If you could go back to your first time in a strip club and give yourself some advice, what would it be?
Give Yourself Some Advice
comments (30)
Jump to latestDon’t fall in love. Don’t be an RIL. The chances are less than 10/90.
And, go back. The club is fucking fun. I’ll be there is less than 15 min and close the place out
@ DeclineToState
Oh I learned my lesson alright. Maybe one of these days I'll go back, but as of right now I think I'm done. It's all OTC with my ATF from here on out. It is time to leave fantasy land behind.
The advice I would give myself is simple... get out of Vegas. doing that would’ve saved me a half million dollars.
I would inform myself of what a R.O.B was. To keep count of the songs and not fall for the trickery.
dont dry your coke in the microwave cos that makes you one step away from a crackhead
Don't drive into Mexico unless you buy Mexican auto insurance first. See my article "Tijuana remembered".
I would have told myself to make multiple small trips rather than one big one and to negotiate everything before you start.
I would’ve told myself to save my money and move to Detroit
I would tell myself, "You can have sex with these hot dancers. Just ask."
I would tell myself, “focus on your career and education. Disposible income and wealth are needed to club with any regularity or for dicier activities.”
I would tell myself, “it’s okay to have sex with a hot stripper for free in your 19s and early 20s when it presents itself. The world won’t end.”
Don't use a credit card in a strip club. Or at least don't let the stripper know you are using one.
What Jack said. I couldn’t improve upon that advice.
A bush in the hand is worth two in the bush...
I barely listen to myself now, why would I listen to myself back then ;)
But srsly, back then get more contacts. Missed out on many a faves and potential faves. Although if I did get as many contacts then, I'd tell myself don't juggle so many faves. Bad for the wallet :P
Negotiate better and be patient. No need to jump at the first shiny object that comes over and says hello I wish I had the poker face then that I have now
Get more liberal with the ignore button;)
I would tell myself this is entertainment, not reality.
@twentyfive, I'm smashing that like button!!! :)
I would tell myself, "Well, my friend, if you keep this up, over your lifetime, it's gonna cost a lot in a lot of different ways!"
A strip club is not the place to be a white-knight
I would have told myself to turn around and wait, drive to Follies in the morning.
I had a good time my first time in the Southeast, just spent way way too much.
I would tell myself to be more direct.
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Everything is negotiable.
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Why did you come to a strip club with only $30?
100 is a great deal to have sex with that bartender so make sure you bring enough $$$
For me this was the early 90's during the 'hey day' of the strip club scene (near) where I live now, but grew up very nearby (COI), where there were a few straight out orgy palaces going on that I mostly missed out on, and caught the tail end of..... "Fuck buying all that porn, and video games and movies and music, go visit Hawaii Theater! NOW!" You think COI is the extra haven it is now, especially with all the internet intel....... Back then you didn't need it, all you had to do was show up!
I was young - and knew nothing about clubs. My advice would have been simple -
Enjoy this place - and never forget this place where $.25 is considered a decent tip!
I would give myself investing advice to avoid large investment losses. My strip club expenses seem puny in comparison and I often got something for the money.


I would tell myself to not go into the club. I would tell myself that it wouldn't be worth it.
The strip club is fun, but it didn't do me any good. I don't think I was ever cut out for the strip club scene. I made the classic rookie mistake of falling for a dancer. It didn't turn out terribly as most people warned, but it didn't turn out the way I wanted to either. My ATF means a lot to me and she will always have a place in my heart, but sometimes I wish I never met her.
I lay awake at night wondering how different my life could have been if all the time and effort I spent at the club was invested somewhere else.