Fantasy v Reality
doctorevil
Evil Lair
I don’t know how many times I have seen comments about strip clubs being a “fantasy” world. I don’t understand this point of view. Yes, ogling and perhaps groping lots of good looking girls is not something you get to do every day, but that doesn’t make it any less real when you do have the opportunity. And when I have a girl choking on my dick in VIP (or ideally back at my hotel), it just doesn’t get any more real than that. I go to strip clubs for the reality, not fantasy. I seem to be in the minority here. Anyone else share my view?
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79 comments
The fantasy part is that she enjoys it, and she's into you. Look how many guys here think the girls love when guys LDK, that they make strippers cum all the time, etc. The fantasy part is alive and well and an important part of the experience for most people. I imagine that the more that you're a "go in, take a girl to the back, pop, leave" guy, the less the fantasy part has any impact on you. Otherwise, it does, to some extent
https://www.tuscl.net/discussion.php?id=…
To the extent that you wanted a blowjob, and got a blowjob, that's reality.
To the extent that she didn't behave as if she were disgusted by the entire act, and you in general, that's fantasy :)
I'm there for the reality, but I'm thankful for the fantasy LOL
From the viewpoint of a non-extras dancer when successfully getting ~$350+ from a single customer (make that number higher if there was extras), fantasy is super important.
(... I promise that pun wasn't intended.)
You do all that and then you leave, and then you're back to reality.
Yep. There’s the off chance a dancer can just get along really well with a customer personally. And there’s no fantasy needed because both parties just genuinely click very well.
Ah hell, there was a customer for me personally who gave me way more than I asked for, because of that. And I was genuinely being myself. But then we started dating and we are still together over a year later. :p
But otherwise, it’s figuring out what a customer wants and being that girl. Ah hell, I’d say it’s important for lower amounts of money as well.
A guy wants a hot bitch and be a big shot? Sell to his ego.
A customer wants a nice girl, and only wants to give his money away if he feels like it’s going to a good purpose? Bring up college/children
A customer just wants to party and have fun? Be bubbly and outgoing (and either pretend to or actually get drunk)
It’s just to cast a wider net. Maybe it’s deceptive. But at the end of the day, it’s why a stripper is also called an “entertainer.”
I was just wondering what you meant because the number you mentioned the dancer making is exactly the cost of an hour VIP for my favorite club, and usually what I get. But I don't usually fall for any fantasy. All I want is a girl with big boobs and a nice ass to let me grope and grind away till my heart (and another body part) is content. If that's her selling me a fantasy, sure, she got me then.
I’ve also always wanted a foot fetish, because I’ve heard they are fantastic customers. But I’ve never attracted one, sadly. Maybe I should get pedicures more often.
Then there seems to be those that know it's a fake "relationship" but they enjoy the fake-relationship anyway and seem to treat the interaction as if she was an S.O. but know and accept it's not real.
Then there are those that just treat it like any other business relationship similar to going to a favorite diner and being friendly with the staff but it's not personal.
reality is where i am.
The fantasy is what she does, she would do it willingly.
For the PL, the settings and the interactions are mostly fantasy. Or, 'theater' if you prefer. But, of course, the physical side of it is real(ish).
For the dancer, it's a job.
Now, can you form a real connection at the club? Yeah but a lot of factors come into play. I've done it a lot and to be honest sometimes Im not sure I like it because the more I play up my fucked upness the more it attracts them.
But in most of the time at regular clubs, if you meet and connect pretty easily, you don’t have to go home alone.
At parties, regular clubs whatever she has no incentive to talk to you if she isn't interested.
In both scenarios, looks and attitude have a lot to do with it. Its really not about whether you're nice or a good person. The more fucked up you are but in control the more they like you
It can still be a fantasy and you can still be paying to fuck her. While still a very real and tangible sex act, it's still a fantasy experience.
Otherwise you would do it out in the real world with real world constraints. Wouldn't you? That would be real.
I think the fantasy aspect of SCing is a bigger deal than most PLs realize and they are willing to pay for it. The woman herself is largely a fantasy. IRL, you likely wouldn't be in such an intimate situations with such a hottie.
In my case, fantasy or not, i really value the real "moments", which is what real life is made of. Does paying for it afterwards make it not real? For many, the holy grail is free sex with a hot stripper. Even if a "relationship" with a stripper progressed to the point that she was mentally willing to do that with you, if she had any business sense at all she wouldn't because she would forgo potentially thousands of dollars a year from monetizing essentially the same experience. If you think about it, often the "losers" she's fucking for free in real life couldn't pay her much for it even if she wanted them to. So you might never really know how she really feels about it. That is if you wanted to know. Probably it's better not to know, ignorance being bliss and all...
At around $1000 a pop, its definitely worth it for them. But the experience is followed by very long showers, getting really fucked up, going to a spa or just something they view as "cleansing" of what they just did. Sometimes it makes it hard for them to have sex with men they actually like and to open up to men. Ive had side bitches who wouldn't let me touch them after hoeing.
I think its one thing for the trick and another for the hoe.
But I agree, the act may be real but the experience is a fantasy.
and 'reality' outside the club is i am too old and lack sufficient funds for my preferred civies.
:)
You forgot to mention addicted and emotionally damaged.
FWIW, in the organization I am building, it will be like that in real life. Better than any strip club.
SJG
Mason
https://www.allmusic.com/album/harbour-m…
1971
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fyeJk5W…
FWIW, in the organization I am building you will be getting this 365 days per year.
SJG
Carmen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Lx4ImMQW…
I know I do. I'm probably not alone. I've read about some of the shit that messes up the dancers (like 2 way contact and all the groping and the sex). Reading about them getting PTSD from the groping and it affecting their relationships or mental well-being horrified me. I try to treat the dancers like I'd want someone to treat someone special to me. She's someone else's daughter, wife, GF, or mother.
Maybe that's a little silly for a SC board like this. Sometimes I wish I'd compartmentalize it better like @twentyfive or @rickdugan do. They have children yet they do this. Countless others are like that, too. The explanation, though rational, is you're allowed to treat your family better. Yet they would rip the PLs tongue out through his throat if it was their daughter -- as would I. It's not healthy for me to be this bleeding heart about strangers (dancers). I do however think about the dancers and always treat them fairly as they deserve.
Nice touching post, @phatboy99.
And select the one you want to be waking up in the mornings with.
SJG
Carmen
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3h-fP4zS…
SJG
However, what's the solution? You asked if we give a fuck about the girls. My answer is, I care about them as much as I'd care about any person I'd meet. I wouldn't wish anything bad on anyone. That said, they chose to work in a club. A club that allows groping, some clubs even more. So what are we supposed to do, not go to clubs? Wouldn't that just fuck up the girls money? You called it dirty money, yet they return week after week to make it, right?
I'm curious, what do you suppose we PLs do?
SJG
But also, the over all results are better if you select the one you want to be waking up in the mornings with.
SJG
That's one solution. But as you analyzed, it's not a good solution, since it messes with her money and like you said, she willing chose to work there.
My solution, albeit not a better solution, was to buy dances but just sit on my hands or keep my hands to the side. Kind of dumb. and what monger or pervert does that?? Yet I did for a while. Stupid fucking SJW I as acting.
Ultimately I realized that's no solution. Like you said, they chose to work there. And whether or not the club allows it, I now do grope or touch if she allows it.
IRL Dancer feedback ranged from:
such a gentleman <3
.to.
are you sure you're enjoying yourself?
.to.
i dont give a fucking shit
.to.
treat me like a whore, c'mon
^^ there's my answer. Silly me.
such a gentleman
.to.
aren't you enjoying yourself?
.to.
i dont give a shit
.to.
treat me like a whore, c'mon!
I know for a fact I care more about my ATF than she does about me... and I'm fine with that.
The 'no touch' solution IMO is a terrible idea. If every strip club were an air dance, hands by the side type place I could only imagine the decline in the popularity of strip clubs. I for one would never set foot in one ever again if that happened. And I suspect I wouldn't be alone, so once again that's fucking with a lot of girls' money.
sounds good in theory, not always best in practice. I say treat them how and who you want them to be.... with the caveat of being within their limits/comfort level. The most important is building that comfort.
You might not get the point, but both patrons and dancers do. So what's the problem?
It's a hazard of the job, she's a free agent, and that's why it pays what it pays. It's also why we're there.
I just want them to respect my boundaries, respect my time, and pay me fairly.
What do you mean, nothing? Each time a guy goes to see a dancer in a club he's getting some kind of physical contact and good company for whatever length of time he pays for. For a lot of guys, that's all they want. To be able to have physical contact with a hot, usually much younger girl and then walk out with no strings attached.
Phatboy I see why you and SJG agree with each other all the time. Your MO is pretty much the same. You go to strip clubs in hopes of finding a girlfriend or an extended OTC type of affair. Hey if that's what you're looking for no one's stopping you. For you Phatboy it's probably easier. You sound like a younger guy and therefore attracting one of these young girls is easier for you. Not gonna comment on SJG's success rate in the club.
But for a lot of older guys, it's not feasible to go to the club looking for a girlfriend. More than likely a girl wants a boyfriend who is closer to her age, not twice or even more. And honestly most of these guys aren't looking for a girlfriend anyway. A lot of guys are married and still visit the club simply because they want company from a younger hotter woman than their wife. Thats the beauty of strip clubs. It's totally possible for a price. And once they walk out the club, the experience is over, just like they want. Not the same as dealing with a side bitch, who commands more time than you might be able to give AND presents a much bigger chance of getting you caught up with your main chick.
Phatboy99 you said you wouldn't want that type of customer/P4P relationship. Nothing wrong with that. But I hope you realize that same P4P/customer relationship is what keeps ALL clubs (including the one your girl dances at) in business and making money.
I come to the club looking for an OTC relationship. Most people may not agree with it, but everyone has their reasons for going. Whether or not you make it a part of your reality is up to you.
That's a really interesting perspective. I never thought of it that way. But it makes a lot of sense. If the guy feels satisfied I guess its worth it.
Not every girl has to resort to P4P. Smart ones realize that its about doing the least amount of work for the most $$$. They learn to tease and play with guys' feelings, whether just lust or more. How to get guys to buy more dances. Girls who end up doing P4P usually get really jealous of the ones who don't have to. I'm not completely knocking their hustle, some can make $$$$ doing it, but I've never known a girl whose head didn't get fucked up by it eventually.
Ive dated hoes before, honestly stayed with her for the money. In her personal life, she wasnt very sexual. It took her over a month to kiss me and another month before she'd have sex with me. We were both 17. She was as fucked up as she was beautiful.
I started going to strip clubs coz girls I knew started working there. For a lot of them it was their first job after high school. It was just like going to see a friend at work. Then you just end up hooking up...
After a while, it just became a habit and I treat the girls Im attracted to like I do the girls I know who work there. It has always worked for me. Then one thing led to another, sometimes I offer them management services or drugs. Some accept, some just want to hook up.
I go for young Latinas or young light skin black girls and it usually works. Haven't been rejected much really. I think the key is to relate to them on a certain level and fill a void they have.