Types of Dancers
pistola
Keepin' it 💯
BFF - take her to the VIP and she just tries to talk the whole time
Air Dancer - no explanation necessary
Alkie - Free drink whore
Porn Star - Not a porn star per set but an 'I'm gonna handle your biz and drain you dry' gal
The Stormy Daniels - she'll tell everybody about everything, big mouth gal
The Cockblocker - bought a dance from her earlier, she won't leave you alone
Door Vulture - Stalks those walking in
The Psuedo Intellectual - Prides herself of being smart and witty and wants you to know it
The DDs - The 'buy me a dance because *points at her gigantic tits*' gal
The Troll - Obese and not attractive compared to the rest of the shift, she.. is.. always... lurking...
LDK Queen - No explanation necessary
Have at it gentlemen (and ladies - you're even welcome too spice lady). Let's see what you come up with!!
Got something to say?
Start your own discussion
173 comments
Latest
The PL buys every word and eats it up like a ham-sandwich
And the VIP only dancers, never had one because I have to test drive first. Anyone ever had one of them? Do they actually deliver in VIP or is it like I expect......a rip-off.
The '$10 extra to touch me' dancers..... there's a club in Northern California (Gold Club Centerfolds) where at night time it's pretty much the standard. So every dancer says contact dances are $30, no touch dances are $20. They successfully converted the entire club, this is the only place I've encountered this.
The Buzzkill, thankfully only encountered this in low mileage clubs that I'll never set foot in again. Or girls that trip off of you adjusting yourself.
Man these are great, keep em coming!
Could you imagine what Subraman goes thru SCing in San Francisco - again not that there's anything wrong w/ that - you do you Subraman - no judging here on TUSCL unless it's a RIL (a tranny fave falls under "everyone has their type")
(*discussion board inside joke)
> Door Vulture - Stalks those walking in
Nooooooooo!! I only just got my drink and haven't even seen your stretch marks yet!
> The Psuedo Intellectual - Prides herself of being smart and witty and wants you to know it
I have also heard of physics! Please tell me more...
> The bareback is no big deal queen - tries to mount you bareback w/o even asking
Well... OK, you are exactly the kind of girl I would want to raise children with. (I'm not even shitting you guys, I swear she could tell)
Uhhhh yeah, some of us misogynists go from time to time. Lol
The Grand Wizard...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zM0KAh5w…
The Show is too epic to be left out, though:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDkqz5C6…
sometimes my hoes tell me its too big and they run to find pistola's tiny little cock after i've thoroughly worn them out
My bitches keep wanting to fuck pistola, too, but I haven't formulated a rationalization yet
Tell you her life history dancer. Within first sitting down, you know more than you ever want to know about her dead beat fiancé, three kids with different fathers, car and house she just bought.
Automaton Lapper. Sits on your lap in one position through out the dance, motion and speed never waving.
Hey everyone I am giving a dance, dancer. Dancer who talks loudly in the next booth over while you are trying to enjoy your dance.
Fitness coach. A usually hard bodied dancer who lets you know her workout routine in complete detail, and gives out fitness advice. Extreme cases even try to get you to join them at their fitness club.
Nutritionist. Similar to Fitness coach but talks about nutrition instead.
The Broadway-Bound : she knows how to high-kick, has a choreographed performance prepared, uses a top hat or a cane, asks "how did you like my routine". Broadway-Bound can transmogrify into ...
The Special Effect : fire-spitting, or bathing in giant champagne glasses, and always ready for a pole-trick when unnecessary.
Generally neither The Broadway-Bound nor The Special Effect gives anything like a worthwhile lap-dance. There are also Circus Acts (really, I ride a unicycle to work! really! with my pet anaconda!) and Acrobats or Aerialists (I once did a number suspended from three cables over Niagara Falls ...). You get the gist.
This girl can also be called the village bicycle or the neighborhood mattress.
The Big Frog - a 7-9 dancer who works in a dive club ("little pond") where the other dancers average no better than 6
The Double-down - still in her 20s but has had two or more kids with the same on again/off again baby-daddy