Latest

Uprightcitizen
4 years ago
That VIP room would also be a converted outhouse with fancy curtains
FishHawk
4 years ago
If Donald Trump ran a strip club there would be Golden Showers in VIP.
gammanu95
4 years ago
Wow. No time at all before the trolls hijacked this thread.
Uprightcitizen
4 years ago
A strip club under Papi would be called Papi's Big Booty Ranch
DeclineToState
4 years ago
A strip club under Cashman1234 would be called Filthy Whores and be loaded with em
Longball300
4 years ago
A strip club under (me) would be non-stop boobs; female parking valets that flashed you for a tip, topless coat check and hostess, bartenders wearing just a thong, topless waitresses and female restroom attendants that... well you get the idea. The name? hmmm, how about "Top Things Off".
founder
4 years ago
A strip club under founder would be a throwback to the 90s with 4 minute White Zombie songs and attractive fit women and hot flirty waitresses that keep promising to give me a lap dance.

Of course, I'd probably be the only PL in the joint.
shadowcat
4 years ago
A strip club under water would be fishy.
Longball300
4 years ago
I would be right there next to you founder; especially those shot girls that used to inhabit The Masters in Myrtle Beach that would give a hot, sometimes topless, table dance while serving up your test tube shot in between their boobs.
Longball300
4 years ago
🤘🤘
skibum609
4 years ago
A strip club under a progressive would be as exciting as watching paint dry on a humid day.
Muddy
4 years ago
A strip club under Clubber would be a Vietnamese sweat shop

A strip club under Papi would ensure Precious would never be unemployed again
misterorange
4 years ago
A strip club under Joe Biden would have the PLs sitting in their cars honking.
twentyfive
4 years ago
Muddy would hire Rick Dugan to be the manager of his club and they’d require all the bouncers to wear white three piece polyester suits and every night at midnight the band would play The Bee Gees “Night Fever” with muddy and Rick disco dancing on the stage.
That’s some funny shit right thar
Git er done
🕺🕺
Muddy
4 years ago
Sign me up! When you boil it down, I'm really just a wannabe John Travolta at the end of the day.
twentyfive
4 years ago
👍
Git er done
rattdog
4 years ago
first blank: biden
second blank: filled with many, many young girls. and the younger the better.
datinman
4 years ago
A strip club under Shadowcat would be Follies recreated.
A strip club under JustinTolook would be Tanga Lounge Tampa recreated.
A strip club under Reverendhornibastard would be full of hot Indonesian desploogination service professionals.
A strip club under IceyLoco would be in his mom's basement.
A strip club under CC99 would be devoid of women, just waifu pillows.
A strip club under SJG would be bankrupt in a week.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
A strip club under SJG instead of dollar dances would have dollar FRMOS
Eve
4 years ago
^ The private dance rooms would just be kissing booths!
Huntsman
4 years ago
A strip club under Spice would have a hookah lounge.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
A strip-club under Papi Chulo would be called “Da’ Brickhouse” – if you are not voluptuous or into voluptuous women, then keep on steppin’ – I would corner the market on “old school real womenz” – below would be a prototypical dancer (and even more voluptuous) – I would scour the globe for this type of woman (no matter the race) and do everything possible to get them to dance @ Da' Brickhouse:


https://xhamster.com/videos/mom-with-tit…
twentyfive
4 years ago
^ you are now officially tied with Shadowcat as a leading cause of blindness
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
^ keep on steppin'
twentyfive
4 years ago
👨‍🦯👨‍🦯👨‍🦯👨‍🦯👨‍🦯👨‍🦯
Eve
4 years ago
I think a strip club under Eve would just be a lesbian bar.

I've seen vegan strip clubs... I've seen a pregnancy strip club... I've seen a strip club that doubled as a church on Sundays... I wanna see how an all-girls (dancers/staff/custies) strip club would turn out.
twentyfive
4 years ago
^ Wouldn't a vegan strip bar be the same as a no extras club ?
Eve
4 years ago
I should not have thought as hard as I did about that question.
nicespice
4 years ago
What vegan strip club is there other than the Casa clubs in Portland?
twentyfive
4 years ago
@Eve LOL
@nicespice IDK
Eve
4 years ago
I could have sworn there was more than one, but I at least knew they/it was in Portland.
lopaw
4 years ago
Eve, I volunteer to be your first customer at that lesbian stripclub that I know you will open one day :)

Vegan stripclubs really exist? Who knew!
Eve
4 years ago
Okay, there may only be one vegan strip club, <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=beA-HMLV… we also have...</a>



@lopaw, you will be the first to see and taste - er, test everything and everyone at my grand opening ~
lopaw
4 years ago
Gluten free lapdances!
I'm sold!

I'm gonna start hoarding dollah bills for that grand opening....yum
twentyfive
4 years ago
Hi Lopaw haven't heard from you in a while hope your good !!
lopaw
4 years ago
Hi twentyfive! Long time no see! I drop in here from time to time and barely recognized the joint today....so many changes. Clubs are still "officially" closed in my neck of the woods and I'm jonesing bad for my usual dayshift frolicking. How u been?
TFP
4 years ago
I'd have to start making annual visits to Papi's club if it ever opened. Imagine going from dancer to dancer and being smothered nonstop in boobs like those. Damn!

And on an off topic side note, the way you said 'scour the globe' reminded me of this scene from the movie 'Pulp fiction'. https://youtu.be/UnZ7vhAWHN8

mike710
4 years ago
Is it OK to be a Vagitarian if you don't go all the way Vegan?
Eve
4 years ago
^ Huh. Almost exactly like a pescetarian... but with a nicer ring to it.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
I like women that are into the penisterian diet
Eve
4 years ago
I don't think you'd find any penisterians at a lesbian strip club if we're talkin just the dancers and not the female custies. Some could still be omnivores like myself and just may be in the mood to eat something besides man meat.
Nidan111
4 years ago
Fuck everybody’s post.

Under me, it would be. ...

Puffy Nipple Paradise!!!

I would be the judge and I guarantee dancer PERFECTION!
Cashman1234
4 years ago
DeclinetoState - that would be a great club - the filthier the better!
Cashman1234
4 years ago
A strip club under Juice would be called Waffle House and it would be filled with well fed southern girls who like extra creamy gravy on their tits!
MackTruck
4 years ago
A stripe club under me wpuld have $5 lapperz and da flapper jack tiddys galore
nicespice
4 years ago
A strip club under BBBC would be a pink treehouse with a rainbow sign that says “no girls allowed” 😝
blahblahblah23
4 years ago
Lol @ heaving

And I would totally go to a papi chulo strip club
Cashman1234
4 years ago
A strip club under PoleDancer83 would be a whore house with filthy street whores who like it rough - and who have a 6 gallon tub of lube by their beds - and with an ample supply of powder.

I think PD would be a great house mom - as she would be like a cut man in a fighters corner. She’d throw some lube on the whores - let them spit in a bucket (or piss or shit it out in the bucket) - slap them on the ass - and tell them to get back out for another round!



mike710
4 years ago
A strip club under Joe Biden would be called the Whitehouse. Kamala would be the house mom the rules the dressing room with an iron fist and collecting a 50% sin tax from the dancers tips every night.

Hunter Biden would be around all the time selling crack to and impregnating the strippers.

Nancy Pelosi would be a feature dancer that would rock the house in her dolphin safe fishnet over the top of her depends. She would have a special VIP room in the back with a glass of water filled with Eferdent tablets to store her teeth while she gave her famous gum jobs. They know she needs a break when her nose starts running.

The bartender will be AOC of course. The DJ will be Bernie Sanders and he will call out 2:1 specials with a twist. You will be charged twice as much for a single dance while the strippers hand out t-shirts with pictures of Fidel Castro and Che Guevara on them. AOC will have similar drink specials where you pay twice as much for a single drink.

Every parking space will have a plug in for your hybrid with the exception of a few open for the horse and buggy Amish Uber service.

The bouncer will be Corn Pop. With the exception of Joe, he is still the baddest man from the mean streets or Wilmington Delaware. He walks with a limp and uses a cane after that ass whipping Joe gave him in the 60's

The dancers must sign a waver to not shave any part of their body and wear sensible shoes that aren't made from any animal product. You will know the dancers that have been there the longest because they have started to look like Sasquatch.

Elizabeth Warren dances here but the other girls hate her because she demands the best locker location because her cousin's mother's uncle came to the new world with Columbus and impregnated a local girl.

Most of the music played by Bernie is from the artist formerly known as 50 Cent. He now goes by 20 Cent after getting taxed to death.

The clientele consists of Chinese, Russian and Ukranian nationals that are seen being led by Hunter into a backroom with the name "Big Guy" on the door.

This turned out to be kind of a mini review of the new club opening in DC next January.
Eve
4 years ago
"... Kamala would be the house mom ..."

I hate it already.
rogertex
4 years ago
LOL LOL LOL ... you guys are cracking me up
(Thanks Nicespice!)

A strip club under Muddy would feature Mud Wrestling everyday
A strip club under sinclair would have dancers with nametags and visiting cards
A strip club under doctorevil will require dancers to wear Nurses costume
A strip club under wallanon will issue a Frequent Clubber Card (with perks)
A strip club under Roadworrier will require dancers to grind on customer laps for a post-stage tip.
A strip club under Papi_Chulo will only allow dancers with asses bigger than a double-wide
A strip club under desertscrub will ban all club advertising
A strip club under SJG will have two chumps in the Front room, playing a board game. And no dancers.
A strip club under Founder will have separate rooms for Political Discourse, Dancers-only, Verified customers
A strip club under skibum609 will extend nudity to barely legal levels
A strip club under shadowcat will price VIP services starting at - (100 minus customer age). At 100 everything would be free. Really
A strip club under Mactruck will feature clean restrooms (even after crazyjoe's visit)
A strip club under rogertex will offer dine-in "and" take-out lappers
A strip club under cashman will ban use of Credit Cards
A strip club under Nidan would require every stripper to know the difference between a Tight End & Wide Receiver.
A strip club under Eve will feature Royal Feast on Menu card ($100 for Drink, Ribs, Massage and Dance)
A strip club under nicespice will feature Spiced Royal Feast (plus Appetizer at front door - Metal detector replaced by two dancers with frisk duty)

.... keep it going

Eve
4 years ago
A strip club under doctorevil would require you to buy dances/VIP from at least 2 strippers at once instead of 1.
busta_nut
4 years ago
@Mike710 You are wrong..
Kamala would be the Queen of Extras.. as she is already so experienced in and out of the club.
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