Taking my wife to the club

SirLapdancealot
Knight of the Round Table Dance
So the other night my wife and I are drinking a bit and she suggests that we go to a strip club. It was completely unsolicited on my part, and given that she doesn't want and allow me to go anymore, I was more than willing to go. (I haven't been to a club for four months.) However it was past midnight and I didn't want to go for at most an hour, so we made a date to go in the future. My (first world) issue now is where do I take her?

A. A club where all the strippers are new to both of us?

or

B. A club where I've been a solo regular before and with some past faves dancing and where the staff for sure knows me?

"A" is the least risk but I actually want to see some past faves and hang with them and my wife, so I want "B". It may just be a fantasy but I envision a night with a fave flirting with both my wife and I the entire time as we drink and have a good time. However, I don't want to get into awkward situations like a fave coming up to me and grabbing my crotch just like old times or the bartender blabbing about how much they've missed me. If we go to "B", it will take some faith that my fave and the staff will show some discretion after seeing me again. I don't know it it is worth it to take that chance. I'll likely choose "A" because I don't want to chance my wife having a bad night. What say you, fellow married PLs and strippers?

41 comments

  • Warrior15
    6 years ago
    Go to one that no one knows you. Go to one where all the girls are ugly and there are no extras going on. It also needs to be smokey and kind of dangerous. Make it seem like she will never think there is anything wrong with you going again.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    ROFLMAO
  • Countryman5434
    6 years ago
    Definetely no extras lol. Probably would be best to go to a new club
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    I think you're looking for trouble, this will likely cause a lot of totally unnecessary drama, and angst, I think that especially now so soon after you've reconciled with your wife best to leave the past in the past, and not seek new avenues for trouble.
  • PaulDrake
    6 years ago
    As someone who has recently done this exact thing I would say absolutely without a doubt A.
  • Piggie
    6 years ago
    It's a trap, don't do it. Wives are evil!
  • JamesSD
    6 years ago
    A is your trial run. If that goes well you can do B another time
  • captainfun
    6 years ago
    “Forget” to do this altogether. If she presses, club A club is the only option.
  • reverendhornibastard
    6 years ago
    You sound like the kind of guy who would take sand to the beach.

    My recommendation:

    1) Take your wife to the mall.

    2) Buy her a very expensive tennis bracelet.

    3) Pray that she forgets all about this crazy idea of going to a strip club.

    Trust me, you’ll save lots of money if you follow my advice.
  • LolitaLove789
    6 years ago
    I’m with @piggie and @twentyfive even if she’s “okay” with it now doesn’t mean she will be when push comes to shove. I feel like it’s a trap even if she’s not intentionally setting it. Lol
  • WILLYSGOTAWOMAN
    6 years ago
    unless she knows all the details of your past clubbing don't go to a club you've been to before unless you're looking for a divorce
  • playfulsteve
    6 years ago
    I would ask, how is she drunk? I've seen couples who get along great under most circumstances (even at the SC), but as soon as 'that switch gets flipped' (she gets a lil too drunk). One wrong look by you towards one of the dancers.........and its all down hill from there...........
  • nicespice
    6 years ago
    A for Acropolis! Yes I know you have previously said negative things about the club, but it has cheap steak/beer, and not much of a roaming the floor hustle.

    You can just give her some singles to tip the dancers and assess her comfort level. If you guys want to do a couple dance, then the one way contact only will probably be a more friendly way to go about it as well.

    And if for whatever reason she decides she doesn’t like the idea of seeing strippers after all, then you guys can retreat to the corner and play video poker/slot machines.
  • 501traveler
    6 years ago
    Its a trap. Dont do it. She wants to see what type of women you're attracted to and how you interact with them. And trust me she will use it later against you. Just take her to Victoria Secret and let her pick out some sexy outfits she can model for you at home. Order Grub Hub, get a bottle of wine and stay in and have fun.
  • George123789
    6 years ago
    Follow 501traveler!!!!

    Never expose your hobby to the Boss - it will be used against you over and over and, yes Over!!!!
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    This isn't our first time to a strip club together. We have had dual private dances together but I doubt we will this time.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @nicespice the Acrop was in my pool of options for "A". Also Spyce and maybe Club Rouge because I was never a regular at them.

    And then maybe if she gets drunk enough I will suggest a few clubs I frequented. There are a few faves that I think I could trust because we have had conversations in the past about using discretion if they ever saw me come in with my wife.
  • lopaw
    6 years ago
    Most straight women don't do well in stripclubs and it's often not worth taking the risk of it all going horribly wrong, and you never hearing the end of it.
    I recommend conveniently forgetting about the whole thing and play dumb if she ever brings it up again, which she probably wont unless (by the sounds of it) you guys have been drinking.
  • Icey
    6 years ago
    Turn her out...
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @lopaw I hear what you are saying. I have been playing it off and haven't brought it up since that night. I intend to confirm whether or not she really wants to go when she is sober. But also I'm not rushing it because it's not that big of a deal anymore now that I haven't been going.

    If we go I'll make it a 50-50 date night where we will go see some live music, something she likes to do a lot and that I'm not as into, then go to a strip club which is something I like more than her.
  • jackslash
    6 years ago
    A wife goes with her husband, Dave, to a strip club for his birthday.

    They arrive at the club and the doorman says, "Hey, Dave! How ya doin'?"

    His wife is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.

    "Oh no," says Dave. "He's on my bowling team."

    When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual and brings over a Budweiser.

    His wife is becoming increasingly uncomfortable and says,"How did she know that you drink Budweiser?"

    "She's in the Ladies Bowling League, honey. We share lanes with them."

    A stripper then comes over to their table, throws her arms around Dave, and says "Hi Davey. Want your usual lap dance, big boy?"

    Dave's wife, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.

    Dave follows and spots her getting into a cab. Before she can slam the door, he jumps in beside her.

    He tries desperately to explain how the stripper must have mistaken him for someone else, but his wife is having none of it.

    She is screaming at him at the top of her lungs, calling him every name in the book.

    The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave."
  • skibum609
    6 years ago
    Option A, unless you prefer to be single.
  • georgmicrodong
    6 years ago
    Count me in the “run the other way, as fast as you can” crowd. If you simply must go, option A is the only rational choice. In addition, do *not* stage tip or get any dances yourself, make it all about her. If she asks why, “it’s all about you tonight, baby.”

    I also suggest never choosing option B. jackslash’s poat is funny, but there’s a core of realism to it. The first time a stripper calls you by your name, your wife will notice and likely call you out, especially if you’ve agreed not to go, and even if you *have* kept your promise.
  • lotsoffun201
    6 years ago
    The best thing that can happen is she loves it, let’s you go alone when you want, does crazy things in the VIP room with a dancer and you. The worst that can happen is everything else! I think you’re being set up and quash the idea gracefully.
  • Subraman
    6 years ago
    Obviously enough, I don't know your wife well enough to know what she's after, but my experience taking SBs and at least 10 female hang-arounds over the past few decades is, they will be happiest in a higher end, no extras, alcohol, all-show less-contact club that we here on tuscl tend to avoid. If you want to have fun with a female whose SC tastes are unknown, that's by far the safest place to start, and always a hit. Plus, make sure no one knows you, man!
  • gSteph
    6 years ago
    I recommend honesty, it's worked for you in the past (and it has been working for me). Ask her, now sober, if she is still on board with her suggestion, then admit you have been considering A and B (phrased differently), and want her honest opinion about your (shared) choice.
    Hiding hobby got you "grounded", this situation calls for honesty, - and most likely, choice A.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @gSteph absolutely honesty is the only true solution that works for my wife and I. (It's in our vows and we agreed to this after my last "bust" for going to strippers unbeknownst to her.) And on that note I am going to have an open discussion as to what she wants to do. I have already told her that I've been a regular at various clubs and that I had a few faves that I saw for a long time. As to whether or not she wants to meet them, I have no idea but I would support whatever she wants to do.
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    ^ You poor bastard you know this isn’t gonna end well ;(
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    ^ you don't know my wife and I.
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    That’s very true but women are more likely to carry grudges, often without realizing it, and explode when it’s least expected, whereas men are more likely to blow up and forget about it.

    I realize this is a pretty general statement but it holds true very often.
  • Cristobal
    6 years ago
    This sounds like the monger version of "Do these jeans make me look fat?"

    HER: Do you to go with me to a strip club?

    ME: I would love to take you to Disneyland (for example).
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    ^ excellent anolology
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    @twentyfive I hear you about women & men generalities but my wife and I are open. If she still harbored a grudge for me going she wouldn't want to go to a club in the first place. I'm pretty sure that she's in support of us going because she is in support of having a genuinely good time with me. It's no different than me wanting to go see a live band for her sake and enjoyment. In both cases we are open to doing something fun for the enjoyment of the other and neither of us would want to do something the other is totally against.

    Also if my wife were like other women we would already be divorced because of what she already knows. She knows how much money I spent on strippers and it's not a trivial amount.
  • twentyfive
    6 years ago
    ^ good luck
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    ^ thx and I'm taking this thing carefully.
  • gSteph
    6 years ago
    Addendum: If you do go for 'B', I'd call ahead and ask the bartender to not know you and to pass word on to any favorites.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    LOL @gSteph that's what I call "greasing the skid"
  • rick33
    6 years ago
    Its a trap, Luke. Ignore.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    My wife has willingly gone to the strip club with me multiple times throughout my marriage. She is also fine with me going alone when I'm on a business trip away from her. It's not a trap.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    My wife was fine with the low mileage dual dance we got one time. I think she would start to have an issue with medium to high mileage.

    I'm so glad she doesn't care for the big beefcake dudes in banana hammocks at the male strip clubs. Otherwise I would likely have to go to one with her if I wanted to go to a regular club.
  • SirLapdancealot
    6 years ago
    ^ No homo.
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