Techniques to make a stripper fall in love with you

avatar for Muddy
Muddy
USA
There is this girl I have feelings for at the club. I want her bad not gonna lie. One method that have applied in real life is to get the stripper in my apartment, bar the door and play ”Mmmbop” by Hanson for a few hours until the songs inner meaning sort works itself into the subconscious of the dancer making her fall in love with me. So far it hasn’t worked yet they keep getting away. The last one escaped because I forgot to bar the window. I felt I just needed 15 more minutes on that one. We’ll give it another shot though.

Anybody out there have any other techniques out there shown to work? I’m in the market for romance.

28 comments

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avatar for jackslash
jackslash
6 years ago
Chloroform and duct tape.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
For me a couple of Benjamin’s always work
avatar for Bavarian
Bavarian
6 years ago
Simple. Become her drug dealer
avatar for herbtcat
herbtcat
6 years ago
You are using the wrong song. Try Tubthumping by Chumbawamba.

https://youtu.be/2H5uWRjFsGc

avatar for Icey
Icey
6 years ago
A lot of it depends on what you look like.

Being a drug dealer actually does work. Dancers love that.

Really just have shit in common with her, make her laugh.... Work on your body.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
^When the charmer who makes women laugh can’t even pick up on the fact that muddy was being facetious.
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
Try putting ghb in her drink
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
6 years ago
I follow the tried and true methods of the spiritual leader of Team WinningTeam

"Its in your best interest to take control of her drug use from the start. Make sure she does the minimum to get fucked up."
"Never ask her to do shit. Tell her to do it."
"Its about control."
"Don’t be afraid to discipline her. Eventually you’ll have to. Be manipulative with her feelings."
"She’s not happy with herself and never satisfied, she’s always looking for a quick fix and fast satisfaction."  
"The number one thing you need to do to fulfill her needs is to make her dependent on you for as much as possible. You basically have to manage her life. Its what these bitches crave"
"If she fucks with your main bitch keys your car gets violent with you, then slap the shit out of her. "
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
^ I like to use the technique pioneered by Frank Mesmer
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
^Franz fuckn autocorrects
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
6 years ago
"DATY".
avatar for RTP
RTP
6 years ago
Why exactly would you want a stripper to fall in love with you? Sounds like a whole lot of trouble to me. If she is a stripper, most likely you have already had sex with her. What else do you want?

avatar for Call.Me.Ishmael
Call.Me.Ishmael
6 years ago
RTP... the OP is not serious. Read the post.
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
6 years ago
I appreciate the tips, I might actually just change up the song, but honestly how can you not go crazy over the Hanson brothers. I might focus more on the feeling bad for running from me, more classic songs like Chicago-“If you leave me now” and Gordon Lifghtfoot-“If you could read my mind” would be perfect for the more pensive stripper. When shit gets desperate, you just have to go with Peter Cetera.
avatar for Uprightcitizen
Uprightcitizen
6 years ago
Lets see whats in Icy Losers bag of tricks...

Coke to wake her up from her drunken stupor
Molly to make her love 😍
Heroin to keep her coming back
...and Ghb when she comes to and tries to get away
avatar for MackTruck
MackTruck
6 years ago
Play her this song. Works every time...

https://youtu.be/lKcr5vkOxNs
avatar for Icey
Icey
6 years ago
Subraman..... Its what many want...They crave stability.


Uprightcitizen, actually the opposite. Give her the minimum....take care of her, don't destroy her.

Methhead Spice, I know what OP is doing, I don't care... I replied how I wanted to.
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
6 years ago
@Muddy: Nothing at all wrong with a bit of Gordon Lightfoot¡😀
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
—>“Methhead Spice, I know what OP is doing, I don't care... I replied how I wanted to.”

And how you wanted to reply was with zero sense of humor. Good job with giving off the impression you can impress by making them laugh (or so you claim).

Unless...they were laughing at you?
avatar for Icey
Icey
6 years ago
I'm not on here to impress anyone. And I can be more than humorous to bitches when I want to.
avatar for twentyfive
twentyfive
6 years ago
^ don’t worry you haven’t impressed anyone lulz
avatar for nicespice
nicespice
6 years ago
^look at that charming sense of humor 25 has 😊 (That Icey doesn’t have)
avatar for Icey
Icey
6 years ago
good one lulz

but Im still cuffing stripper hoes
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
6 years ago
Mostly you've got got to treat them exactly as you would treat any other woman.

SJG
avatar for prevert
prevert
6 years ago
I know this is a facetious post, but why the hell would I want a stripper to fall in love with me?

I just got rid of a wife, I don’t want another.
avatar for Huntsman
Huntsman
6 years ago
Muddy, I’ve tried this, without success thus far. First, I went with my general charm and good looks. Surprisingly, that hasn’t panned out quite as well as I’d hoped.

I figured it was my appearance and hygiene that needed work. So I would wear my least scratchy wool shirt, least oiled stained carharrts and my shit kickers. I’d make sure I’d showered within the last week or so. Thus far, I haven’t quite found success with a stripper GF that way but I’m hopeful.
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
6 years ago
Learning Spanish might help in some clubs.
avatar for san_jose_guy
san_jose_guy
6 years ago
^^^^^ When I get to TJ, I'll be demonstrating some hard learned Spanish.

SJG
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