Single-airport single-night mongering destination in North America?
Book Guy
I write it like I mean it, but mostly they just want my money.
Let's assume I'd like to fly into a major airport somewhere in North America, stay in a rather standard airport-area hotel, for one maybe two nights, and do nothing there but monger at strip clubs. I would wish to enjoy absolutely top-notch eye-candy, of course, to get me horned up from time to time, but that's just a desired, not a required, option. I would also absolutely REQUIRE legit. mongering opportunity at and inside the strip clubs, mongering which provided (with the perpetual caveat that YMMV) full-service or at least pop-my-cork, with the services taking place within the strip clubs which I attend.
I want the strippers to be the providers. Assume, please, that I won't pay-for-play back at the hotel room, won't try to make a dancer into a new CF by investing time attending her club week after week since I'll be leaving the city immediately, won't attend massage parlors or other rub-n-tug joints OUTSIDE the strip-club itself (or clubs themselves), won't see street-walkers, won't hire internet-advertised escorts. That's my preferences, because what I really like about strip-clubbing is the act of SEEING and ASSESSING and even INTERACTING WITH the girl BEFORE I pick her. I want that kind of info and maybe connection-vetting before I decide to commit to paying for her services and then actually expending the money for them.
Ground transport may be a major expense? I won't be driving (therefore I will be free to drink alcohol, though I don't intend to go on an alcohol-bender) so I'll be taking Uber or a taxi or whatever other app or ride-share or public-transit is available. Fly in, Uber to the hotel, check in, Uber to the strip club, play the game(s), Uber to the hotel, crash out, next day Uber to the strip club repeat, Uber to the airport, fly home.
Given all the above, which city's airport, and which clubs near to it, would you most recommend? My short list presently runs along the lines of Houston, Tampa, Miami (West Palm, up Northerly near to Diamond Dolls; but it's difficult to get a flight to an airport near Pompano), Atlanta, Detroit, or perhaps Toronto or Vancouver. I'm actually not sure if that's a good list at all, just my first guesses. I would want to factor into the decision the cost variables -- flight, no-tell-motel or nice-airport-style hotel room, distance from hotel to club(s), hence cost of rides in ride-sharing or taxi, usual price for entry and lappers and drinks and VIP entry and extras service(s) from the girls at the clubs; as well as the time-cost and effort-cost of things like finding the right clubs, whether or not out-of-town customers are treated as well as regulars, likelihood (guaranteed please!) of adequate level of service, tolerance of local jurisdiction law enforcement, what-not else.
A fun thought experiment! What city to visit for a set of drop-in in-the-club services in North America? I ask this question, or a version of it, from time to time here and at other boards, to try to keep my finger on the pulse, so to speak. I might some day actually engage in one or another of these Monger's Strip Club Fantasy trips.
Your suggestions?
Got something to say?
Start your own discussion
39 comments
Latest
Ft Lauderdale - Pompano clubs are not that close to the airport. Tootsie's is not too far away. Uber is available but traffic can be a headache on I-95.
Detroit. Probably your winner. Flight Club and Landing Strip are close by. Several hotels are close by also.
Atlanta - You don't want to do anything close to that airport. Follies is a long ways away.
Tampa: Mons Venus, 2001 Odyssey and Scores right next together near airport and a trashy motel right there too.
I stayed at beach near Fort Lauderdale airport and Diamond Dolls and Tootsies were expensive cab rides away.
Forget Vancouver, clubs are expensive and mostly air.
Maybe Dallas. DFW airport has some clubs not that far, but DAL Love Field has you closer to a bunch of clubs like Baby Dolls and Buck's Cabaret (I believe). Again, I've rented cars there for less than $60/day all in. Extras are harder in Dallas dance areas are out in the open, and VIP rooms are not that private. But gotten very good mileage in Dallas clubs and had talked to some girls that were up for OTC, but I didn't partake.
Atlanta - if you are staying 2 nights, you could Uber to Follies and Tattletales. Follies day shirt, Tattletales night shift. Hotel choices are endless and range from 2 star to 5 star. I would hotel NE of downtown (20 miles from airport) and then both clubs are within 5-10 miles.
City Of Industry located about 20 miles east of Downtown LA.
It's about the same distance from LAX to COI as it is from Ontario Airport to the east of COI. But LAX will have many more flights landing from the east than will Ontario. Plenty of low-cost hotels nearby, major chains and hooker hotels, so lodging and Uber's will be reasonably priced, once you get to the area. Also, some major hotel chains may offer free or low cost shuttles from either airport.
What is more important, ITC mileage or number of options? If mileage is number 1, DTW and Toronto seem like obvious choices. (FWIW, DTW is my fav airport.) DFW seem like a likely pick if your looking for more of a club crawl.
As much as I liked Mons V, it isn't and extras club and TPA isn't a great airport.
Dallas- If you fly into Love Field, it's ~ 7 miles or so to several Northwest Hwy hotels that are within walking distance of Baby Dolls and Men's Club, and quick Uber from Chicas Locas. I think L' Ellegant hotel has van shuttle, but Days Inn and Holiday Inn Express would be more in line with your $$ wishes. Not sure if they have complimentary shuttle service. The Lodge is about 3 to 4 miles up NW Hwy- not the best mileage prospect, but something that should be experienced at least once.
I would mention LAX, except for your drinking stipulation. From a monger standpoint, Bare Ellegance and Jet Strip (both nude, non alcohol) are quick Uber near airport and associated hotels. The infamous COI area is just too far from LAX and ONT for sane Uber. Paucity of nearby hotels also bumps it off your list.
That is my suggestion. Hell, the girls all have condom in hand at all the places mentioned except hustlers, PTs and Onyx.
Otherwise, lots of interesting excellent suggestions, thanks guys! I think it's fun to think this stuff up and share the ideas, but if I do schedule a trip I'll share my itinerary with y'all when it becomes a reality.
Personally, if I were you I head overseas and you’d get exactly what you want with so much less effort.
ITC options here really poor, so when I can get a couple days off, I fly somewhere.
Every 2 months, I fly to San Diego on a Monday, Uber to the border for about $30, cross to TJ, and take a $5 taxi to club Hong Kong. I buy a $50 VIP card (good for 3 months, so I can spread the cost of the card across 2 visits / 4 hotel nights), and stay at their hotel (Cascadas) for the Monday and Tuesday night VIP rate of $12 a night. Flight, hotel, ground transportation, and fully loaded visits with 5 or 6 girls in 2 days, all for under $1000.
Twice recently I did a day trip to Dallas when Southwest was having a sale, rented a car for the day, and I have discovered that I like Baby Dolls very much. Each time I left home at about 7am and was back home by midnight.
Next week, because Southwest was having another sale, I will fly into Orlando, rent a car, stay overnight somewhere south of Disney just off the interstate between Orlando and Tampa, and drive over to Tampa and Pasco County. I will be back home the next morning by about 11am.
Based on this discussion, I'm looking at DTW for some time in April.
Also, sorry for mangling your name, @Nidan111.
Detroit - Clear winner with club proximity to airport, inexpensive lodging and number of high, middle and low end clubs within a reasonable distance.
Toronto - #2 with higher lodging cost and the clubs a bit more spread out.
Tampa Bay - #3 but again the best clubs IMO up in Pasco county are a long way from TPA.
There really is only one choice: Detroit.
There are higher class clubs & dives close by and none will break your wallet and the taxi/uber won't break you either.
Every other city the better clubs are a fair distance away: there is nothing close to Atlanta, Newark, Logan, Providence, LAX, San Franciso, Seattle, O'Hare, LaGuardia, St Louis, New Orleans, Dallas or Denver. Orlando is flat to dangerous to club there anymore and I haven't been into Miami lately but I don't think any thin is close by.
Although West Babylon NY is not far from Kennedy
I like Nidan's east of St. Louis itinerary and have been to most of those places numerous times. But, they are about 30 minutes from the airport and the sketch factor won't suit all tastes.
Detroit too - shoot, trying to remember the name. Across the street from the landing strip.
Also an honorable mention for Seattle, which I hate to do because the city is turning into a shit hole. Successful in 4 of the 5 I've been in, multiple occasions.
However, cheaper than bopping around clubs to see if theres anything you like, or getting hustled and no goods, or worry of LE busting you or bouncers...
Have some drinks, allow everyone in the place to realize that you are going to get laid hardcore and let's have fun 😛