Strangest reasons you have been given for not fucking you.

avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
Atlanta suburb
"I can't because my boy friends birthday is this week and I want it to be special for him. We can do it next week!"

26 comments

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avatar for Nidan111
Nidan111
5 years ago
I have not come across this yet. I shall chime in when I do.
avatar for K
K
5 years ago
"I can't because my boy friends birthday is this week and I want it to be special for him. " I get this one a few times a year. Not within a week of their BF's bday, valentine's day or their anniversary is very common.

One woman told me she would be seeing her probation case worker which I believe is just a face name for parole officer. She did not want to do anything illegal or immoral the day before her meeting.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
5 years ago
Early on in my PL-career while living/SCing in Dallas - was hanging-out OTC (non-paid) w/ a thick ebony-dancer I knew - it was b/f her shift - I wanted to fuck her - she said she didn't wanna go to work smelling like she had just been fucked - no coochie for me
avatar for gawker
gawker
5 years ago
My ATF had a 6:00 am flight from Boston to Hawaii where she planned to stay for 3 months. I paid for her ticket with Delta miles, but it was expensive. I rented a $400 room at the airport Hilton. We got in bed and she said “I want my BF to have been the last one in me. But I’ll blow you.”
avatar for Mate27
Mate27
5 years ago
Dante’s hell must be a horney stripper who has to make money to get by.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
5 years ago
My old favorite Sugar didn't want to one night because she had her sister there and she didn't want her sister to know she sometimes fucked her customers. Of course, this was the stripper who thought nothing of eating out her own mother. I wonder what sister would have said about that.
avatar for jacej
jacej
5 years ago
@Dandy - ok, you can't leave a comment like that without telling the story.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
5 years ago
"... Of course, this was the stripper who thought nothing of eating out her own mother ,,,"

In all my time on TUSCL this may be a first
avatar for ime
ime
5 years ago
Some things need to be elaborated on.
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
5 years ago
Never had a strange reason. Always legitimate ugly or not enough money etc.
avatar for Spillthebeans
Spillthebeans
5 years ago
Was told "I haven't screwed the manager yet and if he is not first, then tightens up the VIP rules ".
She blew me in VIP with CIM, then straight to his office. Hope he loved to make out during his meetings.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
5 years ago
For the people who asked about the stripper who ate out her own mother, I wish I had a grand story to tell. I saw my old favorite Sugar pull this older lady up on stage and as sometimes happened there, she does some lesbian stuff with the old lady. The crowd predictably goes wild. I eventually got together with Sugar and ask for a dance. During her dance I told her I thought that lesbian show with the older lady was hot and she confessed it was her mom. I asked if she really said what I thought she said and she said yeah that's her mom. I didn't know what to say after that, and I think that was the last dance from her that day. I did continue to get dances with her but never saw her with her mother again.
avatar for Timbuck12
Timbuck12
5 years ago
I used to know a dancer that wouldn’t fuck in the late afternoon because she said when she went home to have sex with her boyfriend he could tell if she’d just had sex. “You feel different” he would tell her.
avatar for Array
Array
5 years ago
Stripper: “I can’t give you any better dance than this. I’m on probation.”
Me: “Why?”
Stripper: “I gave a cop a blow job and then he arrested me.”
avatar for goldmongerATL
goldmongerATL
5 years ago
My dad is here and I don't want him to see us go to VIP.

She was true to her word. Pointed out her dad, who is divorced. He took a girl to VIP and then left. When he left we went to VIP.

Ironically, she still lived with Mom who did not know she worked there.
avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong
5 years ago
One girl told me it because my dick wasn't big enough. Can you believe that?
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
5 years ago
Unbelievable
😄
avatar for magicrat
magicrat
5 years ago
"It's my son's birthday." We were supposed to have done OTC, but she did set me up with another dancer who she told to really take care of me. And she did so it wasn't a total loss.
avatar for rl27
rl27
5 years ago
I had one dancer say, "why should I? Once I do, you'll go for the next hot thing here."
avatar for SmashingHoes
SmashingHoes
5 years ago
Stripper told me it was her and her boyfriends anniversary and she wanted to be tight for him. She said she didnt want to have a beat up vagina hours before fucking him. She called it No BBC Tuesday

That Thursday - he had departed for work on business and we went back to our regularly scheduled program of me registering my weapon deep in her cervix.


avatar for rl27
rl27
5 years ago
I had one dancer at Henry VIII in Detroit once say something to the effect of , "I had too much to drink and might pee on you. I already had to change my underwear twice."
avatar for Jascoi
Jascoi
5 years ago
One girl said I was too big.
( that’s a nice problem to have.)
avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen
5 years ago
...I only do anal BDSM
avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen
5 years ago
I was like...well ok but not really my thing. Some of you pervs like cashman would probably fit the bill but anal is just not an endgame for me.
avatar for rl27
rl27
5 years ago
While not all are strange excuses, here are a few excuses I have heard over the years.

"My pussy is a bit over stretched from the last guy."

"My pussy is too sore."

"I have overworked my pussy, and I am taking a few weeks off of sex to recover"
avatar for Tiredtraveler
Tiredtraveler
5 years ago
OTR and she showed me the string.
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