Are most nightclubs(non-stripclubs) scammy for men?

Beat100
NOTE: I will try to simplify for the sake of brevity and argument. I'm not trying to BASH nightclubs but rather want to give my honest opinion of my observation.

I have traveled around in Las Vegas, LA, and NYC and I find it that most nightclubs are scammy for men.

Many of my friends have wanted to go to nightclubs since:
1-They believe they can have good conversations with girls, thereby, improving their social skills.
2-They want to at least get physical with a girl(it can range from getting to dance with her to even getting a kiss.)
3-They believe they can get laid.

Whenever or not my friends are misguided about pursuing these goals at the nightclub, the nightclubs seem to have no issue letting them believe whatever they want. When I was talking with the doorman at the club he said the nightclub's goal only goal was the make money by selling drinks.

The nightclub lets the women in for free and the women draw the guy's in. Like Tupac said, "Rap for the women, not the men, if you rap for the woman, the woman will buy your records and the men want what the women want."Of course Tupac said it in less flattering terms, however, the message remains.

This is a simplified model, however, what I will often see is:
1-First floor you have a 80% of guys and 20% of girls. It's a complete sausage fest and you have most of the guys buying girls drinks. Most of the girl's are in large groups with other guys in their group.
2-Second floor you have the private area, sometimes restricted where you have promoters, VIP hosts or ballers. Usually the ratio is flipped and you have 80% of girls and 20% of guys. Most people do not leave their table.


My argument is that unless you are a promoter, a friend of a promoter, or you can pay your way into the vip section or a host is not worth going to the nightclub for goals 1,2, and 3. Since the average man he will have to deal with a sausage fest, most guys will try cockblock, most girls will try to cockblock you as well, the venue is way too loud to talk to anyone. Usually, since there are far fewer girls most girls will not treat the guys nicely(hence a lot of bitter guys online) of course if a woman is being approached by tons of guys she will have turn most of them down.

In contrast, most strip clubs are the complete opposite at least for the average guy is a much more pleasant experience. Moreover, you can fulfill the first two goals and potentially even the third depending on either your money or your game.

27 comments

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Icey
4 years ago
CD if a girl is attracted to you it doesn't matter who else is around or where you are.

If you flex by getting bottle service and a table you'll attract bottle rats and get played. They'll show up if you invite them again but theyre there for a free night out not you.

In a strip club you get what you pay for. The girls are paid to provide a service ie dance so of course they won't be rude when youre paying them.

But you can meet girls anywhere if youre each other's type
docsavage
4 years ago
I used to have a regular in a strip club that was very attractive. I told her one time she looked like a young Elizabeth Taylor and she didn't know who that was because Taylor was an actress before this girl was even born. I asked her one time if she goes to clubs. I had never been to one. She said not usually because she isn't interested in the guys there but sometimes when she is feeling a little down or depressed she would go to one because all the attention would give her an ego boost. I think the clubs would be filled with a lot of girls like that. Since they aren't looking for sex your chances with them are low. You would either have to be in the top twenty percent of guys or be willing to go home with a below average girl to have a good chance.

Many guys don't really get this aspect of women. They don't get an ego boost just from a female being friendly. I've heard this referred to as being put in the "friend zone" and this is seen as an undesirable place to be for men. Younger men have to learn ways to avoid giving women what they want without getting anything back in return. You need to learn to eject from a situation quickly if it appears you are being exploited. If a girl is actually interesting maybe she might be worth talking to at a club but just talking to a girl or buying her drinks in hopes of sex is probably a waste of time. It sounds like you have correctly identified the situation in clubs where there are a lot of guys being friendly and a few girls not making an effort to be friendly as a place to stay away from.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
With some exceptions, men and women have a different makeup and motivations - the avg girl does not go to the club to get laid; even less if she's hot and is likely not hurting for attention even outside the club - most girls like to go and hang out and have a good time and thus what the OP mentioned about the VIP area being where there are more girls than guys b/c the girls are there to have a good (VIP) time - and as @doc mentioned above, often times part of that enjoyment is the attention they get (which seems to be a thing for many women especially hot ones whether in the club or not).

At the end of the day if a guy can't get laid or pick up girls outside the nightclub, unlikely he'll have any better luck inside the nightclub - many girls actually seem to be extra-defensive in the club b/c they know what most of the guys are up to (and why the girls often hang in groups and often don't leave the safety of the pack).

At the end of the day - it *is* a social-setting and there will be lots of people in a club so in a way it does lend itself to being able to meet someone - but at the end of the day if one is not good at picking up girls outside the club usually they won't do much better inside the club (and sometimes worse) - not to mention that often times club guys hit on the hottest girls which don't need nor want the attention and are likely out of the guy's league.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
There's a reason why prostitution is the oldest profession in the world - it gives men immediate access to sex when they want it w/o having to "court" a woman, "win her over (convince her)", or have to be a in a relationship in order to just get a little pussy - for the most part you get to choose who you wanna fuck, vs who will allow you to fuck them and under what conditions - sure there are some guys that are good at getting pussy, but even then it's not a high success rate and there is often effort and time involved if not some kinda commitment.

If a guy is looking for a partner (GF, etc) and is unable to find one for w/e reason, then better to hit a strip-club and enjoy what it has to offer vs suffer-alone per se,
chessmaster
4 years ago
The nightclub industry is dying(before corona virus) because guys have caught on to what the night club really is. Savage and papi hit the nail on the head. The women that go out to the night club are looking for attention true, but attention specifically from Chad. They expect free drinks(and attention) from all the other guys for nothing in return. As a result, this is why you see more and more women at the gym, at the strip club, anywhere they can be the center of attention really. Thats what the night club ultimately used to provide women when they didnt get enough attention on social media and in their day to day life.
minnow
4 years ago
Main theme seems to be that satisfaction is a "numbers game", whether venue is a nightclub, or strip club. As outlined by some posters, the odds don't favor "AJ/"AS"/"AG" (Average Joe/Schmoe/Schmuck/Slob/Guy) in the night club sausage fest. A 1:4 guy to gal ratio isn't favorable to the guy, especially when many of the females aren't "motivated providers."

By contrast, the off peak hours that many tuscl members visit strip clubs can sometimes have a dancer: customer ratio of 1 : 1, or better. Worst case, maybe 1 : 2. Even then, several slouches in that group of men. Even on a crowded sausage fest ratio of 1 : 4 (which, IMO would be worst of worst case), still a significant percentage of duds/non-spenders which would still make strip clubs better odds for satisfaction. Plus most, if not all dancers are motivated to provide at least a rudimentary level of satisfaction in return for $$ spent.

I'd be curious to hear from Tuscl dancers like Eve, PSD, etal on the percentage of male customers on typical weekend night are serious spenders, vs non spending spectators.
Beat100
4 years ago
@minnow
Agreed. At least to me stripclubs seems to be much more single/solo male friendly environment.
While nightclubs seem to give most guys the cold shoulder. It seems they make their money of a small group of big spenders(in the vip section) who will only spend money if there are girls in the club.
Nightclubs seem to be much more friendly towards group of friends, groups of women, or of single women.

It'll be interested if the women over here could do a comparison of stripclub vs nightclub. For instance,a. dancer friend said at least the stripclub she went to was more competitive and she saw the dancers and other girls are competition, of course there are exceptions.
However, in nightclubs these is the opposite, it seems most average girls have the red carpet thrown at them. For instance, I remember going with two female friends and they were dressed extremely casually(jeans, t-shirt and boots) and they still go in the club. Meanwhile, many well-dressed guys were denied entry.

At least from my perspective, they both seem like very different cultures, environments. In general, I would say that for the average guy he would have better luck organizing his own house party to boh socialize and men women than bothering going to the nightclub.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
Strip clubs and nightclubs are two very different businesses - it's like comparing cars to rollerskates
Eve
4 years ago
Nightclubs used to be fun when I was fresh into college and learning how to experiment with what I've never experimented with in my early youth.

Now, they have no use for me. Night clubs generally have a younger capacity, and younger guys VERY rarely interest me - be it just for clubbing/partying or potentially hooking up. So with that ruled out, the only thing night clubs really have to offer me is a place to drink heavily and talk to my friends, which... I can literally do anywhere else without the overbearing presense of guys hoping to 'score'.

To kinda sorta answer Minnow and Beat's question; Pre-Covid, I would avoid working weekends as much as possible for almost the same exact reason I avoid regular clubs at any time of the day/week/etc. The clientele is mostly college/frat/young military guys that think in order to reel in the pussies of dancers, they only have to spend just a pinch of money as bait (1 or 2 dances tops) and then use their looks to do the majority of the work. Some don't spend at all and when offered dance curtly reply "No, but I'm/we're looking for a girl to come party with us back at my hotel room if you're down." These guys don't think they need to spend money at a strip club to get a girl's attention or to sleep with us because their mentality is that of going to a nightclub where we're just dancing just for a little extra money/for fun but are still DTP (down to party) if asked politely and if they deem themselves attractive enough to get an easy 'yes' out of us. The only custies that seem to not fit this group during the weekend are ones who already know what dancer they want to talk to/get dances from.

Post-Covid; Weekends have been the only reliable nights to work because the weekdays will be slow and clubs have been overcongested with girls that make the competition fierce. So I have to deal with these younger party guys much more often now, and getting them to buy dances compared to your average monger is like pulling teeth.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
A strip-club is about a business transaction, the women there are *working* and their job is to extract $$$ from men; they can't do that giving men the cold-shoulder and acting stuck-up - you can't compare nightclubs to strip-clubs and the behavior of the women in each one - in a nightclub you are just a horny dude trying to get into their pants - in a strip-club you are a client/paying-customer and thus the treatment will be very different.
Eve
4 years ago
^ How DARE you call them paying customers. They are our friends and they truly believe that we can get along well outside the bar and can get a real thing goin' cause we just vibe like that.
Eve
4 years ago
No, real talk, I literally can't with the mentality some of these young men carry. Some dancers love take advantage of that with their bait and switch technique (oh yes, I would love to go home with you, I bet that cock is big and juicy, I'll want to fuck you all the time!)...

...but I don't have the energy or intellect for that.
Beat100
4 years ago
I'm slightly more optimistic than you guys and agree with some of the points made by heaving and Eve. One thing that we are forgetting is the treatment from dancer, SB's, cam girls..etc, matters a lot. The girls who give their customers good treatment are much more likely to have longevity and continue succeeding in their goals(Be financial, career, or personal). Meanwhile, the girls who are "man-hating" tend to eventually get stuck and can't find a man willing to invest in them. For instance, I know many SB who date someone for three weeks then it ends then a new guy,as they get older they start dating lower quality guys.

The reason I'm comparing them is that many young guys are sold the lie that if you go to the nightclub it'll be a great experience appealing to them. However, why should they invest many in a place that treats them as second class citizens? Instead, I'm suggesting they should save their money and go to the strip club, for the type of experience that most of them want some are laidback,no pressure you go there to chill and get a dance when they feel it.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
One can't put blame on a nightclub - it isn't the nightclub's job/responsibility to enable a guy to score - the nightclub has no control over that nor do they say a guy is gonna score by going to their club - all they try to do is get girls to wanna go to the club and is up to the guys to try and score - it's like a casino - the casino provides the games but it's up to the person that thinks he can win to go in.
WavvyCain
4 years ago
Only a scam if ur ugly
Muddy
4 years ago
I haven't been to a nightclub in a while but that doesn't mean I completely, I do think it's a good place to meet women.

Cons
-Yes a lot of clubs out there are sausage fests unfortunately.

-Unlike the strip clubs I'm gonna strike out a ton at nightclubs and go home empty handed. It happens.

-The music is just pure shit. I would actually like to go to a nightclub if it was 1998,9 night at the roxbury era music and starting grooving. It was stupid music but really catchy and easy to dance too like an idiot. Today though? No. Just no. 70's 80's seemed like a great time for nightclubs aswell. The last decade plus of pop music has been such a disaster. When the south took over hip hop from NYC it killed the genre let's keep it a 100.

-Home of the megadouche. That's where they all gather.

Pros
-Honestly where else are there a bunch of girls just hanging out like that. It's out there, maybe some bars but most bars are even more sausage festy. Depends where.

-Easier to engage. It's where your supposed to be engaging. Everybody knows what time it is. The supermarket, sidewalk, DMV etc. maybe a little more uncomfortable for some.

-You don't really have to be a great talker or go into deep dialouge. Just start dancing and say a little something.

At the end of the day I prefer strip clubs but if my buddies wanted to hit a nightclub I would be down to tag along. Myself? Only if it was like a cool throwback night I'd go. I get enough action from strippers and sugar babies where I would just have fun and see what happens, I don't feel the pressure to make something happen and that is very liberating.
skibum609
4 years ago
I'm from a different generation, but clubs when I was a kid and young man weren't like this. It's where we went to meet women and strip clubs weren't even remotely considered as an alternative.
Tetradon
4 years ago
I don't know if they're a "scam" but I hate nightclubs with a passion. Dancing to blaring insipid music, crowds of obnoxious drunks, flashing lights closely resemble hell. Back in the day, I could tolerate them if sufficiently wasted to people watch. But to meet people? Fuck no.

Strip clubs serve a completely different purpose. I'm there to be entertained with sports and tits, and occasionally extras, not to meet people to "party" with. Good conversations are a bonus.

My civvie dating was 90% online, 10% friends of friends, meeting out and about, etc pre COVID. Now it's more like 100% / 0%. Again, separate purpose from either night clubs or strip clubs.
datinman
4 years ago
I can't speak to nightclubs. It has been 20 years; that is a younger man's game. Hotel lounges on the other hand have been rewarding with some regularity. Sweeping generalization here, but in my experience a single women in a hotel bar is either bored, lonely, or a pro. If they are receptive to a drink and conversation, you stand a pretty good chance. Some cities, (New Orleans for example), hotel bars pay better dividends than nightclubs or stripclubs.
Icey
4 years ago
Clubs aren't all that but I don't get why all the hate.

Clubs are a fun environment to go to and listen to music. Dance. Get attention from girls.

If a woman is attracted to you it d9esnt matter where you meet her. She'll be down to getting with you. Could be a club or a supermarket.
Beat100
4 years ago
@skibum609
The nation is going on steeper competition for men. Men started going to the bars , nightclubs and its a sausage fest. Then these guys along with PUA started to go to malls, coffee, shops and they got banned, got in trouble. So now most are online and some are going to stripclubs seem to be one of the last places to go to.
Icey
4 years ago
That's bs. Its not like they go in public as a group or wear matching pua shirts.

You can hit on anyone anywhere. No one cares. Men and women flirt in any social setting.
JamesSD
4 years ago
I always preferred dive or hipster bars to clubs although these days getting laid is mostly about the apps.

Clubs are only fun for guys if you go in a mixed group. Girls always leave with the group they came with. The hook ups often occur as a result of the after party.
rattdog
4 years ago
what does one expect? the nightclub industry caters to a group of people that most of them can be labeled as the most shallow in this planet. nightclub owners know that if you let in the room some high maintenance bimbs for every one out there 3-6 guys will be breaking out the cash and cards.the same goes for those classy lounges with no tv's, and have candles and booze on each tabletop under dim lights.

a girl i used to know told me that when you see a group of good looking girls together, most of the time they are there not to pick up anyone. they are there mostly for one thing: they like to ________ on people.

so one night i'm at a divebar and i see two nice ones hanging out.we talk, and eventually i find out they're both unavailable and just having a girls night out.

midway during the convo i decided to say, "ay, i know your secret. when girls are hanging out at nightclubs and bars, most of the time you're not there to meet guys."
"oh really? so what is it that we do?"
"you girls like to _____ on people."
"omg!!!! how did you know that?"

they were so impressed they bought me two rounds.

anybody here want to guess and fill in the ________?
Eve
4 years ago
^ Squirt.
Papi_Chulo
4 years ago
"... they are there mostly for one thing: they like to ________ on people ..."

^ shit on people
rattdog
4 years ago
we have a winner. congrats papi!!!!

actually the exact word was goof. but the judges would have accepted shit just as well.
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